No Matter How Hard It Got, He Still Made His Art, a Student with Cerebral Palsy: I Found My Wings, in My Art

A story of inspiration here, to all, from the Newspapers, translated…

A severely handicapped third-year student with cerebral palsy, who is in the Public He-Mei Experimental School, in the art departments, He enjoyed going to school a lot, and, loved art more, but, his limbs are slowly, becoming more and more stiff by the day, he couldn’t draw or paint on his own, gladly, with the help of his physical therapist and art instructor, they’d made instruments to help him draw and paint, he had the chance, of developing his art skills further, and was able to, knock on the doors of related majors of the varied universities.

He lives in Nantou, in the past twelve years’ time, his mother, Ke would drive him to and from school, and help him to study in the arts.  Ke said, He loved going to school, and, even when he’d fallen ill, he still refused to take a leave of absence, several times that he was kept at home to rest up, he’d started getting upset, and her and her husband had lifted up the white flags toward their son’s requests, and, allowed her child, to “play video games to his heart’s desires, and eat whatever he wanted to,” to stop him from objecting on not being in school.

“I’d made new discoveries at school every single day!”, said He, the teacher taught him to draw, taught him how to use the computer programs to create art, although he was immobilized, his heart soared in the creations freely, he’d hoped, to be like the main character of the latest Miyazaki animated feature, to fly with the wind, to never give up, until he’d achieved his own dreams too.

Every time before he’d started creating his art, He would put on the special wrist support created for him by his art teacher, Lin, and others, and he’d used a sponge, to help him hold on to the pen that he was drawing with, dipped the brush, into the specialized foam cup, and worked hard, to “dip” onto the drawing papers, the multiple dots had formed a picture, like the Western Impressionist artworks.

He’s handicaps exacerbated by the days, and, he’d needed six to eight times more the time that regular students would take, to finish a painting, he’d taken an entire semester, to finish the watercolor piece, “Autumn”, he’d used bright colors, it was breathtaking, and he was invited to put on an art exhibition with the He-Mei Art School.

The principal, Lee, from He-Mei Art School said, that He is of normal intelligence, and knew well, that he is slowly, losing control of his own body, and, the angle to which his wrists and arms are able to move is being reduced by the day, and so, he’d started, planning his studies after he gets admitted into university, and, his spirits are moving, and he is, a role model for his peers.

And so, this high school aged kid didn’t let his handicap stop him from doing what he enjoys, and, with the accommodations made by his teachers and school, as well as with the support from his parents, he was able, to live his dreams.

My Cell Phone’s Out of Power

Translated…

Kiki’s mom often told, “Kiki could never sit still at home, would love to touch everything, and, would ask me why a lot, I just can’t handle it anymore, can you tell me, how is it, that you manage, to teach Kiki at school?”, I’d transmitted this interesting message from class to her.

The preschool class, we have a theme for the day, electronic appliances, I’d made headgears of the multiple appliances, and allowed the young kids to choose what they like, to put over their heads, and, do a roll call of the appliances, when I’d called out, “Cell phone, where are you?”, the group of children with the cell phone headgear would say, “Here, we’re here!”, only Kiki remained silent.  I asked her, “why aren’t you talking?”, she said, “My cell phone is out of power, so I can’t talk.”

I started laughing, believing, that it was a trip, for a three-year-old kid to say such a thing.  Later on, I’d told her, “Kiki, you have such a great answer, then, let teacher give you a hug, meaning that you’re recharged, okay?”

She said, “Okay, I love being a cell phone, because the teacher hugs me”.  This, is the purest kind of conversation, very childlike too.

And so, the learning experiences of a young child is based, solely off of the senses, and the discoveries in life, and, from the mommy’s cell, we can understand, “without power in the cell phones, she couldn’t talk, and feel the love from others.”, so, mom should not feel annoyed by her, instead, to fill her sense of curiosity, interact with her more, play more games with her, find Kiki’s good qualities, to help her find tap into her potential.

After Kiki’s mom heard, she’d decided to become a more patient than ever mommy, took after my way, and, recorded down her own offspring’s growth processes, with her heart.

Says WHO the younger children don’t know HOW to express themselves?  This young girl felt ignored by her mom, and, she’s showing it, in the interaction with her preschool teacher, and, the teacher was very well trained, and, she’d relayed the message to the child’s mother, so, the mother now, realized that she’d let her daughter feel ignored, and, she changed her ways.  Wonderful things can happen, when the teacher and the parents work together…

Why Be a Princess When You Can Be a Queen???

This one, is for all y’all girls out there!!!

Why be a princess, when you can be a queen???  Because a queen is put in charge, of an ENTIRE nation, while a princess, well, she can just, get dolled up, and sit pretty, as she waited for her prince to come, AND rescue her?  That, would be an EASIER life, isn’t it?

But think about it, being a queen IS being in charge, and, being a princess, well, your lives, are solely RELIANT on someone else’s behaviors, like if your man wasn’t happy, then, you’d be depressed too, because he is your sun and your skies, and, so, eventually, YOUR lives would circle around him, and that’s not yet including, ALL those little RUGRATS that you will be POPPING out for him either.

If you’re a princess, then, you’d have a BIG chance, of getting TURNED into the MAID, and, you still don’t have until MIDNIGHT, until your fantasies are O-V-E-R.  Why be a princes, IF you can be a queen?  Well, some of you might believe, that running an entire nation, overseeing EVERYTHING, big AND small in that realm, is just, way too troublesome, but hey, would you rather live under someone else’s emotional ups and downs, or, BE in charge of everything around you, that’s happening around your lives?

Why be a princess, IF you can be a queen?  That’s easy, because a queen leads, while a princess, well, a princess still sleeps, in HER state of dormancy, and, from the looks of things, well, she ain’t comin’ OUT of a COMA yet, and besides, you would NOT want to kiss a toad, and risk, turning yourselves into a frog too, would you?  Didn’t think so!!!

Is the Child’s Oversensitivity a Behavior Problem?

So this, is what the parents have to cope with, with a way-too-sensitive child at home, huh???  Translated…

“Your daughter is so very quiet—have you ever considered, taking her to the doctors?”

“Jody is so easily hurt.  If she sees that other children were picked on, she’d cried too.  When she’d heard sad stories, she’d cry.  We don’t know what to do with her.”

“Everybody in the kindergarten is eager to participate in group activities, but, your son just refused.  Is he also this stubborn at home too?”

Do these lines sound familiar?  Of course, these words can get to you, as if, your kid’s the one with the problems, but, your child has a keen sense of observation, shows a lot of care and concerns toward others, and is very sensitive.  You knew real well, that if you heed these words, forced him to get socialized, the child would be in a whole lot of pain.  And, if you go with the flow of your child’s personality characteristics, s/he might be well-off.  And still, as the same words keep coming up, you’d started doubting, whether or not you’re fitting as a parent, and that you might be responsible, for your child, behaving the way s/he does.

How to Education Children Who are Too Sensitive?

You feared, that you may be doing things wrong, worried that no one can help you.  You might have already realized, that most of the parenting books all talked about “behavioral problems”, such as getting agitated easily, distracted, rough, attacking.  From this angle, there’s NOTHING wrong with your child.  There were NO mentions of the problems you’d encountered, eating problems, being too shy, nightmares, worries, and, strong emotional outburst, for no apparent reasons at all.  And, you couldn’t discipline your child using normal methods, even IF you’d just criticized her/him lightly, your child would have a complete meltdown.

The Words of Advice from the Experts:

When people tell you, that something IS wrong with your child, don’t believe them, and don’t LET your child believe them either.  Your child is UNIQUE, that, is not your fault.  Naturally, there would be room for improvement in parent-child interaction techniques, but, don’t ever believe that something IS wrong with you, or your offspring.

Based off of studies, fifteen to twenty percent of the children in the population are born naturally sensitive.  And, with this great number, it’s hardly “abnormal”.  Besides, in ALL the species that’s been studied, there are JUST as high records of individuals in the population that are this sensitive.  And, IF that, is the result of evolution, then, there MUST be a reason for it, we just can’t see it is all.

There are many evidence that suggests, that people who are highly sensitive are NOT necessarily shy, nor are they all neurotic OR anxious all the time, or even, depressed.  For some of the more sensitive members of the population, these emotional responses are caused by environmental stimuli, NOT inborn traits.

What, is a Heightened Level of Sensitivity?

People who have a heightened level of sensitivity are more aware of the details in their surrounding environment, and, before they acted, they’d think, thoroughly first before they took the actions.  Whether it be adults or children, those who are sensitive usually have a higher level of empathy, more intelligent, has strong instincts, with creativity, more careful, with a lot of conscience.

They understood better, the result of their own actions, and so, they’re less willing, to do the wrong things.  They couldn’t cope well with higher volumes of sounds, or an influx of information coming to them at any given time.  They would avoid these stimuli, which makes them appear shy or distant from others.  If they couldn’t avoid the circumstances of being under too many stimuli, then, they’d become “difficult to deal with”, or “way too sensitive”.

Although those who are deemed more sensitive pay attention to the details more, but, they may not have a better sense of sight, hearing, taste, or smell.  But, there are those with a better ability in one of their sensory organs.  The key point here, is that when their brains processed the information, they do it more thoroughly.  Not just their brains, those who are deemed more sensitive also have a stronger spinal reflex too.  Their immune systems are more active, they are prone to develop allergic reactions to things.  Which means, that their bodies are designed, to understand and observe this world even MORE thoroughly.

So, just because your kid cries a lot, or wouldn’t play in groups, PARENTS and TEACHERS, that still doesn’t mean that there IS something wrong with the kid, something IS wrong, with Y-O-U, stupid adult, who work so totally FUCKING (oopsy!!!) hard, to FIT all those little ones, inside just ONE square, but hey, some of us are rectangles, triangles, rhombi, circles, along with an ASSORTMENT of shapes AND sizes, and, we still DON’T just FIT properly to the “norm” (whatever THAT is!!!), so STOP trying to FIT your young INTO certain boxes, and just love them for the way that they are, after all, they still did NOT ask to be BROUGHT to the “outside world”, you two ADULTS are the ones to have FUCKED, and, out still popped???  Oh yeah, those “pretty little MISTAKES” of yours, remember?  Uh, YEAH, and, D-U-H!!!

 

Cutting Off the Father-Daughter Relationship? On the Scene of the Wedding

A father, expecting his baby girl to become independent after she is wed, translated…

Yu is approaching forty, with a higher degree, with the belief, that he could achieve greatness, other than changing jobs constantly, he’d also, made a ton of investments, in the end, he’d lost more and earned even less.  In the decade’s time, we can only describe him as “barely getting by”, so, having a family, marrying, having children, buying a house became an unachievable dream for him.

Juan was Yu’s coworker when he’d first started working, maybe, she had the eyes for how willing he was able to take the challenges head on, she’d dated him, for over a decade.  And because they’re both getting older, and, with the pressings from both their families, they’d finally decided, to march down the aisles together.

In actuality, Juan who’s quite good looking, was from a well-to-do family, her parents owned a small-scaled company, and, they’re making an honest living.

On Sunday, I was invited to Yu’s wedding ceremony.  At first, it didn’t seem any different than all the other wedding ceremonies I had been invited to, most of the guests didn’t arrive until the time specified, and, after a little over thirty minutes as everybody sat down.  Followed by the ushering in of the newlyweds, parents of the groom and the bride, as well as the person holding the ceremony, getting onto the podium.

Although we’re all getting hungry, we’d still smiled, and heard the blessings; the person holding the ceremony counted out the ins and outs of his daughter’s growth processes, with the laughter, the sounds of well-wishing, applauses, and our stomachs, churning, it’s so very rowdy indeed.  Right before Juan’s father was about to be finished with his speech, he’d asked everybody to pipe down, that he had something important to announce.

Everybody thought, that it was the usual stuff, wanted his son-in-law to take good care of his daughter, and the like.  Without realizing, that he’d spoken, in a strict tone of voice, “on some levels, I’m going to, cut off relations with my daughter and my son-in-law from now on.”

All of a sudden, everybody who was there fell silent, a few seconds later, he’d continued, “After the children grow up and married, they will become self-reliant, and can no longer depend on the parents, and relied on the parents for monetary support.”

At first, I felt a bit shocked, but later on, as I thought about what the father of the bride had said, Juan’s father used an alternative method, to teach the children to learn to become “self-reliant”, he’d put his heart into making his speech, and that should be, commended.

And so, this, is quite odd, isn’t it?  Because you’d expect a father, on a wedding, to give out the well-wishes, and not how I’m going to cut you off from here on out, but, this father DOES have a point, his daughter is a grown woman, and married now, and, so, him by saying that he is cutting off relations with her is saying how she will become self-reliant, and can’t depend on him on everything like she was always able to, to resolve the difficulties in her life, and so, this father actually had the benefits of his own offspring in mind when he spoke those words.

Do the Children Really Want it, Or, are They Just Ranting, Because Other Kids Have it?

A instructional technique in classroom management, translated…

The school had recently started, in a session, a child saw how another class’s teacher taught the children to draw the woman who rose up to the moon, making her companion rabbit, and wear the pomelo skin as a hat, a couple of children kept begging me, hoping that they can do some activities, related to the Mid-Autumn Festivals.  I told them, no problem, to give me just two days, to think of the activities I can have them do; then, two days later, no child in my class reminded me, and, I’d forgotten all about it too, because of how busy I was………

I trust, that everybody has had similar experiences: seeing some specialty products on the newspapers, and felt moved, to buy.  And two choices surface: one, let go of the newspapers, and run out to get that item right now, and in the end, the thing you bought, might either be what you truly wanted, or, it could be quickly dispose of; secondly, to wait a little while, think hard, after discussions with someone on the matter, go out, get it at a later date.

And, in the realms of teaching, when we met situations like this with the kids, the adults must become consciously aware, and use their wisdom, the experiences, to decide, when the child is asking for something, is s/he really want it, or is s/he just “going along with the flow”?

Once, the school had kids make Christmas cards, and gave the different classes different colored papers, and, the colors of the papers are not identical, and the texture, varied too, so naturally, nobody has the same kind of paper to work with.  At which time, a student asked the instructor, “How come he has a certain color”, “How come my paper is this color?”, “How come her paper’s thicker………”.

I asked him, “Do you want to switch?”, he nodded, and so, I’d asked my class, to raise up their hands if they wanted a trade, there were over ten kids who raised their hands (don’t know if they’re just going along with the flow, or if they really wanted to switch), then, I’d told the class, “Sure you can trade, but, come to me, ‘on your own’ after class, and now, we must follow through with our lessons…”

And, after the class was over, those over ten kids all ran off outside, to play, I understood, that they didn’t “really” want to trade, they’re just blindly, following along.  At the start of the next period, I asked, “didn’t you guys holler on and on about trading colors?”, a lot of the students brushed me off, “We forgot,” I’d continued, “If you ‘truly’ wanted something, would you forget about it?”, the kids replied, “No, we don’t think so.”  I continued, “If your next class is computer or physical education, would you forget to go to the right classrooms or the field?”  “If we have a graduation trip next month or have a party in class, would you forget the dates?”

We all have similar experiences, because we cared about a certain things, so, no matter what, we will remember it, have it written down on a notebook, or record it down on your cell phones, this, is only natural; and if it’s not really that necessary, we would normally be under the impulse of the moment, and, would forget about it, with the passing of time, and, our emotions will calm back down slowly.

Not long thereafter, the computer instructor told the kids that there’s an adjustment, from Monday, to Friday, I’d declared it to the kids, and, they all made noises that signified that they’re unhappy about it, and you can see how the kids truly enjoyed their computer course!  And, almost every day, the kids would “harass-remind”: “Teacher, DO remember we have computer class two days from now!”  “Teacher, you must NOT forget about computer session adjustments!”, because the kids cared about the computer lessons, so, it’d stayed inside their minds constantly, and, with the class time approaching, the more excited they’d all gotten; this, is entirely incomparable to the trading of the colored papers!

Seeing how the kids are getting rowdy, and I couldn’t help but calm myself down quicker, that, was how I ran my classrooms the first year I started teaching: and, wisdom comes with the years, and now, when I saw the kids getting rowdy, I’d think first, and, get to the bottom of what the kids are really thinking of, at the same time, I’m helping the kids become more aware of their wants and desires, and needs as well.

And so, this, is still, classroom management, mixed in, with a little of psychology.  First, you NEED to know what the kids are thinking about, why are they behaving the way they are, are there any factors that are affecting them, like how they were ranting on how they wanted to trade sheets, and then, you find a way, of distracting them, and, afterwards, you ask them, if they still wanted what they said they wanted awhile ago.

Changing Tracks, Gaining the Acceptance

On parent-child interactions, translated…

This year, my eldest daughter who’s in New York, entered into TWO international clothes design competitions: she’d earned the top prize from Spain; and in her entry in Italy, she’d gotten into top ten, and in July, she will enter into the finals.  These two international clothing design competition, my daughter was the only Taiwanese person who’d earned an award, and, she could be the pride of Taiwan, I suppose!

Recalling how years ago, when my daughter asked if she could change tracks, I not only didn’t encourage her, I’d even used sarcasms and mockeries, to show how unsupportive I was of her choice in life.  I’d used my way of thought from when I was raised, to put down my own children, not believing that my kids would have what it takes, to make their own dreams come true.  But now, my daughter, used what she has herself, and gained great accolades, that, was outside of my expectations that’s for sure, other than being happy about it, it made me introspect.

All the way to the top, my eldest daughter was filled with a TON of courage and hardship confronting her choice, originally, she’d already received a master degree in physical therapy from Yang-Ming University, she’d worked at the hospitals as a physical therapist for multiple years, she was paid very well, with steady scheduling too.  Other than work, she’d taken night courses on clothing designs at Shi-Jien University at night, it took her a total of a year and a half, for her to get her degree in that.  I thought, that that, was only her hobby from outside of work, without realizing, that she’s getting closer to her own personal goals in life.

One day, she’d abruptly told me she wanted to get a master in clothing design in the States, back then, I was furious, I strongly told her no.  Because that, was totally unrelated to what she’d taken her courses in before; I recommended that she go for a speech therapist degree, or to test for a therapist certificate in the States, that, would be the right thing to do.  Plus, her two younger sisters are still in school too, and we still have yet to pay up our home loans, economically, it would be hard, for us to give her any monetary supports.  I questioned her about why she didn’t choose the clothes designs major when she’d gone to college, then, it would’ve saved her this whole detour.  She asked us, “Would you have agreed?”

But, my daughter refused to get beaten, for her own dreams, she’d quitted her job at the hospitals, and entered into the economics department’s clothes design competition in Taiwan, she’d gotten first place in the 2010 competitions, at the same time, she’d passed her TOEFL exams, and sent her applications to two of the namely clothes designs graduate schools, and she’d gotten accepted in both, and was offered scholarships too, in the end, she’d chosen to head to New York to take courses in Parsons School of Designs.

And here, I want to give some advice, based off of my own experiences, respect, and believe in your own children, don’t be like me, careful on everything to the point of being unsupportive.  As parents, we should learn to let go when we are supposed to, allowing our kids to do what they enjoy, and, younger generations, if you still have dreams, go ahead, go after them!

And no, you still didn’t hear THIS from me, this, was the experience of a mother, who was all too UNSUPPORTIVE of her own offspring’s dreams, but, her daughter did NOT let the parents’ expectations beat her down, she still went AFTER her own dreams, and now, she’s an achieved clothes designer, she’d made it to the top, and now, the mother looks back, and see how wrong she was, and, had she been just a bit MORE supportive, then………well, it’s too late for that now, because we will eventually grow up, and then, we will NOT need you, parents, anymore!