Category Archives: Childhood

Dreams, Kept Safe, in the, Rabbit Hole

Dreams, kept safe, in the, Rabbit Hole, until, until those, landscapers came, to redo Alice’s parents’, gardens, then, all HELL breaks loose!

The Rabbit Hole was supposed to have been all Alice’s own, her secret hiding place for her dreams, fantasies, her fears too, and yet, one day, her parents decided, to redo the landscape of her garden, and, dug everything up, then, everything was gone, when Alice came home from school that day.

desperately trying to follow her childhood fantasy down the rabbit hole! From online

She’d felt betrayed by her parents, how could they, how could they, just, dig up all her dream in the Rabbit Hole without HER permission?  I mean, yeah, fine, the garden, the home, everything on the land belonged to her parents, sure, but, how could they, prod into, her private little, haven?

Dreams, kept safe in the, Rabbit Hole, she thought, she’d found, a secure and, secret place for all her dreams, her fears, and her hopes, but she’d, miscalculated everything.

That was, the very last time, Alice came back to that garden of her childhood, where she’d fallen asleep, and saw that Rabbit running late…………

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Filed under Abandonment of Children, Childhood, Innocence Lost, Invasion of Privacy, Life, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, White Picket Fence

A Secret Portal Back to Her Childhood, Alice Had, Found…

A secret portal back to her childhood, Alice had, found.  She was so happy, and eager to jump right in, because she’d, forgotten all about what’d happened to her as a very young child previously, only remembered the wonderful things, the dreams of, cotton candy cloud, unicorns, what-nots that she’d had from before.

So, she’d, followed that Rabbit that’s, running late (life’s calling, honey!!!), and, slid down that secret portal back to her childhood, and, started adventuring, back to, before.

she’d crawled in…

S**T (b/c children aren’t supposed to cuss???), I’m STUCK! Found online

A secret portal back to her childhood, Alice had found, but, the moment she’d, started, falling down into the abyss (the Rabbit Hole), she’d, regretted it, and, there’s still, NO turning back to her, she got to, see it through, remember what was once there, but, forgotten already!

A secret portal back to her childhood, Alice had found, she’d, ventured, deep, into that hole, and, got her head chopped off by the Queen, and, because she’d died in her dreams, she can’t, wake back up, into, the reality again…

So, guess, she shouldn’t have been, curious, and now she’d learned, that curiosity does NOT just KILL that C-A-T, it’d, killed her too!

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Filed under Abandonment of Children, Childhood, Children Murdered, Children that Didn't Have to Die, Innocence Lost, Life, Properties of Life, Queen Tina's Fables

The Crack of My Bedroom Door

How this, grandmother, helped preserved the dreams of her young granddaughter’s childhood memories, by allowing her to stash the items she’d sent through the crack in the door to her room, translated…

After I was done with the chores, I’d shut my bedroom door, so I can, lean against the chair, to read the articles of the writer, Xi, then, the rustling noises had come in, distracted me, turned out, it was, a page of the calendar that’s, made its way in, from the crack in my door, it was, dancing in the wind.  I can’t help but smiled, picked it up, and, set it down where it originally was.

My young granddaughter who’s about to enter into the first grade, is a chatty little thing, chimed all day long, begged the adults to answer her inquiries of “Why”, and she could, always, BREAK the bottom line of our, patience, and, my door shut meant my declarations of, “Do NOT Disturb”, and yet, kids will be, kids, the adults’ rules, they would, always, try to, break them, and, glad that they’d done it.

The young child didn’t have her own space, and the toy bins had been, stuffed too full, and, she’d, set her mind, on using some of my, closet space for storage.  Everything her parents wouldn’t allow her to keep, she’d, shoved them into my space, especially those before-school exam papers, the torn off calendar pages, the ads from McDonald’s……basically anything with the blank page on the back, she’d loved, because, she’d enjoyed doodling, and, as she’d finished drawing on the page, she’d, made them into a volume too.  All these things considered as garbage by us, she’d, cherished them like they were, some, priceless, possessions, and I can only, be more, tolerant of that.

The young child had, tried stashing her cherished items here and there, and, the three-centimeter crack on my door, became, a secret transport portal: the childish doodles and drawings, her favorite snacks, the Barbie with the broken leg, the sticker she received for her doctors’ visits, anything, you can name.  seeing that page of torn off calendar that’s entering into the crack of my door, I can’t help but sighed, that there’s only, a very short period of time when the childhood dreams stayed, intact, because, there’s signs of maturation of her in her eyes, every day now.

This is the realizations of an adult, noting just how, precious childhood is, that once it’s gone, it’ll be, gone for good, and, this young girl has a perfect “secret hiding place” for all the things she cherished and held dear to her heart and her mind, in her, grandmother’s, room, through that, “secret portal”: the tiny crack on the door!

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Filed under Child Development/Education of Children, Childhood, Interactions Shared with the World, Life, Memories Shared, Parent-Child Interactions, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

The Increase in Cases of Child & Adolescent Sexual Assault Cases, the Human Rights Foundation Started the Research of Visiting the Cases

In hopes, that somehow, this can, help reduce the number of cases!  This DDP government is still, WAY too ideal, but nowhere NEAR real, in this matter too, from the Front Page Sections, translated…

There’d been many cases of child sexual assault cases, the National Human Rights Committee announced the systematic data collection of the systems of reporting these things nationally, Chen who’s the head of the Examination Department, and a chairperson of this committee stated, that the prevalence of child and teen assault cases recurring again, that this is the first time the Human Rights Agency started up the national’s reporting systems, hoping to lower the number of these cases.  The member of the committee, Chang told, that the preventative interviews would be of five hundred individuals, and the results of this research will come out by July of next year.

Chen stated, that based off of the reported cases of 7,787 rape in 2021, there were 4,520 underage minors who were victims, about fifty-eight-percent, more than half; the reports on the children’s rights found, that in the sexual assault cases in schools back in 2020, those from elementary school to high school age got up to 233 cases.

Chen said, the Human Rights Committee needed to try and figure out why these severe cases of child, adolescent sexual assaults are happening repeatedly, hoping to borrow the Australian government’s investigative means, to do the researches into the placement facilities of minors, and the sexual assaults occurring in the schools.

She’d told, that setting up the cases individually won’t get the whole picture of the problem with the systems, that the committee would focus on listening to the experiences of the victims, to find out the structural problems of what’s causing these sexual assaults, rapes in the minors, and work together with the government units to prevent the recurrences of these tragedies.

The member of the examination committee, Tien called the victims of child sexual assaults as “survivors”, she’d stated, that it would be nothing easy, for these victims to come out, that Australia had set up the funding of seven hundred million N.T.s and seven hundred employees to help achieve this, that Taiwan does NOT have this sort of resources, everything is hard at the beginning, but this must get started.

Chang pointed out, that the interview will start on the school level, the rape victims of the placement facilities first, the victims of the sex trade, even if the individuals are over eighteen, so long as they were assaulted as minors, they are all going to get interviewed, that the program will recruit the interviewees, and is planning on interviewing a hundred survivors face-to-face.

Yeah, this is a plan, that will, totally, NOT work, because who the FUCK that’s been raped, molested, abused sexually would be willing to, tell her/his stories to the public, to get SHAMED again, to RELIVE those traumas?  Yeah, nobody, that’s who, besides, this sort of things are personal to those who’d weathered through it, and, for most of us, we just want to, put it all behind us, soon as we are through, dealing with the events of these, traumas of our, younger years, so yeah, this is still, too ideal, so, good luck, on getting enough “sample” for the “pool” there, DDP!

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Filed under Abandonment of Children, Basic Human Rights, Childhood, Children Murdered, Idiocy, Life, Overcoming Obstacles, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Rapes, Re-Experiencing the Trauma, Reality Clashes with Dreams, Sexual Assaults, White Picket Fence

More than Tens of Thousands Supported the Specialized Two-Year-Old Classes, the Education Groups Objected to the Amendments of Mixing the Two-Year-Olds into the Preschool Classes

This is due to those, WHINY parents who needed to work, who can’t place their not-yet-preschool or kindergarten age children anywhere, and this is still, STUPID, not considering the developmental needs of the child!  The @#$%ED up policy of early childhood education that this government came up with, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The Department of Education is planning on opening up the first year of kindergarten for as young as three-year-old, and the early childhood groups started criticizing, suspected that if the government went forth with this policy, then, the two-year-old specialty classes would be totally, screwed up.  The All-Education Foundation gone to protest at the Department of Education, claimed, that within two days’ announcing the policies, there were, more than tens of thousand who’d signed the petitions to support the opening of the two-year-old specialty classes already, against the mixed-age of two year olds into the preschool classes, called out to the Department of Education to stop the amendment from passing.

In actuality, the two-year-old specialized classrooms has a totally different setting compared to the three-year-old only class, for instance, the toilets for the two-year-old classes need to be located in the back of the class, not for the threes.  The teacher-student ratio for the twos is one to eight, for the toddlers of first year kindergarten and up it’s one to fifteen, and there were the owners of the facilities who aren’t opening up the early childhood classes, due to the costs in hiring the extra certified early childhood educators.

The committee member of All Education Foundation of Child Education, Yang stated, that if the children under age three can get mixed into the three-year-old classes, then, does that mean, that five-year-olds are allowed into elementary school to learn.  The Department of Education should NOT open that door of convenience, just because it matched the needs of some of the operators of the early childhood programs.

The Department of Education stated, that this amendment merely allows for the chances of biological three-year-olds to be in the same classroom setting as the three yar old toddlers, that it would NOT be like having kids in various ages in the same classes.  And, if the schools are to have the classes, then, three mandates must be met including, the preschool not having a two-year-old only classes, or if the two-year-old classes are already, filled in enrollment, with the three-year-old classes still having the vacancies, and the toddler must be biologically three year old on the month of registration, then, the toddler can start schooling.

this mixed age group would work

I’m thinking…photo from online, because at least, the‘re, “roughly” the same ages.,,photo from online

And so, just like ALL other policies by the DDP, this is, still giving us the run-around, I mean, what the HELL is being biologically three, three years of age since the day we were born, but, what if, mentally, we’re still not yet, potty trained by then?  And, this mix age class is still just bullshit, I mean, surely, if you mix the four year-olds with the five, six year olds in a class, that would be okay, but, two is still, way too young, when they needed the individual attention, and besides, the teacher-to-student ratios are totally different for these age groups, so, what it adds up is, you’ll be having, 2.5 instructors (that’s still just made up by me!), and, where the HECK you gonna find HALF of a teacher, oh I know, you split the early childhood educators in HALF, then, place one half in the 2.5 teacher classroom, and, leave the remaining HALF of that instructor that’s gotten, hacked down the middle, inside the CLOSETS!

Yeah, that’s too stupid, I mean, if they’re older, sure, it might work, but not at that young and age…

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Filed under Child Development/Education of Children, Childhood, Education, Education Reforms, Perspectives, Reforms in Education, Stupidity, Wake Up Calls, White Picket Fence

It Was Me, Who Got Shattered, Like You, Had…

It was me, who got, shattered, like you, had, I just, didn’t know it then, but I know it now…

It was me, who got shattered, like you, had, and, you broke into, millions of bits and pieces, and, scattered your broken self, across my mind.  It was me, who got shattered, like you had, I just, didn’t know it then, I didn’t know, that I was, going to be like you, the victim of our, angers.

what became of, her, my porcelain of, long-ago…photo found online (this wasn’t my identical porcelain though…)

It was me, who got shattered, like you, had, and I know it now, and, I’m so sorry, for how you’d, “died” back when I was too young to even realize.  It was me, who got shattered, like you had, only, I shattered inside, while you’d, shattered, on the, out, and, as soon as you hit the marble floor, I knew, it was, too late, to save you.

Oh how I’d, cried, over you (did I now, can’t remember!), you were prettier than my other, porcelain, and, the thoughts of, had I only, thrown HER, instead of you, you would be, “alive” still, crawled into my mind.

But it was, too late, you’d already, “died”, at my childhood, hand, there was nothing I can do, but to, mourn for my loss of you, and of my own self too……………

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Filed under Childhood, Imaginative Play, Innocence Lost, Life, Perspectives, Properties of Life, The Doll Corner, Things Left Behind, White Picket Fence

Little Boy, Broken

Little boy, broken, nobody knew when, or how, he got found that way…

Little boy, broken, nobody can fix him back up, he’d been, injured, in too many places already, and those old wounds, they never, healed back up, at least, not, emotionally or, psychologically, as in, E-V-E-R!

Little boy, broken, there’s nothing we can do about that, he’d heard them saying, and he’d learned, to become, helpless over his situation, and in time, the helplessness became, anger, and he’d, turned his rage toward everybody who’s near him, drove EVERYBODY who actually cared about him, away.

what he, looked, like…

photo from online

Until his all alone, in that, darkness, deep down, inside, that hole inside his own mind.  Stuck in the abyss now, with NO way of getting out.

Little boy broken, picked his pieces up, mixed and matched, to make himself whole again, and yet, the pieces of his own truth went missing, they’d, escaped out of his mind, he’d searched high and low, but still not found.

Little boy broken finally grew up into man, and he’s now, a full grown, broken man, and just like how others had, broken him before, he too will now, break people too.

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Filed under Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Adult Children, Childhood, Life, Properties of Life, STUCK in a Cookie Jar, Vicious Cycle, Wake Up Calls

The Air, My Friend

All our, active, imaginations, getting, SLAUGHTERED, because of the “abundance” of access to high-tech gadgets, with internet access, at the tips of, all of, our, fingers, the column by Jimmi Liao, translated by me…

I’m Not Foolish Enough, to Go up to the Skies to Catch the Stars,

Nor am I, Stupid Enough, to Follow the Clouds Out Adrift,

I Will NOT Head Off to Space to that Exploration that Tires Me Out Completely.

 I Can Say This, Bravely, Loud & Clear:

“So Long as I Get to Stay at Home, Check Things Out Online on My Cell Phone,

I’ll Be, Happy as, a Clam!”

the artwork of Jimmi Liao, courtesy of UDN.com

And this would be, a MAJOR problem, the slaughtering of our, and the next generations’, active imagination, as the high-tech devices are now, taking OVER this god damn world, and, soon enough you will have those, itty, bitty, fetuses inside the wombs with a cell phone (or an iPad!), in those, tiny ten little finger when you go in to get your ultrasound or sonograms, and that’s still, too sad…

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Filed under Addiction to High-Tech Devices& the WWW, Child Development/Education of Children, Childhood, Life, Messed Up Values, Observations, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Wake Up Calls

What I Couldn’t, Recall, from Before…

What I couldn’t, recall, from before, it all came, flooding back, into my mind, too fast, I can’t, process them, and the dusts never, settled down fully, nothing was, calm, again!

What I couldn’t, recall, from before, why are they, all hitting me hard now?  Why do I need to, remember, all of these things of pain from my younger years, why can’t my mind, just, keep me, deceived, as it’d done before, huh?

difficulties accessing the memories locked inside the brains! Image from online

What I couldn’t, recall, from before, it’d all, come back out, of the darkness of my, unconscious, passing through the grays of the, subconscious, into, the consciousness that’s me!  What I couldn’t, recall, from before, they’re all coming back, one by one, a fact here, a fact there, several on a day, none on the next, too many to cope on the following day after that.

Until, until, everything that’s happened to me in the past, presented themselves, collectively, to me, inside, that, Pandora’s, box………

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Filed under Abandonment of Children, Abuse, Awareness, Childhood, Children Murdered, Domestic Violence, Innocence Lost, Life, Negligence, Properties of Life, Suppressed Memories

The Final Trial

Out of a book I’m reading, translated by me…

I would see the mothers and daughter holding intimate conversations from time to time.  They’d treated one another with respect, and as independent from each other, the mother didn’t treat the daughter as something she owned, maintained the distance, at the same time, still were able to, relate to one another intimately.  Every time I see this combination, I’d, felt envious.  To tell the truth, it’s something really nice.  For me though, my relationship with my mother consisted of the never-ending fights, sometimes, we’d, impacted one another hard, sometimes, we’d, ignored each other, and finally, I’m, to where I, currently am.  Back then, I’d wanted to leave home, to get married early, to want another family.  And yet, I’d come to understand, that I will find no place to belong in at a young age, so I’d, forced myself to become, independent.  And, from this perspective, my mother would be, awesome.

So, why did I have such a mother?  About a year ago, this question surfaced to my mind.  Because no matter what, children can’t choose their own parents, and, it’s this sort of a drawing by chance.  If you drew good parents, then, you’re blessed, and if you didn’t, you would be, tortured in life.

As the question started growing inside of my mind, I’d finally decided, to pay a visit to the fortune teller one afternoon.  I only needed to provide my date of birth, my place of birth, and my time of birth, then, the individual will be able to read my life.  I’d, originally, not believed such a thing, but this was, the only straw I can grab onto, to save myself.

Anything, anything at all, I just, needed a reason, for why I was, born to, this woman who was, my mother.

The fortune-teller told me, that I’d owed my mother a favor in a past life.  That’s it, I was, graced by my mother in another life?  And, it was, from a lifetime ago, there’s nothing I can do, and so, I’d, immediately, accepted the claims of that, fortune teller.  And, my mother being my mother, was also something, she’d lacked, control over.

The fortune-teller told me, that facing the trials right now, is the ultimate test of my spirit, if I passed, then, my soul will no longer need to get trapped in the cyclic karma, and I won’t come back as a human being again.

And of course, that was, that, a fortune-telling session, there was no way of me knowing for certain if it is true or false. But for me, even if it’s untrue, it’d helped me find the salvation I needed.  The words of the fortune-teller gave me that heart of ease now, and I can, better accept the problems I have with my own mother.

The most important gain from this session, was I now know, that I’m, tested by God right now, and, if I didn’t visit the fortune-teller as I’d done when I had, I may still be, living in a depressed mood every single day.

As my mother passed, in the current moment, my state of mind felt like that finally solved math problem.  Although, I’d not made the perfect scores still, but, at least, I’d, passed the exams.

And, this just showed, how we’re, often trapped by the whys of life, we want a valid reason, to make sense of why and how things happened the way that they had, and, this woman, she’d found the answer she was in need of (regardless of whether or not it’s true or false), that she’d found closure, to the awful relationship she’d always had with her own mother, and she’s, moving on with the rest of her life, leaving that baggage, behind, for she’d, carried it for too long, all the way up to the point in her life, and now, she’s finally, letting go.

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Filed under Abandonment of Children, Childhood, Life, Parent-Child Interactions, Parenting/Parenthood, Perspectives, Properties of Life