The “war” is on, between a mother and a daughter-in-law, translated…
I’d often heard my married colleagues told of the problems that they’d had, getting along with their mothers-in-law, and I’d felt that both sides had valid points, that they’d only have the differences of opinions, causing both sides to feel at a disadvantage.
My coworker, A, lived away from home since she’d started working, normally, she’s not too active in the house, with the chores, but she believed that there’s order in her mess, that she knew where everything is, but, unfortunately, she’d married into the house where the mother-in-law is a neat freak. Gladly though, the mother-in-law never imposed her ideals on her, and would help her tidy up, but A didn’t feel grateful, instead, she’d felt that her privacy had been invaded, and she didn’t know where everything had been stored in, it’d troubled her very much. She’d once asked her mother-in-law to not pick up after her, but the neat-freak personality that her mother-in-law had would not change, especially after A’s child was born, she’d asked things to be even neater, and, this problem had caused A to get furious, even after many years of marriage.
My coworker, B, was originally a name-brand worshipper, after she’d married and had children, she’d gotten worse on her spending habits, everything that the child uses, must be bought from the department stores, unfortunately though, her mother-in-law believed that this, was a waste of money, that they should save up on more money, like how quickly the children would grow, so, it should be fitting, that her kids take the relatives’ children’s hand-me-downs. But B couldn’t accept her mother-in-law’s view points, and, their interactions froze up.
My colleague, C, is a girl who’s strict on sanitations, she didn’t have much troubles, getting along with her in-laws, there is only thing that she’d kept piped down, that every time they’d eaten together, her mother-in-law would use her own chopsticks, to take the foods out of the serving dishes to give to C. And since C was younger, she’d been raised, that there’s an extra pair of chopsticks, for the use of everybody, even though she knew that her mother-in-law’s heart was in the right place, however, she’d felt offended because of sanitary issues, she’d felt troubled, and, she could only reduce the number of times she’d eaten out with her in-laws, to reduce the frictions.
Actually, a lot of ladies would find that their habits are quite different from their in-laws’, but, the older generations had already kept their habits for a long time, it would be unlikely, for the in-laws, to act, according to the daughters-in-law’s wishes; and all one can do, is to adjust one’s own mind, and, if the minor differences had caused great discords in the family, then, it would be so not worth it.
These, are the minor differences we have, like how someone would drop their socks next to their shoes as they’d gotten home, and someone else would quickly put those worn socks inside the laundry baskets, and, they may get into argument over something so minute, and, it’s still NOT a matter of right, it’s just a matter of differences in habits, and, by marrying, you MUST learn to adapt, and adjust your own mindsets.
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