Category Archives: On Being Single

We are NOT troublemakers, we’re merely SINGLE, and the reasons for W-H-Y we are, is still of NOBODY’s business BUT our own!!!

Living a Good Life Alone, the Story of a “Cougar”

There’s still NOTHING wrong with being S-I-N-G-L-E, translated…

There are a lot of unwed ladies around me, they’re those who are labeled, “cougars”, but, their lives are filled with amazing things.

Jen has a master from the States, is currently working in an American company, as a public relations personnel.  Because Jen worked in the media for over a decade, she was familiar with how the industry worked, and, because she spoke perfect English, and so, as she changed tracks, she adapted well, it’d allowed her to have more time, to enjoy her life, her way.  Jen loved gourmet foods, music, and other than going dining in high-end restaurants and music halls, she’d taken trips abroad twice every year, there are her footprints all over Europe, she lived up to the reputation of the “single noble”.

Man too, worked in the media industry, with a driven character, but as she’d gotten older, she started feeling that there’s MORE to life than just work, and so, she’d changed tracks to work as a publicist in an English cramming school.  She’d used the money she’d saved up from the decades of work she’d had, took out a loan, bought a small apartment complex in the suburbs of Taipei, on the weekends, she’d stayed in her garden, fixing up the plants, and cook her own meals; on long breaks, she’d headed out with her hiking buddies to hike up the top hundred peaks in Taiwan, kept enriching her own life.

And, my hair designer, Ting is a supporter of the “Singles”.  In her view, there are too many things she wants to do with her life, and, taking care of a husband and children was NEVER one of her considerations.  Other than her job at the salon, she’d also done the hairstyles for the stage performers.  Other than that, she loved to draw, and, on the weekends, she’d stayed at home to draw; she’d also wanted to take up the violin.  Her biggest wish is to save up on enough for her retirement, so she could pursue all of her interests after she retired.

I’m slowly coming to understand what the ancient belief of “No doubts in one’s forties”, because as we reached this age, we became more clear on what it is, we’re seeking in our lives.  And, for us, unmarried ladies, for whatever reasons there may have been for why none of us got married, the important thing, is to have a good life, living as a single person.

So, being single IS an amazing thing, after all, we ALL have our considerations in why we chose to marry or to stay single, and, so long as you can find hobbies to occupy your times like the women in this article has, then, you will be fine, and, STOP focusing on what you don’t have (a marriage, a family, kids???), and start looking AT what you have (free time on your hands, money to travel, to treat yourselves well).

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Filed under Awareness, Connections, Fate, Hobbies/Pasttimes, Life, Nonconformity, Observations, On Being Single, Properties of Life, Self-Images, Story-Telling, Translated Work, Trends, Values

Lock-Down, a Short Prose

Translated…

She doesn’t want to see him again, and so, she’d blocked him on her Facebook pages, then, ever since that day, people had been sending messages to her, “We heard you’d blocked him, is that true?”, “Does he know that you’re still mad?”, “I thought you’d forgiven him already.”, “Actually, I never really liked him either!”, “The truth about that sort of a man is…”, “Don’t feel too sad,”…………and, messages like these NEVER stopped coming ever since.

And so, this, would be ONE problem of Facebook, or any OTHER form of social network, because everybody KNOWS what you’re up to, and, even when you want some PRIVACY, some QUIET time to yourself, you can’t get it, because WHAM, someone’s going to ask you something about the one you’d ditched, and that will just open up that OLD wound again, wouldn’t it???

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Filed under Being Alone, Being Exposed, Facebook, Life, Moods, Emotions, & Feelings, Observations, On Being Single, Suppressed Memories, Translated Work, Trends, Vicious Cycle, White Picket Fence

Guilty for Being Single

Why am I guilty, for being single, and, isn’t that the same as saying you’re GUILTY for being “colored”?  Guilty for being single, because others will perceive you as a threat, as you’re highly desired, but they’re UNTOUCHABLE, because they’re already WITH someone ELSE, and so, those “others”, they turned against you.

Guilty for being single, because you’re unwanted, you’re flawed, and you desperately wanted to be “taken home” (like that pet that’s overlooked time and time again at the shelter and is one-step away from getting EUTHANIZED).

Guilty for being single, but W-H-Y?  Why MUST I feel guilty, just because I’m attractive (yeah, I still let THAT go to my BIG head!!!), because I can turn EVERY man’s head, and I still don’t gotta take ANYTHING off, save for my FREAKIN’ skull, to EXPOSE my B-R-A-I-N-S?

 

 

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Filed under On Being Single, Properties of Life, Stupidity

The Second Spring for May

Finding the love that’s right for you, after the last one had gone wrong, learning to love again, translated…

Hsien got married after he’d fallen in love with a woman, after they wed, they lived happily, but, after his wife, May had given birth to FOUR daughters consecutively, the marriage started going downhill.

Hsien is the eldest grandson from a huge family, his grandfather was a namely landowner of his area. The grandfather told him, that if they had a son, then, this eldest grandson from Hsien will get an extra share of his assets, and so, he’d decided to have another son, and May was under the risk of being an older pregnant woman, and had gotten pregnant with a fifth, but, after the prenatal checks, the doctors told her that the fetus was abnormal, and so, she painstakingly got an abortion, and the doctor also warned May, that with her health conditions, she should NOT be fitting, to get pregnant again.

After the dreams of having a son shattered, Hsien turned cold toward May, and had gone to across the straits for business. He’d brought some money, gone alone there, and quickly, he’d met up with a bar girl there, after the two started cohabiting together, he’d followed her back to her hometown to invest, and opened up a hotpot shop. He’d falsely claimed to his family members in Taiwan, that it was a business venture with another person from Taiwan, and had used the excuse of needing more funding, to have May wire money to China from time to time too.

Until Hsien managed to have a son with this other woman, did the whole thing blow wide open. And Hsien thought, that he now had the ACE of having a son, that his family would be behind him, without realizing, that his family members got ANGERED at how badly Hsien had misbehaved, they’d ALL sided with May instead. His grandfather, due to anger, openly denounced Hsien’s right to inherit his money.

At which time, the hotpot shop that Hsien helped started in China bankrupted because of bad management, the bar girl sold the shop, kicked Hsien out, and went back to her own mother’s house with her son. Hsien had lost everything, money, and love, and he’d returned to Taiwan, like he’d just awaken from a dream, because he was too ashamed of his own behaviors, he couldn’t face his own ex-wife and his daughter, he’d left a signed divorced agreement, and, disappeared.

As for May, who was heartbroken by Hsien’s betrayals, gladly, she’d gained the support of her family members, slowly gotten out of the gloom, she’d found a job again, and on her ride to work every morning, she’d met up with a single bus driver, and the bus driver showed empathy and compassion toward her predicament, and started pursuing her, and May had finally found a man who really DO love her now. Awhile ago, I’d met up with May, she couldn’t hide her happiness, as she’d told me that they’re about to get wed. Seeing how she glowed, I truly wish her nothing BUT the best.

And here, as you CAN see, payback (or karma, if you want to call it that!!!) is still a B-I-T-C-H!!! And, the man had it coming, because he’d left HIS wife who couldn’t give him a son (once again, this, is still the traditional sexist views working!!!), he’d dumped his wife, and shacked UP with a WHORE in China, and, after the whore in China used him up, well, she’d tossed him out, just as he’d abandoned HIS own wife, and, if that’s not karma, I don’t know what is!!!

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When Cupid’s Arrows Hit

A tale of marriage, translated…

On a certain year, my roommate told me, with this persistence, “Before the year’s up, I shall find myself a man and marry!”

I’d treated her claims as a joke, didn’t pay it much mind. In the following days, my roommate started actively engaging herself into matchmaking activities, and she’d met someone, but, because her older sister was against him, she’d ended it with him, and later on, at a dinner party, she’d met someone whom she was truly in love with.

At the start of their relationship, in order to avoid the awkwardness, my roommate had asked a wingman, me, along, I’d agreed! On the day we’d met, “truthful and honest”, was the first impression I got of him. My roommate asked me in private what I’d thought about the two guys, “Someone you can consider”, I’d told her. Later, she’d asked me to go out again, but I felt unfitting as the wingman, and so, I’d turned her down.

My roommate who’d gotten all dolled up, radiated of beauty because she was in love, I’d thought, that the woman got dolled up, for something as miniscule as this. Date after date, they’d become steady, and, around the New Years, she DID, manage, to marry herself.

Another colleague had been single for multiple years, and once had the eyes for a male coworker, but, it was one-sided. Later, she’d changed tracks, and, her love life started blooming! Because of her running sales calls, she’d gotten so very involved with her clients, and it’d enlarged her social circles.

A friend proclaimed his love for her, “Do you want to be my girlfriend?”, my colleague didn’t answer. A few days later, this friend called her up again, “Can you PLEASE be my girlfriend?”, my colleague told him, that she only wanted to be friends.

“And, was his friend also interested in you”, I’d inquired.

My colleague said, “I think so.”

A few months later, my colleague was going steady, I asked her curiously, “Which one was it?”

“The one I’m into.”, she’d replied.

Turned out, that the friend of the friend she was set up on a date with was also interested in her, and after they’d gone out a couple of times, they really connected. But, because later on, we’d lost contact, but, I’d gotten to know, that my colleague had married him. A few years later, the two of us met up once more, she’d invited me to her house. She’d NOT only found a good man, she’d also had a daughter, and is currently pregnant with her second child.

And, all I can say, is that when Cupid’s arrows HIT, you can’t DODGE it!

And that, is how THAT relationship works out, and the woman although, eager to get married, was also allowing herself the time to get to know the men she was dating, and, in the end, she was able to find the one who was a good match with her, that just still shows, that you CANNOT rush things.

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March 29, 2014 · 4:11 am

A Sixty-Eight Year Old Male Posed as a Rich Man, Scammed Three Cougars

Wow, are you STUPID, or, are you just, S-T-U-P-I-D???  From the Front Page Sections, translated…

A man, Yeh, proclaimed himself as the CEO of a company, in the fast-food restaurants, coffee shops, started enticing the population of divorced women from China, to seduce the ladies, to fall into the traps of love, then, used the name of making investments to borrow money from them, in two short years, he’d managed to scam over ten million dollars from three divorcees.  The police followed the leads, and caught him, and when he was arrested, he told them that he was set up.

The Taipei City Detective Squad pointed out, that Yeh (age 68) printed the “Thai-Asian Dual Star International Development Agency” CEO business cards, it’d made the ladies really believed that he was the man in charge of the developments next to the Taipei Main Station; Yeh found that many Chinese married woman after they’d gotten their national identification cards are mostly divorced or widows, they’d become lonely, and so, he’d falsified his image as a rich man, and zoomed in on those divorced or widowed women to scam them for money, using love as an excuse.

In the past two years, Yeh had utilized the fast-food restaurants in Taipei, the coffee shops, the super convenience shops, to connect with Wang, Chang, along with one other divorced Chinese women.  First, Yeh would take out the business card to trick them, painted a picture of him, as well-knowledged, well-connected individual, then, he’d asked them out and pursued them endlessly, stated that he wanted to marry them, and have babies with them, and would give them residences at highly priced districts too.

Wang, Chang, along with another Chinese spouse thought that they’d found the second love of their lives, after they’d invested their emotions, Yeh would tell the ladies, that his business had monetary difficulties that he needed the cash flow, to convince the women to make an investment, then, he’d taken out the checkbooks, to prove that he had the intentions of marrying all of them, Yeh was able to scam over a hundred thousand dollars total.

The police found, that Yeh is staying with his childhood sweetheart, Yu’s house, they’re both from Mazu, and are very close to each other; but Yeh had also used the excused that he needed some cash to make his business work, to persuade Yu to transfer the deeds to two of her government issued housing to Yeh’s wife to get a loan from the banks.  Yu didn’t get a single cent in return, and, her house became someone else’s.

The police got her call, and traced the leads, and found out where Yeh was hiding, and, when they took him, he’d claimed, that there’s only the business transaction of lending the money, that there was NO intentions of fraud; he’d claimed that he really IS the CEO of the Gemini Development Agencies, it’s just that he had yet to set up his company, that it was still in the planning stages.

And, see how those ladies fall so easily for that OLDEST trick in the book?  It’s all because they’re too desperate for love, too desperate to find someone that they can spend the rest of their lives with, and it’s EXACTLY this need for love that’s made them much MORE gullible, and easily tricked.

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Filed under Abusing Someone's Trust, Cost of Living, Crime & Punishment, Criminals, Empty Nest, Interactions Shared with the World, Issues of the Society, Moods, Emotions, & Feelings, News Stories, On Being Single, Pursuits of Pointless Things, Scams, Social Awareness, Stupidity, Values, Vicious Cycle, Wake Up Calls

Your Children’s Marriages are NOT Up to You to Decide

BUTT OUT, parents, and LET your kids live THEIR lives, if you KNOW what’s best for them, but apparently, you still got NO clue here, translated…

After my eldest daughter passed her thirtieth birthday, I’d become somewhat nervous, I’d often grilled her about whether or not she’s seeing someone constantly.

Once, she’d accidentally disclosed, that so long as she’d nodded, then, Wang will marry her.  Wang is a man who has a TON of good qualities, and so, I’d often nagged her, telling her to make the decision right away.  She’d gotten a little BIT annoyed, and would joke with me, “It’s MY choice, who I marry, if you like him so much, then, why don’t YOU marry him?”, and, her words, had shocked me, made me not knowing, how to reply.

Afterwards, my eldest “sold out” to a foreign land, even though I’m totally against an “international affair”, but all I could do, was to accept.  My good friend, Mei, consoled me, that the world is now, connected as one, that international marriages are quite common, that there are daughters and sons-in-law of Ukrainian, Indian, Japanese, Malaysian, British, American, origins.  Even though, at first, the parents all had something to say, but, in the end, their “votes” didn’t matter, that the children had already made up their minds, so, it’s best, for us, the elders, to “know when to stop nagging”.

Let me show you with another few more examples then!  My friend, Lee’s social status is very high, his son is a doctor, in order to marry a nurse, who’s not in the same status quo with him, he’d rebelled against his parents’ wishes to the point, that they’d had a revolution in the family, and, the parent-child relationship froze, in the end, the parents finally gave in.  Thankfully, the daughter-in-law overlooked this small “glitch”, and now, the three generations got along very well together.

My friend, Hsiao-Lang’s only son is also a doctor, and, Hsiao-Lang thought that the girl he is to marry wasn’t good enough for him, and spoke against it.  The son kneeled down to beg the parents to allow it, and said, that if they didn’t agree to him taking her as his wife, then, he will spend the rest of his life alone.  After many years of deadlock, the son still didn’t change his mind on who he loved, and, Xiao-Lang can only raise up that white flag, because she feared, that she’d never get to have a grandchild to hold.

My friend, Wan-Jun’s son fell in love with an older woman, and, there’s a huge gap in their age, even though, the Taiwanese proverb as a say of “Marrying an older woman is luck”, but, Wan-Jun held firm to against her son’s marriage.  The son was insistent on marrying her, it’d angered her so much, that the parents didn’t even attend their wedding, and now, their grandson is already two years old, and the daughter-in-law rarely comes to visit the mother-in-law, and it’d been very difficult, for her, to see her own grandchild; and whenever Wan-Jun went to her son’s place, her daughter-in-law would have a sour face, and she’d regretted her choice from the very beginning now.

As parents, we’d often used the rules of three “highs” to select a mate for our own daughters, without realizing, that hey, the younger generations no longer took the three “highs” to be important in their considerations of “mate selections”, and believed, “so long as I’m in love, then, why not?”  And, what’s happened even MORE often, is that the selected mates for the sons and daughters by the parents, within a few short years of marriage, they’d split, so, just leave it up to the kids, to decide, who they marry, to themselves!

And so, because of so many bad examples of how standing against your children’s marriage had turned out (take from the above examples, why don’t ya!!!), you, stupid (b/c that, is what ALL of you are!!!) parents should start to BUTT out, of your kids’ relationships, and, do NOT think, that we, the children, will allow you, our kind-hearted, gentle, loving, blah-blah, blah (that was ALL S-A-R-C-A-S-M-S!!!) parents, to fucking interfere with OUR lives, because we are ALL independent, at least, in the realms of choosing W-H-O we will marry, after all, it is, OUR lives, so BUTT out!!!

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