Category Archives: Domestic Violence

Bruises & Red Wine

Such, an odd, combination…

Bruises and red wine, they go so well together, don’t they?  Every single time, you’d bruised me, you’d, spread the red wine over my injuries, to help it get better, to make the pain that much, sweeter…

note how the colors…

photo from online

Bruises and red wine, that became, my life from before, I knew you were violent, but I can’t snap out of this cycle of abuse, because my father had, beaten my own mother too, and I’d, watched, and learned from the interactions, of how she’d always, apologized to him, for making him angry, giving him, an even, higher up status in the family, and he’d ruled over us like a king, and we were, peasants, without any say in anything!

Bruises and red wine, well, I’d had enough bruising in this FUCKED up (so???) lifetime of mine, and now, I’m downing those, bottles of red wine, one right after another, and another, and another (kinda like how you would, use those, alcohol cotton swabs to sanitize those, open sores!), only, that the red wine, they don’t do enough, to DROWN all the pain out, instead, it’d, made the bruises, magnified.

and the color of this

photo from online, are similar!

Leave a comment

Filed under Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Because of Love, Domestic Violence, Properties of Life, STUCK in a Cookie Jar, Vicious Cycle

She Was Abused by Her Cohabiting Boyfriend, Ran Away from Home with Her Daughter, Thirteen Days Afterwards, She was Dead

Abused to DEATH, by her cohabiting boyfriend, DESPITE how the laws are already, set up, to protect people from this sort of, horrid lovers, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

A woman in Tainan was abused by her cohabiting boyfriend, Chen, the victim took her ten-year-old daughter, and ran away, moved to Kaohsiung, but she’d sustained the multiple physical injuries on her, started spitting up blood at home, on the evening of the eighth, she fell ill, was taken to the hospital, the following day, she’d worsened, and died; the police charged Chen on assault causing death, breaking the laws to prevent domestic violence, the Chiaotou D.A.’s Office set the bail at $50,000N.T. after they’d interrogated him, and he had to report to the local subprecinct twice per week.

The police investigated, the victim was around thirty, started dating Chen four years ago, took her daughter who was only six, lived in with Chen at the residence on the West side of Tainan; on May 28th, the victim had a verbal altercation with Chen, was beaten by him physically, it’d caused her to sustain multiple injuries.

As Chen left, the victim discussed with her sisters, worried that she may get abused by him again, took her ten-year-old daughter, ran away out of Tainan, moved to Zhuoying, Kaohsiung to stay temporarily.  She’d only thought the injuries she’d sustained were only physical, that she just needed a few days’ rest and will recover, but on the eighth of June, she’d suddenly fell ill, started puking up blood, as her younger sister saw, she’d called emergency, and stated to the operator, that her sister was beaten by her cohabiting boyfriend.

As the victim was taken to the hospital, she fell into a coma, during which time she regained conscious, and told her families of what had happened, the police took the statement of the daughter on the ninth, and on that evening, the victim’s condition took a turn for the worst, she’d died of multiple organ failure, and the case is being prosecuted as assault causing death.

The police had Chen into the station, Chen stated that he had, argued with the victim, but was evasive toward the questioning of physically abusing her, the preliminary checks of the body, the death can’t be determined, they will conduct an autopsy on the thirteenth to clarify the cause of death.

And so, this woman got abused to death, by her cohabiting boyfriend, and this still just showed, how dangerous is it, to stay with an abusive man, because it’d happened once, it will, happen, again, again, and again, until the victims die, or do something to escape.  But in this particular case, the victim didn’t escape, she died!

Leave a comment

Filed under Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Domestic Violence, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Spousal Abuse, Tragedies in the World, Wake Up Calls

The Ten-Year-Old Child Refused to Go to School, the Mother Went Berserk, Started Beating Him, Nearly Murdering Him

And, this ten-year-old KID’s refusing to go to school is still, just that, FINAL straw that cracked HIS mama’s, back here!  Because you don’t go into a beating rage on your own child, because he refused to go to school, and this still just showed, how bad an emotional control this parent had…off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

Last year, a woman, Liu, because her ten-year-old son refused to go to school, they got into an argument, and she’d lost it, other than choking her own son, disregarded his cries out of pain, she’d started, physically assaulting him with a fruit knife, fire extinguisher, nearly murdering her own child; after Liu’s attack on her own son, she’d, started mutilating herself, saw how her son was still breathing, she’d called emergency services, and her son wasn’t murdered by her.  The Taichung D.A.’s Office charged her on attempted murder for breaking the laws of child protection, and the adults’ intentionally harming a child.

The indictment pointed out, Liu (age 37) age 37) shared the childrearing responsibilities of their ten-year-old son with her husband, but started in the son’s fourth grade year, he’d started refusing to go to school, due to psychological problems, and Liu started getting into fights with him on it frequently.

At seven in the morn on October first of last year, Liu’s husband already went off to work, and Liu and h son started fighting over him going to school again, then suddenly, Liu snapped, started strangling her own son’s neck, as her son kept struggling, fighting her off, she finally, let go.

Liu ran to the bathrooms, attempted to kill herself by strangulation of a charger wire, but her son stopped her, she’d turned toward him, with both hands on her son’s neck, disregarded how her son cried for her to stop, used the fire extinguishers, and started smashing down on her son’s head multiple times, then, used the fruit knife, started stabbing her son’s neck, causing her son to fall to the floor with serious injuries, with the hematoma on his scalp, neck and shoulder, thorax and abdomen lacerations.

As Liu saw her son fall to the ground, she’d started attempting suicide using the fruit knife, the fire extinguisher, but realized that her son was still breathing, she’d come to, and immediately called up emergency, as the two of them were rushed to the hospital, both their lives were, spared, as Liu was discharged from the hospital, she’d answered truthfully to what had happened, how she’d, attacked her own so, as the D.A. and police inquired her.

The district attorneys considered that the boy was severely wounded, and that as Liu attacked him, she’d gone after the vital organs and parts of his body, the neck, the abdomen, that she had intended to murder him, that there’s a need to add more sentence to the severity of her crime, but considering how she’d stopped that she’d called the police, the fire department for help, turned herself in, showed remorse over what she did, that she’d, qualified for the criteria for a reduction of sentence, yesterday the D.A;s office prosecuted her, and asked the courts to give her a fitting sentence.

Yeah, for some unknown reason, this mother just SNAPPED, and attacked her own son so brutally, but, she had stopped herself, DEAD in her own tracks, before she complete the murder, so that counts for something, right?  Well, that’s what the court rulings stated, and, I’m sure, that this is still, an accumulation of the events between this ten-year-old boy and his mother, that his refusing to go to school this time, was that final straw that made his mama, went on a murderous, rampage, and attacked him.

Leave a comment

Filed under Abuse, Bad Parenting Behaviors, Domestic Violence, Messed Up Values, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Psycho Parents, Social Awareness, Social Issues, White Picket Fence

He Was the One Breaking Up with Her, But Decided He Wanted Her Again, Abducted Her, Tied Her Up, then, Raped Her

Yeah, and this mother @#$%ER (maxed out!) still only got that SLAP on the wrist, considering, how he is more than likely, to, go after this ex-girlfriend of his again, given what’s happened already!  Off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

Her Again, Abducted Her, Tied Her Up, then, Raped Her

Transferred $100,000N.T from Her Account to His, No Remorse After the Fact, the Second Trial Found the Man Defined by the Horrid Lover Clause, Sentenced to Eleven and a Half Years

The man, Yu, two years ago, broke up with his girlfriend, the day after the break up, he’d, returned, took her by force, tied her up, beaten her, tortured her then, raped her too, and, used her fingerprint, to log onto her bank account online, and transferred $100,000N.T.  The first trial found him guilty of forced sexual behaviors and threaten to get money, gave Yu five years four months; the second trial found, that Yu’s behavior was “fitting to the behaviors of the horrid lover”, no remorse, with a bad attitude, changed the charges to robbery and forced sexual intercourse, sentenced him to eleven years six months.  The Highest Court tossed back the appeals, case closed.

Yu is in the electronics industries, talked of marriage with his girlfriend, but often cussed her out, called her a “bitch” repeatedly, and there were the photos of sexual intimacies on his cell phone with other women too; on January 31st, 2020, he’d told her he wanted to break up with her, but the following day, he’d, gone back on his thought, suspected that his girlfriend had taken up with another before he broke up with her.

At nine that evening, Yu asked his girlfriend to accompany him back to their rental stay, he’d used an electrical wire, the tape to tie up her hands, demanded her to do what he’d told her to, go take a bath, sleep, unlock your cell phone, telling him her password to unlock her phone, so he can check her contacts, that if she’d refused, he’d beaten her up.

Yu loosened his girlfriend temporarily, but, took the cell phone, to connect to the surveillance in the residence, to keep tabs on her every move, and, his girlfriend can only do what was told; on the early evening of February 2nd that same year, Yu took advantage of his girlfriend being tied down, and couldn’t fight back, raped her, then, slapped her, used her finger print, to unlock her online bank account, transferred $100,000N.T. from her account to his own.

To get herself free, the girlfriend falsely agreed to move in to Yu, claimed that she needed to return to work to pick up the things she needed, Yu demanded that she turn on her camera, to control her; as the girlfriend returned to the dormitory of her school, she’d asked for help from her R.A., and called the police.  Yu denied the allegations, claimed that he’d not actually threatened her, that everything he’d done, was to get her back with him; that the transfer of the money was only a means, to make his girlfriend stay, as it’d worked from before.

The High Courts believed, that Yu had, ordered the woman around, cussed her out, that when his girlfriend didn’t do as he’d told her, he’d, started, cussing her out, that as he’d broken up with her, he’d felt uneven, tied her up, beaten her down, raped her, and, used her assets at his own will, that his behaviors qualified as that of the horrid lover’s, causing psychological and physical traumas in his girlfriend, and showed NO remorse, with a bad attitude, sentenced him to eleven years six months on robbery, forced sexual acts.  The Highest Courts tossed back the appeals, case is closed.

And so, this, is what this LOSER got, and it’s still, too, light a sentence, because, who’s to say that after eleven and a half years in prison, or shorter, as he may be out with good behaviors, he won’t go after his ex again, I mean, this time, because he’d broken up with her, and wanted her back, he’d taken her by force, raped her, and this woman will NEVER be fully and completely, safe, until this LOSER gets, locked away, for good!

Leave a comment

Filed under Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Awareness, Cost of Living, Domestic Violence, Knowing the Law and Breaking It, Life, Love Became Revenge, Love Turned into Obsession, Messed Up Values, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Properties of Life, Violence Against Members of Opposite Sex, White Picket Fence

What I Couldn’t, Recall, from Before…

What I couldn’t, recall, from before, it all came, flooding back, into my mind, too fast, I can’t, process them, and the dusts never, settled down fully, nothing was, calm, again!

What I couldn’t, recall, from before, why are they, all hitting me hard now?  Why do I need to, remember, all of these things of pain from my younger years, why can’t my mind, just, keep me, deceived, as it’d done before, huh?

difficulties accessing the memories locked inside the brains! Image from online

What I couldn’t, recall, from before, it’d all, come back out, of the darkness of my, unconscious, passing through the grays of the, subconscious, into, the consciousness that’s me!  What I couldn’t, recall, from before, they’re all coming back, one by one, a fact here, a fact there, several on a day, none on the next, too many to cope on the following day after that.

Until, until, everything that’s happened to me in the past, presented themselves, collectively, to me, inside, that, Pandora’s, box………

Leave a comment

Filed under Abandonment of Children, Abuse, Awareness, Childhood, Children Murdered, Domestic Violence, Innocence Lost, Life, Negligence, Properties of Life, Suppressed Memories

The Man with a Reputable Status in the Local Community is Abusive Toward His Wife & Young Son

Because the family is powerful locally, that’s why, the woman interpreted the police’s leaving as having to do with how they feared the family, but it wasn’t, because the police had come and knocked on the door, and nobody responded, and there was a traffic accident, which they took to be more pressing, that’s why they’d, left, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The woman, Wang remarried with a young child, in the two years, the mother and son had been abused by her husband, Nien, after the Changwha D.A.’s Office charged Nien with physical assault two days ago, Wang opened up to the press about what had happened in her marriage, other than having her cell phone controlled, because of how the family is powerful, the neighbors didn’t DARE say a thing, although she’d gone to the police on accusations of abuse, but the police came, and heard the side of the story from the Nien family, then left.

Nien’s uncle is a former deputy of the city council, well known for stealing and selling the gravel concrete, back in 1996, he’d been charge and sent to Ludao, and used the opportunity of being transported to the external hospitals, made his escape to China, and died in China ultimately.

Wang accused, that as she started dating Nien, they were very close, they married six years ago, but two years ago, Nien became a different person, had physically abused her and her young son, and demanded that she never leaves his sight, that when she goes to the bathrooms, she’d needed to leave the door open so he could see her, he took her cell phone, and, deleted her contact, severed her from contacts of the outside world.

The local substation stated, that the footage of him kicking the young boy was from this March, Wang claimed that she’d called the police on the evening of July 28th, two officers came, and heard the family’s side, then left, and as they checked the records, the officers knocked on the door, but no one responded, and there was a traffic call to the officers, that’s why they’d, left so soon.

Wang called another time on July 29th, the substation immediately took the case, and that day, the mother and son were placed away, but, the first time the domestic violence call came, there were, the improper means of handling it, and the police will reprimand the officers responsible.

And, you can see, how it’s easy, for this abused woman, to attribute why the police didn’t come to her rescue as such, because the family is powerful, with ties in the local community’s political realms, but, it actually, isn’t that the police didn’t take the case, but because they went to the home, and nobody answered, and there was another more pressing traffic call that’s more urgent.

Leave a comment

Filed under Abuse, Domestic Violence, Life, Nowhere Is Safe, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Spousal Abuse, Unsafe in the Schools, White Picket Fence

Seeking Assistance

How did it end like this?  Why did she put up with it this long, and no, abuse is NOTHING to “get used to”…off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The legislator, Kao’s abuse by her boyfriend shocked the communities here.  At the same time, the Department of Welfare Sanitations posted its survey results of women living under violence, one out of every five female had been abused, most frequently occurring is the emotional abuse, which showed, that the battered women population are, taking up the majority.  Kao is a public figure, and her being abused got the sympathies of the society.  And yet, there are, many women who are without the abilities, the drives who’d been abused living in the darkened corners, not known where to get the assistance they needed, nor dared to speak up and out about their abuse, and can only, cry in the nights.

It hurts us, seeing the bruises and scars of Kao; but those bruises will eventually heal, and yet, the psychological traumas, not so, easy.  The damages from the verbal abuse normally exceed the effects of the physical abuses, like a dagger that stabbed into the hearts, hard to recover from.  A lot of women, when they’d been abused verbally, chose to keep it muffled up, which led the abuse to worsen, into physical eventually.

here’s trailer, and you can find the full-length movie from YouTube

The American movie, “A Fall from Grace”, about the middle aged woman, Grace, who’d been divorced, and, met a handsome, gentle, younger man, at first, he’d treated her like she’s a goddess, fooled her into believing that she’d found a good man, not known, that that, was the start of her, nightmare, the man cheated her out of her money, and insulted her verbally too, and, Grace had, fallen into the traps of love the man set for her, to the end, she’d become, a murderer, killed her abusive husband.

Do NOT let the love turn into a worst nightmare, I hope, that you will meet the right person, a kind man or woman, to be with you for the rest of your lives.

And so, this, is on how the victims (enablers) of abuse usually chose to, put up with the abuse, due to, whatever BULLSHITTING excuses they can come up with, and, by not going to the cops that first time you got beaten, or screamed at and apologized to (verbal abuse???) , or emotionally blackmailed by someone, you’d gone from a poor, pitiful VIC, into an ENABLER, and the reason why the other person gets away with abusing you, it’s still because you’re, allowing them to, because, you CAN’T work up the courage, to ask for the help you need, to BREAK free!

Leave a comment

Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Awareness, Domestic Violence, Life, Messed Up Values, Properties of Life, Spousal Abuse, Violence Against Members of Opposite Sex, Violence in the Media, Wake Up Calls

How Did She Put Up with it, Getting Beaten from When She Was Younger, into the Elderly Years, How Did She Ever, Get “Used to It”?

On how the abuser/enabler relationship just, NEVER, ends, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The legislator Kao, of the DDP had been abused by her boyfriend, causing the citizens in this country to get angry over how the loser behaved, because of Kao’s status as a politician, that was what helped her bring out the matter of domestic violence in the society.

I’d been volunteering at the hospital for a decade, and had seen a ton of battered women, whose abusers are normally, their partners, what’s worse was, these batterers chased them to the E.R., then, DRAGGED the victims out the back door, and started, beating on them again.  These abusers are, the bullies of their families, only abused their own wives, the weaker women, and young children, very shameful; picking on the elderly, the women, and children, it’s a show of inferiority, but it’d become, a nightmare of, the families.

While the victims of domestic violence, feared that the bad news of the families might get out, or maybe, due to economics, or to keep a family together, and one’s own image, and so, they’d put up with the abuse for many years on end, then, headed over to the hospital to get their injuries documented, to file a restraining order with the courts.  There’s a woman who’d come to get treated for abuse, she’d told me that she’d been beaten from when she was younger, I’d asked, “how could you have put up with it this long?”  she’d told me, “got used to it”, it was heart wrenching to hear, I couldn’t imagine how she lived through all those, years.

I’m supportive of Kao’s suing her boyfriend, and hoped that the members of the public will be braver, to stand UP and OUT in these situations, because only by reporting the cases, to fight for the rights of our own bodies, will we be able to, put an end to these threats in our lives, to terminate domestic violence.

So, even though, abuse is NEVER anything we should get used to, but, because the victims got trapped in that situation too long, they took it to be the norm, and, stopped fighting, and thus, stopped asking for help, which is precisely W-H-Y, these cases are still, underreported by the victims right now, and besides, it’s usually the spouses, the boyfriends/girlfriends who are hurting the victims, and, as the abusers pouted up their lips, faked that one tiny teardrop out of her/his eyes, then, the abused victims, soften down, and NOT pressed charges, and they’re all, STUCK, in that, vicious cycle, as ENABLERS of their own, ABUSE.

Leave a comment

Filed under Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Awareness, Cost of Living, Domestic Violence, Improper Misconducts, Messed Up Values, Nowhere Is Safe, Properties of Life, Right to Life, Social Awareness, Vicious Cycle, Wake Up Calls, White Picket Fence

Feared “Losing Face”, the Experts: Social Support is Most Important

Reasons why the abused that are famous would normally not seek out help when they are, abused…off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The legislator, Kao being physically abused by her boyfriend, mentioned that as it’d happened first time, she’d felt ashamed; the dean of the counseling department of Tainan University, Chen told, that women who are higher up in socioeconomic statuses, after being abused, normally go through a period of feeling helpless, not dared to seek out help, let alone, the members of the general public who’d been, abused, that it’s important that we have the social support from the outside communities, and the education of gender equality, to help the victims of abuse get out.

and here are, the signs, found online…

how many matched your relationships???

Chen told, that the victims of domestic violence aren’t all women, but women make up the bigger population of those who are abused, and the abusers would give the victims the mindset of “it’s because you’re not good enough, making me angry, that’s why I hit you, it’s all your fault…”, causing the female victims to wonder, “is it my fault, had I not done this or that, would he not have, beaten me?”

After Kao was abused, other than having the sex tapes in her boyfriend’s possessions, causing her to not go to the police, it may be “was it my fault” mentality? Had I not made him jealous, then, would he not have, beaten me?  That sort of sense of uncertainty of her own, guilt, and, even as women who’d been trained that the sexes are equal, being raised under the patriarchal ideals, it’s still, rooted down too deep.

Chen made the example, the former C.E.O. of CTS T.V. Station, Hsu’s being raped, and after she walked out of the shadows more than a decade later, she’d gone public with her own experiences, published, “The Survivors of the Nights”, but before she went public, others had questioned her, that it’d happened so very long ago, was it worth it now, to get it out in the open?  Would it not cause a damage a second time, to put her under the negative experiences again; the MeToo movement gave a ton of courage to the victims, Kao’s being able to step out, is quite brave, although the supports for the victims are increasing in Taiwan now, but there’s, still room for improvement.

The director of a psychiatric clinic in Chiayi, Lee told, that there are six signs of “dangerous lovers”, including, keeping a close eye on the person, verbal violence, not respect the individual, over involvement into the other person’s life, ignoring the feelings of the other individual, verbal violence, that before diving in to a relationship, start as friends first, and observe the person more, to understand what s/he is truly like, and if you find yourselves in danger of abuse, seek help immediately.

The Crime Prevention Department of Zhongzhen University dean, Cheng pointed out, that the abusers would use threats to hurt her/himself, to threaten the one breaking up with her/him, to the point of, losing her/his own life in the process, and at this time, the relationship should NOT be severed off immediately, but to be patient, to reduce the times you’d interacted with the other individual, and as the relationships fazed off then, break up.

And so, these, are what we all need to, watch out for, men AND women alike, to seek out help when there’s a need, to NOT feel ashamed, because it’s NOT our faults, just because we are men, or women, because abuse still does NOT discriminate against gender, race, age, etc., etc., etc., any one of us can become victims of domestic violence here.

Leave a comment

Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Awareness, Bad Behaviors, Domestic Violence, Violence Against Members of Opposite Sex

The Higher Up the Socioeconomic Status in Society, More Worried that it Would Damage the Image, and that the Fact that Abuse Happened Will Get Found Out

Because of their status, and they’re, victimized, and they feel, ashamed, which is why these high-profile cases of abuse are, underreported…off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The legislator of the DDP, Kao was abused by her boyfriend, and the incident was found out fifteen days after it’d happened on the news media, that was when she’d gone to the police and pressed charges.  The manager of the National Jinan University International Domestic Violence Research Center, Wang stated, based off of researches, the females usually put up with their abuse silently for an average of six years, if it happened in the rich and famous, the women considered their status quo, their images, and, would select to remain silent about it even more.

Wang told, that whether it be women with a higher up status, they’d normally put up with the abuse, because they’d taken into considerations of the intimate relationship they shared with their abusers, the emotional attachments, even economics, the children, and families, it would be quite difficult, to work up the courage to tell; for those with a higher social status, more considerations are put in, including social image, the situation, so not getting help has nothing to do with bravery, but how the abused have their own timelines, knowing how far they needed to prepare, before any actions are, taken.

Wang said the acts of violence will come up slowly, if it’d happened once, then, it will certainly, happen twice, three times, and when the abuser realized that something isn’t right, and attempted to control the victim more by restricting the movements, using violence, or emotional, psychological threats, the women need to caution, “ZERO tolerance for violence” being the prime rule.

And so, most of these abused women, they have a lot to consider, when thinking on whether or not they should, come out to the open, especially if you’re famous like the legislator, it’s even harder, but, by not coming out into the open, you’re only signaling to the individual who’s abusing you, that s/he can, keep on doing it to you, and there’s, NOTHING you can do about it, because you’re afraid, of getting your reputation damaged, and the individual is going to keep on controlling you, because you’re, letting him.

2 Comments

Filed under Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Domestic Violence, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Perspectives, Spousal Abuse, Vicious Cycle, Violence Against Members of Opposite Sex