Category Archives: Old Age

The issues that comes with aging, examples of how people age, growing old, and coming to acceptance of losing control over one’s own life

A Family of, Four

A family of, unrelated by blood, “strangers” who help one another live their lives together, translated…

The woman, Chu who lives at the entrance of the street in her eighties, had been widowed for many a year, her children don’t live close by, she’d felt the troubles of living alone, and decided to find herself some, roommates, and she’d sent out the memo at the reading club, volunteer group, as well as the dance partners in the early mornings, hoping, to find some friends with whom she could connect with for the rest of, her, life.

After the little over three months’ search, communication, three other “sisters” moved in, they all had their own special talents, and were all, without their, significant, others.  The three paid a total of $15,000N.T. as the cost of utilities, and food, the four split up into partners, with each pair in charge of grocery shopping, cooking, every other week, with the extra amounts left, then, the money went into the slush fund for their, traveling plans.

like this, roommates who kept each other, company…

photo from online

And, just like that, these four elderly woman who aren’t related by blood, sharing same interests, lived their lives together fulfilled, the classes, the exhibitions, lectures, or workouts, and travels, they’d all gone to the functions, together, they’d gotten along extremely well for more than, three years since they’d moved in together.  Or maybe, they’d found their places of belonging in this, third life of theirs, they’d, lived in the understanding of what to expect from one another, with ease, each and every one of them looked, spirited, full of, energy, they all looked, younger, than their, physical, ages.

Every time someone inquired Chu how they got along so very well, more than the sisters?  She’d smiled and responded, that because everybody wanted to share a life together, so, they’d, let go of what they expected, with that mind of, tolerance, and helping each other grow older, that way, their can live well together, sharing the long life.

Her few words, reiterated the importance of learning to get along well with each other, something I’m, taking, from.

And so, these four, not-related by blood strangers, they’d eventually, become, families to, one another, and, they shared the commonality of losing their husbands, and they don’t calculate who spent how much on what, they do NOT nickel and dime what’s been put into their interactions, and what they got out of the interactions, they became, roommates, who are, actually, best of friends, companions, for life!

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Filed under Interpersonal Relations, Aging Gracefully, Perspectives, Old Age, Family Dynamics, Socialization

What We Need, in Order to, Age Gracefully

How this elderly man, INSISTED on staying independent, troubling his younger generations, as little as possible, and that, is how he chooses, to live out the rest of his old age!  Translated…

“I’d never seen an elderly, who’s so strong, and independent”, the caretaker said, in a heartfelt manner.  The elderly person she spoke of is ninety-three years old, originally physically healthy, but as he contracted MERS-CoV in June, he’d started, deteriorating; his wife died a long time ago, all of his children are in Taipei, but his son died a little over a decade ago.  Back then, his two grandchildren were still very young, his daughter-in-law, diagnosed with cancer, no time to grieve, he’d left the property in Taipei to his daughter-in-law and grandchildren, went home to Chiayi to live alone, and found work in a local temple, rode up north every month, to bring the $5,000N.T. he’d saved as he worked, and saved up on what he needed to give to his grandchildren, and he’d done that, for decades.

And yet, the elderly man’s daughter felt that he shouldn’t just give to his daughter-in-law and grandsons, thought he’d played, favorites, and only visited back home on the New Year’s and the holidays.  And, even as he didn’t have anybody to look after him, he’d not blamed anybody for it.  Several months back, he’d accidentally tripped and fallen, his daughter filed for the long-term care help, and the caretaker visited him twice a week to help with cleaning the home, and bathing him, but, as he was able, he’d, not wanted to impose, and, sometimes, when the caretaker came, she’d found that he was already, cleaned off, and took care of himself.

Not long ago, he’d contracted acute pneumonia, collected his own overnight pack, checked himself into the hospital, not told his daughter, or daughter-in-law, it wasn’t until the hospital notified the family, did his daughter learn, that he’d been, hospitalized.  And yet, because of work, and school, nobody went home to visit him, and he’d still, smiled on about it, he’d stayed for half a month that time, and was able to, go home.

Or maybe, in other people’s beliefs, this elderly man does NOT have a good old age, but he’d never felt any self-pity, and continued to live his days, as he is, supposed to, and, coped with whatever life, and fate throws at him.  In this aging world, with the populations of elderly living alone on the rise, illness, changes, loneliness, death…………can’t be, avoided.  I’d once read the article of the Taiwan Real Estate Company’s C.E.O. said: from settling into the elderly years, to aging happy, one needs three things: “The self, a means of make a living, and money saved”.  I think, the means to make a living including being independent, this is, the BEST state of mind, entering into our elderly years, that way we will, age healthy, happy, and, go on living, with dignity.

And so, you can see, how this elderly man, hated imposing, and that’s why, he’d done, everything by himself, and this can be hard on some, if they see that everybody her/his age is with the company of their younger generations, but this elderly man carried the attitude of staying independent, and it is his attitude, I think, that’s made him, so well-adapted to living on his own in his own, elderly, years.

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Interactions Shared with the World, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

My Elderly Roommate

An elderly woman who’d, moved in, into the opposite room of the writer’s, and, their, exchanges of day-to-day life, sharing that same space of living, translated…

Last week, there’s a new roommate who’d moved in opposite of my room.

It was an elderly woman in her eighties, as she’d gone from the homes of her three daughters, she’d finally decided, to move in with her favorite son up north.  My father matted up the floor, he’d told me, that the elderly would sleepwalk.

Before bedtime at night, I was called by my roommate to help her set her air-conditioning.

“Which button shall I press?”

The soft southern accent was like that tiger that’s climbed usually, from decades ago, to recently, continued to grow, with the gaps of the generations growing larger, larger, and larger.  I’d recalled how the elderly got the bruises on both her knees, and asked what she’d dreamed about.  She became embarrassed, told me, “I’d dreamed that I was in a fight with someone, I wanted to kick the person, but couldn’t, get to him.”  I’d wanted to laugh, but felt it was, improper, and asked her, did she have a dream last night.  “I’d dreamed about the president, taking my hand, telling me things, he was, very nice, and there were, many other people next to us.”

And I couldn’t, hold it back any longer, started, laughing.

Although my roommate is elderly, but she’s still, very, agile.  Can still ride her electric scooter to the marketplace to shop for her own groceries, used her wrinkled hands, to select the youngest, the most youthful bamboo shoots; she can also, take a few rounds of circling around locally, and, rushed home before sundown, just in time, for, supper; and she can, also, used her voice which time had, tracked across, to get her granddaughter to turn the channel to her favorite T.V. station, channel 29.

“This soap opera ran for so very long, Fei-Fei is, really, awful”.

Good on that, golden afternoon, as the years, slowly, passed by.

And so, this, is the leisurely life that this elderly woman was allowed, and, she must’ve done something really good as she was younger, to be, granted the blessings of her good health, her agility, for she’s still, able, to run around to the markets to buy the groceries she needed.

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Socialization

Forty-Percent of Contraction Rate in the Long-Term Care Facilities, the Nursing Homes No Longer DARED Taking in New Residents

In time of crises, this, is when the policies gets, tested, and, they all went, BUST, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

Burned on Both Ends of the Outbreak, & the Shortage of Employees, the Heaviness of Burden of Care Returned Back to the Families, & There’s the Case of the Elderly Woman Who’s Demented Getting Abandoned by Her Own Next-of-Kin

Up to last week, there’s been close to forty-percent of residents in the long-term care facilities who’d contracted MERS-CoV as the virus started taking over the residents of the nursing homes locally, with the death rate of 2.6-percent.  Although the government provided the free quick scan kits, hoping to get the contracted residents of nursing homes found in time, to get them treated, to administer the medications, but, a lot of the facilities are on edge, due to the last wave of pandemic, they’d already set up their own policies of “not taking the new residents”, which puts the burdens of caretaking back to the families.

The C.E.O. of Long-Term-Care Development Association, Yu stated that “the facilities can’t withstand any cases of contraction now”, that the facilities are still operating on the “clearing all the cases” mode, because of the last few waves of spread of contraction, when someone contracts, not only the health of the elderly get impacted, there would be the limited manpower too, although they’d set up the systems now, but, the nursing homes are conservative over taking in the new residents, and they would normally wait until the last contracted elderly gets out of quarantine, then, considering taking in more new residents.

Yu told, that the rules now, is that the residents on the day of admitting in, if they have a negative scan result, then they will be admitted, and yet, a lot of the facilities raised up the restrictions, demanded that the prospect residents have a two-days negative PCR test.  This restriction had upset the families, before the elders get placed into the homes, there were the problems surfacing.

And, the loss of personnel to look after the elderly population also caused the lacking in motivations for the nursing homes to take on new residents.  The C.E.O. of Taiwan Nursing Home Foundation, Chou stated, that in recent years, the employees are attracted by the benefits of the policies of Long-Term Care 2.0, and started becoming the homecare provider workers, causing the nursing homes to become reliant on the foreign nurses’ aides, and the outbreaks had caused the people to not come to Taiwan to work.  Lacking in the help, even if the nursing homes wanted to take on more residents, they don’t dare, and in the end, it’s still the families of the elderly who needed around the clock care who end up suffering the most.

Chen of the R.O.C. Home Caretaker Foundation stated, that the cases of residents are now, affected by the outbreaks, becoming ever the more unstable, a lot of the families are on their own to come up with the means that worked, and recently, there’d been a wave of “deserting the elderly”.

A younger woman needed to care for her demented elderly mother, and her two young physically handicapped children at the same time, but because she’d not qualified for the low-income assistance, she was stressed out by the pressures of economics, and it’d forced her to run away from her responsibilities of caring for her young and her own mother, and in the end, social services stepped in, placed the two children, and, put the elderly demented mother into the daycare programs.

Chen believe, that the outbreaks of MERS-CoV only made the problems in long-term care in the country more apparent, as there’s the lacking of foreign nurses’ aides, could the nursing homes make up for it, we need to speed up on the preparations.

Wu of the assistant department manager of long-term care of the Department of Social Welfare stated, that the workers’ number in the residential nursing homes, the caretakers are currently stable, but, encouraging that the long-term care can use the higher wages, working with the nursing programs of universities, to attract the workers.  And suggested that the families use the long-term care program for the at-home care, or the community-oriented care programs, and that they can use the resources from the care point of long-term care families as well.

And, to sum all of this up: the country’s long-term care policies are a bust, because, when the crises come, there’s NOT enough manpower, to offer the cares needed to these demented elderly populations in the local communities, and it all started at the very start, because the systems hadn’t gotten set up properly, and they’re still, testing the waters on this, that’s why, as MERS-CoV hits, all the problems, came out!

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Filed under Government, Policies, & Politics, Hindsight, Legislature, Life, News Stories, Observations, Old Age, Perspectives, Properties of Life, STUCK in a Cookie Jar, Theories & Applications, Values, Wake Up Calls, White Picket Fence

She’d Helped Her Grandson Buy His House, “Promise that We’ll Live Together Forever”, the Grandmother Sued the Grandson for Breaching of Contract, & Failed

Breach of contract, but there’s no record of proof, only the verbal agreements, and besides, the papers they both signed had been lost, very long ago, so there’s no solid proof that the promises was made for “taking care of the elderly woman for life”, that’s why the elderly woman lost her case, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The ninety-eight-year-old grandmother, Tseng was upset of how as her grandson moved into a brand new home, he’d not allowed her to live with him, accused that seventeen years ago, she’d put up $2.45 million N.T.’s to help him buy his home, and he’d signed the “forever guarantee” that stated that he will “forever live with his grandmother, whether or not he gets married, that he shall NEVER chase his own grandmother out of the house”, she’d sued him, and demanded him to give the amount back; the courts believed, that the grandmother couldn’t produce the proofs of witnesses that heard the promises, found her lost, as the elderly filed for an appeal, it got tossed back.

The parents of the grandson (age 45), were divorced when he was only three, he was raised by his grandparents, the elderly woman, Tseng stated, that in 2005, he’d wanted to buy the properly on Wenheng Road in Fengshan District, she’d terminated her cash deposits from the bank, gathered $2.45 million N.T.’s for him, he’d promised to live with her forever; she’d stated, that back then, her grandson signed a contract, with “I shall forever live with grandma”.  In May of 2008, because the grandson owed the debts and needed to sell the place, he bought a smaller suite.  The elderly told, she’d moved in whit him, and he’d changed the locks, and chased her out, she believed that he’d breached the term of contract, and filed the claims against him, demanded that he pay her back for the amount she’d given to him to buy his property from before.

But the grandson denied having received the money from the elderly, nor denied that he’d ever stated he will live with her forever.  He said, that after his grandfather passed, the three children of her grandmother’s didn’t want to care for her, and in order to pay her back for raising him up, that was why he’d allowed her to move in with him temporarily.  He’d claimed, because it was a long time, he forgot if he’d signed such a contract or not.  He’d worked and live in Taipei for long, and he’d once asked her if she wanted to move in with him, but she’d told him no; he’d stated, that even if he’d signed a contract, that was from May of 2005, that it’d passed the time frames.

The courts found, that the key point of the contract was “the grandmother and grandson are to live together forever”, there’s no clause on the breaching of the contract nor the specifics of the demands of returning of the amount of money.  The High Courts found, that the elderly grandmother couldn’t provide the evidence of the contractual, that she didn’t have a justified reason to demand that the grandson give the $2.45 million N.T.s back to her, tossed back her appeal.

And so, this is what happened, because the grandchild promised to “live with the grandmother forever” and signed the papers for it, that’s why the elderly woman sued him now for not caring for her but, there’s no paperwork that was kept, so, there’s no means of verifying the proof of contract, which is why this elderly woman had, lost her claims.  This just showed, how you need to keep backup copies of the paper work that you give to someone to sign, just in case, something like this were to happen, and, verbal agreements needed to be recorded down, and kept on record too.

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Filed under Cost of Living, Life, Messed Up Values, Observations, Old Age, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Wake Up Calls, White Picket Fence

The Variations of My New Nesting Alone

Here comes, the empty nest, how to occupy oneself, by finding hobbies, and, learning to adapt to life on your own in the elderly years maintaining that connection to your friends, your acquaintances, translated…

With the compounded milestone of retirement and my wife’s death, it’d caused me to lose the focal point of my suddenly.  I’d started immersing myself into a ton of activities for the retired persons, hiking, traveling, writing, book clubs, birdwatching, calligraphy, Buddhist teachings, Tai-Chi, etc., etc., etc., what everybody else’s “continuing education” for me is just “rushing to make the deadlines of my assignments,” and “killing my time”, nothing more.

Later, my youngest daughter got married first, moved out of our home, and started a brand new perfect family with my son-in-law.  As she was pregnant, I’d immediately signed up for the nanny classes, and worked hard in learning, and to get myself, certified.  As my young granddaughter was born, I’d gone to stay with the family to take care of her for a while, but they’d felt, that my certification was from the books, and I didn’t have any real experiences.  And so, they would take the advices of those parents online, and research the means to care for their young, and bring it up in discussions with me, to learn with me.

what he was left with after his children grew up…photo from online

As my granddaughter got a bit older, they considered how hard it was for me to care for their young, they’d placed their daughter at the daycare center, and only when they are too busy at work, and couldn’t get away, then, they would call me up to look after my granddaughter.

My eldest daughter lives with me, originally, we’d gotten into arguments when we had the dogs in the house, after she was married, her husband moved in, and it’d added to the complexity of interaction, and inconvenience of life.  Although we shared the same residence, we’d interacted like strangers, and the home I’d lived in my whole life, seemed too strange to me now.

Both homes, although, there are the bedrooms for me, but, I’d felt like an extra on the set.

Once as I’d visited a friend who’d moved into a retirement village, I was attracted to the services provided by the retirement living community, and thought about moving in.  And yet, in my conversations with him, I’d caught that hint of how it wasn’t as wonderful as I may have imagined, because there’s no people our age who’d cared for one another, and I’d decided, to put that idea on the backburner then.

And, there was a resident I had for rent which was about to expire, and, I’d started wondering if I should continue renting the place out or not?  I’d thought about it, my two daughters are married, with their own families and homes; and I’m an elderly person, with the free bus pass now, from before my retirement, I’d worked overseas and could care for myself, living alone is second nature to me.  And so, I’d decided, to let go of what’s tying me back, take that very first step toward my own independence at old age, took that rental space off the markets, moved out of my old nest, and started, living, alone.

As I’d moved in to my “new place”, the most important thing was I’d felt, that the twenty-four hours in the day belonged to solely me, I have all the time to use at my own preferences.  I now had enough time to read, to preview my school work, to research, to write down the lines that touched me which I read from the books………then, suddenly, these things I used to do to kill the time, no longer served that purpose anymore.

And because of how convenient it was, living on my own, my former classmates, my new ones, my old friends, my new acquaintances, to my home for gathering, teas, meals, chats, and we’d all interacted freely with one another, come and go as they pleased.  And this was the never-before sense of openness I now experience regularly.

Letting go of the self more, treat my self kind, I’m currently working on growing older, alone.

And so, this is a lesson that we all must learn to master eventually, because we will all age, and we will all face up with the means of children leaving the nest, and suddenly, we got too much time on our hands, and like what this man did, he’d worked hard, developing his own interests, and, found a way to keep up with his contacts, and continue to socialize with his external environment as he age.

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Filed under Empty Nest, Hobbies/Pasttimes, Interpersonal Relations, Issues of the Society, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Social Awareness, Socialization, Values

The Stranded Ark

How nothing stays the same, in the baptism of, time, translated…

The Stars that Lost the Precisions in Words

The Boxes, Flooded by an Overflow of Emotions

The Stars that We Can, No Longer, Hear

The Roses, that Became, Blurred

The Mix-and-Match of the Words

Waiting for the Sharpened Knives to Get Them Edited

the progressions of, life

found online

Cutting Off All the Excess

To Make Things Less, Complex

The Wind Can’t Recognize the Banners

The Cloud Can’t Decipher My Mind

That Ark Made of Words, Stranded

Expecting the Rise of Tides of Inspiration

The Musical Instruments Stopped Playing Now

And Took with Them, the Ripples Like the Poems by that Boat

There’s, that light scent of, loss here, of how things are gone so quickly, of how we can’t hold onto time, no matter how much we wanted time to slow down, it just, doesn’t.

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Filed under Life, Maturation, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Poetry, Properties of Life, Things Left Behind

Companionship at Old Age

GET a D-O-G, that’s my ADVICE!!!

Companionship at old age, someone who can, take care of me, as I age, someone with whom, I can, connect with intimate (not SEX!!!), someone with whom I can, share my innermost feelings with, someone who will, accept me for who I am…………

Companionship at old age?  Yeah, be your own companion, because if you can’t even, get alone with yourselves from before, and if you’d, failed to set up that tight-knit connection to your own loved ones, what the #$%@ (maxed!) makes you think, that your next-of-kin will, want to, stay close to you?  After all, it is, too important, that we surround ourselves with those whom we are, related to by blood (our offspring, next-of-kin, relatives, spouse, etc., etc., etc.), right?

how nobody wants to end up with…

living alone, in the, darkness…photo from online

Companionship at old age, very important, because, the lack of socialization, can make your brains deteriorate more quickly, than the original speed that your brains, deteriorate at.  Companionship at old age, not just anybody at random, but those that you cared for, raised when they were children, and, because you’d taken care of them, put clothes on their backs, foods into their stomachs, provided for their school tuitions, there’s, NO reason why they wouldn’t want to be near you, when you’re, old and gray, right???

WRONG! Despite how much you think you’d, given to your children, if you can’t make them feel the love you have for them, who’s to say, that they won’t turn out as ingrate like I became one, huh???

And yes, this is still, from the life and times, of a total INGRATE: ME!!!

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Filed under Abandonment of Children, Awareness, Being Alone, Connections, Family Matters, Interpersonal Relations, Karma, Loneliness/Solitude, Messed Up Values, Observations, Old Age, Perspectives, Socialization, Values, Wake Up Calls

Contributions to the World, Made by the Elderly Population

Making ourselves feel useful, even as we’d, stopped working in our jobs here, translated…

The Japanese man, Akasegawa mentioned the ideas of “elderly power”.  This is a sort of a reversal thinking, turning forgetfulness, nagging, repeating the behaviors of the elderly years, into the “powers of the elderly”.  “Elderly Ability”, on the inside flip it had, “normally people say that you’re old, that you’re, stupid, or that you can’t sit still, but the reality is: ahhhhhhh, the energies of an old man like me, had always been great, it’s been told like this, then, don’t’ know why, I’d, become, more active in aging, and I’d felt, that it is, a good, thing.”

There are the sightings of elderly energies all over Japan, when I’d traveled to Japan, there was an elderly worker who’d, left that deep impression with me.  It was during a February downpour, we’d arrived to Atami, to go see the camelias in bloom, the cold weather season, plus the downpour, it seemed, that the trip had, gone to, total, waste then.  The counter clerk at the hotel was an elderly woman, dressed in a kimono, she’d kneeled on the floor, squinted her eyes, smiled and told us, “In this cold a weather, I’m very grateful for all of you, our, honored guests to come here, today is, a good day, the plants in the courtyard had been quenched with the water, they’re all in a good mood, and, expecting to see all of you.”  Her words, helped lifted up the gloom of all of our, moods then, and, that trip, we went out in our umbrellas, and, looked at the beautiful camelias, the red ones, the white ones, each one is, quite, beautiful, there’s a species called “the crown”, with the red-bordered white petals around the red stamens of yellow, looked exactly like a crown, very noble-looking.  At supper, we’d met the lady who’d lightened up our moods earlier, she was eighty-three years old already, and told us, she was, glad to, still be, working, that helping the travelers feel happy, it made herself, happier.

There’s a shortage of caddies in the golf course in Chiba long-term, the elderly population who were retired during the time, had suffered cuts of their retirement funds, and are falling ill too.  The golf court started hiring the elderly folks to work as caddies, the eighteen holes of a game, split into nines, with the two elderly caddies servicing the golfers.  The elderly carrying the golf bags around, breathing in the fresh air, conversed with the customers, and making a paycheck too.  I’d gone to the particular golf course, and I became, deeply impressed of how the Japanese enterprises solved the shortages of staff members by hiring the elderly population to work, that it’s a resolve, for the welfare of the society at the same time.

There are, the elderly volunteer tour guides at the sights in Japan, they’d led the tours, told about the histories of the places, and their work ethics, made the visitors, truly loved, their hometowns.  As I’d gone to see the maple leaves, an eighty-year-old tour guide of the location, was showing signs of dementia, being forgetful.  As he’d finished up his tour with the group, he’d realized, that he’d, missed a tiny part, and insisted on leading the group to go on the tour, all over again, and it’d, added more wonderful memories of the trip for us.

There are those elderly populations here who are, giving in silent here in Taiwan.  The seventy-two-year-old Aunty Yang originally sold the fried crisp chicken pieces at the marketplaces, since her retirement, everything Wednesday, she’d prepared the items, and brought the foods to the tribal elementary schools to help with free meal plan for the children.  On the days that Mrs. Yang was in the school, the kitchen smelled aromatic, the teachers and students became more enthusiastic in teaching and learning.  Seeing how the students were enjoying her meals, Mrs. Yang was the happiest of them all.

contributions in the elderly years…

staying healthy through exercise…photo from onlne

The eighty-year-old professor Huang, had depression that he’d almost, committed suicide; and by chance, he’d found that a corner of the Da-An Forest Park in Taipei was filled up with the weeds and the fallen leaves all over that particular patch, and he’d brought along a broom, and the dustpan to clean up that lot, and became, best friends with the squirrels, and the wild birds in the park, and it’d given meaning to his life suddenly.

Being alone or feeling lonely means lacking that connection with other people, it would make us feel empty inside, that we aren’t needed, that we are, worthless.  Loneliness may increase the risks of many illnesses (including myocardial infarctions), there was the loneliness department set up in Great Britain, and the British government started sending the officials of the courts to work there.  A lot of elderly complained of loneliness, boredom, blamed their young for not staying with them.  Actually, the children had their own lives.  The elderly may be weak, may be forgetful, but, relying on the self is the best means, using one’s abilities as an elderly person to work, to volunteer, not only would you have the company that you needed, you can learn, and feel that sense of achievement.  Improving your own qualities of life, getting your health better, psychologically, and physically too.

and by giving back to the community…

like this…photo from online

And so, the key here is, continue to make your contributions to the world, like the cases the writer gave, the elderly in all of these cases all found their new purpose in life, because after we retired, the time became, free, and, with nothing to do, we can only, watch the days get torn off on that page-a-day, and the days will be slower than usual, because we can’t find a brand new purpose, because we got nothing else we are doing but staying at home.  The key here is to socialize, to get involved with the society all around us when we’re, elderly, to keep our minds, our bodies, healthy, even after the retirement.

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Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Aging Gracefully, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Retirement, Self-Images, Values

Her Final Farewell

How considerate this elderly woman had been, planning out everything that is to be done after she was gone, relieving her children and grandchildren, and other families of stress of her death, translated…

“We’d, walked toward death the moment we were born”, the philosopher told.

During my studies in the graduate department, Professor Wu of “Old Texts” shared with us the story of his mother-in-law’s “final farewell”.  As his mother-in-law was ill in her dying days, one day, she’d felt that her time was about almost up, she’d had my professor and his wife prepared the gifts, had them accompanied her to the few relatives to visit, to say her final farewell to them, to see them, one final time before she goes.

The elderly carried the gifts, told the friends and relatives: we’d been connected by our affinities of one another, that she’d been grateful for their kindness toward her, that if she’d upset them, hope they will forgive her for it, that this may well be the final time she will ever get to see them personally.  That was, the elderly’s bidding all whom she cared for a final farewell.  And, as those whom she’d visited cried and hugged her, my professor who was driving, helped his mother-in-law fulfill her wish of bidding everybody a final farewell.

As they returned home, the elderly took out half a million dollars, told my professor’s wife of how she’d wanted her final affairs to get sorted out, then, a few days later, she’d left the world, peacefully behind.

My professor told, this is the elder’s “saying thanks, expressing the love, making amends, and saying her goodbye”, a form of “final farewell”; his mother-in-law is a wise elder, she’d even, sorted out her own final rite of passage in her own life herself, lived a complete life, and, died with a smile on her face.  I hope, that as I get to the very end, I can have the same kind of courage, same sort of wisdom, to bid my loved ones, a good final farewell too.

And so, this, is the elderly woman’s considerations toward her own younger generations, she’d sorted everything out, so they only needed to follow what she told them to do after she was gone, and, by setting up the step-by-step, to-do list of what was to happen after one is gone, you’d be reducing the stresses, helping your own loved ones, cope with the losses of you, and, they will all be very grateful, toward you, for how you were kind enough, to plan everything out, so all they had to do was to execute, and grieve, without worrying about the funeral, and everything else that comes afterwards.

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Filed under Life, Old Age, On Death & Dying, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, the Finality of Life