Category Archives: Interpersonal Relations

Articles of interpersonal relationships, either created by me, or found in the papers, or other media

Expanding the Conversations Beyond “Had You Eaten Yet?”

How the grandparents found ways into interacting with their grandchild, using HIS, interest profile, translated…

One day last week after supper, my third-grade grandson, Cheng-Cheng brought a three-by-three Rubik’s cube to show me, said that he’d been playing, that after he’d mixed up the colors, it takes him about forty seconds to put the same colors all on the sides, I’d commended him on how amazing he was, and asked him if he could also teach grandma to do it too?  He’d told me sure, then, asked me for a pen and paper, and started dictating to me the steps to solve the Rubik’s Cube, with the notes written for me.

Holy, I don’t even know what a Rubik’s Cube was until this day, plus, the nine-year-old child’s lacking in the means to teach well, my head started, swelling up.  But in this process of him teaching me, I’d found, that he was, so very, patient, as I’d asked him questions, he’d repeatedly shown me how, until his dad upstairs called him up to take a bath, Cheng-Cheng still didn’t want to go yet, because, he’d not yet taught me how to solve the third layer of the Rubik’s Cube yet.

I’d told him, the lesson can’t be finished today, we do it another day!  Rushed him to go upstairs to take a bath, then to bed.  As he got upstairs, he’d immediately LINED me: “If you have any questions, line me anytime.”  So, my young grandson was really into, training me to solve the Rubik’s Cube.

After lunch the following day, Cheng-Cheng was responsible, coming over to continue teaching me from yesterday, I’d told him “Cheng-Cheng, I went shopping for the groceries, I didn’t find the time to digest what you’d taught me from yesterday, and I’m sorting through the produces I got today right now, I don’t have the time here, we shall begin again, tomorrow then!”

And, to make sure that I understand what my grandson was talking about the following day, I’d, found the videos on the Rubik’s Cubes that night, with Cheng-Cheng’s beginners’ lessons, I’d, immediately, finished the Rubik’s cube.  Yay, great!

But the following morn, I’d still decided to let him teach me, to make him feel, that he’d, taught his grandma how to solve the Rubik’s cube, that way, it would, please him more?

Still recalled how when he’d started playing go, he’d often bugged the two of us to play with him, we didn’t know a thing about go, and so, we’d, immediately started flipping through the volumes, and we’d also, found the videos on how to play online, then, we’d started, getting it.  Although, playing with him, who’d won the young champion trophies, we’d felt like we were, slaughtered, but, winning and losing isn’t our, focus, we just want to, have more opportunities to interact with our grandson.

And so, as he’d asked us to accompany him to play the piano, to play soccer, badminton…………we were, both, very happy to oblige.  Getting involved in what he’s into, hoping we could, increase the chances of interactions with him, to have common conversation topics, because I do NOT want our conversations to get reduced to, “have you eaten today yet?”

And so, this is how this young grandchild, got his grandparents active in learning new things, because they want to interact with him at his level, and seeing how diverse the child’s interests are, that’s why, the elders had, upped their abilities to learn things.

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Filed under Family Matters, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Obstacles in a Relationship, Parent-Child Interactions, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

A Vietnamese Girl

Connections with an unknown strangers on a flight, how the affinity extends to afterwards, translated…

In September of 2019, I’d rushed back from Vietnam, there was a Vietnamese girl sitting next to me on the plane, silently, reading.

“Hi, are you traveling in Vietnam, young lady?”, I’d broken the silence after the meals were eaten.  “No, I’m from Vietnam, going to Taiwan to study!”  as she’d spoken, there was, that thick, accent.  Because the nurse’s aide we’d hired was also Vietnamese.  She’d shyly introduced herself , “Hi, I am Yu-Hwa, I’m not that fluent in Mandarin!”

I’d started talking to her slowly, and she’d, slowly, opened up to me.  She was the Asian descent, grew up in the poverty stricken farm, her parents worked really hard, carried the bricks, raised the fowls, helped with the planting in the fields, everything.  More than a decade ago, her mother, in order to better the economics of their home, came to Taiwan, and worked for nine years as a nurse’s aide, later, she’d encouraged her daughter to attend the university in Taiwan.

illustration from UDN.com

how these strangers became, like families to one another!

She’d been separated from her own mother at the tender age of eight, she’d often cried when she wasn’t being watched by others.  Her mother worked hard, buying up the estates, the livestock, and a cab for her father too, sacrificed too much already.

“Dad drives a cab, didn’t make that much, so on the weekends, I’d worked as much as I could, that way, I wouldn’t need any money from my family,” my heart went out to this young woman, she’d shyly told me, that this was the first time she’d told her story to a random stranger.  I’d patted her on the shoulders, said that being in the same city, we’d come, to share this, affinity.

By the time the flight landed in Clear Springs Hill Airport in Taichung it was already nine, I’d decided to give her a ride to her school with my husband, it could save her more than a thousand dollars N.T. in cab fares.  We’d exchanged contact information, and told her she was welcome to visit “grandma and grandpa” anytime.

Later, Yu-Hwa went to visit a couple of times with her classmates from Vietnam, and we’d become, more acquainted.  At the start of 2020, MERS-CoV started, Taiwan was in stage three alert, and, it’d, messed up the order of many people’s lives.  The outbreaks halted our gatherings, and yet, we’d, not shared any less of the connections once, she’d called, told me that her classmate had contracted the virus, that she was in the at-home quarantine, we’d swiftly, delivered the needed foods, the medications for her, and we didn’t feel relieved, until we’d learned she was, okay.

A lot of things canceled, she said she’d lost her original part-timing opportunity too, we’d worried about her livelihood, and comforted her at the same time, and we had our friend find her work sorting the mails at night, and it’d, helped her solve the problems of running short on the money needed.

Due to the outbreaks, Yu-Hwa hadn’t returned back to Vietnam for two years, and missed her families.  We hoped to give her some warmth as she needed.  When you’re alone and helpless, if there’s someone there, offering you the encouragements, even if it doesn’t solve your problems, it’s still, a positive, energy.

In June of this year, as parents, we’d, attended Yu-Hwa’s graduation, and we were, moved.  She’d told us, that being in Taiwan for four years, because of the outbreaks, she couldn’t travel around, but, there’s, that thickness of the connection with the people she’d met in her life here, and we too, cherished this, amazing connection of us, similar to that of grandparents and grandchildren’s.

And so, this is on how you’d, connected with a random stranger, and it all started with a simple conversation on that plane, and, the connections that got started on the flights, extended to until they got off, and continued into the young woman’s college careers, and, I’m sure, that it will keep on extending onwards.

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, College Life, Connections, Interpersonal Relations, Kindness Shown, Life, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

Yang’s Using the Innovative Teaching Methods in Physical Education, Using the Experience Education to Help the Student Acquire the Right Values of Life

Getting the entire class involved in designing the activities for all, she’d helped the students gain empathy, and made sure that those students with special needs are also, involved in the physical education courses too, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The Hsinbei City Banciao High School instructor, Yang worked hard to innovate the kinesiology courses, set up the specialty instructors’ group with other physical education teachers in the country, to develop the creative, innovative teaching materials.  Through the teamwork, the project-based learning methods, the modules of physical education, incorporating the technologies, helped the students find their passions for the exercises, the sports, and regained their self-confidence, she’d competed in the creative kinesiology lesson plans competitions and won many awards, she had won the Teacher of the Year Award this year for the innovations in teaching physical education. 

the coach, with the students in basketball practice!

photo from online

Other than a homeroom instructor, she’s also, the boys’ basketball coach, the P.E. teacher, also the Kinesiology Science Center’s Seed teacher, gotten involved in the NPDL, the Department of Education’s QPE plans, toured as a guest lecturer, shared her experience, showed her passions in all areas of education.

One of her student, Yen, with cerebral palsy, who’d often, “drove” her electrical wheelchair around the school.  Yang-Yang, the visually impaired student who can see no more than six inches before his face, is quite agile, can always dodge the obstacles right before he’d, bumped into them.  At a substitute for the special needs instructor, she’d gotten the opportunity to work with these students, and, promised to give them, “a P.E. class for you like everybody else!”

First, Yang used the health and leisure activities to help increase the depth of her courses, to give the students who has her for electives a first hand experience of how the handicapped had experienced things differently, and had the students’ input, in coming up with the fitting physical activities for the whole class to get involved with, through the test trials, the amending the procedural, through the team games, to help the students gain empathy, to having the students sit in the wheelchairs, with the patches covering their eyes, to have the students imagine, the challenges the special needs students may face, and how they’re to, get pass the challenges.

Yang told, that the belief of education she wanted to pass to her students is turning the limits to opportunities, through the creativity of the classes, she’d, set up the what seemed to be, impossible P.E. course.

with the assortments of materials she uses, to design the P.E. activities…photo from online

And so, this instructor not only, taught her kids that exercise is important, in staying health, through getting the class involved in designing the activities that the special needs students can also get involved in, she’d taught them about empathy as well, amazing, this woman, in having her students get involved in the hands-on, to teach them about accepting those who are, different than they are, and that is something, that her class will find useful, even outside of the school setting.

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Filed under Children with Rare Conditions & Special Needs, Education, Interpersonal Relations, Life, News Stories, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Stories of Hope, Teaching by Example, The Education of Children, Values

The Gathering at McDonald’s

The memories of your youth, tied to, McDonald’s…translated…

As I’d finished my morning sessions at school, on my way home, I’d called the kids, asked them what they wanted for lunch, that I could, swing by the stores and pick the foods up.

McDonald’s!  They called out to me in synchrony.

The weather’s too heated, standing under the sun felt like my body was, weighty, if I’d, spat onto the tarp road, I suppose, there will be smokes from the, evaporations.  As I arrived, parked my scooter, I’d, pushed open that glass door, covered in sweat, the air-conditioning greeted me, suddenly, I’d become, totally, relaxed, in only about a second, I’d felt, chilly somewhat.

It’d past the mealtimes then, there’s not that many customers in the store, only a pair of grandfather grandchild at the counter, and, there were, two student couples, discussing about what they’re ordering in front of the self-serve ordering stations.

On the day we graduated out of technical high school, I’d met up with my classmates at the McDonald’s opposite of the school, we’d agreed that we would have lunch there, then, discuss where we’re headed next.

Recalling it now, when we were young, we’d often, met up, in the McDonald’s.

As the graduation ceremonies are over, the school was left in a huge mess, the students were holding each other and crying then, some of the students rushed off to say goodbye to the instructors, or to leave a bad word with an instructor, some took shots with their families in school for photo ops, some were just, wandering the campus, like, they’d forgotten to wander these schoolyards for the past three years they’d been in here.

Forgotten what it was, I was the earliest to arrive, McDonalds before noon, not that many customers, and there were the wide selections of seats.  I’d put down my backpack, my art supply bags, and a few books, to save my classmates a large table, and I’d felt, very, proud of myself then.

As I got the seats, I’d gone to order my own foods.

These gathering at McDonald’s, they’d given me something pleasant to remember, the workers always smiled at you, patient in taking your orders, in explaining the items to you, like they were, your, friends.

I clearly recalled, I’d, ordered a Big Mac Value meal, back then, the value meals were the most pricy, I’d forgotten the exact cost, at least, eighty, or ninety dollars, and back then, we could still purchase a boxed meal for just, forty dollars.

That was, the very first time I’d had, a Big Mac.

When I was younger, every time we’d dined at McDonald’s, I’d always had the happy meals, because of the toys; as I got older, either the cheeseburgers, or the McNuggets, I’d never, thought of, having a Big Mac, felt that it was, too steep for my tastes, a food that’s, inhumane in its cost, which means, that it wasn’t, meant for us to, eat.

But it was, graduation, and how many graduations will we have in life?

I’d sat at the edge of the large table, as I ate my value meal, finished the fries, slurped down the large coke, and yet, none of my classmates showed up.

Back then, I’d thought, this food is amazing, I will, love it, for life.

The grandfather-grandson pair hadn’t decided yet, the two pairs of student couples already ordered, and waited behind me for their orders to get called out.

The technologies weren’t that advanced, these few years, the Self-Serve Order Stations are set up, the large iPad screen, with the vibrant colors, no facial expressions, how you treat it, is how it, treats you.  Maybe I’m just, too old, I’d only tried ordering from the self-serve kiosk once, couldn’t get used to it, and still returned to the counters, where I’d be greeted by the smiling cashier.

I’d listened to the grandfather-grandson pair before me, talking about what they are to order, not known, if one day in the futures, I wouldn’t DARE, open up the front doors to a McDonald’s.

As the classmates arrived, I’d waved at them happily.  As everybody was there, nobody ordered the value meals, only a few servings of large fries, and several cokes.  All of us, put our hands in, dumped the fries onto the trays, then, we’d, shared the foods, I’d not had anything to say, and, nobody could, talk to me then.  Not long thereafter, before the fries are halfway gone, we’d already, decided where we’re headed in the afternoon, and readied to leave, then, the group of us, still, a handful each, grabbed the trash and the leftovers, and, tossed the leftover, the trash into the garbage, back then, there were the strict recycling means of separating the recycled materials yet.

I watched those fries, thought to myself: what a shame! 

The grandfather-grandson pair finally made up their, minds now, it came my turn, I’d, walked up, it’d been, thirty years since my technical high school days, the employee at the McDonald’s still just as kind, like a memory, this world, will, never, age a day!

As I’d ordered the foods my children specified, I’d thought, yeah, I shall have a Big Mac and fries, supersized.

So, this brings back the memories, going to the McDonald’s to order the meals for your children now, because back then, you were, children too, and you’d, shared a lot of wonderful things, and it was, memorable, because it was the last time that you all gathered up together, to share some foods, that one last, final time, before you all go, separate on your own lives.

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Filed under Interpersonal Relations, Life, Memories Shared, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

A Bump-in in the Elevator

The teacher’s seeing a former student again, and remembered how he’d been in her class, translated…

The night we saw the graduates off, I watched the students lined up, gotten onto the podium, received their awards, bowed, then climbed back down.  There is, NO graduating class this year, and no emotional rollercoaster ride either, I’d, gazed toward the podium, listening to the announcer, “let’s welcome the drummers of XX Middle School!”, suddenly, a familiar shadow pulled me in.

It’s him!  The graduate from two years ago.  He’d transferred here in the sixth grade, that’s why I’d paid close attention to him—unlike how the higher graders in the legends that walked on air, he always sat quiet, at the corner of the class, waiting on me to call on him, or give him something to do; unlike most of his class that are, rowdy and boisterous, he always waited until the very last moment, then asked me what I was doing next, then, silently, finished the tasks I’d given him to tackle.  And, maybe it’s because of how quiet he is, I’d often worried, that someone in class would pick on him, and I’d, watched over him especially.

like this!

photo from online

Dong-dong!  Dong-dong!  Seeing him use all of his might to wave those drum sticks, he’d gotten taller too, I’d felt, relieved and glad.  As the students were finished with their performances, I couldn’t hold back my emotions, ran over to him and asked, “Do you still remember me?”, he’d nodded shyly, then, pushed the drums into the elevators.  In that moment we connected, I’d waved toward him, before the elevator door closed, I’d told him to keep working hard at it.

Then, I’d, never seen him again, and yet, that feeling of becoming emotional when we did meet, seemed to, stuck in that freeze frame of my mind, it’d become, one of the most unforgettable graduation I’d ever, attended.  Child, are you all right?  How are you all? And so, this is that moment that lingered on inside your mind, of how you saw the growth of a student from your class, how he’d, come out of his, shells, finding something he’s good at doing, which was a way he could use, to connect to the world outside.

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Filed under Education, Interactions Shared with the World, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Perspectives, Properties of Life, The Education of Children

The Care & Concerns that Came Like a Surge of Warmth

The cares shown to us, in our, day-to-day interactions with the outside world, translated…

Awhile ago, my mother wasn’t quite well, she needed surgery, the period of recovery afterwards, she’d rarely gone to the marketplace she used to go to for her shopping.

like this

shopping for the groceries, the produces from day to day…photo from online

that day, she’d finally made it out to shop.  As soon as the cashier from the supermarket saw her, she’d greeted gently, “haven’t seen you in a long while.”, as she got to the marketplace, the stand owners who knew my mother, inquired her, “is everything all right with you?”, my mother kept to herself on her physical health but toward the inquiries of those whom she’d interacted with from day to day, she’d felt the warmth, and the kindness, and, it’d added more courage, gave her the boost of energy she was in dire need of from being ill, lifted her spirits up, quite a bit too.

and, this

photo from online

The genuine care and concerns came like surges of warmth, something that we can feel, and it can give us the boosts we are in dire need of, in a lot of places, these connections are accumulated, through our interactions from day to day with others, and that, is how we are, connected to each other in this world.

And so, this is on, making the strong connections with your day-to-day life, interacting with others in your lives regularly, sharing that care and concerns for one another, continue to socialize with our, external, environment.

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Filed under Interactions Shared with the World, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Social Awareness, Socialization, Translated Work

A Present & a Wish

The student’s thoughtfulness, that’s, given his former instructor so very much, translated…

Most of us know, that we don’t have the lucks to win the lottery.  But, if we won the receipt drawings of two hundred dollars, we’d felt, that’s just, “okay”.  So, how many just “okays” would you need, to feel, blessed?

I’m a light user of social media, I’d gone up to dive every now and then.  One day, I’d, gone only, and started, reading through the updates of my friends, saw a student who works in the U.S. wrote, “I plan to return to Taiwan from U.S. in two weeks, if you have something you want me to bring, do make, a wish!{“

“Do make a wish”, the words, they’re like the extravagant fireworks from Taipei 101, suddenly, it’d, exploded in front of my eyes.  I’d gone way past the year of wishing for things, it’d felt, a bit, surreal.  My life’s been filled with the needs of my kids’ daily living, birthdays, Christmases, are time for wishes for them.  Do I, have an, opportunity to, make a, wish too?

I’d loved the coffees, and, the cost is half of what it’d cost here.  And, just so that six months ago, the ordered amount had been, nearly, completely, gone, and I can’t buy it off from online.  Making the coffees, sniffing that hazelnut scent that came over my office, that was, the wakeup ritual I’d needed every morn.  The moment the coffee reached my tongue, that was, getting that completely charged up energy in my batteries.

I’d texted my student privately.  Back and forth, back and forth, he’d, made sure of the brand, the price, and the packs, and, I saw how the price he’d told me was cheaper than the discounted price, it’d felt, refreshing.  Turned out, he works for the largest electronic purchaser globally.  Lucky me!

Recalling how these days, my children’s classmates contracted the virus, stood in line buying the quick-scan kits, and the at-home quarantines that messed things up for me.  The panic, the anxieties, the fatigue.

I’d received the text from my student, “I’d fulfilled my quarantine term now, I’m out, I shall send the package out for you, teacher!”

He’d only returned for three short weeks, and, the at-home quarantine, and the quarantine hotel took up three whole weeks, and as he’d gotten out, he’s still, busied in sending out all the items in the “make-a-wish list” he had, started.  I’d heard him told, that as soon as his father saw him, he’d asked him, “Why so many luggage?”, what kindness of heart he must have, that he can, fulfill the wishes of dozen of his friends, in the messiness of the pandemic?

I was lucky to make that wish, not only, was I blessed to become a teacher, and glad to have seen my student’s postings.  His passions, and kindness came from overseas, brought that warmth to me.  My luck, was fulfilled by others’, giving to me, and kindness toward me.

Next week when I get to my office, I shall, brew up a pot of coffee and share it with my coworkers.  “Does anybody want a healing cup of joe?”

And so, this is the thoughtfulness of the student, and, his “make-a-wish” had made his former instructor’s “dreams” come true, and this still just showed, how something tiny, but thoughtful, can make someone so happy, brighten up someone’s life.

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Filed under Interpersonal Relations, Kindness Shown, Life, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

Goodbye in the Sunset

Meeting back up with his high school instructor now, and she’d wondered how he’d been, translated…

During the summer of my sophomore year in university, I’d worked at a gas keg delivery shop, to make my own tuition and money for living, in the three months’ work, I’d only taken two days off.

At sunset that day, I’d ridden out on my scooter, with two large gas kegs, rammed into the tiny alley.  The woman who’d heard me rang the bell came, ushered me into her kitchen.  I lowered my cap, put down that heavy gas keg, swiftly, I’d, exchanged the old one with the new, and working in the high heat, it’d caused me to sweat like crazy.

The woman handed me a bowl of mung bean soup, and it’d moved me.  After all, in my days of working as a delivery person, I’m more used to being treated aloofly by others.

I’d lifted my head up wanted to say thanks, but, as I saw the woman’s face, tears came falling down my cheeks.

The woman opened her eyes wide up, looked stressed at me, the originally kind expression, suddenly turned merciful, and doubting, her eyes were, red too.

That woman, was my high school Chinese instructor.  She’d, identified me, anxiously inquired, “are you still in school, how’s the family?  How have you been?”, her inquiries came very fast, she’d still remembered how back in my final year of high school, that something majored happened at home, how I’d, frowned through that final year, never spoken another word to anybody again.

“Teacher, all is well with me now, I’m grateful for your concerns of me back then, I’m just, part-timing as a gas keg delivery person in the summers, it pays better!”, I’d explained to her, and she’d, started, smiling.

As I said goodbye to her, my instructor stood at the entrance of the alley, paved with the golden rays of the setting sun, like a kind mother, waving goodbye to me.

And so, this is how this instructor kept you in her mind, because of how you were back in high school, and, she’d become like a mother to you, as she’d shown the care and concerns for you back in your high school years, and you were grateful for her for being so kind too.

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Filed under Growing Up Too Fast, Helping Behaviors, Interpersonal Relations, Kindness Shown, Lending a Helping Hand, Life, Perspectives, Properties of Life

A Simple Deed

That simple gesture to greet each other, that’s made you connected with the outside world…translated…

Upon reading the article, “Don’t Forget Your Smile”, on July 13th by the writer, Chen, I can’t help but smile.

As the pandemic started, I can’t bear to see my parents, sitting at home with nothing to do all day long, so I’d taken the afternoons when the sun came shining out, to take them to stroll at the vacant riverside park.  To avoid the scorching sun, we’d gone at the set time, and the route is the exact same too, and, after awhile, I’d found those who are, the same as we.

Although dad’s already ninety, he’s still very agile, still clear in thought, and maybe, it’s his rolling around long in the business world, not being afraid of strangers was his strong suit, and not long as we began our strolls, he’d started, greeting others whom he came across, and in the end, it’d become like “Don’t Forget Your Smile”: the smiles you showed others, will produce the unimaginable butterfly effects.”

And now, we still go to the riverside park, other than getting the workout, we are more excited to bump into the cyclist who are riding the bikes, Mr. Chen who is really close to my father-in-law; Mr. Shen who was once a concrete paver before he retired, who’s always dressed nicely, Mr. Shen; Mr. Liao who had knee troubles, and can only ride his bicycle very slowly, with his black puppy running beside him.  These are, all the friends my father’s made by his “simple gestures”.

just say hello!

like this…photo from online

Oh yeah, after the summer started, we’d see a young lady who may be a student, who’d used a steady pace to run next to the river.  The next time, in the unawkward moments, not surprising or shocking her, I want to tell her, “keep working hard!”

And so, these are the regular interactions you came to share with your external environment, and, from that greeting of a simple “hi” or a nod of acknowledging one another, you’d made a friend, that just showed, how important it is, for us to keep on connecting with each other in our external environments, especially during the time of the outbreaks.

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Connections, Interactions Shared with the World, Interpersonal Relations, Kindness Shown, Life, Observations, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Socialization

The Variations of My New Nesting Alone

Here comes, the empty nest, how to occupy oneself, by finding hobbies, and, learning to adapt to life on your own in the elderly years maintaining that connection to your friends, your acquaintances, translated…

With the compounded milestone of retirement and my wife’s death, it’d caused me to lose the focal point of my suddenly.  I’d started immersing myself into a ton of activities for the retired persons, hiking, traveling, writing, book clubs, birdwatching, calligraphy, Buddhist teachings, Tai-Chi, etc., etc., etc., what everybody else’s “continuing education” for me is just “rushing to make the deadlines of my assignments,” and “killing my time”, nothing more.

Later, my youngest daughter got married first, moved out of our home, and started a brand new perfect family with my son-in-law.  As she was pregnant, I’d immediately signed up for the nanny classes, and worked hard in learning, and to get myself, certified.  As my young granddaughter was born, I’d gone to stay with the family to take care of her for a while, but they’d felt, that my certification was from the books, and I didn’t have any real experiences.  And so, they would take the advices of those parents online, and research the means to care for their young, and bring it up in discussions with me, to learn with me.

what he was left with after his children grew up…photo from online

As my granddaughter got a bit older, they considered how hard it was for me to care for their young, they’d placed their daughter at the daycare center, and only when they are too busy at work, and couldn’t get away, then, they would call me up to look after my granddaughter.

My eldest daughter lives with me, originally, we’d gotten into arguments when we had the dogs in the house, after she was married, her husband moved in, and it’d added to the complexity of interaction, and inconvenience of life.  Although we shared the same residence, we’d interacted like strangers, and the home I’d lived in my whole life, seemed too strange to me now.

Both homes, although, there are the bedrooms for me, but, I’d felt like an extra on the set.

Once as I’d visited a friend who’d moved into a retirement village, I was attracted to the services provided by the retirement living community, and thought about moving in.  And yet, in my conversations with him, I’d caught that hint of how it wasn’t as wonderful as I may have imagined, because there’s no people our age who’d cared for one another, and I’d decided, to put that idea on the backburner then.

And, there was a resident I had for rent which was about to expire, and, I’d started wondering if I should continue renting the place out or not?  I’d thought about it, my two daughters are married, with their own families and homes; and I’m an elderly person, with the free bus pass now, from before my retirement, I’d worked overseas and could care for myself, living alone is second nature to me.  And so, I’d decided, to let go of what’s tying me back, take that very first step toward my own independence at old age, took that rental space off the markets, moved out of my old nest, and started, living, alone.

As I’d moved in to my “new place”, the most important thing was I’d felt, that the twenty-four hours in the day belonged to solely me, I have all the time to use at my own preferences.  I now had enough time to read, to preview my school work, to research, to write down the lines that touched me which I read from the books………then, suddenly, these things I used to do to kill the time, no longer served that purpose anymore.

And because of how convenient it was, living on my own, my former classmates, my new ones, my old friends, my new acquaintances, to my home for gathering, teas, meals, chats, and we’d all interacted freely with one another, come and go as they pleased.  And this was the never-before sense of openness I now experience regularly.

Letting go of the self more, treat my self kind, I’m currently working on growing older, alone.

And so, this is a lesson that we all must learn to master eventually, because we will all age, and we will all face up with the means of children leaving the nest, and suddenly, we got too much time on our hands, and like what this man did, he’d worked hard, developing his own interests, and, found a way to keep up with his contacts, and continue to socialize with his external environment as he age.

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