A VERY important lesson, for the younger children out there, translated…
A few days ago, my child who’d only started to stumble climbed up the stairs, but, he’d just gotten through the first three steps, and was already calling me.
I looked over at him, keep turning his head backwards, guessing that he’s afraid of the heights, but didn’t know how he could get back down again, and so, I’d thought of going over, and carrying him up, but, the elders in my neighborhood started telling me that it wasn’t the right thing to do, “Children need to learn to stand up on their own, let him climb back down on his own.” “Allow him to know what fear is, so, he can have the experience to carry him through his life, to NOT do something that he couldn’t handle.”
Everybody seemed to know what s/he was talking about, but, I couldn’t bear, to stand hear him cry, I’d still walked over to my son, asked him gently, what, was the matter? Without knowing, that he saw how I was standing behind him, didn’t ask me to carry him, instead, it’s like he’d gained the courage, climbed toward the second floor on his own. As he’d reached the second floor, he’d gladly hugged me, and jumped up and down, as if the two of us had conquered the top one hundred tallest of mountains in Taiwan.
The results gave me a deep understanding, that a LOT of the seemingly right ways of education, may not actually, be fitting to the children, if I’d not showed my hands to my child when he’d needed me to, and allowed him to holler and scream out of fear, then, maybe, he would NEVER have the courage, to go anywhere NEAR that staircase again. Maybe, a lot of parents believe, that this, would make the child behave, but actually, this way of teaching would force the children to lose their sense of adventure, and the children’s trust in the parents would NO longer be there either!
And so, the mother took the words of the elders, to let go, and, being a first time mother, it would be hard, to watch a child who’d only begun to stumble, actually fall, but, it’s a part of letting go, something we all have to do, and this mother had successfully helped her son establish his own self-confidence, giving him the courage.