Stepping into a New Place of Work, Stepping OUT of the Comfort Zones, the Growth of a Woman

Translated…

My close friend, Yun recently left the public facility she’d worked for for over ten years, and entered into a completely unfamiliar realm of medical technologies.  The different environments caused her to feel stressed, naturally, especially entering into the top three pharmaceutical company of the country to work, she needed to come into contact with English contracts, and endless number of medications; and she needed to listen to the coworkers, using English, to explain the purposes of the medications, the side effects, etc., etc., etc., at first, she felt she wasn’t up to the job at all.

But, in order to adapt quickly, other than asking other senior workers from her department, she’d also gone to the research lab of her company to read often, to find out about the related matters, to up her skills needed for work.

After she’d changed tracks, Yun worked hard every day, as if she’s constantly engaged into wars, the regular overtimes had become norm now.  Sometimes, during her hour-long lunch, she’d still reviewed the terms of the contracts; other than the endless small and big meetings, she also needed to handle a lot of the executive suits, and related matters, this cycle happens every single day, but, Yun is more than glad, willing, to take on the various challenges that her workforce give to her, to take responsibilities for her own ability and the development of her own careers.

Recently, she’d beaten the group of outstanding coworkers in a training, and earned herself a set of silver coins that were made, to commemorate the company becoming publicly traded.  Yun was extremely happy, felt that all of her hard work, had finally paid off; and she’d also proved to herself, that her views of “not getting tied down by a certain format of work”, and “get interactive with people from various backgrounds, it’ll help you grow”, was correct.

She told me, because she is new in the medical industry, she’d constantly told herself, that she must put in more time, more energy, slowly, develop the skills she needed for work.  Because, so long as she has the professionalisms of the area, it doesn’t matter what sort of challenges will come her way.

I saw on Yun, not just a woman with the ability to withstand great amounts of pressure, but also someone who was willing to learn new things; and, I’m also in awe at how she was able to get out of her comfort zone with so much courage too.

And so, we can attribute this woman’s success to her ability to adapt, to make changes, and her attitude to learning, and that, is what the companies are looking for, someone who’s not afraid to get involved with something new, someone who’s hard working, that, is why this woman was able to succeed in her career.

Partied into College, Didn’t Manage to Graduate, and, All that’s Left, Was a Middle School Level Education

Problems with early admissions, from the Front Page Sections, translated…

Being admitted into universities early, does that mean that the students had stopped, studying?  The new admissions program had allowed a lot of the last year high schoolers to be without the alarms, the stresses from the college entrance exams, and, there were, students who’d partied, too hard, to the point that they couldn’t even manage to graduate college, and, they only held a degree from middle school.

“Some want to circle around the island, others want to have part-time work experiences, and now, it’s all, ruined!”, the student, Chen, who was already accepted by a university said, he’d originally intended to part-time for awhile, “But I don’t know, if after I got in, would I get singled out, for not doing well in my classes this semester!”  a student who was preparing for the appointed exams said, that the students who had already been accepted had seriously interfered with his mindset for his taking his entrance exams, “They’re talking about what they’re going to do, it just sounded like cacophony to my ears!”

The college student, Chang last year entered into to the new admissions program, he’d told, that the last semester of his last year in high school actually just had a little over a month’s worth of instructions, that the grades really couldn’t tell anything, just work hard in college, why must people get carried away about the grades of this current semester.

In the past, there were students who got into university by early admissions in Taipei who’d brought a small mattress to class and started sleeping in the back of the classrooms, there were teachers who couldn’t take it, suggested, that “You can lay your heads down on the desks, just don’t make any noises”, there are also students who’d had doctors written out excuses, and took days off.

There are students in Taidong who didn’t get their high school diploma, and went into college, in the end, they’d not managed to graduate from college, and, ended up only having a middle school education.  The teachers told of an example, six, seven years ago, a student scored in the top half of the class, and, the private university that accepted him could take an equivalency degree, or certificate of completion, but back then, he didn’t even take all the credits he’d needed to get a high school degree, and the student ended up being expelled from college in his junior year, and, wanted to get a job, and discovered that he didn’t even HAVE a high school degree, and he’d returned back to school, to ask if he could make up the credit hours.

Yeah, so, from this, you can see, that schooling should be done, STEP-BY-STEP, and, this early admissions thing is an awful idea, because if you get accepted into a school by early admissions, that means you’re SET, and, you’d have NOTHING to do, in school, and that’s just, really stupid!

Written Out a Bright & Shiny Future…

We had, written out a bright and shiny future for both of us, we were, supposed to be together, sharing a love that lasts longer than eternity, but…

Written out a bright and shiny future, only that the future had gotten a mind of its own, and, it surely wasn’t going to go down this well-planned out road we’d mapped out for it, oh no!

Written out a bright and shiny future, so, where is it?  Oh, that was, gosh, I don’t even recall HOW long ago that was.  So, what happened?  Oh, life happened, that, was how that written-out, bright AND shiny future failed me.

Written out a bright and shiny future, the only thing, is that that, is not supposed to be how the future works.  Written out a bright and shiny future, but, it didn’t go my way, as NOTHING ever D-O-E-S, and so, I’m left here with this, unfulfilled expectation that the future promised me, a very, very, very long ago…

Written out a bright and shiny future for you, my child, and, ALL you had to do was, go with the “plans” I had for you, but NO, you had to go and fall in love, like I did, and get KNOCKED up, like I did, and now, your dreams will BE unfulfilled, and you can only, impose them onto your own young, just as I’d imposed my dreams unto you!

Took Care of My Mother-in-Law Until She’d Died, and Now, I’m Living Alone, Peacefully, as an Elderly Person

Caring for a loved one as she got older became a preparation of one’s own old age here, translated…

The year was 1949, I’d followed the service team that my husband belonged to to Taiwan, back then, my in-laws didn’t want to leave their homes behind, but they were convinced and persuaded by their wonderful son, fearing, that if the two of them elders stayed behind, they will be pressured by the Communists, and so, they’d come along with us too.

After China was taken, just as my husband had suspected, a lot of elderly people who’d stayed behind were kicked out of their own homes, and, they’d, starved to death.

Living in Taiwan for sixty years, at first, things went smoothly.  After a long time, my father-in-law died before my mother-in-law, my mother-in-law had lost her partner for life, she felt lonely, and, became stressed out day and night, and quickly, she’d become, troubled with depression and bipolar.  Since, my mother-in-law couldn’t even recognize her children and grandchildren anymore, and couldn’t take care of herself in daily living.

She’d tied up her sheets and quilts every single day with a rope, mumbled, “I’m headed home.”, it’d made us all feel bad, and, we had no idea how to help her out.

What’s most difficult was, back then, there were NO adult diapers to be bought, and so, I could only use those old sheets, and cut them up, and change my mother-in-law several times a day, and, if it was a rainy day, and, she ran out of clean cloth diapers, I’d had to add a pot of coal, to dry it up, and reuse.  I’d done all of this, more than enough, until she’d passed away.

My mother-in-law had always been very strict toward her daughter-in-law, she had twelve children, whom she’d overseen the births of, after she’d wiped down her children, and wrapped them all up after they were born, she’d immediately returned to the fields to work again.  She’d even said, “giving birth to me is like taking a difficult toilet break, I never even had the chance to stay in bed all day long, like you, to recover.”

And now, I am already ninety, and because I’d gotten my share of the hard times, caring for my aging in-laws, and so, a decade ago, I’d made the decisions to leave all of my kids, I didn’t want to trouble them at all.  I’m really glad, that the place I chose for myself to live until I die is very peaceful and quiet, with the weather being nice.  The thyme, osmanthus, and flowers I’d planted, allowed me to live in the nature long-term.

And because this woman had the previous displeasures of caring for her ailing, aging, demented mother-in-law, she’d decided, that she wasn’t going to impose on her own children, which was why she’d chosen to live up in the mountains, and, she’s healthy enough to live on her own too, so, that was, a blessing, perhaps, for caring for her demented mother-in-law for a very long time, who knows???

 

 

 

The Beginning of the Pursuit of Dreams, from the Workforce

Translated…

As my eldest graduated college last year, because he was overweight, he’d skipped his draft calls, and went straight into the workforce.  He’d sent in over ten résumés, but, only one company called him for an interview, but unfortunately, he didn’t get the job.  My son told me he was sad, I’d told him not to worry, that the most important thing now for him, was to lose weight, because after he’d gotten his health in check, he can then, face up to the challenges in his life.

And so, my son went on his diets, and looked for work, but, he just couldn’t get the chance to get interviews, I’d asked him why these corporation had not given him a chance?  He’d told me, that he was with NO work experiences, NO certifications.  I’d recalled how I’d once gone through my job search with the employment center, and told him to go to the center to get registered.  He’d gone, and filled out the application for a worker, but the people at the office told him, that he was part-timing, and with a college degree, that it’d be a waste, the worker suggested that he’d apply for job trainings hosted by the government: encouraging those who are fresh in the workforce, to up their abilities; it’d offered youths from ages eighteen to twenty-nine, who had served their army terms, or exempt from serving, money, for training, up to $120,000N.T.

For this training, you could pay a fee, to take the courses, and, after you’d finished the courses, you can take the receipts to the government, to ask for tuition supplementing.  After my son learned of this, he’d immediately signed up, and, was prepared to get his certification in six months.  I’d recalled how he’d wanted to own a computer shop when he was younger, and now, he’s marching towards his dreams.  The assistance of $120,000N.T., gave way to the start of a young man’s dreams, it’s enough!  We saw how our son was willing to take this first step out, we feel very proud of him.

My son told us, that among his classmates, who’d looked for a job in a hurry, and ended up working for a falsified company, and in the end, not only did he not earn anything, he’d also gotten sued, and must pay fines; and, there was one, who’d crushed his pinky at work.  I felt so awful for them after I’d heard, I’d told my son, that he needed not worry about our finances, just go for his dreams, and not care how much wages his boss paid him, and ask himself, how many Ks am I worth?

A certain entrepreneur said, that entering the workforce at the age of twenty-three is simply too cruel, but, I think otherwise.  Because you’re young, and you can withstand your failed attempts, after several failures, my twenty-three year-old son would know, what his goals in life are, and what skills he needed to hone up on.

And so, this, is a great way, to encourage the younger generations, but, most parents are pressing their young, to GO find work, after graduation, after all, the parents are worried about their offspring’s futures, but hey, your children’s futures are already SET, and, you parents, worrying over what their plans are for the future is not going to help their transitions into adulthood easier, so, just let go already, because, everything HAS its time, just like the above had proven!

Is the Degree Really Useless?

Views on life, translated…

My students told me something odd; he’d wanted to take the government position exams, and, after he’d passed, he’d planned to drop out of school and start working, then, used his time being employed, to study, and finish up his college education, and work on the level examinations, then, work at government post until he retires.

What I was shocking was, that this student was originally, the most outstanding student of the class, he’d originally planned to take the judgeship examinations after he graduated from college, so, where did this huge change in him come from?

Turns out, other than the influences from his family, the society also had a huge impact on him, changing his mind.  How was he supposed to live off of just 20K a month?  Plus, if he wants to finish his college education, he still had to pay up his student loans for the four years, and so, he was hurried, to get himself into the workforce, so he could lessen the economic strains on his own family, as well as himself too.  I wanted to ask him, that if this, was actually what he wanted to do, or, was he pressed, by the economics?

Actually, his decision had made me feel, recalling how back in my twenties, I was, a carefree college student, although I’d nickeled and dimed my way through school, at least, I had no worries for my future, believed, that after I’d graduated, I should be able to find a job, I need to enjoy living, as a college student for the moment!

And still, with the changes that comes, the environment is no longer the same, and, the thoughts changed too, and, this current generation is filled with the uncertainties of the future.  I’d wanted to tell him, that college is for discoveries, and to contemplate one’s own future, it shouldn’t be a stepping stone to a job; there’s a lot of experiences to be had, and one must take advantage of it.  The early onset of being pressured by the economic burdens can cause one to forget about the passions one once held, and, end up, missing out, on this beautiful time of learning altogether.

And so, this student is focused on getting himself into a government post, as having a government post means that you’re SET for life, and that, would be the direction where a lot of the students now are working towards, and, they FAILED to realize, that college is a time for exploration, your last year of learning, after all, once you’re out of college, you’ll be, bombarded with the demands of the adulthood years, and, if you didn’t take full advantage of those schooling years, then, you will, end up regretting it.

The Bottom Half of the Cougars’ Lives, on Life After Work

On entering into the bottom half of one’s life, planning out the retirement, translated…

On the weekend afternoon, I’d gone to meet up with my old classmates, they were standing by the gates, off in the distance, if I didn’t know that it was them, I’d think they were a group of female students.

Actually, we’d graduated twenty-five years ago, and are all senior “beauties”, in midlife. Ever since we got connected again, we’d cherished our four years of friendship from before, and gathered from time to time, other than talking about life, about health, we’d also talked of the plans we have, for the bottom-half of our lives.

A was once the “dancing queen” of our class, she’d also represented the class, shortly after she graduated, she’d gotten married, is a stay-at-home wife and mother, and on top of that, she’d also made a name for herself, in an international trade company. Although she’s kept busy by work and at home, she’d kept up with her yoga class, so she’s able, to look young physically. Having just one more year to go until she’s able to retire, she’d talked of her dreams, of wanting to teach yoga, to turn her hobby into another chance of employment.

B, is the “most talented” of us all, after graduation, she chose the teaching career, later, she’d followed her husband abroad, but returned back to Taiwan, after her marriage was over, and continued teaching. Being remarried, she’s now, very happy. She’d always told us with glee about how she used the “attraction factor”, to find her own bliss, and hoped, that by sharing her experiences with us, through teaching at a seminar, to make a career for herself.

C was our “Robin Hood”, whenever there was injustice, she’d spoken out against it. After she graduated, she became a discipline officer at a certain university, because she wasn’t married, she’d taken her summer and winter vacations to volunteer, she planned, to retire at the age of fifty, she’d decided to pour her heart and soul into volunteering after she retires.

Looking at all of my former classmates, the first halves of their lives, for the sake of family/economics, they could only work in one job long-term, and now, as they’re about to enter into the bottom half of their lives, they no longer have the economic problems, and can start living for themselves.

Seeing how their eyes glowed when they talked of their dreams, I’m sure, that the bottom half of their lives will be just as interesting, and amazing too, as the first half, if not more so.

And so, this, would be the maturation process of women, because for the first half of their lives, they’d all focused, on living for someone or something else (families, work, etc., etc., etc.), and now, as they are about to retire, they can finally, live, for themselves! And they earned the right to too.

 

 

 

 

When You’d Lost the Passions for What You Do

This, is all about what DRIVES a person here!!!

When you’d lost the passions for what you do, because you’d worked in your jobs, for god knows how long, and, maybe, at the very start of your careers, you’d come in (to the workforce), with FULL zest, FULL energy, but, day, after day, AFTER day, AFTER day, it’s the same old grind, and eventually, what you loved doing, got turned, into a TOTAL drag, but by now, you’d become, so totally settled into your jobs, that, you just don’t feel like, and can find the motivations, for change, what, do you do?

When you’d lost the passion for what you do, I get, that having the passions for something is NOT the most important thing there is, I mean, take a look around, at ALL those dead artists (no offense!) who’d NEVER gained fame, until AFTER they’d died, if they’d lost the passions for what they do (which is ART!!!), then, would we have, so many great pieces, on display, in the museums out there?  No!

When you wake up in the morning, and feel, that you’re obligated, to go to work, then, you’d lost that love for what you’re doing, but, because what you really loved doing, well, let’s just say, that it does NOT pay your bills at ALL, and so, you still get dressed, and head to work, and, at work, as you thought about how much you HATED it, and yet, you’d had to, keep on, comin’ back to the same old grind, DAY, after DAY, after D-A-Y…

Point is: if you’d lost the passions for what you do, then, maybe, it’s time, that you considered, changing, to another job, because if you don’t, you will end up, getting, BURNT out, and who knows, you just might develop a case of anxiety, or even, depression too, and, DOWN goes your mental health!

Why Couldn’t She Care For Her Own Mother & Older Sister Back Home?

Because we’re already married, and, it’s NO longer our responsibilities to, but we’re still asked to, because we are, daughters!!!  A Q&A, translated…

Mr. C felt taken for his good friend, Madam A’s situation…

The sixty-year-old Madam A since she retired from a teaching post in a public school, she’d gotten the monthly retirement pensions.  Her eighty-five year-old elderly demented mother who had a stroke was left in the care of her never-married, eldest sister, who’d helped put A through her schooling to handle.  But now, her eldest sister is getting older too, and was without a job, and could no longer care for their mother.  A was grateful toward her older sister for her kindness, and thought, that the caretaking of the mother, they should shoulder together, and so, asked her husband if she could use a part of her monthly retirement pension, to put into helping her eldest sister and mother, but, the husband was strong and forceful in denying her the rights, and, put strict restrictions on her accounts.

Later on, A couldn’t put up with how her husband had insulted her own families, left her own home, and, used the money she’d earned to help make the ends of her, her eldest sister, and her mother’s livelihoods meet, but the husband said horrible things about her endlessly.  A wanted to divorce, but she couldn’t abandon her only daughter who is living and working overseas, what, is she to do?

A My Advice…

All the earnings that A brings in, was allotted by her husband, and, the husband treated his own family of origin with generosity, but, his in-laws with stingy, he’d used double-standards.  Her husband had put up the money for his own younger brother during the holidays for a very long time, and even covered the expenses of his trips abroad, and A had never said anything about it.

Four years ago, when A’s mother had surgery on her uterus, she’d put up the medical bills of $50,000N.T. herself, back then, her husband was abroad, and, he’d thrown a FIT after he’d returned, claimed that when his mother-in-law sells the house, he will get the medical expenses back.  And now, her mother became demented and had a stroke, her husband had used even harsher words, “Your mother and eldest sister are the TUMORS of our marriage!  BAGGAGE!”

This never-ending insult, caused A to be on the verge of a mental breakdown, she’d wanted divorced, but worried about the effects it would have on her grown daughter, she couldn’t make up her mind about it.

If A really wanted to divorce, her grown daughter is not the issue here, the important thing is, is there nothing left between her and her spouse.  A must make up her mind, and, making up her mind is: collect the evidence, find an attorney, to protect her own assets, to NOT end up with nothing in old age, after working hard her whole life.

And, I’d imagined that this is still a build up, the husband’s behavior toward her side of the family, and maybe, because the husband was NOT a direct member of her family, meaning that he didn’t HAVE a parent with dementia, or siblings that needed the economic supports, that, was why he was not at all understanding to his own wife’s doing things the way she’d done, and, the money she’d earned, was her, what RIGHT has her husband, to put it into a joint account?  And plus, the husband covers for his own younger brother’s living expenses, even travel fees too, so that, is double-standards that this LOSER is holding!

Slowly, She’s Forgetting…

Her memories are, drained, little, by little from her mind each and every day, and soon, we’re all afraid, that she won’t even KNOW who she is, which, is why, we’re working, real hard, tryin’ to capture the moments of her lucidity, because, we’re all afraid, of losing her, to dementia…

Slowly, she’s forgetting, first, it’s the grandchildren’s names, and, who’s kids are they, then comes, the names, of her own offspring, save for that one, you know, the one she always keeps, close to her  mind?  And then, her spouse would “go” too…

Slowly, she’s forgetting, I wish, that there are some ways, that I can make sure, that she remembers, but, the more I’d forced her to recall, the more frustrated she’d become, and, she’d become, too withdrawn, to interact with me.

Slowly, she’s forgetting, and now, I’m burdened, with the memories of her better self, and, I just can’t get over the fact, that this gray-haired woman who’s sitting in a wheelchair (as she’d forgotten how to walk too!!!) before me, once held my hand, and told me, not to be afraid…

Slowly, she’s forgetting, and, eventually, she won’t even remember WHO she is anymore, but, we will all be here, to remind her, of how much love there is, around her, how many of us (that’s still ALL of us here!!!) still cared very much so about her.

Even though, she’s slowly forgetting, we will, carry forth with the memories she had let go of, because that, is what we, her offspring, are supposed to do………

Sharing, the Biggest Kind of Blessings

How to successfully retire, translated…

Feng-Land was my classmate from teacher’s college, and we were both in the “language group”, but since we graduated and gotten to our separate schools, she’d gone to Taichung, while I’d gone into the armed services by accident, slowly, I’d drifted away from my classmates from teacher’s college, and lost contact with her as well.

Two decades later, once I’d gone, by the directions of the principal at the school I worked in, to visit a couple of the elementary schools’ principals in Kaohsiung, and I’d chatted with a principal named He, and, I’d learned, that he was, Feng-Lang’s husband.

By coincidence, awhile later, as I’d moved into a new community, I’d met Feng-Lang while she was out, strolling along with her husband, turns out, we lived only two blocks from each other, and, we, the original classmates, became neighbors.

After I’d learned, that Feng-Lang and her husband lived close by, I’d gone to their place to chit chat, to have some tea, to have some fruits, and, as I was about to leave their place each and every time, she’d had me bring along a bag of fruits and vegetables.  I feel so bad, about taking all the things from them, but, I couldn’t turn them down, after all, that was the kind of no agricultural insecticides, home-grown vegetable and fruits, hard as they were to buy on the marketplaces, and, even harder, to get them for free.

And just so, I’d gotten many calls since from Feng-Lang, wanted me to head over to her place, to pick up the vegetables, and, the assortment of produces were from their home in Menon, without the agricultural pesticides and fresh too.

Feng-Lang and her husband were both from Menon, a pair of childhood sweethearts.  They’d often taken the time, to head home, to visit their aging parents, and gone into the fields to work too, and when the timing was right, they’d brought the “fruits of their labors” home, to share.

Because we’re neighbors, and, when I’d met gotten invited to the teacher’s banquet or friends’ gathering, I’d always wanted to invite Hsiu-Lang and her husband to come with me, but, they’re too busy, and could only make the occasional appearances.

They’re both retired, what, would they have to busy themselves about on?  Other than household chores, there’s a TON for them to do!  Feng-Lang showed great interest in photograph, she’d poured her heart and soul into it, gone away to take shots of the sceneries, and, in order to capture the photos that she wanted to, she’d gone all over the island.

When Feng-Lang was out on her photography trips, her husband became her bodyguard and her driver, Feng-Lang had no worries then, and so, her skills in photography improved quickly, and, she’d gotten great remarks for her photographs.

Principal He went out with his wife on her photo shoots, and had “interned” from her, being exposed, he’d fallen in love with photography too, after he’d retired, he’d taken the leadership role, and poured his whole heart and soul into the hobby, and, the couple since then, shared this activity that they got to enjoy together.

Other than photography, they’d also did Chi-Gong, table tennis together, and, Principal He also volunteered, taught people to play the harmonica, tell the stories to the kids, they’re busy, jam-packing their retirement life, it’s no wonder, how hard it was, to get the two of them out for a meal with me.

But, no matter how busy they were, they’d always taken the time, to visit back home, to help out in the fields with the elderly, to accompany their parents, and that, is what I loved the most, because every time they’d gone back home, afterwards, I’d get a call from Feng-Lang, “Hey, come on over, to pick up some veggies!”

Being neighbors with my old classmate, it’s a very hard-to-come-by affinity, as for getting the homegrown, fresh produce without the agricultural poisons, that, is a blessing in itself.

And so, this, is what most people dream of here, to retire, and to have a patch of land, somewhere in the countryside, that they can plant fruits and vegetables on, and, this couple from above, are living out their retirement well, they have things they enjoyed separately, and things that they can enjoy together, and that, is the key, to making it work, after the two of you retired.