Category Archives: Facebook

Advising Us All, to Not Get Addicted to Facebook

The first of the Relativity of Literature for the month of June, translated…

Jia-Hsien Yang: I will never forget the day I got hooked on Facebook.  It was a period of my life when I felt most lost—yes, that, was during the time when I’d buckled down, and wrote out my doctoral dissertations, in the research center’s research rooms, the days grew dark.  During that entire year, I did not write a single poem at all, I’d checked out my progress on Word, to see if I’d written another extra five hundred characters and added three more notes.  At the same time, I’d started, writing on Facebook, back then, Facebook was not yet “populated”, I’d only gotten a handful of kudos, felt a bit cold.

At first, it was only, a place, to smooth over the wound left by my doctoral dissertation.  As a few years had come to pass, it’d become this demon that prevented me from moving forward in my research.

But, before anything becomes an addiction, it would get tangled up, I’d written and you’d reposted, love and Facebook, are both like so.  And yet, it’d become this method, this stage, and people are all, coming up on stage to perform now, to show themselves, to set up one’s own image, and forcibly, report our own whereabouts to the world.  We can classify our “friends”, decide how far, to spread the news of ourselves to the world, or to give a dissection of oneself in depth.  There were my friends who’d insisted on not adding their professors, or their students, as “Friends”, some had kept the bosses, the managers, or subordinates away, as your mom and dad learned to use Facebook, and wanted you to add them as your friends, this, was the commonly shared trouble for us all.  Mmmmmm, that’s right, I’m the kind, that added some of my relatives, and at the very end, I’d blocked all of them out.  This, was the weirdest part of this sort of interpersonal relations: we’re allowing strangers on Facebook to read up on the goings on of our lives, but, we wanted to keep the cousins out.

As my workload increased, I’d had a TON of idiotic postings.  As I’d gotten kudos for my idiotic postings from the scholars, it’d shocked me so (for instance, recently, Professor Cheng came to give me a kudos).

Juan Tang: Facebook wasn’t born from the stars, and, the nights flowed, never endingly, and, perhaps, this, is the end, of my career in writing creatively.  I’d spend all of my days in the research labs, silently took in, all the losses I’d suffered, in the online chess games.  Constantly, fighting it out, with unknown players, never knowing, who will end up, slaughtering me to pieces.

But, I HATED Facebook, I hate how it is like a whirlpool, sucking my entire world in.  Ahhhhhhhhhhh, could this be, the biggest BANG of my life from here on out?  The nature of Facebook, is not for someone, middle aged chubby men like me, it’s a place, for those adolescents to bullshit in.  And here, we would use “Kudos” as way of attack, and, the beauty in quantity is measured, the qualities step aside, with the experts, using their fingers, every single person who’s not that good gets a kudos, Facebook is the holy ground for online democracy that’s for sure.  People of all ages, living in all parts of the worlds, can state their opinions, and, those who’d followed the leaders get commended, those who don’t, get shunned.  The pages are refreshed so quickly, the applauses died too quickly too, it is, a world, without too much “friction” (who gives a SHIT about “your weird goings on”, your “innocent ways”, and “simplemindedness”).

Then, why are you here, Old dude?  Oh, I’m here, to tell them, to get out, to tell them to stop sliding on their cell phones, to not rant on bullshits, to read those useless articles, to give out kudos for no apparent reasons………for the sake of having a successful conversation, I’d taken up their brain dead way of communication, to laugh out of turn, like chasing the pointless trends, to pretend, that I’m an outdated, but still in the game, old geezer, standing on the side of the young, of the open, of the future (but what if, I’m not?), to deal that FATAL blow, to the ancient belief systems.  Can’t believe, that they’d loved it when I got angered, posing their innocence, and giving old geezers who tried to mess things up like me kudos; can’t believe it, getting kudos feels even better than that $300N.T. whole body massage I just got at Hsin-An Massage Palace.  (oh, I’m in love, beep-beep, beep-beep), forget it, I’m about to forget to head home now, I like you all, younger boys and girls, it’s so funny, Uncle will chit chat with you all a while, do you think my words are funny………

Jia-Hsien Yang: Well, uh?  You seemed to become possessed when you talked of Facebook, it’d showed, how normal I actually am, how I’d followed the rules to the “t”.

Facebook, in the same level’s mirage, how it’d mocked the goings on of the party in front of the temples, it’s truly, a high pressured world.  There is always something going on, there would always be two different points of views, duking it out, we can’t keep our silences, we must show where we stand; if we don’t, we are deemed as aloof, uncaring, chicken.  And, all of a sudden, Facebook had replaced all the actions of man, like how everything you see on Facebook IS the whole world.  No wonder as people marched onto the streets for protests, they needed to post the photos online (I’d done that too), otherwise, who will know that you were there?  Who would know, that you are, showing care and concerns for the society right now?  I’d often pondered: if I didn’t think clearly, if I couldn’t speak wiser words than those already spoken, using a different angle, I’m just, “checking in” at the right time and the right place, other than making my Facebook account into my bulletin, my views into stickers, making myself, into a drop of water, in this big and vast ocean, what’s the meaning of it all?  Of course, this, is probably, too much of an individualist belief.  Perhaps, someone would say: what’s so bad, being a part of a group?  I’d recalled, the difference in The Gilded Age’s Ling Ding and Hong Hsiao now, I don’t want to be Ling Ding, and I lacked what it takes to be Hong Hsiao, but, their differences gave me a revelation.

Like I’d destroyed the atmosphere that Juan Tang was creating by sarcasm of the partying scene in the temple celebrations now……but, Juan Tang said, that there’s not that much friction in this world, no wonder, I’d feel very relaxed and happy when I’d logged on Facebook; the designers are truly wonderful, allowing us to block each other from seeing us if we felt like, and, allowing us, to stop interacting with those who had offended us somehow.  I’d started ranting now, as I’d opened up on my views of Facebook, but, at the same time, I’m reminded, of the two years, nine days’ ago posting of mine, and I’d reposted something I’d posted some seven months ago back on my front pages, to be used, as a reminder to myself, as well as others.

And still, at this moment, I’m feeling, kinda anxious about, not posting anything of value on Facebook for so long now.

And so, this, is two people’s opinion on the usage of Facebook, and, undeniably, Facebook had become, the way we connect with one another, as it’d connected strangers, but, do remember, the saying of how the more you friends you have on Facebook, the less friends you have for real, because you’re spending all that time online, “following” the goings on of those Face friends, instead of getting face-to-face interactions with those who are next to you.

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Filed under Being Exposed, Communications, Connections, Cost of Living, Early Exposures, Facebook, Interactions Shared with the World, Interpersonal Relations, Observations, The Observer Effect

We’ve Never Met

On modern-day interactions, translated…

Some people whom I’d never met, and, don’t know if they have the chances of meeting one another in life, but had become, this light scent of nostalgia to me.

For instance, T, one of my friends on Facebook, a man with a warm smile, and deep eyes, the articles he’d posted are very well-written, and he’d lightly disclosed, how three years ago, he was diagnosed with a rare illness, that it’d turned his views of life upside down, and, since, his writings showed this brand new understanding, this new kind of clarity about life.

One day, I’d recalled how it’s been a very long time, since I saw anything from him, and I’d gone of Facebook, to check out his page, then, I’d gotten to know, through someone else’s posting, that he was currently engaged in a tug-of-war with death in the I.C.U.  Since then, I’d gone on his Facebook page to check on him, hoped to get the message, that he’d made a full recovery.  And I’d often prayed to God, to look out for T, he once had such passions for life!

Another friend, C, one day, he’d also vanished, and, he canceled his Facebook account too.  What happened?  Why did he close his account?  In reality, C and I had NO shared friends, and so, I couldn’t find out how he was, even if I wanted to.  C is one of those lowkey people, who used a piece of photography as his display picture, and, the name he used was his initials, I have NO idea what was going on with him in real life.  And still, in the psychological sense, he’s such an interesting person, would use his humorous, and unique way, to reply to all of my postings, and it’d become nostalgic to me.  Having lost a Face friend such as he, I felt very awful.

And, don’t remember how long ago afterwards it was, I’d picked up a book I’d ordered online from a bookstore, as I’d told the cashier my name, after I’d gotten the book, was about to walk out, a man called out to me.  He looked very handsome, with this clean aura about him, but, I was certain, we’d never met.  He said, he was, once my friend, on Facebook.

Once?  I’d inquired.  He said, yes, he’d not logged on Facebook anymore, because someone made an anonymous complain about his account, his account was canceled, and so, he’d stopped using Facebook altogether.  “Actually, it’s a good thing, it’d given me more time, to do other things, it’s just that I regretted saying goodbye to some of the friends I’d shared deep conversations with is all.”  And so, as he’d heard me say my name to the cashier, he was so happy, that he could tell all of this to me to my face.

And, all of a sudden, I’d said his initials which had been erased completely from my mind previously.  And, his smiles became more radiant, “You still remembered me?”

I smiled too, “Of course!  I’m really glad, that I ran into you.”  Thanks to this chance meeting, it’d resolved ALL the questions I have about his disappearing on Facebook.

Back then, we’d started chatting, carried on like we were old friends, recalled some of the interactions we’d shared on Facebook.  Then, without leaving ANY ways of getting into contact with one another, we’d parted ways again.  I still don’t know his real name, or anything else about him, but that was unimportant.  Being able to meet back up with him, was more than enough for me.

Facebook had gotten those who originally had nothing in common together, like how a cloud, bumped into another cloud, or how a duckweed, swam into another duckweed.  In the world online, we’re close, and we’re far apart, maybe we would get forgotten by the world, and, we may become one another’s questioning thoughts.  Turns out, that in our not being aware of it, some of the interactions already had feelings infiltrated into them, and when we don’t see one another, we’d start to care and concern, and also, miss, each other.

This, is how friendships continued AFTER you’d logged off, and that still just shows, how even though you are making a ton of friends online, you should still WORK on the interpersonal relationships you have offline, because you don’t want to have a ZILLION friends on your social networking sites, but, ZERO friends in reality, do you?  I wouldn’t think so.

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Filed under Cause & Effect, Connections, Facebook, Friendships, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, Online Relationships, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Socialization, Translated Work, Trends

I Will Go to Bed Earlier Tonight

Translated…

Maybe you’d already begun searching

For my name

Many years ago, you’d followed my movements

To track down my life

Registering at places is merely

The proof of we’re losing something

And, what are you thinking of?

Everything in the world is zooming in

But, nobody’s giving you kudos

To my boredom at all

So, this, is what life is like, and, you are still, staying UP into the wee hours of the night, because you wanted to know, that someone out there, from the WWW IS actually caring about you enough, to hit that “Kudos” button of whatever it is you’re putting down on your Facebook accounts, and you will keep on waiting, waiting, waiting………

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Filed under Addiction to High-Tech Products& the WWW, Connections, Cost of Living, Facebook, Life, Socialization, Story-Telling, Vicious Cycle

A Birthday Party for a Group Ages Up to a Thousand Years Old

On the ins and outs of life here, translated…

We’d taken the advantage of the time that Mei-Yu who’d immigrated to Canada came back, we’d rounded everybody up, to head to Maokong on a weekday, to celebrate our sixtieth birthdays.

“Who celebrates their sixties?”, this, was a question, posed by not just those we are friends with her, but also, friends who had moved abroad too.

The leader of the group wrote a very long message, “the government had set up group weddings from time to time, we will also be hosting, a group birthday.  From being in the same classes as thirteen-year-olds, it’d already been forty-seven years since, and, most of the classmates are already sixty, whether or not you had met the ‘requirements’ or surpassed it, we’d hoped for all of us, with the combined age of at least a thousand, to head over to Maokong for a birthday celebration.”

And, immediately, a former classmate who’s retired wrote back, and, those who are still working tried to convince the group, that the gathering should be held on a weekend; and, those who’d become grandmothers had even asked, “Can I take along my two-year-old grandchild?”, and, the leader of our class said NO to all.  As for those classmates who are in the U.S. can only see how passionate those of us in Taiwan are discussing the matter.

That day, we’d found a group of ten members, although, we couldn’t add up to over a thousand years in age, but, this, was as perfect as it got.

We’d gone to the chicken shops to get fed, all the items were amazing in taste to us.  The Maokong Gondola looks out toward the 101 that shot straight into the clouds, Mei-Yu used her cell and took shots unstop, the beautiful scenes matched well with the savory foods.  And still, when the waiter brought in the specialty peaches for us, everybody exclaimed, turns out, this, was the set up, by the leader of our group, and everybody who was there appreciated her careful thought, and named her honorary leader.  We’d lifted our glasses, and wished everybody happy birthday, and gave hooray to our friendships, and made a date, to come up every year.

After the meal, the leader of the entertainments led us, walked from the hiking trails to the back mountains of the Politics University.  The trails was very easy, but, we can see, how those who failed to keep up with regular exercises had paled by comparisons to the rest.

At the moment, the group leader decided, that she will be gathering us all, for the activities regularly, and, Ding immediately said no, and, the rest of us also.  As we walked, we recalled the past, how fast the time flew, what we’d shared in the past had already become blurred out, and, everybody recalled differently, and so, we’d decided, that at least three members of the party must agree on an issue, for it to be valid, and, those of us who’d gotten into our first choice of schools are no longer bragging about our amazing memories.

We’d gone on this fun trip, holding hands, and, our friendships were just as it was from the day we met.  Everybody was celebrating our combined sixtieth birthday.

So, this, is how you can connect with your long-term lost-contact with friends, by hosting gatherings regularly, and, keeping up with everybody is truly very hard, but, this group still made the time, because they cherished one another’s friendships very much.

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Filed under Facebook, Friendships, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, The Teenage Years, Translated Work

A Holiday for Old Friends, Holidays that Don’t Exist

Translated…

In order to follow up with the speed and swiftness of the Internet, we’d given ALL the time we possibly can, to meet brand new friends, but, we’d stopped, connecting with the friends we already have…

The Definition of an Old Friend since the internet entered into the social networking age, everybody became very good at making friends, and, the number of friends can go up as high as hundreds at a time, easily, hit the thousand “marker” too, and, we’d had to set up fans groups, and, we’d often sigh about how a photoshopped picture of us, can get ourselves, millions of Kudos at a time, everybody IS a superstar.

Even those old friends we hadn’t seen in a long while, old flames, former debtors, even those long-lost family members, are reunited via Facebook, and we can pick up our arguments, right where they left off too.

Interacting with others had become too convenient, and, the connection between people extended, to beyond our imaginations (try thinking about, those 5,000 virtual friends!  In reality, I’d be lucky, if I can recall the names of just five hundred).  And still, a lot of “friends” who gave one another Kudos online, they’d never even met face-to-face, and, the defining of friendships had become, even MORE complicated compared to the past times.

Unless, this world had become destroyed, otherwise, the Internet technologies are surely to move forward more and more, and now, if you want people to write letters as exchange, or hand one another one’s own business cards, it’s, impossible.

But, those real friends, how can the interactions be limited to “on screen”?  We must make physical contacts with one another, mustn’t we?

That was from kindergarten, when your teachers told you, to hold hands, the two of you, and never to let go of one another, seeing him crying, you’d cried too, you know, how the two of you had stressed your teachers out?

Must’ve met back in elementary school, you two loved the same kind of comics, and, you can share a popsicle with each other, and, help one another stand in life at the school snack shop, or, the friend you’d gone to the restrooms with.

And, they must be that group of pals that met up for a game of hoops, to meet up at someone’s house to study hard, to cover one another on exams when you cheated, the ones whom you’d gone out shopping with on the weekends, the buddies you’d hung out with at McDonald’s when all of you got bored out of your bones.

A Holiday Saved, Especially for Old Friends

Naturally, old friends can be rookies who entered into the workforce together too, had both been humiliated by the bosses or clients, and understood how it felt, when the proposals you’d made got tossed back, and the ones you’d gone out drinking on the day you received your wages, knew the secrets of each other’s partners, those kinds of friends.

Old friends, would also be those best men, maids of honor, and those to whom you asked for help when times got too tough and not feel ashamed or embarrassed by it, the one whom you’d called up, after you’d had a huge fight with your spouse after you married.  Of course, when the situations got worse, the old friends are those who knew, that you just needed their accompaniments and not their advices.

Old friends, would totally be the ones who would be willing to do more for you, the aged and best of friends.  Like this sort of friends, you must have a couple of years of interactions with one another, and, decades, even.

But, with the convenience of the internet, it’d tightened the flexibilities of our lives, in order to keep up, we’d given up ALL the time we possibly could, to meet up with more and more newer friends, but, we’d stopped, connecting with the older friends we had already.  And sometimes, even if we’d made a date, the couple of old friends just couldn’t find a way, to match the time.

And time, it had, gone accordingly, the years flew right by us, without any hesitations.

One year, an old friend had gone abroad.  One year, an old friend got married.  One year, s/he fell ill.  And, another year, s/he had passed away.  We may still get to know the news via Facebook, but, Facebook couldn’t possibly share our losses, or even, our sorrows, those emotions, can only be understood, by our old friends.

There are so many holidays in the world, but, for as far as I know, there’s NO holidays saved for friends, and so, I’d had this thought, a holiday, especially, for friends: Holiday for Old Friends.

So, with the internet connection speed getting faster, faster and faster by the day, the connections we’d made in the past, like from our childhood years, remember those good friends that used to cry and laugh with us?  They’re all gone, because we’re too busy, keeping up, with those so-called “friends” from our social networking sites, and, think about it: how many of those friends you’d shared a common interest from online can you actually share your thoughts and feelings with, not very many would be my guess, then again, what the HELL would I know, right???

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Filed under Connections, Cost of Living, Facebook, Friendships, Interpersonal Relations, Perspectives

Sunbathe

Translated…

We placed our trusts in one another’s Facebook, that, is a bright and happy fruit farm, and maybe, there may be shades, but, it’s still, welcoming to all the guests.

Sunbathing together, on the screens, hearing together—the distant keyboard’s grazing the plains.

And tonight, as the rain drops hit my windows, the estranged moose stepped on the lovely imprints, wondering why, at this moment in time, we were only taking a break, but it feels more like an eternity.

This is still very awful, when you need to keep tabs on someone 24/7, and yet, some people out there mistake this sort of bad behavior as L-O-V-E, it’s MORE like codependence, IF you ask me, but hey, who asked Y-O-U, right???  Exactly!!!

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Filed under Connections, Expectations, Facebook, Observations, Romance

Over Twenty-Percent of the Children of the Higher Grade Levels in the Elementary Years Were Cyber-Bullied

And NO, you still didn’t hear it from ME!!! From the Education Section of the newspapers, translated…

With the coming on of the cyber age, the bullying of the elementary years had gone online. The newest published research stated, that in the higher grades of the schools in the city, there are already over seventy-percent of children who are using Facebook, and, over twenty-percent of these users had once been bullied on Facebook, for instance, gotten hurt by the rumors, getting ignored and blocked by someone they knew; students with good grades would also ask the crowd on Facebook to bully someone else, and, those who gave kudos, who support this sort of bad behaviors, are even more numerous.

The instructor from Bo-Ai Elementary School, Chen had once handled a case where a student was bullied on Facebook, while he was studying at the criminology graduate studies school in Taipei University, he’d written his thesis on the topic of “the Bullying Relationship of Elementary School Students on Facebook”, he’d sampled over nine-hundred upper class students in the elementary years in the city of Taipei, and asked them about their experiences of being cyber-bullied, recently, he’d held a conference on the subjects in the forum, hosted by the Department of Education.

He’d found, that in the recent three, to four years, the bullying in the schoolyards had gone “hi-tech” and became cyber bullying now, because normally, the instructors would be in the classrooms, and, it would be easy for a student, to attack another; but, when the kids got home, a lot of the parents are allowing their kids to go online without restrictions, especially, with how user-friendly Facebook is, and how fast things spread on there, and there were functions to block, to become cliques, it’d exacerbated the conditions of group bullying.

Chen’s research found, that 73.3% of the kids in the higher grades of the elementary school years use Facebook, and out of those 22.7% were bullied on Facebook, the most widely used scenario: the classmates talked trash about you, or ignoring you on purpose, or, having other people isolate you.

The investigations showed, that over fifteen percent of elementary school student in the higher grades had once bullied someone else on Facebook; and, there were more than forty percent of the students, who just watched, as someone in their classes got bullied.

The research also discovered, that students who are highly nervous, more sensitive, easily angered, or anxious, are less popular in the groups, and are more easily to become the victims of Facebook bullying, because the victims would often block the abusers, to protect themselves.

As for the abusers who were once abused on Facebook, the boys outnumbered the girls. Chen said, what’s worth more of our attention is, the abused turned abusers in the schools are mostly those children with bad grades, and the troublemakers in school, however, those who used Facebook to bully others, are not necessarily not doing well in school.

Chen had once discovered, that there were those students who were making high grades, who seemed well-behaving enough, who are loved by their instructors, because she’s the leader of the class, she’d gotten together, with her clique, and bullied those she didn’t liked, and that would make the victims’ lives even harder.

So see, this, is another BAD thing about using FB, I mean, sure, FB IS the INNEST way to “connect” right now, I mean, who wouldn’t want to know what everyone’s doing, every minute of every day, right? But, this is still a HUGE problem, because kids are still bullying each other, because they can, because nobody’s setting them straight, and, even IF the teacher told the kids to stop bullying one another, you think that those children would listen to their school instructors?  HECK NO!

The More One Relies on Facebook, the More Likely One Can Become Victims or the Bullies

Chen, the elementary school instructor pointed on, in order to prevent the bullying on Facebook, the parents should make the rules of online time with the kids, rather than restricting them from using, and start caring about the kids’ friendships; when you find that you’re kids were blocked, or singled out, you may ask the school teachers to step in to help out.

Chen said, the elementary students now, are using Facebook regularly, and there more likely they’re to fall victim to this cyberbullying. The parents would make up the rules of how the kids must finish their school work, before they can log onto Facebook, and, when their coursework became affected by their Facebook usage, then, they will be banned from using.

Chen suggested the parents to give the kids enough privacy, when they’re using Facebook on a regular basis; but, you need to communicate with your children, and know their account names, passwords, so you can get a hang of your kids’ friendships, that way, you can help when something seems off.

As for the school teachers, Chen suggested, that they need to educate the students, that once they were bullied on Facebook, they must come forth and seek out help; especially, the instructors should encourage the bystanders, to NOT keep silent, to tell the teachers immediately, so the instructors can help mediate the tension that’s happening in the interpersonal relationships on Facebook.

And, if the instructors are observant enough, they can discover the bullied easily. Chen told the example, that two years ago, the sixth grade class he taught, there was a young girl who didn’t play with the other kids, but would come to him to talk, and, after he’d inquired, he’d learned, that she was singled out by her Face friends, everybody called her a “tattle-tell”, a fake.

And so, Chen called up the leader girl who started the bullying, to communicate, and through the fieldtrips along with other group activities, to close the distance of the victim and the perp, and he was able to effectively resolve the situations. The student who were bullied are mostly less confident, and the teachers can encourage these children, to take up leadership roles in the Face groups, to prevent showing off, and posting untruthful statements on FB, that can also help the interpersonal relationships to get better.

And so, this is still NOT YO MAMAS’ or YO DADDIES’ bullying NO more that’s for sure, and, with how popular FB is getting these days, that, would be how bullying happens, and this, is just as bad as cyberbullying, oh wait, it IS cyberbullying, and, there was this one girl who committed SUICIDE because she was bullied on Facebook from before, I know, I’d written about that when it got “presented” to me in the papers already!

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Filed under Being Alone, Being Exposed, Betrayals, Cyber-Bullying, Facebook, Issues of the Society, Life, Professional Opinions, Properties of Life, Re-Experiencing the Trauma, Vicious Cycle, Violence in Schools, Wake Up Calls