Monthly Archives: July 2014

The Choices From Way Back When, a Unique Way of Educating Children

 

Translated…

Since I was a child, I’d taken up martial arts with my father instructing me, my father’s generation who was taught using Japanese values, his training processes were strict, and there was NO laughter or smiles either.  Many years later, I’d graduated from the physical education department, and became a boxing coach too, I’d carried the way that my father trained me with, but I’d placed a stronger emphasis on character education.

My son who’d been white and fat when he was a baby, was extremely lovable, he was hovered over by the elders.  In NOT controlling his diets, as he’d gone into middle school, he’d already passed the 170 pound marker.  He was so used to being looked after and being taken care of, he started caring about NOTHING, and, every time he’d met a fork in the road, he’d given up.

I feared, that I might raise my next generation to be slacking, and a leech, I believed, that he needed a total makeover on his lifestyle, and so, I took him to the boxing ring.  As he’d entered the ring, he must say his respective words to the elders, then, started with cleaning up the environment, keeping the equipments, then, calculate the times, getting the water, carrying the punching bags, etc., etc., etc.………After he’d started working the odds and ends for a short while, he’d started getting trained with the boring, but fundamental moves.  At first, my son had a LOT of complaints, sure, but, he knew, that including his dear old dad, along with all other outstanding fighters started out like so, he’d slowly agreed to his training methods.

In his training, my son witnessed those competitors at the national and international levels show their hard-working stamina, and are disciplined very well, with a TON of hard trainings, that no ordinary persons can possibly manage, and he’d finally understood, that outstanding performances don’t just fall from the skies, they come from years of training and hard work.

 But, because of his lack of talents, my son never made it to the top of the sports ring, but, started in those boxing days, he’d been trained to focus, and perfectionism, I couldn’t have asked for anything else, and, no amount of money I pay, can get that sort of an amazing results.

And now, he’s about to graduate from the graduate department of a public university, his positive attitude toward life, his classmates and professors loved about him.

The saying, “Having good habits beats having a good fate!”  even though, I don’t have any great amount of money to leave my son, but, I’m glad, I’d taken him to sports training when he was younger.

Like all the sports, it requires great discipline to manage, and so, this father took his son to training, NOT because he expected him to end up as a top fighter, but he just wanted his son to get rid of his laziness, and, the child carried what he’d learned (not the fighting skills, of course) from the years before into his life now, and the son now has a good attitude, and that, was all due to how his father took him to training from when he was younger.

 

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Filed under Awareness, Because of Love, Behavior Modifications, Cause & Effect, Child Development/Education of Children, Cost of Living, Education, Expectations, Family Matters, Hobbies/Pasttimes, Lessons, Life, Maturation, Nature vs. Nurture, Observations, Parenting/Parenthood, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Self-Images, Socialization, Sports, Story-Telling, Translated Work, Values

How Writing Helps with the Healing Process, the Growth of a Woman

Translated…

“Mom, was I outstanding yesterday or what!”, about two years ago, I was given the diagnosis of “terminal stage of cancer” with absolutely NO time for me to prepare of this.  After my husband who’s had a stroke heard, he was really shocked, but, when I’d told my son, who’d just started working, he was extraordinarily calm, and the very next day, he’d told me his way of thought about the issue, “Mom, these couple of years you’d written a lot of articles, and, you must have thought about every and anything that could happen in life, and, you’d managed to carry yourself in dad’s illness too, I’m quite certain, that you won’t get beaten by this either.”

His words engraved into my mind, and even though, in these two years, the process of treatment was extremely hard for me to take, and still, I was able to visit my mindset a lot from the younger days, to use positive thought, to help myself through the difficulties.

Seven years ago, on the verge of retirement, a good friend invited me to join in their group of “part-time writers”, and, I wasn’t very good a writer, but, I’d taken the mindset of “I got nothing ELSE better to do anyway”, to start writing after I retired, and sent in my articles via the web, and the very first one I’d written was selected by the newspapers.

Later, I found, that the kind of writing I wanted to do, “spiritual writing”, a couple of newspapers had a medium for.  In not minding about getting my scripts returned back to me, I’d started reproducing in mass volume.  In the first year, my best friend and I encouraged each other, and with some friendly competition with her, both of us had shows for it.  The second year, us old “gray-haired ladies” continued on this fun “competition”, other than writing for the specific topics, entered into related newspaper article entries, reading reports, we’d also done, and it’d allowed us to read a TON of great books too.

And on top of that, a essay contest from a restaurant gave us both rewards, and we’d gotten to enjoy a free Mother’s Day meal.  Slowly, I’d found more and more “articles needed” messages online, and, I’d started sending my stuff into the national forums.  What made me most proud was, that once we’d both entered into a writing contest sponsored by the government agencies, and we’d both won, and gotten called to receive the awards, and published a book together too.

Other than the joys from winning the awards, there are bigger rewards from writing itself, other than retrospect on what had happened to oneself in life, I was able to examine things even more closely too, and managed to keep myself and my mind sharp.  And, my bad moods, they usually get taken care of after I write, and my views toward my own life became more and more positive too, and I’d become more and more forgiving toward others as well.

What’s even more accidental was, these couple of years, after I’d had huge issues in life, I could pass them without that much difficulties.  Yesterday, I went to the hospital to pick up my annual health check reports, and I’d gotten “you’re okay now” from the doctor, it’s as if there’s a brand new window that’s opened up by my life.  I think, “writing to my spirits” had done what it was supposed to, I must keep going in writing!

Because by writing things out, you’re not keeping it in, and, when you kept everything on the inside, that, is when your bodies are likely to go wrong, and, by writing, you’d found an outlet, so, you’re no longer keeping everything bottled up, which helps you get healthier, and you just need a pen and a notebook to get yourselves better, this, is way cheaper than T-H-E-R-A-P-Y that’s for sure!

 

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Filed under Awareness, Cause & Effect, Interpersonal Relations, Lessons, Life, Observations, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Stories of Hope, Story-Telling, Translated Work, Turning One's Life Around, Values, Writing

Moments Before You Wake

Moments before you wake, you were dreaming, as I watched you.  Moments before you wake, you whispered something underneath your breath, and I tried making it out, but, I couldn’t…

Moments before you wake, you were lost in your nightmares, sweating it out real hard, and, you woke me up, I put my hand over your forehead, to wipe away the sweat, and, you fell fast back to dreams again.

Moments before you wake, what did you dream about?  Her, isn’t it?  Even when you’re sleeping NEXT to me, your mind and heart are still with her, and that just hurt me, real bad, why can’t you love me the way you love her?  After all, I AM your wife (uh, yeah right, and, get R-E-A-L!!!), and she’s your W-H-O-R-E, and, I know about her too!

Moments before you wake, what was it like, are you STUCK between waking up, and halfway OUT of your dreams, did you get lost, like when you tramped into that labyrinth of green?  Did you feel that sense of panic, because you thought you were NEVER going to see me again?

Moments before you wake?  Well, you’re WIDE awake now, aren’t you?  And, it’s my time to SLEEP, I’d spent the ENTIRE night, watching you, and frankly, I’m really tired right now…

 

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Filed under Coping Mechanisms, Creative Writing, Life, Relationship, Story-Telling, Writing

They Couldn’t Kill Enemies Together in Virtual Reality and in Reality, the Thirty-Eight Year Old Father Killed His Own Sixteen-Year Old Son

 

There ARE better ways, to CONNECT TO your child, you DO realize that, don’t you???  From the Front Page Sections, translated…

The sixteen-year-old son invited the thirty-eight year old father to play an online strategy game, they got into an argument, the father three the machines away told the son, “You will NOT play it again!”, then, he went to the kitchens, grabbed a kitchen knife, stabbed his own son twice on the chest.

The father-son pair, Liu yesterday stayed up all night long, got drunk, and played an online game where they’d posed as characters from the Sanguo Era, fighting their way out from being ambushed together.  The son was displeased at how the father didn’t come and offer him assistance, causing him to get killed in the game, blamed his father for not knowing how to play, and Liu got embarrassed and then angered, picked up a kitchen knife, and stabbed his own son in the chest twice in a row, and, a game where they’re supposed to share “quality time” together had become a tragedy where the father killed the son.

The teenager, Liu went to a private technical high school’s night department, he will become a junior after the summers, he’s outgoing, interacted very well with his classmates and school instructors.  He’d once disclosed to the school’s disciplinary officer and his homeroom teacher that he’d gotten into arguments with his father because of how different their values are, and at the beginning of this month, the school intervened to counsel them, and, the tragedy was the last thing they’d expected to have happened, after the school instructors learned of this, they were all very saddened.

The police investigated, that yesterday early morning, the father-son pair were drinking together, the thirty-eight year-old father started playing online games, and the sixteen-year-old son was playing video games; later on, the son invited the father to play “Real, Pair of Excellent Fighters from the Sanguo Era”, and, they’d both picked fighting generals and got their ways into the enemies’ campsites.

Because it was the first time that the father’s played the game, he wasn’t familiarized with the buttons or how the game worked, and couldn’t offer his son the help he was needing, and, the son got killed in the game, the son got angered, and blamed his father, “Can’t you even play?  There were arrows, pointing on the map, to tell you where to go…”

“It was my very first time playing, I don’t know how to go over to you to help you out!”, Liu’s father got angered, and shouted back to his own son, he’d rammed the machines against the floor and broke it, and, said to his son that he shall never play the game ever again.l  After the pair got into a serious argument, the father ran to the kitchens and grabbed a sashimi knife, pointed it toward his son, they were still shouting at each other.  The stepmother who lived with them woke from her dreams, and tried to console both men.

Without knowing, that as his son went up to him to try to get the knife away, in the chaos, Liu managed to stab his own son twice in the chest.  The father who was all worked up, saw his son fell into a puddle of blood, he became wide awake, quickly took his shirt off, and applied pressure on his son’s knife wound, to try to stop the bleeding.

The stepmother called 119 immediately to ask for help, and took the son to the E.R., but it was already too late.  Liu’s father was charged with murder, and took into the precinct for questioning, his eyes became dumb, and couldn’t speak a word.  After the police interrogated him, he was charged with murder and taken into custody, the D.A. set the bail at $200,000N.T., but the amount was too high and the family couldn’t manage to get that much, it was lowered to $60,000N.T.

The family pointed out, that about a decade ago, the youth’s parents divorced, and the child was raised by his aunt and maternal grandmother, it wasn’t until he was in the first year of middle school, did he move back in with his own father; later, the father who works as a construction painter remarried, he’d gotten very well along with his stepmother too.

And so, you still get, how A-L-C-O-H-O-L would be the CULPRIT that caused this “story” to turn bad, right?  I mean, had the two men not been drinking, then, maybe, the argument would NOT have gotten out of hand, but, alcohol impairs the judgment, and it can make people perceive things that aren’t really there, and so, that, would be how alcohol had secondhandedly, caused this murder of the son by the father.

 

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A Father Took His Five-Year-Old Daughter to Jump a Ditch, and Was Forcibly Hospitalized

 

And that still makes you an UNFIT parent!!!  From the Front Page Sections, translated…

A man, Jiang, who’s been diagnosed as emotionally unstable, was displeased at how his wife kept ignoring him, he’d set his house on fire, then, used a screw driver, took his daughter hostage, and jumped, with her, into a deep ditch, and was in a stand-off with the police for two whole hours; and the police took advantage of the time when they’re handing him a cigarette, to carry the little girl who’s shocked away, and forced him into the hospital, after he was charged with public endangerment.

“Would daddy burn us to death?”, every time the child spoke of her uncertainties, the family would also fear; in order to prevent any more threatening behaviors from Jiang to his family, the families hoped he could get the complete care and hospitalizations he will require.  The Sanitary Department stated, that they will get a medical doctor’s opinion on the matter, then, see if there’s a need for forced hospitalization.

The man in charge of the Center for Domestic Violence Prevention, Lin pointed out, that last year, they’d listed the Jiang household as a high-risk family, and had sent social workers to visit them regularly, and giving them counsel and the situations are improving, and that Jiang had lost it two days ago, they’d already helped Jiang’s wife and kids by filing an emergency restraining order against Jiang.

The police investigated and found, that the thirty-eight year-old man had been unemployed and stayed at home for awhile now, and the household relied on outside charity, along with government assistance to get by; recently, Jiang’s personality had changed, and every time he’d gotten into a disagreement with his families, he would start throwing things, and had multiple times, set fires to his own place of residence.

Even though, the family had multiple times, scheduled him for hospital stays, but he’d always manage to sneak out.  The nurses from the public sanitations department had three-times, helped him to get hospitalized, but, he’d locked the bedroom doors from the inside, and, the nurses considered that he might be emotionally unstable, and so, they’d left him alone, and didn’t force their way into his room.

At the start of the month, Jiang first used a knife to threaten to kill his own wife, on the 24th, he’d set his own house on fire, the D.A. allowed him to make bail.  Two days ago, in the morning, Jiang was displeased at how his wife ignored him when she was cooking, he’d committed arson once more, and had used a screw driver, and forcefully took his own five-year-old daughter, and jumped into the ditch next to his house, claimed that he will take his own daughter to die with him.

Jiang had several times, pushed his daughter’s head under water as threats.  And, the patrol officers who were called to the scene worked hard to console him, wanted him to think more on his own, along with his daughter’s behalf, and asked his wife and made communication between the couple possible, but they’d still argued nonstop.

The police saw how shocked the little girl was, and was struggling and wailing in her father’s arms, and the police pretended to hand Jiang a cigarette, wanting him to calm down so they can talk; as Jiang reached for the cigarettes, the officer managed to get the child, and, the rest of the crew rushed up, and pulled him onto the ambulance that took him to the city’s care facility, and the child who was still under shock was sent back with Jiang’s eldest brother.

And so, because you were unstable, you jeopardized your own child’s life, what SORT of a father are you?  And, you SHOULD be forcibly hospitalized, whether or NOT you like it, because something IS wrong with you, after all, you’d made your families live in fear for their lives every single day, and that, is how there are still so many unstable adults, and, the ones who suffered the most are still the kids!

 

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Rebuilding Their Small Apartment Compound, the Couple Opened Up a Whore House

 

Pimping AND whoring here, from the Newspapers, translated…

A couple, the Chuangs, owned and operated a call station in Sanchung, Chuang would entice the customers, while his wife stays at home, took care of the kids, and at the same time, making sure the ladies go to wherever they needed to go.  The call station has good business, and Chuang had even asked for a “lender call girl” from an executive of a bar, Shih, they’d offered one another the help.  The police got an anonymous call, and chased down the leads, arrested all three persons involved.

The police investigated that Chuang (age 42) found that the private whore house, “Bean Curd House” had been taken down, and that there are still a lot of “customers” in the area.  He believed, that if he could “bring back the old days”, then, it would be a lucrative business, and so, he’d remodeled his old apartment complex into rooms, and opened up a whore house, to make money. In order to make a name for himself, he’d claimed to the “outside world” that “all the ladies here are in their twenties from Taiwan”, but the police had once gotten a call from a man who’d gone, complaining that he’d been “lied to” by Chuang; turns out, that the ladies working under Chuang are all in their thirties.

“There were men coming over to pick up different ladies, it’s so weird!”, the Wanhua Police got a tip, claiming that at a building on Si-Ning S. Road, there were weird people, coming in and out, and the police looked into it, and found, that it was the pickup services to get the call girls.  The police followed them, set up an ambush, and, this Tuesday, they’d gone to Sanchung, and arrested Chuang and two others, and took his six whores under arrest, and they were all punished.

And so, this, is why sex still sells, because there’s always going to be a HUGE demand, after all, who wouldn’t PAY for a one-night stand, and, I’m betting, that those ladies, they must be very well trained too, to know HOW to please men, and, that still just shows how EASILY it is, for someone to be sold, and, with the internet, it would even BE easier, you don’t even need a P-I-M-P, if you know how to utilized the internet!

 

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Filed under Being Exposed, Sex Sells, Social Awareness, Social Issues, Solicitations, Unsafe Neighborhoods, Vicious Cycle, White Picket Fence

Keeping Her Protected Forever

Keeping her protected, forever, because she’s my little girl, and I will NEVER, EVER-E-V-E-R, allow ANY kind of harm to come to her, not unless it’s over MY dead B-O-D-Y!!!

Keeping her protected, forever, there’s NOTHING I wish more than that, but, as she grows up, little, by little every single day, well, I feel her, slipping farther, and farther still away.  Keeping her protected, forever, that, is what I will do, because if I don’t, then, I would NOT be a good AND fitting mother to my own child.

Keeping her protected forever, but H-O-W?  Is there a way, that I can protect her, to keep her away from harm, from her getting hurt by anything, including L-O-V-E?  Probably N-O-T, and so, as she grows, little, by little every single day, there is NOTHING I can do, but to let go slowly, even if it’s in my desire, to hold on, forever, I know I can’t!!!

 

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Filed under Because of Love, Family Matters, Parent-Child Interactions, Parenting/Parenthood, Properties of Life, Values, Vicious Cycle

Americans’ Views Toward Muslims Have Gotten Worse…

From NBCNEWS.com

How Americans view Arabs and Muslims has gotten worse in recent years, with negative feelings strongest among Republicans and senior citizens, according to a poll released on Tuesday.

Only 27 percent of Americans have a favorable opinion of Muslims, down from 35 percent in 2010, according to the Zogby poll, commissioned by the non-profit Arab American Institute. Favorable attitudes towards Arabs dropped to 32 percent from 43 percent in 2010.

The poll also found that 42 percent of respondents believe an American Muslim’s religion would influence his or her decision making in an important government job. The same percentage believe it is justified for law enforcement to profile Arab Americans or American Muslims.

The poll also found sharp partisan, racial and generational divides.

For example, 59 percent of Republicans and 53 percent of people 65 or older agree with profiling Arab Americans or Arab Muslims, compared with 32 percent of Democrats and the 18-29 age group. Only 29 percent of non-whites favor profiling, compared with 47 percent of whites.

The poll surveyed 1,110 likely voters in late June, with a margin of error of plus or minus 3 percentage points.

-Reuters

And, even though, this article did NOT discuss, in-depth about WHAT the cause of this animosity that Americans feel toward Muslims are, but, I believe, it’s still because of the grudge, because how we all carry the memories of how people ARE hurt on other occasions, and, the only W-A-Y to resolve this discrimination problem would be, oh yeah, a no opinion either way, but you’d already formed YOURS, and so, you will NOT be able to change, even IF there are “minorities” of the subculture that are different, you’d still BE convinced that those “minorities” are rare encounters, and that, is how hard it is, to BREAK that stereotype you have toward something…

 

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Filed under Awareness, Discriminations, Issues of the Society, Messed Up Values, Perspectives, Professional Opinions, Trends, Values, Wake Up Calls

Fighting Over Volunteering Opportunities: What the Children Gained from the Experiences Relied on the Adults’ Guidance

From the Front Page Sections, translated…

I read up on the column of “summer time volunteer work, what’s IN right now”, I have some opinions on the matter.  Actually, in the processes of getting into college from high school, with volunteering experiences, this adds a few points to the total scores, and this policy had been in place, for many years already, and, it’s on the right tracks too, hoping that through volunteering, the students will better understand what giving to the world is all about.

The society is now, advocating the work of volunteers, and, even though, these volunteers can achieve a lot of things, there’s still a need to get the story out, so the parents and the students can better understand the meaning behind having to volunteer, and, when enforcing the “rules”, the procedures must be followed, step-by-step as well.

Like when I’d work at the libraries, we’d had to set up a system of volunteering, to allow the student volunteers act as janitors, to shelve the books, to sort through older books, to set up a sign in book, I would assist the students from the side, and, at the end of their term, I’d sent a certificate out to the schools’ departments, and, so the schools can hand out certificates of achievements for the students’ volunteer services, so the students would know, that the school takes pride in them, volunteering and helping out.

We must NOT overlook the abilities of children, and just see ourselves as taking the lead, so long as we’d given them clear and precise steps to follow, they’ll handle the matters very well.  If the adults are fearful of troubles, or that the adults didn’t want to take responsibilities for monitoring, and allowing the students to get their proof of volunteering, then, it would, instead, teach them that there are shortcuts they can take, to get to where they want to be, which defeats the purpose of volunteering.

And so, we must set up a good example for the younger generations to follow, should we not?  But, how many adults (boy, am I glad I’m NOT one!!!) out there actually showed the kids, that hey, I really DO care, by helping someone out?  Not very many, is still my guess, and that, is why this policy is still NOT quite working right, it’s set up right, sure, but, it’ll take longer, for the school teachers, the parents, and other nonteaching officials, to get the hang of it, and by them, how many graduating classes would have come to pass?  Nobody K-N-O-W-S!!!

 

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Filed under Education, Government, Policies, & Politics, Professional Opinions, Properties of Life, Reforms in Education, Social Awareness, Values

You’re the Only Mom I Have

 

The role of a stepmother, easily handled, for this woman, translated…

Kiki is forty-five years old, and a hairstylist, back when she was in her twenties, she’d started owning her own hair salon.  At age thirty-something, she’d met a man her age, and they’d dated for no more than six short months, and married.

After she married, she’d found out, that her husband has a daughter of not-yet-six, she felt cheated by him, because her husband’s side of the family never told her about this child, and even though, before they were wed, she’d seen the little girl several times, she’d also failed to connect the dots.

She said, that after she’d learned, it was like her skies fell on top of her, she thought that she’d become a stepmother, she felt taken and lost.  She has yet to have a child, and will now be, taking care of someone else’s child, a child in her kindergarten years.  She’d often heard of how hard it is to be a stepmother, and she didn’t want to end her marriage either, and so, she thought really hard, about the next steps she is to take.

This girl is somewhat of an introvert, would often look at people with those bright and shiny eyes of hers, slowly, Kiki felt that being a stepmother isn’t that horrid after all.  After the child entered elementary school, she didn’t do too well, she’d asked her stepdaughter if she wanted to go to cram school?  The child didn’t want to, and so, she’d hired her a private tutor, to help her with her homework and studies.  And, after her husband found out, he got angry at Kiki, believed that it was a waste of time and money.  Kiki said, “I’ll be responsible for the fees, why are you so angry?”

The husband would often have a sour face toward this daughter, either that he’d ignored her completely, or that he’d barked out mean words at her, and as Kiki watched, she felt really bad for her stepdaughter, and would tell her husband, that the child is innocent, and that without her mother, it must be even harder for her, and, as her father, he should love her even more, but the man just wouldn’t listen.

After her daughter went into middle school, her grades became stabilized.  In order to encourage her, Kiki would often give her allowances, buy her new clothes, and inquire if she’s having trouble with schoolwork or not, but her husband believed her actions to be a waste, and the two of them would often spat about everything relating to the child.  The worst time they’d argued was when her daughter wanted to go to a technical high school, and her husband said that he didn’t have enough money, and wouldn’t let Kiki help out, insisted that the daughter find a way to support herself, put herself through school, in the end, the child applied for financial aid, and worked part-time while she’d gone to school.

Last year, the child’s birth mother said she wanted to see her, but the child refused.  She said, “she’d abandoned me, I don’t want to see her.”, and, NO matter how hard Kiki tried to consult her stepdaughter, “No matter what, she’s still your mom.”, and the daughter looked at Kiki, with her eyes turning red, said, “I only have you as a mom!”, and, right at that moment, Kiki’s tears began to fall, she was moved, and her heart ached for her stepdaughter’s sake at the same time.

Kiki collected herself, told the child, “Your words are the BEST kind of a gift that anybody had given me this lifetime.”  She begged and pleaded with the child, to go see her mother just once, to avoid having regrets later on in life.  Later, the daughter went to see her birth mom, and, Kiki was very glad, that she had finally moved her stepdaughter.

Because in the child’s mind, the stepmother was the one who kept fighting for her, and, that, was why they’re so very close, and, this woman was right in getting her stepdaughter to go see her own biological mother, because she didn’t want her stepdaughter to carry the regrets of not having done so for the rest of her life.

 

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Abandonment of Children, Cause & Effect, Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Family Dynamics, Family Matters, Issues of the Society, Life, Observations, Parent-Child Interactions, Parenting/Parenthood, Perspectives, Stories of Hope, Story-Telling, Values