The Time that’s, Stopped, on Those Walls…

The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, do you not see it, how the clock turned DEAD at a quarter ‘til???

The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, what does it signify? That time hadn’t moved on, but, we surely, had, ‘cuz, we are, no longer who we were, a minute ago, and, nothing’s, ever gonna be, the same again!

like this???  Old, and broken?  Photo from online…

The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, how can we, make them restart again? If only, it’s, simple as, changing those dead, used-up batteries! The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, and now, the minute, hour, and second hands, they all, started, us down, like those, bright and shiny eyes, in the darkened corners of the nights.

The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, it’d felt, too surreal, like, everything and nothing was, exactly, the same, and yet, it’s, somehow, different, you know? The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, we walked by that wall, with that DEAD clock, every day, as a reminder, of what? I can, no longer, recall now………

The time that’s, stopped, on those walls, they can’t, restart again, can they? It wouldn’t be, as simple as, changing the batteries on that clock, because, even IF the machine starts to work again, nothing will ever be, the same as it had been, or was, once!

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These, Bruised Dreams…

Reality had, started, using DREAMS, as its, PUNCHING B-A-G!!!

And, before we all knew it, these dreams, they’d become, so bruised to, beyond RECOGNITION already…These bruised dreams, what are we supposed to do with them now? They’re, NO longer perfect (compared to in the beginning, when we’d, dreamt them all up, before reality started, KICKING their ASSES???), and, we don’t want, ANY sort of imperfections, appearing, in our dreams, do we? So yeah, we’d, tossed them out, along with the TRASH, on Monday mornings, for the collectors to, pick ‘em all up, and, recycle them.

like this???  Doesn’t, look pretty, does it???  Of course N-O-T, not my photo…

These bruised dreams, maybe, we should, keep them ‘round, who knows, the bruises on them, may eventually, be gone, and they’d all be, good as new again, won’t they? And, tossing them all away, wouldn’t it be risky? After all, it’d taken us, long enough, to finally, start seeing these dreams, slowly, coming true in our lives, and, we shouldn’t just, toss them all away, because of those, itty, bitty, bruises that’s now, startin’, to show, should we???

These bruised dreams, even AS they’d, made their, complete recoveries, they will, NEVER be the same again, because, these dreams will, NEVER get, returned, BACK to the time, before they got, those, blue, green, purplish, bruises, coverin’ up, ALL their, “bodies”………

what reality is doing to dreams, EVERY second of, every day of our lives…illustration from online…

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Parents Were Dodging the Collectors, Abandoned Their Two Young Sons, and Found Guilty of Abandonment

The SELFISH ACTS of these parents, but then again, if we can’t save ourselves, how the F*** (maxed out???) can we possibly save our own young, right??? From the Front Page Sections, translated…

A woman, Shen who has a teashop in Wanhwa owes over millions of dollars in debt, because she could no longer withstand the collectors coming repeatedly to her home to collect, she’d escaped home, and two days later, her husband “ran away from home” to, leaving only the Indonesian nurse’s aide, with their twin eight-year-old sons with cerebral palsy. The Taipei District Attorney’s Offices believed that the twins weren’t capable of taking care of themselves on their own, they’d charged the couple with abandonment.

The D.A.’s investigations showed, that Sheng (age 52) had monetary and debt difficulties, and last June, the collectors came repeated to her home to collect, she was pressed, she’d taken the time when the Indonesian nurse’s aide went out to pick her twin sons from school, and escaped to the south to dodge the collectors.

Two days later, her husband, the elderly Su (age 72) also followed suit, and while the Indonesian nurse’s aide went to school to pick up the two young sons, he’d, made his way to his relatives in Hsinbei City to hide out. And, the nurse’s aide waited until midnight, and still no signs of him and his wife, she’d, immediately, notified the police; the police notified the Hsinbei Social Services Department to step in.

The social workers found, that this family was listed as a high-risk family a long time ago, plus the Indonesian nurse’s aide’s term was about to be up, and needed to leave Taiwan, they’d needed to place the twins quickly; the couple had an active arrest warrant out on them by the police, and, after the few months of on the run, they were, finally, caught.

As Sheng was taken in by the police, she’d claimed, that because she couldn’t pay her debts, the collectors kept coming to collect, and she was at her wit’s ends, so she ran; she thought that her husband would, take care of their twin sons, and didn’t guess, that her husband would, escape home like she had too; and the elderly, Su claimed, that there was still the Indonesian aide left at home to look after their sons, that it didn’t, constitute as abandonment.

Based off of understanding, in the time that they were dodging the collectors, they didn’t have any contact with one another.

The D.A. pointed out, that after Su made his escape, and although there was the Indonesian hired help, but she’s not the legal guardian or the caretaker legally, and her work visa was about to expire, and she’d needed to leave, and believed, that the couple’s behaviors constitute as abandonment.

And see, how SELFISH these two god DAMN adults were! They’d just, left home, because they couldn’t take whatever the F*** (maxed out???) they started, and left the nurse’s aide, all alone at home, to take care of their two handicapped children, and if that’s not irresponsible, I don’t know what is!

 

 

What? I’m Korean!

Finding out why, and, letting go of that feeling of being betrayed, realizing, that what the adults in your life did, was what they thought was, best for you, translated…

Ever since I could recall, I’d lived alone, with my mother in Korea, we’d never spent, a day apart. Later, I’d come to Taiwan to study, to marry, to have children, and settled down in Taipei, with my mother there, by my side. But, shortly after she passed, my former classmates from Korea sent me a weird news: there were, a couple of Koreans who were, desperately, searching for me, and claimed that they were, my relatives.

How’s that possible? Am I, zoomed in, by the international scam artists?

From before when there was only a small circle of Asians we’d associated ourselves with, there’s, that invisible sense of pride from being Chinese, that was, that sense of superiority of being Chinese, not wanting to be with the Koreans, we were, living, on someone else’s land, but felt, that they were, second class citizens. This weird belief, showed the most when someone is arguing with an Asian person, when we only needed to blurt out, “You looked like a Korean!”, it was, the biggest sort of insult to the individual, and, the person you’re arguing with will totally get outraged when you’d called them that.

like this family???  Photo from online…

Growing up in this sort of an atmosphere, I’d only begged to pass the Korean language exams, and, every other course in high school, I’d made straight A’s, only Korean, I’d scored toward the bottom; and, my communication abilities was just enough, for me to use when I go shopping in the marketplaces.

When the Korean who’d come met me to show me he was related to me, he’d provided the adoption papers, and photos of me as a young child, mailed everything to me, and, all of those, “evidences” proved, that I was, a Korean, heads down!

Isn’t it outrageous, thinking that I was, Chinese all along, and then, I turned out to be, Korean? This was, the biggest kind of irony. I refused to admit that I was, Korean, I hated that classmate who’d, exposed me for who I was, and I’d, hated my birthmother, for giving me up for adoption.

After six months’ worth of struggles, my second eldest sister kept making those international calls to care for me, and, repeatedly, sent the presents to my husband and my two children, and my heart finally, started, to disarm itself, and finally agreed to, meet with them.

In the city of Suwon, I’d finally, met my five sisters and my younger brother. All these middle-aged uncles and aunts, as they’d, described of the hardship and trials they’d weathered through in life, I’d not heard a single word of complaint, their persistence, optimism, passion, comparing to my own prejudices, my aloofness, my dissatisfactions, made me so ashamed I wanted to find a hole to hide in.

What right had I, to hold my prejudices against Koreans? And, why can’t I understand, the pains and hardships my mother who’d carried me for ten whole months, and know how trying it must’ve been, for her, to give me up for adoption? Had it been not my birthfather’s death when he was way too young, had it not been my mother being too young, and needed to remarry, had it not been for my second eldest sister crying for one whole weeks at my adopted mother’s home, and got “returned”, and I got sent up for adoption, my fate would’ve been, so totally, different, how could I have gotten to live as an only child, cherished, sent to Taiwan for my college years, to become a teacher, to meet a good man, and marry and have children.

or this???  Photo from online…

And now, both my mothers had passed, but the love they had for me, was enough, to last me, my whole life. Toward my birthmother, other than being grateful, there’s, that extra understanding; for my adoptive mother, other than, being grateful, there’s that sense of, missing her forever!

And so, it’s all due to fate, that this had, happened, and, back when you were a child, you may not understand WHY it was, that you were, given up for adoption, and perhaps, you’d carried the resentments toward your birthparents, for giving you up, and your adoptive parents, to keeping the truth from you, but, as you got older, and started your own family, you’d, realized, that given the situations of your past, all those adults did what they thought was, best for you, and, you’d become, grateful, for having everything that you have in life…

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don’t Record, Don’t Watch, the Only Way to Stop the Footages of Sex from Leaking Out Out of Revenge

The ONLY way, of KILLING, ELIMINATING this ILL of society is by the simple principle of SUPPLY & DEMAND, if there’s no demand, then, there wouldn’t, be a need for, supplies, would there? Of course N-O-T! From the Newspapers, translated…

There’s, an increased opportunities for students to log online and use the friendship apps to make friends, and recently, there’d been, in influx of “revenge style pornography” lately, the Department of Education reminded the parents, to show MORE cares and concerns toward their children’s activities online, and their habits of using the internet, to prevent them from being victimized, or, a perpetrator, in the instances of “revenge style pornography”.

The Department of Education’s directors of student matters and special education stated, that “revenge-style pornography” is defined as not getting consent from the parties involved, to spread the intimate photos, or images for other people’s viewing, to spreading it out to the victims’ relatives, friends, or families as threats, and this happens, normally, in a break up or in cases where the scam artists scammed people for love online, it’d broken the laws of the rights of one’s own bodies, the privacies, and reputations, and, if the related files were, passed abroad, or got saved by someone, and, this would, continue, to damage the victims continually.

And, if we want to prevent this sort of revenge-style pornography from getting into schools all over, the officials pointed out, that the individuals can, prevent themselves, from being victimizes, to set up the emotional connections with someone, and NEVER send the photos of intimacy to one another, and, the two individuals shouldn’t be asking one another for it in the first place, and, if you know that a classmate, or a friend or relative, or family member’s photos of intimacy were spreading all over the internet, you should notify the police, and if you’re involved, in spreading out the footages, you will be held, accountable, legally too.

Because during the winter vacations, the students will have more time online, the Department of Education reminds the parents, to get to know your children’s habits of online usage, to use the programs offered by the department of education, to prevent your children from, surfing to porn, or drug websites. At the same time, the parents must show care and concerns when the children head out, especially when meeting up with someone from online, to protect oneself more, to prevent cases of rape or sexual harassments.

After school starts, the Department of Education also called out to the instructors, to see if there are abnormalities in the students’ emotional responses, to detect and diminish the cases of “revenge-style pornography” early, to protect the students’ right to learn, and to live safely, inside the campuses.

And so, this, is still NOT a one-man job, preventing ALL of this, and yet, because of the basic ECONOMIC principle (supply AND demand), there’s, NO sure way, to prevent this sort of SHIT from happening, and we can only, keep on, educating the MASSES about the dangers of these sorts of SHITS that are, happening all around us, but, it’s still, in the individuals who are, involved, to PREVENT these1 sorts of SHITS from happening, don’t do it, don’t share photos of intimacies with anybody, because you will, get SCREWED over!!!

Life Took a Sharp Turn

On changing tracks, not knowing, if you’d, made the right choices in life or not! Translated…

Life flew by too fast, it’d been six months, since my return back to Puli, this small town to live. The me a decade ago, or even, just two years ago, I’d never imagined a life like this for me.

Being on the rise through school and into the workforce, I’d entered into my first-choice schools locally, and entered into my top choices of university, after I graduated, I’d started working as an engineer in the well-known high-tech companies in Taipei. I’d worked very hard, and my abilities gotten the attention of the boss, in a few short years, I’d gotten promoted, and raises too. Back then, I’d imagined, that ten years later, I should be a high-end manager in the workforce, and would go on business trips to Europe and America often.

like this???the roadsigns of your life…

And now, I’d, walked with difficulties, with my pregnant belly, travelled on foot, delivering the goods that my clients ordered, and pondering, what I needed to update onto my website to sell when I arrived home.

A few years ago, I’d gotten married for a while, as my husband and I started thinking about when to have children, and how we’re going to take care of our kids after they were born. Both working as engineers in the high-tech companies, after subtracting the time for sleep away, there were only, about two hours in the late hours of the nights we can, save for ourselves. We didn’t want to be missing out on the coming of age of our young, so, a change in track was needed. And, something had, happened at home then, after careful considerations, we’d decided to quit our jobs, return back home, and my husband started working in the field, and I, started setting up my online shop.

Recalling how back when I’d just graduated from graduate school, my dad asked me if I wanted to take the public offices examinations. Back then, I was so satisfied with my own life, full of confidence, didn’t consider, that the life of a government office worker wouldn’t suit me well. But now, as my shop online just got set up, I’d had an unstable source of income, and I’d found those job openings in the areas of Puli, and I’d, wanted, to kick myself. After I’d left Taipei, Hsinchu, and Tainan, cities with the larger scale technology companies, it’s like, I’d, whited out my past work experiences. As I’d passed the post offices, along with Taipower offices, I couldn’t help but wondered, if I’d, only taken the government post exams.

imagine how different life can turn out for you…photo from online…

At the age of thirty, for the sake of my family, my life took a sharp turn, and I can’t tell yet, whether if it’s going to be good or bad, but I believe, that so long as I carried the heart I’d had before, worked hard, I can totally, find a brand new direction in life again.

And so, this, is a huge life-changing situation you’re, faced with now, isn’t it? You’d quit your government job, to chase your dreams, so you can have more time with your young, to not miss out in their coming of age, and, although you’re, unsure of whether or not you’d, made the correct choices in life, your life knows where it’s, taking you.

Brought Up that Way

“You can’t blame him”, she’d told, all her friends, as they all showed their condolences toward how she got that shiner on her eye, along with those bruised cheeks, again!

Brought up that way, that, was the sorry excuse that she’d used, to rationalize why he would take the downs of his life out on her!  Brought up that way, excusing his bad behaviors, how long, can you keep on, lying to yourself?  I know how much you wanted to believe in his FALSE promises of how he’ll change, how he will NEVER lay a hand on you, but, by NOT taking actions against HIS abuse, you’re only, getting yourself deeper…

Brought up that way, you’d been, using that, to EXCUSE his bad behaviors, and how many times had he hit you?  Gosh, I dunno, let me C-O-U-N-T………Brought up that way, yeah, so, let’s, examine the situations, shall we?  So, based off of that way of logic, shouldn’t ALL men who were raised under abuse, BE abusive?  But, NOT all MEN raised by abuse are abusive to their spouses (although the occurrences of abuse is higher, than the occurrences of not!).

Brought up that way?  So, I can BEAT the SHIT out of someone, when I feel awful about me, if I saw my father, beating on my mother every single night of my childhood?  Or, can I say those “accidental” hurtful words to you, because I heard daddy, yelling those mean things to mommy, and, they actually thought, that I was, already, asleep, as their arguments occurred, LATE in the nights?

Stop making excuses already, brought up that way?  Yeah, I too, WAS raised up by VERBAL, EMOTIONAL/PSYCHOLOGICAL abuses, as well as SEXUAL molestations, and for that, I’d taken it all out, on my D-O-L-L-S, ‘cuz they can’t fight BACK, so, don’t tell me I don’t know SHIT ‘bout scapegoating here!