Category Archives: Old Age

The issues that comes with aging, examples of how people age, growing old, and coming to acceptance of losing control over one’s own life

Elders Whom Everybody Likes Being Close to

How these two elderly women are role models for us all, not just in their abilities to stay health, but on the positive attitude they take, toward growing older, and living, their lives, to the fullest…translated…

With the advancements of medicine, becoming an elderly person, is the future for us all, but, it’s a lesson, to learn how, to be, a cute elderly person.

There were two role models, of what elderly persons should be like.  Grandma Wang, I’d met through the volunteer program at school, at age seventy-six, she’s, graceful, and, dressed in a way, that’s, visually, appeasing.  After her move from her old home in Chiayi to Taipei, she’d gone to the local elementary school, to inquire if there’s a need for volunteer, and she’d started working, as a “story grandma”.

Some of the stories that Grandma Wang told the students are from the illustrated books, children’s books, and, some stories, were from her own travels, that she’d, changed the parts to.  With the lessons, Grandma Wang would bring her own homemade props, for instance, on the story of the Pygmalion, she’d started, playing the role of the female lead, handed the flowers one by one to the children, with the rise and falls of her voice, it’d, captured the children’s, attention.  Every time she’d walked down the streets, the children would greet her eagerly, “Grandma Wang!”

She also volunteers as the morning homework helper, four days a week, she’d, tutored two children who needed the extra help time.  Other than volunteering, she’s also, actively involved in the community choir too, doing yoga at the gym, to train her muscles, she’d managed to keep her body fit.

staying active in the elderly years…

查看來源圖片
photo from online

Another Grandma Lee, was an elder I’d met when I volunteered to the home visits, Grandma Lee was with a straight back, and you can’t see that she’s, already, ninety.  Her son lives out of country, her daughter lives in Kaohsiung, and often comes up north to visit her.  Grandma Lee had been volunteering at the hospital for thirty years on end, and recently, she’d, stepped down.  She’d gone to the parks early in the morn every day for tai-chi, and had brunches with her fellow martial artists, and, once a week, she’d gone to volunteer at the local borough’s office, and would arrange her time once a year, to go to the hospitals or the nursing homes with the Tai-Chi instructor to teach everybody some simple moves the residents can do to keep up with their physical wellbeing.

And, these two beautiful elderly women had a couple of things in common: first, they’re very physically healthy, with the regular routines for their workouts.  Secondly, both are involved in volunteer work, the embodiments of happy in helping others.  Thirdly, they’re, actively, interactive with their external social environments, not fallen off the connections with society.  I want to take after them, to become, a warm, an elder whom everybody wants to be close to.

And so, these two elderly women are, amazing role models indeed, they are very active, they kept up with their health, exercised regularly, and, found the time, to give back to the community, which is what probably helped them stay youthful, and they’re, role models for all of us indeed!

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Expectations, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Socialization

A Man a Letter to the President, the Caretaking Groups Begged for the Reliefs, the Lift on the Bans of Gathering to the Government

The families here, with the long-term care needs, with the pressures of caretaking growing greater by the day, they’re all, about, to CRASH, and, this, is their asking of the president here!!!  Off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

A Total of 24,000 Families in Taiwan with Long-Term Care Needs about to CRASH, Chen: We’ll be Discussing Loosening the Procedures of the Matter on Wednesday

Starting in July 13th, the country is loosening the restrictions on lockdown, the command center announced that the facilities can reopen, with the restrictions, but the daycare centers, the Alzheimer’s centers isn’t a part of those, a ton of caretakers screamed out: “We can’t take it anymore!”, the four major caretaking groups started up the “one man one letter to the president” act, hoping, that the ban of the daycare locations can be lifted sooner.  Yesterday, the commanding center stated, that they’re, discussing the loosening of the rules with the experts on Wednesday (the fourteenth).

The Family Caretaker Foundation, the Taiwanese Alzheimer’s Association, the Elderly Welfare League, the Homecare Policy League of Taiwan started up the movement of one-man-one-letter to the president: the families are about to crash, from having the elderly locked in the home!  Open up the daycare locations” movement, stressed that the 547 long-term care 2.0 locations the 494 dementia chapters, had been locked down for close to two months since the outbreak, with the 24,000 families with the needs, about to, crash, and they’d called out to the government, to see it as a huge problem.

before the outbreaks…

查看來源圖片
photo from online

The secretary of the Homecare Organization, Chen stated, that the micro reopening, tailored to the other needs of the businesses, but had, forgotten the needs of the group that needed it the most, based off of experiences from other countries, cutting off the services provisions to the Alzheimer’s, the demented population, is a primary factor for domestic violence, and tragedies.

The foundation had been receiving calls for the past two months, every day, with the family members in despair, that’s why they’re, speaking up now, and decided to start up the movement of “a letter a person” to the president, and up to last night, the foundation had received a total of 268 messages, all hoping the government lift up the bans on the service locations soon.

Chen pointed out, that there are, 800,000 families in Taiwan in need of long-term care provisions, with five-percent of them from the lower end of the socioeconomic statuses, most others were of middle class, they believed the government, and utilized the Long-Term Care 2.0 care locations, in the daytime, they’d sent their elders to the locations, and go to work, and now, as the outbreaks occurred, this service was no longer provided, a lot of the individuals had to look after their elderly, and work at the same time, which is too difficult, the pressures from caretaking, plus the pressures of economics, it’s, too cruel for the families.

The secretary of Taiwan Alzheimer’s Foundation, Tang believe, that the elderly with dementia would deteriorate even more quickly, if the government does NOT reopen the service locations.  The locations provided more than 10,000 elders their needed activities, the government needs to encourage the elders to get vaccinated, to reopen the activities centers soon, to give the elders the motivations to get their vaccines.

查看來源圖片
the elderly, being, ever the more, isolated, because they couldn’t go out, interact with others…photo from online

Chen stated, that he’d considered that by the fifteenth, the elderly over sixty-five, who’d been vaccinated, already had the immunities, and so, on the fourteenth, he will be holding a expert discussion on the matter, to discuss how to reopen the activities centers.  He’d stressed, that the elderly are weaker in their immunity against the illnesses, but the caretakers needed to watch out for their own psychological wellbeing too, that the command center already planned, that as the vaccination rates reached a certain point, the daycare centers will be, reopened.

Yeah uh, that’s still, BULLSHIT, from the government, I mean, hello, if you’d provided us with enough vaccines, then, none of us would be locked in now, and now, finally, this group of caretakers of elderly population with Alzheimer’s couldn’t take it anymore, and they’d, told the government their needs, that’s when this head of defense against MERS-CoV came out, and stated some bullshitting FACT we already know, wow, isn’t that, something???

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Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Dementia/Deterioration of the Mind, Government, Policies, & Politics, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Right to Life, White Picket Fence

A Lovable Elderly Person

An elderly who refused to get beaten by old age, staying independent, and optimistic through life, an example for all of us, younger generations, translated…

Grandma Wang is 106 this year, she is my mother’s best fri4end, watched me from when I was a toddler, to becoming, a grandmother myself, after my mother passed, every once in a while, I’d, gone to visit her.  The neighbors who grew up with me from way back would also, go visit her as well, to comfort her, who didn’t have any children.

At first, I think we were visiting Grandma Wang because of transference.  Because our own mothers passed, and we don’t have any sense of belonging any more, and Grandma Wang was my mother’s, best friend, and being around her, it’d made me feel like I was with my mother again.

But, why would I, get motivated, comfortably, without any pressures, to go visit with her?  Or maybe, it was, the lack of the pressures, that sense of gratitude, catching on with the times, that’s, made her, very amicable.

She’d not, pressured us to go visit her more, and, not thought of, how long ago was it since we’d, last come, nor would she just, sit at home, and wait for us to visit; as we’d, visited, and when we are going off, she’d not let me feel guilty about not spending enough time with her.  And, no matter if we’d brought her clothing, daily necessities, or run the errands for her from time to time, she’d, taken our acts graciously, and, thanked us verbally repeatedly.

And, even though, in my minds, she wasn’t, lucky enough, because her husband died young, she didn’t have any children, and can only live off of the government’s low income sustenance, but she’d always told, of how blessed she was.

Or maybe she’d known, that she couldn’t rely on anyone, it’d, helped her become, the more, independent.

She has failing sight, couldn’t watch T.V. or read the books or the papers, and so, she’d, listened to the radio, no matter if it’s the topics on politics, finance, or social matters, she could carry on in conversation with us.  She can’t stand too long, couldn’t go out for strolls, and she’d, used the tables and chairs to steady herself, and, exercised inside her house, or did the exercises with her arms, and she’d, told us, to move around more if we want to live well.  Everything she could do on her own, she’d not requested anybody to help her, and she’d always, found things to do on her own too, that it helped her pass the time.  Sometimes, as I’d gone to visit, she was, chopping up the fillings of the dumplings.

It no wonder, that other than us, the man in charge of the local borough also loved paying her visits, as well as the personnel of the social welfare programs too, to carry on in conversations with her.  While my husband and I would often remind each other, that we need to follow her lead in our old age.  Becoming an independent, self-made, gracious, grateful, elderly whom others loved being around.

And so, what helped this elderly person to be loved by others around her in life is her temperament, how despite how she had the conditions that came with her elderly years, she’d still, worked hard, to live her life to the fullest, not relying on anyone, staying, as independent as she possibly can, and, it’s her means to living her life, that’s, drawn all the members of the younger generations to her.

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Life, Observations, Old Age, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Self-Images

The Hired Nurse’s Aide Displeased of Her Treatment by Her Employer, Fed the Person She Cared for in a Vegetative State Urine, Got Indicted

Taking it out on the individual whom she was supposed to care for, because this migrant worker felt displeased of the treatment from her employer, off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The female nurse’s aide from Indonesia felt displeased at how her boss didn’t give her three daily meals, she’d taken her anger out on the completely paralyzed, in a vegetative state elderly man, Chang, she’d urinated into the stainless steel cup and made Chang drink, causing Chang to choke, run a high fever, and in critical condition, and as she was caught, she’d excused her bad behavior as “some evil spirit entered into my body and made me do it!”; the D.A. believed that this was the social tragedy of the “lesser abusing the weak”, and recently, the nurse’s aide was indicted on attempted murder, and the D.A. is asking for five years in prison for her.

Based off of investigation, “Di” (age 37) the hired nurse’s aid started working as Chang’s caretaker last September, knew that Chang who’s bedridden needed around-the-clock care, that he relied on the feeding tubes, and had gotten corrected by Chang’s two daughters for not feeding the formulas in.

Di was displeased at the treatment of her employers, starting on October 1st of last year, for three days, she’d taken the stainless steel cup, bottle, and urinated into the containers, then, force fed it to the elderly man, causing Chang to vomit severely, to choke, with his face covered up in urine and fecal matters and vomit, and in the end, she’d, wiped the elderly man’s face off, pretended that it was, nothing.

Because of this, Chang ran a high fever, and was rushed to the hospital, and the medics found that he had the inhalation sort of pneumonia, and urinary tract infections, and his life was spared after the emergency resuscitation measures were done on hi, the family found something suspicious, reviewed the surveillance, and found what the female nurse was doing to the elderly man.

During the interrogation of the district attorneys, Di admitted to being trained as a nurse’s aide, that Chang’s daughter showed her how to draw the phlegm out, knew that the formulas should be injected in through the feeding tubes slowly too, and new from the forms in Indonesian, Chang’s conditions, and because the families didn’t allow her to have her three meals a day, that was why “she’d taken her anger out on the elderly man”.

The D.A. found her to have an unsure motive for murder, that she’d not shown any remorse after what she’d done, and it’d caused the families psychological pains too.

The district attorneys considered how the migrant workers are far from home, that they had to deal with the unequal treatment of their status quos, that the workload had caused the nurse’s aide emotional, physical fatigue, which caused her to develop the feelings of being mistreated by the individuals who’d hired her, which led her to make the wrong decisions, and this case is no doubt, a “lesser abusing lesser” tragedy of the society.

And so, this, is what’s happening, and yes, there are these cases, because there are those who’d hired these foreign nurse’s aide who viewed them as nothing MORE than hired help, because we’re PAYING your wages, therefore, we can, ABUSE you, MISTREAT you, and in turn, these hired help to watch over our elderly, our young, take their angers out on the ones they are looking after, and the problem still won’t be solved, because there’s always a party in that, higher up, status quo (the employers) and those on the bottom, the hired nurses, the migrant workers.  And to think that all of this could be prevented, had the family treated the hired help kindly…

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Filed under Abuse, Abuse of Power, Crime & Punishment, Improper Misconducts, Knowing the Law and Breaking It, Old Age, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Right to Life, Vicious Cycle

Karaoke Sing-Off of the Elderly

A common activity, a hobby of sorts, shared by this group of, elderly in the community, translated…

The afternoon sun felt, warmed, I took the white poodle that belonged to the elderly woman downstairs out for a walk at the park.  As I strolled, I’d heard the voices singing.  Taiwanese, Hakka, Japanese, Mandarin.

I’d followed the voices curiously, found that there was a blue pickup parked under the tree at the entrance of the park, with the karaoke machine on it.  And there were, many elderly accompanied by their nurses in wheelchairs there, extending their necks, longing to have a good karaoke session.  They’d started blurting aloud the titles of the songs, and the young owner of the truck made the selections for them, each song costs only, ten-dollars, with everybody taking turns.

like this…

查看來源圖片
photo from online

All the elders were smiling and grinning from ear to ear, with the mic to their lips, and one of them, half way through the song, stated, “oops, forgot the lyrics!”, and one sang for two lines, then, “the key is too high, I can’t get up there!”, an elderly gent ordered a classic Taiwanese tune, “Pillows of Two”, and after a few lines, he’d sighed, “the pillow fell to the floors!”

And, even though, there were, the multitudes of actions, everybody still laughed and got along joyously.  Thinking about how these elders were, immobile, they have only limited place to hang out, the karaoke set up on the truck allowed them to get their voices heard, to get what they feel out, and clearly, this was, worth, more than, any materials.  As for whether or not they were excellent as singers, it wouldn’t, matter.  After all, they are not, professional singers, at their age, willing to open up their mouths to sing, it’s, worth, a lot, isn’t it?

And so, this, is the hobby that’s, shared by this, group of, elderly, and it’s, a very important, socialization forum for them, because these elderly are in wheelchairs, or immobilized, and they’re mostly kept indoors, but, there’s this service provided for them, to hang out together, to sing along together, it’s something wonderful, that the older generations can share.

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Filed under Hobbies/Pasttimes, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

Forever Accompanying You

A developmentally delayed child that contributes to her family in her own way, translated…

My daughter in developmentally delayed, and a companion for the families, she’d accompanied the three generations.  The years changed, she will always be, a white sheet of paper, with the words of gratitude out of her lips, smiling.

Before the birth of my daughter, she’d been blessed upon by my grandmother.  My grandmother became a widow at twenty-eight, lonely her whole life, toward this baby great granddaughter, she’d felt that she was a grace from God, that she needed to love her very much.

After my daughter was born, we saw that she was limp in her limbs, with diminishing capacity, after a long road of treatment from the physicians, nothing worked.  During that age there’s no early intervention programs, and I had to work, can’t stay home to look after her, so I can only, move in with my own grandmother, and she’d, welcomed us with her arms wide open.

“Dear, come, a hug!”, grandma opened up her arms, my daughter ran toward her, like she was a pet that my grandmother kept, she’d slept with my grandmother too at night.  My daughter accompanied my grandmother for a whole of twelve years.

After grandmother passed, I’d placed her in an institution, on Monday I’d sent her into boarding, on Saturday, I’d taken her home.  This was a difficult period for her, as she came home happy on Saturdays, but when Monday came around, she’d started crying hard, throwing her tantrums, rolled on the ground, refused to get taken away, she was only fourteen then.

My mother moved in with me at her old age, I’d taken my daughter home so my mother could have company, during the daytime, my daughter went to daycare, and arrives home at four in the afternoon, and my mother looked after her with great care, they’d loved and cherished one another so, until my mother too had, passed away, my daughter had accompanied my mother for a whole of ten years.

After I retired, I’d taken her to a ton of group outings, to help socialize her into life of the community, my life, is her life too.  Companionship is the BEST gift of life, companionship doesn’t cost anything to hire someone from the outside, with the families there, keeping each other warm.  Although my daughter is not intelligent, but putting her in the right place, she’s still, a contributor.

And now, she’s, in her fifties, and as I got older, I’d found how wonderful she truly is, she’d had a ton of love from home, very spirited every day, it’s like the Holy Bible said, “everything works together, everyone benefitted.”

And so, this, is the “use” of this developmentally delayed child to the family, she’s great companionship for the elders, and now, her mother realized this finally, and now, the mother and daughter will live together, until the end.

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Filed under Children with Rare Conditions & Special Needs, Lessons, Life, Observations, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Socialization, Stories of Hope, Story-Telling, Translated Work

Finding Joys in Helping Others in Need

Helping someone in need!  Translated…

Early in the morn, I’d rushed off with my daughter to work, as we alighted the buss, we saw a bunch of ladies, looking over an elderly man, the elderly man’s socks were, soaked in blood, and, the tissue that covered the wound in the tibia, seemed to continue to bleed.

Thankfully, two more stations more, there’s the VMH in Shihpai, as he got off the bus, I saw him, sat waiting with hardship at the bus stop, the blood still, flowed out, he seemed to be calling someone for assistance; and I’d not cared that it was time for me to get to work then, I’d, gone up to him, told him I worked in the hospital, and had him call his families to meet him in the E.R., while I’d gone to the hospital, to get a wheelchair to get him in.  Then came, the running fast, pushing the wheelchair in supersonic speed, to the E.R., to when his loved one rushed in, the man was taken into the surgical ward to get sutured up, and that was when that huge rock finally got dropped inside my heart.  Later, I’d learned from his family, that the elder had cancer, and he was on anticoagulants regularly, had his hospitalization been delayed, the results would be, dire.

查看來源圖片the random act of kindness from a stranger here!  Photo from online

I’d recalled how as I rushed the elderly man into the E.R., he kept telling me thank you, said that he’d met someone amazing who’d, helped him out.  I’d told him, he was my parents’ age, that if something like this were to happen to them, I’d wanted someone to lend them a helping hand too, and, this hour-long interlude, although it was, thrilling, but, in the end, it all, ended, well, other than knowing the meaning of helping other is bliss, I’m, also proud for being, that tiny screw inside that giant white tower!

And so, because your empathy kicked in, seeing the elderly man injured because you’d wanted someone to help your own elderly parents, and because it’s in your line of work, to offer assistance to people, being a medical care worker, and you’d, ended up, helping this elderly man get to the hospital on time, and saved his life.

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Awareness, Getting Treatment, Interactions Shared with the World, Kindness Shown, Lessons, Life, Observations, Old Age, Properties of Life, Social Awareness, Values, Work Ethics

The Elderly Book Club, Life After Retirement

A group of mutual friends, reading together, sharing their adventures of travels with each other, connecting regularly, establishing that social support during the elderly years, translated…

Awhile ago, due to the outbreak, our “Book & Coffee Book Club” stopped for three whole months, and, every one of us, members started, getting bored, the host, Bi who was responsible for the month of May started the LINE book club meets, and assigned “Long as the River” by the writer, Yin-Tai Long.  And so, those of us who’d bought the book, bought them, those of us who’d, borrowed the volume from the libraries, borrowed them, I was, especially nervous, past eighty, of this book club meet, the gathering online was supposed to start at ten, I sat in front of my desk at 9:30 that day.

Recalling back in May of 2016, we’d, begun this book club on an article from the UDN News, we’d, read a book a month, and shared our thoughts on it, the group of us, ladies had, taken turns, hosting these gatherings, and, split up the costs, but the sponsors were all willing and able to, provide the snacks, the drinks, the fruits, and this is, our book club’s, fifth year.  And, the reason why we’d, operated well is that we don’t, limited ourselves, to reading books only, other than reading, we also, included, the movies to watch together too, and to go to places that we’d read up on, and share our own findings, our thoughts, and our feelings of these journeys.  And every time these meetings were held, everybody got all dressed up, and gotten passionate in our discussions, while in the luncheons or afternoon teas afterwards, we’d, shared with each other, the goings on of our lives, and, in the chit-chat, the bond we’d established became, stronger as ever.

like this???查看來源圖片a small, intimate gathering, of friends who’d shared a hobby: the love of reading…photo from online

And, in over four years, we’d, read over twenty books together, what I remembered the most were Yin-Tai Long’s “Listen”, the director, Zhang’s “Knowing the Artifacts”, the traveling writer, Hsieh’s “Walking Down This Path to My Dreams”, Yen’s “Finding My Self on This Map of the World”, and “Shoe Dog” by Phil Knight.  A world in a book, it’d, allowed my group and I, to see what the writers experienced, and the wisdoms they acquired from their lives’ experiences, ahhhhhhhhhh!  Reading is, such, a wonderful thing.

Movies are also, an amazing thing too, what I remembered the most was “Me Before You”, and “Hidden Figures”.  The former was a romance, but the subject matter was euthanasia, it’d made us all cry; the latter was biographical, on three African American women who’d, made their great contributions to NASA, and we were, all in awe of them.  Because al of us, girlfriends used the public resources, the public digital libraries, the photo exhibits, along with the exhibition of Picasso, we’d not added to our knowledge, we also, stayed, young at heart.  Duan-Duan who’s an owner of a preschool provided us with the space, she was, the pillar of this book club of ours.

The most amazing, were the two girlfriends of our group, sharing their travels with us.  Huei-Huei went on a self-help thirty day trip to Central America, including Iguazu Falls and Easter Island; while Bi went from Western to Eastern U.S. for fifty days she’d trekked through the Grand Canyon, Yellowstone National Park, Niagara Falls, and New York, and on her way, she’d, visited a pen pal from the States.  As she’d shown us the footages she’d captured of the trip, it felt like we’d, gone to those places ourselves too.

illustration from UDN.com圖/喜花如

Time rolled by, it’d been, four years since the start of this, book club of ours, and we’re still, all here.  And, I hope that we all have, amazing stories to tell, and I hope, that we will, age, slowly too, to do right by the creed of the silvery gray community.  As I got lost in thought, my cell phone sounded off, time to log on, and thus, begin, our, online, book club meet!

And so, this, is how you age gracefully, by finding a group of friends who share the same or at least, similar interest, like for this group, they’d started with the books, and, extended to the movies, and, shared their travel adventures with each other, enriching one another’s lives, adding more color to their lives after the retirement.

 

 

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Connections, Life, Old Age, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Social Awareness, Socialization

The Costlessness of Her Concerns

Showing that smallest amount of care and concern, to those around you, it just might, brighten their days, a whole lot, and you made yourselves, a new friend too!  Translated…

Remember when I’d first started working in the office, I felt tried, by the elderly woman who cleaned up the restrooms—she’d always, set foot into the slots the moment everybody stepped outside to check, if we weren’t, careful enough, then she’d, started, nagging at us.  And, because of how she took cleaning up the toilets so seriously, it’d made us, feel stressed when we go, we’d rather, go to an alternative floor for the restrooms, than to, bump into her.  And because, we’re all, very busy at work, that nobody ever stopped, to chat with the elderly woman who cleaned up the toilets, at first, when I’d started working, I’d wanted to, catch up to the fast-paced work environment, I’d, often, said the general greetings to her, then, rushed off too.

Later on, I’d discovered, that the elderly woman, other than keeping to her job, of, keeping the toilets clean, she’d sat down on that one chair outside the toilets, slid on her cell phone, to chase the soaps, or using the video-voice messaging, to talk to her young who doesn’t live close to her, and, on this, fast-paced, floor, she’d become, an odd sort of, a freezeframe.

Several short conversations I’d held with her, I’d become, acquainted with her, she’d treated me like a granddaughter too, shown me care and concerns, even showed me, how to wash my hands completely, before I leave the restrooms, without knowing, that I was, awarded, the champion of hand washing in my preschool years.  And I’d known, that her children and grandchildren had, immigrated to Germany a long time ago, that in her eighties, she lives alone, and there were, hints of, loneliness and loss, in her words.

After the lunch break that day, I brought two drinks back.  And, as I’d, handed one to her, she’d become confused and asked, “Why are you treating me to this?  I’d never, given you, anything!”, I’d smiled and replied, “it’s not necessary!  Grandma works very hard, I hope this drink will, keep you energetic and your spirits up for the rest of the day!” then, I saw that flower, bloomed, radiantly, on her face.

Think on it, the elderly woman, never actually, given anything physical to me, but, that sort of concern and care she’d, shown my daily, was way more precious, than any sort of materials.

And so, this, is how we can learn to, interact with one another more, but we often got trapped up too much in our selves, had all our heads, UP our own, separate asses, to ever realize, that someone else close by is feeling bad, loss, or whatever, and, because we failed, to notice that these individuals we come across from day to day are in need, we missed, the opportunities, to show our cares and concerns, and, lose the chances of, making that, important connection, and that’s, just, very sad, wouldn’t you say???

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Awareness, Cause & Effect, Connections, Kindness Shown, Lessons, Life, Observations, Old Age, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Story-Telling, Values

The Season of the Frost

As death, slowly, takes over, the living, translated…

The afternoon sun came in, from the southwest side, the light that weren’t, blocked out, by the house next door, slanted down, lazily, imprinted itself, onto the patio, reflecting the rhombus pattern of the screen door, her black cat, Charcoal lay, on that patch of sun that’s, on the ground, it seemed, that he was, unwilling, to leave that spot.

As she stared, at this frame, there came, the eyes of that elderly woman, the elderly face was, so thin, with the deepening of the wrinkles on her face, her skin, dark in complexion, very thin in its, layer, with one eye, slanted, and the eye that stared at people, it’d, looked, extremely, delicate, with the corner lifted upward.  Maybe, back when the elderly was a younger woman, she was, beautiful, it’s just, that the year drifted too far away from her now, and, she’s not related to her, and so, she can, only, make her own guesses on her.

what that, looked, like…查看來源圖片photo found online

She’s, a caretaker, taking the shifts from the night previous.  The elderly woman is close to eighty years of age, not even forty kilograms in weight, quite weak in physique, and even so, she’d still, insisted on, taking herself to the bathrooms.  She’d, taken into considerations her stature, and wanted to allow the elderly to have what’s left of her own, dignity, she’d, allowed the elderly, to lean on her, and took her to the bathroom, and, as the night got deeper, she’d, made the trips, many more times.  The elderly always, sat on the toilet a long time, and, as she helped her back into bed, she could hear the elderly pant like a dog.  As the nurse saw, she’d, grilled her, to NOT help her go to the bathrooms again, that she could just, let the elderly go in her diapers.  Later she’d, taken care of the diapers’ worth of brownish, sticky material.  As the families learned of this, they’d told, that in these recent ten days, the woman lacked an appetite, and didn’t eat anything when they took her home, only had the liquid nutritional drinks, how can she expel so much waste.  As she heard, her heart went colder, and reminded the families in a round and about way, that they need to be, prepared.  What she couldn’t tell them was, please, take your mother home with you, so the high tech devices, don’t drag her life out for longer than it should’ve, lasted.

As the elderly woman was lying there, she’d, used her delicate eyes, asked, “Miss, can you please give me some medications, that I can take, and just, die.”  Then, “I’m going to find my dad now.” And from time to time, she’d, hung her head down low, held tight to her tiny achy frame, mumbled on, “I’m going to die”.

As the day broke, the families came by, the elderly started grilling them, “are you, leaving me here, to die?”, her children were about fifty or sixty years of age, looked honest enough, but without a clue, and, as they’d heard their mother’s questions, they’d, seemed, helpless, rebutted, “We sent you here to get better, how can we leave you here, to die?”  the nurse told the families to go outside, she’d watched the loved ones, nodded away like bobbleheads, they started, writing something down on a sheet of paper that the nurses handed them.

this, is what the end, might, look like…查看來源圖片photo from online

At around noon, the medical staff, suddenly, gathered around in the room.  The families, as well as she, were, ushered outside.  In a panic, the elderly had, multiple tubes going in and out of her body: the trachea, the feeding tubes through the nose, connected to the stomach, the catheter, the drips, with some tranquilizer, the elderly lost consciousness, with the oxygen mask over her face, the assortments of drips on the poles, then, the entire bed, got wheeled off, into the I.C.U.

She received a day’s worth of nurse’s pays, dragged out her luggage, walked, on the golden sun rays of the season of the frost, as the golden sunshine was about, to get off the clock.

As she arrived home, there were the cats, and no humans around, her kids had all grown up and left home, her husband no longer alive.  She’d put a kettle on, gone to pick the two sticks of chamomiles out in her yard, on lemon grass, three leaves of mint, made it, into a cup of, lightly, sweetened, light green solution.  As she’d, found her calm again, she’d recalled, a patient she couldn’t, let go of as she was being trained as a caretaker, it was, also, an elderly of eighty or ninety years of age, she’d helped turned him over in the bed, and, as she’d touched his body, she’d found, that the man was, so stiffened up, that he’d, looked like a curled up shrimp, most of the patients she worked for, as she’d helped them flip over, would sigh, and yelp, but this elderly man, is a dead body, with just, one breath left inside of him, like a cookie, she’d turned him, left, and then, right, no response, there’s, no changes in the lines on his body, or posture, he’d, stuck on the hospital bed, and it’s, actually, abandonment, in the name, of terminal care, how long had it been, since someone, helped moved his muscles?  Otherwise, how could he be, so stiff?  And yet, the people around him, they’re sliding on their cell phones, eating their meals, and just, busying themselves, around, and about.

The sun had, retracted, to a corner on the lanai now, the rhombus shaped pattern now, gone, Charcoal hopped, into her lap.  She’d, patted that body of color, Charcoal started, purring at her.  The elderly with the corners of the eyes lifting upward, your wings of youth had already been, put up, stored away, inside, that long hallway of time, without all those, tubes to keep you alive, hmmmmmmmmm, it’s, hard to, say.————She took a small sip of the light scent, then asked Charcoal who’s in her lap, “the season of the frosts has arrived, do you know that?  And the days, go fast one by one, vanished, do you know, what a, good spot you were lying in awhile ago!”

And so, for this woman, in her line of work, she’d, seen it all, because she took care of the terminal patients, who are, on the verge of dying, and in taking care of these elderly, she’d, seen everything, from how the bodies are, no longer, capable of sustaining life on their own, of how the only thing that’s, keeping these bodies alive, are the machines, and tubes in the arms, connecting to the machines, and how the families refused, to let go of their elderly parents, and just, keep on, making them suffer even longer!

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Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Awareness, Cost of Living, Expectations, Lessons, Letting Go, Life, Observations, Old Age, On Death & Dying, Philosophies of Life, Right to Die, Story-Telling, the Finality of Life, Things Left Behind