How the adults’ attitudes are what helped this girl, dealt effectively, with the bullies that picked on her in school, the importance, of providing a safe environment that a child feels comfort enough, to tell the adults, translated…
In the meetings, my phone vibrated a couple of times, I saw, using my peripheral vision, that it was from my daughter’s school teacher, with an unsettled heart, I’d found me an excuse, rushed off to the restrooms, clicked open the screen, the photo of my daughter’s glasses being, damaged popped up, in the message, her teacher told, that the two boys from the next classroom thought that my daughter was, horseplaying with them, pinned her to the ground, and scratched her glasses. I was glad that my daughter wasn’t, physically, injured, but I’d, questioned the teacher’s description of the events, I’d thanked her notifying me first, as for how we’re to, handle the matter, I shall wait until I get off work, and go home to my daughter to discuss with her on it.
like this???
And yet, my daughter’s telling me of what had happened, thrilled me! She said she was playing in the track field, the two boys came up to her, without any warnings, they’d, pinned down her shoulders, and, as she tried to break away from them, they’d, pushed her face to the pavement together, and they’d not mentioned that they wanted to play with her from the start, they’re not even her friends, one only took the afterschool help classes with her, the other, a complete, stranger.
From what my daughter had, described, I saw NO signs of friendly interactions, nor was this, some, careless, mistake, this is, a conscious, banding together, picking one someone lesser sort of, bullying someone for the kicks of it. I was really angry and upset now, my emotions went up and down, she is only, in the first grade of the elementary years! Then? I’d asked my daughter if she were hurt, and did she cry? Was she angry, was she, afraid?
She’d shook her head steadily, she said, that although she couldn’t, beat those two boys, but she’d, remembered their appearances, and, as she returned back to class, she’d, checked to see if her glasses are all right. I patted her head, felt that she was, brave, and smart, and am, deeply, proud of her. I’m glad, that this incident didn’t cause any bad things to stay with her in life, but I’d, felt, deeply—maybe, I wouldn’t want to, believe, that children that young are with, malice, or maybe, I’m, affected by the eastern values of, the desires of, keeping the peace, how many incidents of bullying, actually, got misinterpreted as, horseplay? Because of a naughty temperament, because of lacking of awareness and not knowing better, because of some, misunderstanding, because of, not being, careful, enough…………we’d, given an assortments of getting off easy for the bullies, like how in Harry Potter, all the characters, dodged the topic, the name of, Voldemort, they’d, dodged the word, “bullies” and “bullying” too. Not realizing, that the unwillingness, to face up, to what’s happening, bullying, it’s harder, to resolve the incidents of, bullying.
illustration from UDN.com
As I’d discussed the matter with my daughter, she’d, decided, to forgive the two classmate who’d, picked on her, and I’d, supported her decision. I’d thanked her teacher, for making her feel safe and secure, for her, to go straight to her, as the incident was, occurring. And I’m too grateful for her teacher for believing in my daughter, for being, supportive of her, to protect her. But what I’d, hoped more is, from the school and the family angles, we can all, get the courage to, face up to the bullies, because, only when we’re, willing to face up to the events, then, we will be able to, sort through it, bit by bit, and let it go.
And so, this, is the importance of the attitudes of the adults, when cases of bullying is occurring in a child’s life, the daughter of the writer is being bullied by the boys, and, she’d, told her teacher, and her teacher had, been there, supporting the girl, giving her that safe place to go to, and the child was, intelligent enough, to note the boys’ names, and told the teacher afterwards.
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