Category Archives: Getting Treatment

Seeing the Love without Boundaries from a Foreign Spouse

How the kindness cycled around, from the Front Page Sections, translated…

Last week, I’d gone to a free clinic session for the foreign worker fishermen, because most of the fishermen were from Indonesia, so there was a translator alongside me all the way; I’d had the spare time, and struck up a conversation with her.

“I’d seen you every single time in the free clinics, you’re always smiling, very kind and gentle, you’re, a rare gem!”, I’d commended her.  “Doctor, you thought too much of me, they’re my countrymen, floated across to Taiwan to work, I’m glad, that I can, be of some sort of minute assistance.”

I’d asked her where she came from, “I lived in Jakarta originally, my father is a catering chef, with an unstable income, and there are, too many mouths to feed, and so, in my high school years, I’d, married to Kaohsiung, hoping, to make some extra money, to wire it back home, to help with my family, but………”, she’d taken a very long inhale, continued, “not long after we were wed, my husband was diagnosed with oral cancer, after three surgeries, countless electrotherapy sessions, he could no longer work”.  What made her situation worse was, as her kids rode together on a scooter to visit their father at the hospital, they were hit by a car, her daughter was injured severely, in the I.C.U., her son with fractures, and needing surgery.

Back then, she was looking after her elderly in-laws on her own, her sick husband, and her injured children, she felt hopeless.  But thankfully, her parents in Indonesia wired some money for her, and her eldest sister who’d married to Malaysia flew over especially to help her out too for three months; more importantly, the national health insurance coverages, it’d, helped her out with the costs of the treatments; she’d worked as a translator at the agency during the daytime, at night, she’d gone to school, to hone up on her Chinese skills, her son part-timed through school, they were, just, getting by.

“Actually, the Taiwanese people are quite helpful, I’d met a ton of those who were willing to go out of their ways to assist me, by just being there for emotional support, or those who’d, offered to help me with my finances.  I’m grateful, and in order to pay them back, I’d, signed on these sorts of voluntary work, to make what I can do useful and helpful, and this time, I’d, brought along my children who’d healed from their injuries to volunteer also, to make sure they will note, the love that’s, without the borders in Taiwan.”

Her husband may not be well-educated, or made a lot of money, but she’d, loved Taiwan like it was her home country, as the trials came, she’d, taken them all in, no complaints, no regrets, she’d, utilized her spare time, to hone up on her skills, to acculturate herself into the local communities, and knew to give back, she is, the model citizen for all of the foreign spouses that’s for sure!

And, this, is how this woman was, driven by the cycle of kindness, she was shown kindness when she was in need, when her family had problems, she’d received help from all around her, and that was what drove her, to give back now.

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Because of Love, Being Alone, Connections, Cost of Living, Getting Treatment, Helping Behaviors, Kindness Shown, Lessons, News Stories, Observations, Overcoming Obstacles, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Social Issues, Socialization, Values

Marching Out of the Valleys of Depression, Don’t Give Up on the Treatments

Translated…

The incidence of the German Wings airplane, hitting into a mountain, causing 150 passengers to die, and, the black box that’s already been recovered shed some light to what actually happened, and the officials believed, that the crash was caused by the copilot, and confirmed that he had a history of depression, and had been hospitalized due to his suicidal attempts.

In recent years, because of the advances in medicine, the mental illness of depression became better known and understood, but, what is certain was, that depression CAN be treated, and the methods of treatment rnaged from biological, psychological and social ways, the writer of this article had been assisting patients long term, and offers a couple of suggestions, to make the treatments better accepted:

  1. Losing the Bad Reputation: the causes of psychological disorders are related to one’s physical wellbeing, getting treatment after being ill can greatly improve the chance of healing, from before, when the psychological disorders were thought to be untreatable, most of those who have it feel ashamed for having the troubles, and even stayed away from the doctors, this can only cause the illnesses to get worsened.

Actually, there are a wide variety of medication for depression to choose from, plus the variations of group of client-centered therapies, as well as family therapies, so long as the individuals are willing to face their conditions, not giving up on the treatments, there’s a huge chance that their lives are going to get normal.

2. Improving the Social Support Systems: the moods of the depressed individual can be improved with the help of medication, and, if the families and friends around the person are willing to listen, to accompany, it would help improve the motivation of the patients to get treated, and, the family can also help reduce the stressors in the living environment, thus, greatly reduces chances of relapses.

3. Be Patient as One is Undergoing Treatment: psychological illnesses are a long-term condition, even though, there are no apparent symptoms, the follow-ups are still needed, following a routine is a must, for instance, stay away from smoking, alcohol, illegal substances, not staying up all night long, pay special attention to one’s diets, sleep, exercises, etc., etc., etc., and, there are bound to be side effects to the medications, and you can learn, to adjust to accommodate yourselves to these side effects.

4. Establish a Sense of Pathology: most of those who were diagnosed, after treatment, will come to know one’s own condition better, and would worry that one might have moments of weakness where one does something one regrets, and so, the professionals encouraged to accompany those who were diagnosed with depression, other than going into therapy, the reminders of helping the patients feel better when the patients are beginning to spiral downward is also very important.This, is in the light of the airplane crash, where the pilot was depressed, but was still allowed to fly, and, it’s all in hindsight too, had this person gone through the needed measures for the treatment of his own depression, then, so many lives would’ve been spared, but they weren’t, and this, is still all, hindsight, working ITS magic!

The plane crash was very awful, but, we wouldn’t stay off of airplanes for the rest of our lives, because we knew, that this, was just an accident, that we can reduce the risks of it happening again, by applying the needed measures, like facing the psychological illnesses, the public can use a more proactive, more accepting attitude, through working in all areas, from prevention to treatment, to help those who are diagnosed, to have as normal a life as they possibly can.

This, is in the light of the airplane crash, where the pilot was depressed, but was still allowed to fly, and, it’s all in hindsight too, had this person gone through the needed measures for the treatment of his own depression, then, so many lives would’ve been spared, but they weren’t, and this, is still all, hindsight, working ITS magic!

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Filed under Cost of Living, Downward Spiral, Getting Treatment, Life, Lives Lost, Mental Health Issues, News Stories, Observations, Properties of Life, Socialization

A Brain Examination

Translated…

The woman had relationship troubles, is blue.  Took the advices of her friends, went to see the doctor, as she walked into the hospital, the waiting area was filled.  Before they’d gone into see the doctors, they all looked sad and depressed.  Afterwards, they’d all walked out of the doctor’s office with smiles and grins.  As the woman saw this, she couldn’t help but feel ecstatic.

Finally, it was her turn.  She habitually stuck out her wrist, to let the doctor listen.  But, the doctor got up, got behind her, opened up her skulls, and, started examining it closely.  Later on, she’d heard, this new way of “listening to the brains” had helped a TON of people.

And so, this just shows you how in modern day, a LOT of people need help emotionally, and, that, is why the shrinks are getting so much money, and that, is also why they’re charge their clients a TON of money, just to sit on their couches and talk.

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Filed under Awareness, Cost of Living, Getting Treatment, Life, Mental Health Issues, Observations, Perspectives, Professional Opinions, Translated Work

No Need to Fear Cancer

 

After the diagnosis, translated…

As my daughter went to her freshmen orientation in middle school, I found myself to have cancer.  Until the very day before my scheduled operation, I’d confirmed, that I was at the terminal stage of ovarian cancer, and I must stay in the hospital for more than ten days.  I was in a panic, NOT because of my illness, but, what would happen to my child?  She must face everything on her own: going to school, eating the meals, sleeping, laundry, everything that’s going on in life.  Maybe, it’s because how I’d directed ALL of my attention onto my child, I failed to notice my body, hurting, after the operation, or the pains from the chemotherapy, other than my daughter, I’d paid attention to NOTHING else.

After my chemotherapy ended, I’d rested for just a couple of months, and started working again, but, in just a few short months’ time, my cancer came back.  Since, every year, it’d revisited me again and again, and, I’d gone to chemo again and again too, and to date, it’s been five years.

I’d entered and exited the wards for five years, I’d gotten to know every single nurse, every single intern, some of the nurses even sighed on how I have more seniority than they do inside the hospital wards; and those who are ill and the families who come to stay with the patients are all very curious, how I was able to keep myself so positive.  And the manager of the nurses’ station had often wanted me to go and visit with other patients, so I can spread some of my positive thinking to them all too.

Last month, when I’d gone in for my chemotherapy, I’d tried to hold conversations with other people who are ill in the sun room, but, I’d found, that they carried different attitude than I had, to the point, that I couldn’t even get my points across to them, they were ALL talking about how they’re at the terminal stage, and aching all over, and some of the people there were extremely shocked at how I can remain so positive, even lived until now.

In the multiple years of chemotherapy I’d had, I deeply understood, that cancer is merely using ITS own way, to tell us, that there’s something that needed change in our lives in its own way; it told us that we MUST fix our mistakes from the past, maybe, it’s how we ate, or maybe, it’s how we lived, you can just change those habits one by one, slowly, day, by day, to NOT allow yourselves to get beaten.

And so, it must’ve been hard, getting rid of the cancer and watching it comes back to you again, again, and again, and, it must be getting annoying and painful, going through the bouts of chemotherapy that you’re enduring, but, you did NOT let any of that beat you, instead, you’d turned your experience with cancer into something positive, and you’re still making a very HUGE difference, trying to help others, and that, is making one’s life meaningful!

 

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Filed under Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Expectations, Getting Treatment, Lessons, Letting Go, Life, Maturation, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Translated Work, Values, Wake Up Calls

Thank You for Being There for Me, the Story of a Marriage

Translated…

Awhile ago, I was living under a great deal of stress, and I was diagnosed with severe depression, that sort of pain was unbearable.  And so, I’d had to quit my job, and focus on getting myself better again at home, and, our household had one less set of paycheck too.

During this time, I’d often lose it at any big or small thing at home, and would start screaming at my husband, but he didn’t get angry at all, instead, he’d taken it all in, and tried to re-direct my moods.

Every once in a while, my husband would accompany me back to the hospitals, to talk to the doctors about my condition.  One time, the doctor told me, “You have a good husband, who’d accompany you back here each and every time, he truly cared about getting you better.”

Afterwards, as I thought back, this sort of an accompaniment had turned into a habit of sorts, because ever since we married, no matter if it’s going to see the doctors, to dine, to travel, whenever my husband has the time, he’d be right there, by my side.  Even though, we are not doing that well economically right now, but, my husband would console me, “Don’t worry, I’m here, just focus on getting yourself well again.”

My condition had improved, and now, I’m on the reduction of medications, I believe that no long from now, I can finally be cured.  And because of my husband’s constant companionship, I’d slowly found my sunny side back again, and now, I’d face every day with a bright smile, and, when I’d held conversations with others from time to time, I’d told of I’d been diagnose with depression, and everybody would shook their heads in disbelief!

Actually, I know, deep down, that this, is all because of my husband, I wanted to tell him, “thank you for staying by my side, to give me the courage to fight; thank you for accompanying me, to let me face all the difficulties in my life with more ease.”

And so, this, is what in sickness & in health looks like, and the husband was extremely understanding toward this woman, and he’d worked with her, accompanied her to the doctors’ visits, and never left her side, and, this, is MORE important if the man makes a TON of money, to give to you, isn’t it???  Sure is!!!

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Filed under Family Matters, Getting Treatment, Life, Marriages, Observations, Obstacles in a Relationship

Opening Up that Locked Window Inside Your Heart, the Features of a Woman

Translated…

In my impressions, Mei-Yun is a person who’s very strict, never smiled, never talked, always carried this seriousness about her.  With her hair tied up in a bun, wearing a simple suit, with a pair of black flat shoes, that, was the “Professor’s wife” that I knew.

Two days ago, I’d gotten this hard-to-come-by call from Mei-Yun, she’d asked us, a group of friend to go over to her place for tea, to catch up.  As we arrived in her place, I, being sharp in the eyes, immediately noticed that the colors of the wallpapers, the freshly picked roses in the vase, to the few oil paintings on the walls, are not the same as the ones that were there from before.  She, who always kept herself the same, what had made her change so much? Mei-Yun said, that before marriage, she was an upbeat, outgoing young woman, not only did she love dancing, literature, she’d always hung out with her friends too.  Later on, she’d married her husband who is a doctor, and so, ever since, the title of “doctor’s wife” and “Mrs. Professor” tagged along, it’d made her wrap her original personality up.

Toward the outside world, she’d kept this strict impression of herself, and to her family, she’d followed the strict rules of being a good wife and a fitting mother.  But, these couple of years, she’d become more and more unhappy, fearing every single mistake, and also, cared too much about other people’s views of her.

She was diagnosed with mild depression, didn’t know how she can face up to her friends and relatives.  The meds, the visits to the therapists only worked for the time being, until one day, she’d met up with her classmate, Jade, then, everything started turning around.

Jade is naturally optimistic, encouraged her to TOSS away the restraints of how she feared the outside world would perceive her, to just let go, and do what makes her happy.  After Jade’s accompaniment and guidance, she’d picked up her painter’s brush, and got everything she was keeping locked up on the inside onto her canvas.  She slowly realized, that “red”, “yellow”, and “green”, these bright colors, are like her best friends, helping her out from the abyss of her own depression, pulling her into a brighter world.

Seeing how in Mei-Yun’s house, there hung her latest work of art: a little girl, stepping into the sun, with a bundle of colorful roses, violets and daisies, pushing open a window, and finding a deep blue ocean outside, looking very satisfied, that seemed to describe her state of mind right now.

So, keeping UP with this perfectionist façade is too hard, so much so, that it’d made this woman depressed, severely too, and so, she’d made a change to her own attitude, learned to relax, and learned that she should NOT carry and live UP to everybody else’s expectations of her, all she needed, was to live her life, and BE herself.

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Filed under Awareness, Cause & Effect, Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Expectations, Family Dynamics, Getting Treatment, Healing Process, Lessons, Life, Marriages, Maturation, Moods, Emotions, & Feelings, Observations, Peer Pressures & Influences, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Relationship, Socialization, Stories of Hope, Story-Telling, The Fate of a Woman, Translated Work, Turning One's Life Around, Values, Wake Up Calls

Codependence Came Knocking Again

Knock, knock, knock, I’d counted them, three, three knocks, on my front door, and, I already knew, before I’d even peeked out the window WHAT (instead of a “who”???) it was.

Codependence came knocking again, it’s like it’s trying to tip me over or something, and each and every time I’d worked hard, to IGNORE, it’d only hit me harder.

Codependence came knocking again, and, I really can’t deal with that constant, banging-on-my-door, louder-and-louder sound, and so yeah, I’d opened up, and allowed it back into my life again.  And once it (codependence) had found a comfortable place in my life, it’d squatted, and refused to leave, I’d threatened to SUE it, but it wasn’t afraid of my threats, NOR was it afraid of the “law”.

Codependence came knocking again once more, and this time, I’d made my mind up, barred UP my heart, so there was NO way that it (codependence) can POSSIBLY get to me, and I’d took me a very long and a much-needed nap (as my way of ignoring it, codependence???), and, after I woke from my afternoon nap, I don’t hear that knocking again.

So, I’d KICKED codependence, for now, and, who knows, maybe, tomorrow, it’ll come a-knocking again, and then, I’d have to take that same nap I’d done today, to ignore it, one day at a time, I’m getting myself, farther, and farther away, from codependence…

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Filed under Codependence, Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Getting Treatment, Healing Process, Life, Nature vs. Nurture, Observations, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Social Awareness, STUCK in a Cookie Jar, Turning One's Life Around, Values