Category Archives: Philosophies of Life

Not as Easy as We’d, Imagined

A D.I.Y. fail!  Should’ve called in, the experts that’s for sure!!!  Translated…

That year, the new wash basin that I’d just had installed not a few days ago, due to my mistake, got three cracks on it, but it’s still, usable, and so, I’d not planned to, change it out.  Many years afterwards, I saw my five and two-and-a-half year-old grandsons, tipped their toes, reaching up to the basin to clean their hands, then suddenly, the news of the wash basin exploding that was on the news came to mind, and I’d, suddenly, decided to, get a new one installed.

To make work easier, I’d first gone to the depot, selected a basin that’s similar to the one I had originally in shape, color, style, made of plastic, and, thought to myself, I’d installed the tiles on my own floors, redid my own lanai, how hard can installing a wash basin be?  After I had breakfast, I’d immediately, gotten to it, but, I’d, HIT a DEAD wall then; the screw that originally attached my wash basin to the walls was rusted, and I can’t twist it off, the two of us started, using all our strengths, to try to pry it open, and, after forty minutes, still not budged one bit; it seems, there’s only the way, to SMASH the old basin up.

should’ve just, called in, a professional to do it!

查看來源圖片
photo from online

After we’d, swept up the floor’s worth of, debris, we’d started, tackling that rusty screw, and yet, as we’d, asked all our pliers out to help us, none can make the single screw budge, and so, we’d, started, sawing it off.  My husband found the saw first, then, the two of us took turns, bending our backs over, sawed at it with all our mights, we’d even, taken two rests, then, we finally, unscrewed, these, two screws, loose.

The hole that remained from the screws that were loose, can’t be used anymore, we needed to, drill, other holes.  There’s no drill at home that we can use, my wife went out to buy one.  The hole got made yeah, but I can’t, tighten the screws in completely, turned out, the whole on the right was drilled too deep, and so, we’d, made another new hole next to it, decided, to install that basin in.  And yet, as the screws are about to be placed in, we were shocked, to realizing, that the sizes and types that we bought wasn’t, unified, and so, my wife can only, run out, to get the right screw.

And finally, as all is about to get done, the basin was, too far from the wall, because of how that hole on the left was, deep enough, and we’d had to, pull out the plastic plugs again, then, drilled, deeper in.  But, no matter how my wife pulled at it, the plug simply, wouldn’t, budge, I’d gone closer to look, “You need to whack it, hitting around it a bit, and, it should, loosen up?”, and surely enough, as I’d, whacked at it a couple of times, the plastic plug came out, but, it’s, broken, and so, my wife went out again.

And finally, everything’s set, now, the step by step clean up.  The pipe’s ruptured, I’d needed to, replace the new one, but, I’d, fumbled through FIVE tool boxes that I owned, not a single one that can be used.  Waited until my wife bought the replacement parts, the two of us, with glee, started on, the final step: reattaching the pipe back on, and yet, at this time, I’d found, that there were FOUR holes on the pipe, totally needed to be, replaced, so, my wife went out, again, and bought back a set of shiny brass, P-pipe.

And, as all of this is done, I’d looked at the clock, five o’clock, sharp.  Can’t believe, that this, “simple” changing a wash basin took the two of us, an entire, day!

A lot of things in life, are way HARDER, than you can, ever imagined, like this gig that these two people got into, they should’ve just, called in the professional plumbers, but they didn’t want to waste all that cash, and so, they did it themselves, and, they got it done finally all right, but it took them, a WHOLE, workday, and to think, that had they called in the professionals, it may have been done, in, no more than, thirty minutes, but they wanted to save the money, and they ended up, squandering away the time!

So totally, NOT worth it, is what I say!

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Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Cause & Effect, Cost of Living, Expectations, Lessons, Life, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Socialization, Translated Work

Learning Music After Retirement, & Having Fun Doing it

The importance of how learning is an ongoing process, the need for a hobby to be established after retirement age, translated…

As children grow up, my mother in her sixties decided to pick up on her dreams when she was younger: taking up the music lessons.  She’d not just signed up for the electric piano classes at the community center, she’d, disregarded my father’s objections, signed HIM up for the sax lessons.  Seeing how the two bought their instruments, and as time for the classes came, they’d, rushed out, packed the big and small packs to take along, and naturally, as children, we are, most, supportive of them.

Then ever since as I’d come back home on the weekends or holidays, I’d, heard music, “floating in the air”—for the players of recorder in the music classes, I’m sure, that we can all agree, that the sound that came out as beginners played, isn’t musical.  As the cat heard the music started, sounding off, it’d, scattered away, quick, with that look of, “What did I do to deserve this” on its face.  But, my father has a serious nature, and on occasions, he’d complained about how my mother “made” him go to class, but he’d still, picked up the sax every day and, started from the basics of blowing air between the reeds, making the sounds, and, playing the simple notes, and each practice session runs for over two hours at a time.  To not bug the neighbors, my father would hide inside the bathrooms, shut the doors and the windows as he’d practiced inside the loo.

And my mother, who’d, started all of this, wouldn’t be beaten by my father, she’d taken the piano for several months, and, at her instructors recommendations, she’d started playing the flute.  The sax and the flutes are both woodwind instruments, but, the sax sounded fuller, while the flute sounded, like floating in the air, the two instruments go on and off inside the house, and it’d, made the listeners, uneasy, but the cat didn’t mind, as my mother sat herself down to play, it’d hopped onto my mother’s knees, and, lay down, sometimes, the cat would, stare, deep into my mother’s eyes, like he was enjoying this sound that’s, at the same frequency of his, meowing.

illustration from UDN.com

圖/想樂

As my mother got into playing, she’d, poured her heart and soul into it, and she’d, complained to us on how she’d, hit a fork in her practice sessions.  Until one day, she’d shared with me excitedly, that her high school instructor started playing the flute when she was seventy, and, she’d continued playing, and she’s having a decade recital soon, that she will, follow her teacher’s, lead too, she’d found herself a private lesson instructor, from the pop music, she’d, advanced to the classical.  The teacher was demanding of the aperture, and I’d seen my mother focusing on sticking her tongue out, with her mouth open.

And, after awhile, the cacophony became, less and less, I can already, sit quite, settled in, in the living room, as my mother played the flute, sometimes, I’d, closed my eyes, and imagined the poetic verses as I listened to her play.  While my father favorite tune, “Amazing Grace” started with amazing, and now, there’s, the grace “factor” that’s, included in too.  Being an avid learner, he’d not only satisfied in reading the simplified sheet music, he’d even started, picking up my old sheet music, and learned to read the notes off the staff.

As our family gathered for the New Year’s this year the two of them put on a show, and, gotten a full applause from all around the room.  I can’t help but feel in awe, no matter how old you are when you started pursuing your dreams, it’s never too late.  Your lives are, fulfilled, you can find friends who shared the same interests, and it helps activate your mind, to slow down the process of aging, and it gives you that sense of achievement too.  My mother also testified, that picking up the piano was a breakthrough for her, that was the very first time she’d ever, chosen to take the lessons seriously, and knew, that she could, do it!  As we were growing up, being forced to sit at the piano to play was torture for us, but, as my parents got older, started picking up on the instruments, they’d not only, entertained themselves, but us too!

And so, this, is the right attitude that we should all carry, when we pick up on something, like these two older adults, and, maybe it’s because of their mindsets being, more matured, nobody’s pushing them to learn the musical instruments, they’d picked it up on their own, that was why they’re, able to, play it with so much joy.

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Filed under Because of Love, Hobbies/Pasttimes, Life, Observations, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Socialization, Translated Work, Values

A Lifelong Hobby

It’s NEVER good, to PUSH your children into something, instead, you should, allow them, to discover just how much they love that hobby you want them to take up, on their own, and, don’t force them to sit down at that piano, to practice for an hour each and every day, because that’s, torture, instead, allowing them, to discover their own hobby, by themselves, slowly, if they’re, mean to, translated…

After reading the writer, Tseng’s “Meeting Up Again with the Piano” on March 4th, it’d, made me recall my childhood memories, and extended into my current days.

My mother was an elementary school teacher, in the low wages of the fifties, she’d, squeezed out the tuitions, or us to go from the countryside of Chihshan to Kaohsiung to take piano lessons, and told us we all needed to sit at the piano and practice for an hour at least per day.

Being as young as we were, how would we know our parents’ hearts, in the three, four years of lessons, going to the piano teacher’s house was like going to the guillotine, I’d, hated it but not known, how to, rebel against it.

The pressures of keep going in my academic WAS, a great excuse for not taking the piano lessons anymore, seeing how my eldest and second eldest brother entering into the middle school years, getting away from the “guillotine”, and I, the only one who remained in the torture chambers.  This day had, finally, arrived, before the schools started in my middle school year, as the piano teacher played a new song for me, I’d told him, “I’ll be starting in middle school soon, I can’t take lessons with you anymore!”, seeing how shocked my piano instructor looked, I’d felt, that I’d, made my, revenge!

查看來源圖片
a child that looks, engaged…photo from online

During the summer of my second year in middle school, a group of us gone to a classmate’s home to hang, there was, a white grand piano in the room, and the group of us, started, tapping at the keys, I’d, followed the sheet music, and played the notes on it, and, I was shocked, that this easy to play piece had, brought out, that familiar, tune, and I’d, borrowed the sheet music, took it home to practice, the piece was, “Fur Elise”, as my second eldest brother who was in high school heard me played, he’d, sat down next to me and started playing too.

Because of the foundations of piano lessons lain earlier in my life, we’d found the sheet music we liked and started, playing again, from the classical to jazz, and, when we got into it, we would have a four-hand playing.  We’d played on, for decades, and it’d become, a hobby that we keep, for life now, from before, we’d not wanted to take the lessons, using our academic stresses as an excuse, and, later we’d realized, that in a lot of the times, piano playing, is a good method of, stress-relief.

And, naturally, I’d, wanted to, pass this, gift to my own young, a decade ago, when my daughter was in the elementary years, I’d, coaxed her onto the piano bench, with my own experience in childhood, I knew better, not to force it on her, that I’d had to, give her the rewards too.  My daughter wasn’t the talented sort, to help her continue learning the piano, I’d, carefully, guided her, sometimes, I’d, not forced her to play, to practice, and at others, I’d, told her she’d, needed to sit down and play for a while.

And finally, we’d, made it through, six whole years, and she had, all her fundamentals down pat, just about, and I’d, sat with her on the four-hand piano, and, before the pressures that is about to come toward her at the end of her last year of middle school, I’d decided, to end her lessons, and gave her a “graduation ceremony”, I’d told her, “this is the end of my demands for you to play the piano, from here on out, you get to decide, whether or not YOU want to, play.”

And, surely enough, I’d not, seen her, sit down on the piano bench since, and, three years flew by, at the start of this year, I’d heard her telling me that she’d wanted to, “practice my skills back again.”, I can’t, believe my ears.  Yet, it’d been, two whole months, past her high school entrance exams, and I’d not heard, a single note yet, I’d, told myself, don’t expect too much.

Several days ago, as I came home from outside, before I’d turned the keys, I’d already, heard the piano songs, coming out of the living room, and I’d felt, moved……………

So, this still just showed, how as parents, we should, NEVER force our own dreams onto our young, we may give them lessons, if they ask us to let them learn, but, we shouldn’t, FORCE them to play the musical instrument, I mean, they’re still young children, and children, have limited attention span, and forcing them to SIT down for hours to practice the songs, it’s just, too unrealistic, and, this may end up, slaughtering the love your children had originally, of music, and have the opposite effect of what you’d, hoped to give to them.  If they’re meant to pick it back up again, then they will.

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Filed under Child Development/Education of Children, Hobbies/Pasttimes, Life, Parent-Child Interactions, Parenting/Parenthood, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, The Education of Children

The Air, My Friend

The column by Jimmi Liao, translated, by me, again………

Even in the Jurassic Age,

Bringing a Bouquet of Flowers to a Date is a Must.

illustration by Jimmi Liao, off of UDN.com

圖/幾米

Some things, don’t change, the common courtesies, that first impression that you’d made on someone, and this is still all from, socialization.

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Filed under Expectations, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Socialization

A Lovable Elderly Person

An elderly who refused to get beaten by old age, staying independent, and optimistic through life, an example for all of us, younger generations, translated…

Grandma Wang is 106 this year, she is my mother’s best fri4end, watched me from when I was a toddler, to becoming, a grandmother myself, after my mother passed, every once in a while, I’d, gone to visit her.  The neighbors who grew up with me from way back would also, go visit her as well, to comfort her, who didn’t have any children.

At first, I think we were visiting Grandma Wang because of transference.  Because our own mothers passed, and we don’t have any sense of belonging any more, and Grandma Wang was my mother’s, best friend, and being around her, it’d made me feel like I was with my mother again.

But, why would I, get motivated, comfortably, without any pressures, to go visit with her?  Or maybe, it was, the lack of the pressures, that sense of gratitude, catching on with the times, that’s, made her, very amicable.

She’d not, pressured us to go visit her more, and, not thought of, how long ago was it since we’d, last come, nor would she just, sit at home, and wait for us to visit; as we’d, visited, and when we are going off, she’d not let me feel guilty about not spending enough time with her.  And, no matter if we’d brought her clothing, daily necessities, or run the errands for her from time to time, she’d, taken our acts graciously, and, thanked us verbally repeatedly.

And, even though, in my minds, she wasn’t, lucky enough, because her husband died young, she didn’t have any children, and can only live off of the government’s low income sustenance, but she’d always told, of how blessed she was.

Or maybe she’d known, that she couldn’t rely on anyone, it’d, helped her become, the more, independent.

She has failing sight, couldn’t watch T.V. or read the books or the papers, and so, she’d, listened to the radio, no matter if it’s the topics on politics, finance, or social matters, she could carry on in conversation with us.  She can’t stand too long, couldn’t go out for strolls, and she’d, used the tables and chairs to steady herself, and, exercised inside her house, or did the exercises with her arms, and she’d, told us, to move around more if we want to live well.  Everything she could do on her own, she’d not requested anybody to help her, and she’d always, found things to do on her own too, that it helped her pass the time.  Sometimes, as I’d gone to visit, she was, chopping up the fillings of the dumplings.

It no wonder, that other than us, the man in charge of the local borough also loved paying her visits, as well as the personnel of the social welfare programs too, to carry on in conversations with her.  While my husband and I would often remind each other, that we need to follow her lead in our old age.  Becoming an independent, self-made, gracious, grateful, elderly whom others loved being around.

And so, what helped this elderly person to be loved by others around her in life is her temperament, how despite how she had the conditions that came with her elderly years, she’d still, worked hard, to live her life to the fullest, not relying on anyone, staying, as independent as she possibly can, and, it’s her means to living her life, that’s, drawn all the members of the younger generations to her.

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Life, Observations, Old Age, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Self-Images

Seven Games to Play with Your Young Children to Help Them Develop a Stronger Concentration

Games that helps aid the development of your young children’s cognitive processes, so, play with them more, and come up with other sorts of games that can stimulate your children’s brains, from the experts, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

With more and more, emphasis, placed on child development, birth to age three is the key development period, what ways, do we have, of helping the children develop their sense of, concentration?  The child occupational therapist, Yu suggested seven games at home, to play with your children to help them develop stronger concentration.

First, the musical singing song game, Yu said, playing the music that your young children liked, like Baby Shark, Head and Shoulders Knees and Toes, etc., etc., and do the simple movements with your children, it’s good for their concentration.  Beading, stacking up the blocks, then, aiming at the blocks, knocking them down are also great games.

games like this…

查看來源圖片
photo from online

Wait until the child understand the simple commands, have the child role-play as the “delivery person”, to bring the items to the parents, Yu said, place the obstacles like toys that obstruct their paths, have your children step over them, and tell them not to knock the items in their ways over, to not “tip over the foods”; wait unit your children are older yet, have them find specific items out of a stack, deliver it you.

Hide-and-Go-Seek is also a game that trains the child in concentration.  Yu stated, that the parents can first, hide the dolls underneath the quilts, and showing only the legs of the dolls for the child to find, and in a more advanced version of the game, have the child find the socks, “where’s the red sock?”, or “Where’s the sock with the car on it?”

Yu most recommended that the parents and children read along together, she said, find the books with the pictures primarily, let the kids see what shapes are in the books, for instance, in a book of illustrated animals, turn to a page, have the child tell what animals are on the page, where’s the rabbit, find the dog, have your child point it out to you.

or this…

查看來源圖片
photo from online

The clinical psychologist, Lee said, before age three, the diagnoses of attention-deficit, or hyperactivity are hard to diagnose, the researches showed, that the high-tech devices with the loud volumes of sounds and the bright lights are, harmful to the development of your children, that there should be a limit of half an hour a day of use per day.

And so, due to the prevalence of the diagnoses of ADD, ADHD these days, we must, be careful, WHAT we’re, exposing our young children to, after all, children DO, model after the adults, and, the games of stacking up the blocks, classification of the various kinds of toys, these games trains your young children in their, cognitive development processes.

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Filed under Child Development/Education of Children, Childhood, Life, Parent-Child Interactions, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, The Education of Children

Helping the Mothers Return Back to the Workforce, a Company was Set up to Match Their Skills

This is a program, that helps women, get OUT of the, traditional gender roles, to help them find work outside the homes, off of the Newspapers, translated…

The Der-Jen Human Resources Agency’s goal is to “help moms find work”; the founder of the program, Tsai saw a lot of women her age, because they had children, and after they took their maternity leaves, it’d become, harder for them, to return back to the workforce.  As she’d set up an independent agency, helping the women to have a friendly work environment, that they can take care of their families, as well as work at the same time, and her company received the “Enterprise Friendly Work Environment Contributions” award.

“What we’re doing may not bring in the big bucks, but, it’s, more than, meaningful!”, Tsai stated, that their workspace is put together with the desks, and the employees don’t need to follow the strict work schedules of nine to five, the flexibility of workhours allowed the employees to have more freedom, “the company is an example of allowing women to not get limited by the time of work in the offices, nor working in a specific space, and they can, all shine still”.

Tsai originally worked in the high-tech industries, in 2016, she’d given up on her high pay job, and set up a company on her own.  With only eight employees, and the objective of her company was to help match the female workers with the fitted workplaces fitted to their needs, the members of the families had the need of caretaking, and needed to go to and from work and home quite a lot, needed the flexible workhours, also, the balances of home and work too; and there were those women who’d left the workforces for way too long, lacked the self-confidences, and aren’t professional enough in their skillsets, they’d all needed the help.

Tsai told, that “combining the work and the families’ needs” was her original thought when she set up her company, “Der-Jen” is also the first human resources company that promoted the flexible work schedule in all of Taiwan, and called itself a social enterprise; from the very beginning of her company being set up, the hardships that they endured, most of the enterprises were all doubtful toward the “homemakers” returning back to the workforce, from the communications, the education, currently, the foundation offers about 3,000 women who are looking to return to work after they had their children.

得人資源整合公司推廣友善職場,替媽媽們媒合能彈性工作的企業。圖/得人資源整合公司提供
so women can work, and take care of their children at the same time! Photo from UDN.com

The Der-Jen Human Resources recently combined workforces with the academic units, and started up the forum of setting up a friendlier environment for working mothers, and complied with the government’s program of “Women Returning to the Workforce”, designed many courses, to help reconnect the women with their going back to work, and it’d, set up the human resources classes for the private enterprises too; Tsai hoped to design a more flexible work schedule for women all around.

Making the Work Environment Friendlier, Tsai: What I’m Doing is Meaningful

Tsai worked in the technology industries for more than a decade’s time, she had already been promoted to a managerial position, and her career is on the rise, but as she’d found, that other women around her, due to getting married, starting their families, giving up on their dreams, and the achievements they get from work, leaving their stable workforces, and their wages, she’d pushed forth a friendly environment for mothers.

“People’s choices are related to their personality traits!”, she’d said, in the technology field she’d worked in the “innovations, and the most advanced” job, including before the government’s expansion southbound, she’d led the workers in her company to expand her company to Southeast Asia, to going into the 3-Dimension printing, the resources shopping sites.  But being creative in her thoughts, and with that strong sense of justice, she’d slowly wondered, “are the technologies working in helping people live better, or are they, controlling, our behaviors?”, and she’d started, having a different belief system.

In 2012 in a chance encounter, Tsai came into contact with “social enterprise”, she was in the midst of contemplating wanting to do something meaningful, and, she’d, matched to the programs perfectly, in the end, she’d left the technology industries, and set up a similar social enterprise, the Der-Jen Human Resources Agency.

Tsai told, that as she got deeper in, she’d found, that the matter of gender in the workforces is quite, complicated, in the process of helping, she saw the stories of others unravel before her eyes, and it’d, helped her accumulated the experiences, and felt, that she’d become, a source of power that can, help the society move forward.  She said, “the various people in their various positions, playing their roles well, finding how each can contribute to the society, I’m really glad, to have found the work I really enjoy doing, that’s also, meaningful too.”

And so, this, is a good program, that this woman set up, to help mothers who left the workforce to have children, who wanted to, return back to work again, as the work environment usually isn’t that friendly toward women who’d had children, and most of the enterprises would think twice before they hire mothers, because of how the mothers needed to consider the welfare of their own children, and this woman’s agency, is set up, to help the women find the jobs that can help them do both: work to bring in the pays, and to take care of their young.

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Filed under Life, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Women's Issues

A Beautiful , Yet Sad Story, Love in the Schooling Years

The love that didn’t get spoken in time, the love that passed on, with the death of that someone you liked in your, schooling years, and what his death had, taught you, translated…

One Day, I’d, Opened up My Closet, and No Matter How Hard I’d, Looked, I Just, Couldn’t, Find Those, Two Shirts, and because They’re of My Personal Collections, I’d, Not Dared Made it Open, Nor Asked Anyone, I can Only, Pull Out All the Clothes, and Prodded with My Hands, Inside that, Emptied, Drawer………………

I Just Want to Grab onto Something, a Strand of What was Left Was, Fine

My first love came to a halt, in an accident, that boy I liked in my second year of middle school, before we had the chance to exchange a single word with one another, vanished, without, a single, trace.

I was only fourteen, had absolutely NO clue of how the universe worked, I looked all around me, and saw, nothing, but the fogs, and so, I’d felt, that strong sense of helplessness, over this world which I’d originally, had a firm grasp over, I’d, wanted to, extend my hand outward, and fish around, for something, anything!

I was, close to the boy’s younger sister, she’d, worked her best, to sort through everything that her older brother had, left behind, in the countryside of Kaohsiung, everybody was living in poverty stricken means, they seem to be worse off than we were, and, what she could give me were, a couple of blurry photographs, two of her older brother’s shirts, and, the textbook that seemed to have never been, flipped through by him.

I’d carried these things as if they were, something, precious, with tentativeness and care, I’d, stashed the photo inside my diary, and, folded his clothes up to tiny, placed them to the depth of my own closet, and, I’d, read through all the pages of his textbooks thoroughly.  Back then, I’d already, read a ton of, novels, and among these, were the romances, and I’d, stubbornly held on to the beliefs of: he liked me, although just like me, he’d, never said aloud, btu he must’ve, stashed that feeling inside his heart, and, written some lines about it.

I can’t know his heart anymore, but, who knows, if he’d, only, written something inside the texts, as he’d drifted into space in class?

The summers in Kaohsiung, those, never ending, summer days, came together in a bundle, in front of the window, in the sunlight, I’d, flipped through the volumes page by page, Chinese, history, math, geography……………the class of loose students, there was only the difference of the colors of the pages being pure white, and yellow.  The schemata which were, activated in my mind, and for every horizontal stroke of pen, I’d, immediately believed that it was the first stroke of my own last name; and yet, the young boy didn’t even leave a dot of his ballpoint pen.

And so, I can only, return all his textbooks, to the past.

And so, what remained, of my first love, were the two shirts, three photos, a newspaper clipping of how two middle school boys drowned by the oceans, along with that locked diary, crawling with my handwriting ink.

No Blackhole, Nor Boy in Hiding

One day, I’d opened up my closet, and can’t find those two shirts no matter how hard I’d tried, and because they’re, my private stash, I’d not dared, asked anybody, and can only, pull all the clothes out, and, prodded into the drawers now emptied, with my own hands, that maybe, there was, a blackhole inside, that swallowed everything that didn’t belong; or maybe, there’s, that secret tunnel in the back of my wardrobe, that the boy didn’t die, he’s, just, hiding, and, came in the middle of the nights, to pull his own shirt away, wanting to tell the girl: hey, I’m still here, in some corner of this world.

Then, the diary I’d kept at the bottom of my desk drawer, seemed to have moved around, I’d taken it out to look, the locks were cut off, and the photo, the newspaper clippings, all gone, and the smeared pages I’d written down as I cried, were all, torn off, perfectly.

Okay, okay, there was, NO blackhole, no mystery, no boy hidden, the one who’d, wiped it all away was, my mother.

My homeroom instructor must’ve called my parents about this, and in the heat of anger, my mother swept up my room, got rid of everything that she deemed as obstacles in my life, everything I’d, hold too dearly to my mind.

illustration from UDN.com

圖/Emily Chan

For the first few years, the boy was buried in that tiny cemetery in the bamboo forest, in the middle of the fields, then after the bones were collected, the headstone removed, then, the fields, the bamboo forest got turned into a huge, construction site, then, the concrete jungle came atop, there’s no place for me, to remember him then.

Then, what I wrote, it will do, right.  I’d written everything into a novel on BBS, and everybody liked it, it’d reminded the readers of everything in their own, younger, years, I’d even, published it, sold many copies too, but a few years, the book became, out-of-print, and, forgotten, by the, world then.

So, everything with a set form, disappear eventually, no matter how hard you’d tried to hold on, that handful of sand still, slips out.  I’d prodded these past two years, even the parents of the boy had both, passed on, and, those who’d remembered the guy’s smile, got reduced by two more people, will we all, not leave, anything behind, one day, just spreading out palms out?

No, maybe, there’s, something that’s, evolved, and now, I’d not rummaged through my daughter’s closets, drawers, or read her diaries anymore, to not throw away anything she’d, stashed away in secret.

To protect someone’s complete forms of her/his youth, that was, what that boy who’d died too young had, given to me, a life-long, gift.

And so, this lesson from this boy you liked who’d died, taught you a lesson with his death, that love is precious, that you must, take a hold of the love you want to hold onto in the now, otherwise, it will, slip away too quickly, and, you’d also, learned to, NOT read your own teenage daughter’s diary, to let her have her private things, that only she is aware of, because your mother didn’t respect your things!

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Filed under Because of Love, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Loss, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, the Finality of Life, The Teenage Years

I See, a Poem

As we’re, about to, die…translated…

Death, Should be a Healthy & Joyous, Journey Away,

Without the Physical Forms, Playing on Time Lightly.  But, Would You be, Willing to, Go?

The Soul Arrives First at a Place Called Dreaming

Waiting

The Body Walked Closer, on that Forked Road

Hesitant.  Whatever Came to Mind, Appeared; Whatever was Call Aloud Echoed Back

As You Wake, You Found Yourself, Still, Lying on the Hospital Bed

Sunken, in Your Own, Illnesses, Hearing the Conversation of Blood & Resting, in Peace

查看來源圖片
shadowing, over our lives…sketch from online

The Sudden Cough Blocked Out the Phlegm, I Saw

The Bones, Broken by the Coughs, Piercing Through the Flesh

The Voice that Signified Anger Toward the Pains Came Out

Slowly, Vanishing in-Between What You Can’t Lost

There’s a Smear of Blood in the Lighting of the Hallways of the Hospital

A Thin, Naked Man, Held Himself Tightly, as He is, Wheeled, Out of the Treatment Room

A Few Male Nurses Hovered All that’s Remained, the Clothes,

And I See

The Moaning of Time Following Outside, with Tears Streaming Down its, Face

And so, this, is what old age, the ill, the hospital, the terminal wards looked like, there’s always the shadows of death, lurking around, each and every hospital room, and staying in the hospital is that feel of unease, because we don’t know, when death is, coming to, claim us…

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Filed under Life, On Death & Dying, Philosophies of Life, Poetry, Properties of Life, the Finality of Life

Karaoke Sing-Off of the Elderly

A common activity, a hobby of sorts, shared by this group of, elderly in the community, translated…

The afternoon sun felt, warmed, I took the white poodle that belonged to the elderly woman downstairs out for a walk at the park.  As I strolled, I’d heard the voices singing.  Taiwanese, Hakka, Japanese, Mandarin.

I’d followed the voices curiously, found that there was a blue pickup parked under the tree at the entrance of the park, with the karaoke machine on it.  And there were, many elderly accompanied by their nurses in wheelchairs there, extending their necks, longing to have a good karaoke session.  They’d started blurting aloud the titles of the songs, and the young owner of the truck made the selections for them, each song costs only, ten-dollars, with everybody taking turns.

like this…

查看來源圖片
photo from online

All the elders were smiling and grinning from ear to ear, with the mic to their lips, and one of them, half way through the song, stated, “oops, forgot the lyrics!”, and one sang for two lines, then, “the key is too high, I can’t get up there!”, an elderly gent ordered a classic Taiwanese tune, “Pillows of Two”, and after a few lines, he’d sighed, “the pillow fell to the floors!”

And, even though, there were, the multitudes of actions, everybody still laughed and got along joyously.  Thinking about how these elders were, immobile, they have only limited place to hang out, the karaoke set up on the truck allowed them to get their voices heard, to get what they feel out, and clearly, this was, worth, more than, any materials.  As for whether or not they were excellent as singers, it wouldn’t, matter.  After all, they are not, professional singers, at their age, willing to open up their mouths to sing, it’s, worth, a lot, isn’t it?

And so, this, is the hobby that’s, shared by this, group of, elderly, and it’s, a very important, socialization forum for them, because these elderly are in wheelchairs, or immobilized, and they’re mostly kept indoors, but, there’s this service provided for them, to hang out together, to sing along together, it’s something wonderful, that the older generations can share.

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Filed under Hobbies/Pasttimes, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life