Category Archives: Awareness

What’s the BEST Way, to Let Someone Know, that S/he is, Making You, Uncomfortable???

And I still have to apologize, for being, a bit, BLUNT, ‘cuz sometimes, that’s, the ONLY way to GET the point across, for those who just don’t get it, hello, hello, hello???

What’s the BEST way, to let someone know, that s/he is, making you uncomfortable???  Surely, you can, throw them stupid signals around, hoping that s/he picks up on it, but, chances are, the person is way too mother @#$%ING (maxed out!) retarded to pick that up!

But, I can’t, just say to the guy/woman: hey YO!  BACK OFF!  Can I?  That’s just not, socially, “Acceptable” is it?  Nope!

And yet, there’s, NO easy way, but to just, bluntly, state it ALOUD sometimes, so, stop worrying about how you will make the other person feel (I mean, WHO cares!  And, isn’t how YOU feel more important than how the other person feels???)

That’s, just one of the harder things of being human, I suppose, for SOME of you out there, but not for the QUEEN for, the QUEEN, still SPEAKS her M-I-N-D here, out loud too!!!

Just like Murphy had done, I’d, TELL someone, STRAIGHT up, if s/he is, making ME, uncomfortable, and you should too, otherwise, there will, be those who are out, to take advantage, and by then, you got, NOBODY else to blame, ‘cuz, you’d, ENABLED, the other person’s, improper behaviors…

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Filed under Awareness, Cause & Effect, Choices, Communications, Coping Mechanisms, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Socialization

Obstruction of Spousal Rights: the Harder the Individual Cheated, the More the Person’s Made to Pay in Civil Court

That ought to, TEACH you, mother FUCKING cheats, to BEHAVE your selves out there all right!  HARSHER punishment for infidelity here, protecting the rights of your spouses!!!  Off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

Last year, as the decriminalization of adultery was, signed into law, the payments in the civil courts suits became, the LAST line of defense for protecting spousal rights.  Recently, there was the famous married sports figure having been found with an unknown male out, and the rented stay of a member of the city representatives, the legal realms pointed out, that although there’s NO solid proof of adultery, but the behaviors had, breached the “rights of the spouses”  And, sorting through the related verdicts of the courts for the past two years, the more severe these breaches in spousal rights were, the amounts are higher, from thousands of dollars to millions of dollars.

In the past, on the matter of the couple’s handling cheating, because there’s a more severe mandate for what constitutes as “adultery”, so long as there are no solid evidence to prove that sexual intercourse took place, it would be, quite, difficult, for the charges of adultery to stick; as the decriminalization of adultery signed into law, the adulterers won’t get charged criminally, but, because of the civil laws protected the citizens, there are the clauses of the law, the party who was cheated on can seek out payment from the civil front.

The attorney, Wang stated, that the definition of “spousal rights” legally meant the rights protected by the law based off of ethics, of family; once one of the spouses crossed that line, then, the other party can sue the cheating party on the civil front for payment.

Based off of the verdict inquiry systems of the courts, in recent years, there was a wife who’d found her husband, flirting on LINE, his got sued, and the courts made him pay $70,000N.T.s; the wife found to have hugged and kissed a male coworker, the husband received the payments of $160,000N.T.s; the wife found the husband to have sexually illicit texts on LINE, with the photos, paid $200,000N.T.s; the husband cheated on the wife with a female employee for seven years, had twins with the female employees, the wife was paid over millions of dollars.

And this, is only, on the legal fronts, how about, the EMOTIONAL distress, the betrayals of the one getting cheated on, NO amount is, going to EVER, make UP for that, because the damage’s done already, and, there’s, just NO way that anybody, can help you make up for that, NOT even if this brand new “amendment” that enforces HARSHER punishments for the CHEATING parties, so this is just, a bullshitting law that THINKS that it can, protect spousal rights, but it can’t, not really!

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Filed under "Professional" Opinions, Awareness, Commiting Adultery, Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Expectations, Extramarital Affairs, Improper Misconducts, Infidelities/Being Unfaithful, Legislature, Life, On the Wrong Side of the Law, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, sexual misconducts

That Day, Unknown

On watching her husband, suffer, with his terminal illness, waiting, for death to come and, claim him, translated…

That day, my husband was, wheeled into the treatment room, had a “smooth ride” of his cancer treatment processes, no loss of hair, no losing all his weight, he’d only, complained of aches and pains more often, and as the primary treating physician visited his ward, he’d only, begged him for more pain meds, but, after the pains subsided, another sort of illness, took him over.

One afternoon, I’d, rushed off to the hospital, it was the call of the caretaker from the bed next to his.  I’d never seen him like this before, lips trembling continually, kept apologizing repeatedly, I’m sorry, I’m, sorry, the group of doctors hovered over his bed, and started discussing, and because my husband was in and out of comas, and started calling aloud things that don’t make sense, fearing that it might affect the other patients who shared the same room as he, they’d decided to wheel him into the treatment room.

查看來源圖片
as he’d, become like this…photo from online

And after that we’d, taken, that downhill slope toward, the bottom, he could laugh and chat at first, but, with his getting diagnosed with acute pneumonia, he had an intubation, and because of how the hospital worried that he might hurt himself, they’d, restrained him with the cloth bands to his bed, and his elbows now, bruised up, with the days that came and went, his skins ulcered.  Every day, he’d slept, waken up, waken up, and slept, and can only, stare at the ceilings, as he’d come home from work from before, he’d, ranted, incessantly on what went on during his work day, he can, no longer speak a single word now, and it must be, too, trying for him.

At first, my husband mapped out his, recovery plan, placed it at the bottom of his, desk drawer, he had a strong will to survive then, was optimistic on this path to, defeat cancer, and yet, months passed by, the life and death that came and went in the hospital wards, the elderly who was still there on the next bed, got wheeled out with a white cloth covering the bed today, my husband also, transferred from the normal wards, into the I.C.U., and connected to the machines to live now.

Once, I’d, gotten closed to his ears, told him, “if you still want to live, nod”.  And it wasn’t, as I’d expected, a nod, he’d shaken his head then, for a very, very, long time, with the tears that stained up a huge chunk of his, pillow.  While I, too selfish, can only, struggle within my own self, after I’d made up my mind, I’d still, tried to keep the moments of visiting him in the hospital afterwork, again, and again, and again, hour by hour, and, begged for that, unknown day, to finally, come.

And so, this, is how difficult it is, to watch someone you love very dearly, get tortured by his, illness, and, at the start he had this strong will to survive, thought he was going to, overcome, but, as time went by, he grew weaker, sicker, and now, he can only, lie in his hospital bed, and wait for death, and there’s, nothing you CAN do for him, save for, sign that DNR on his, behalf now.

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Filed under Awareness, Do-Not-Resuscitate, Life, On Death & Dying, Properties of Life, Right to Die, the Finality of Life, The Right to Choose How One Will Die, Values

Peeping, Through, the Ice Caves

Thoughts of the encounters the writer’s had in Antarctica, translated…

“Using a pipe to see the skies”, this ancient phrase is used to describe the shortsightedness of some, or the humbling of the speaker.

Using a tiny bamboo pipe, looking through the tiny hole of that pipe, seeing anything toward the other end, from the ratios of mathematics, it doesn’t, fit correctly.  The objects are way too huge, the hole, too tiny, how can you see the whole picture?  But, think on it using a different angle, the concept of “quality”, you can see the corner of that mountain so green, which is, enough, to lift our, spirits!

photo from UDN.com

窺望,從冰窟。(圖╱楊恩生)  
taken by the writer…

Following the eyes of the photographers, the artists, from the hole in the ice caves, to see the views that the exploration ships saw from a hundred odd years ago, it surely was, moving, and, it’s, comparable to seeing the starry nights from million years ago from the lens of the telescope!

And so, this, is how we’re all, linked to our separate, and collective pasts, no matter how hard we tried to deny it, because, we’re, still all here, sharing this, common environment, and maybe, what you see is not, exactly what I see, because we have, different perspectives, different interpretations of things we encounter in the world, but that, is how the experiences are, common, and different, at the, same time.

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Filed under Awareness, Lessons, Life, Observations, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Pictures, Properties of Life, The Observer Effect

Everything that’s, Riding, on This, Upcoming American Election

A matter of concern, for the WHOLE country, I tell ya, that, is what this SHIT is!

Everything that’s, riding, on this, upcoming American election, but, hey, we are, citizens of the R.O.C., of this place called, “Taiwan”, so why on this !@$$ING (maxed out???) earth, is the livelihoods, the lives of the citizens across the god damn, PACIFIC, riding on this upcoming American election again?

Oh yeah, it’s ‘cuz, this country, a place called, “Taiwan”, became the BITCH of the U.S. of A.  Think about it, the government agreed to the importing of American pork, beef, with all those, chemicals that might cause cancer, or something else (how the hell should I know???), because we want the protection of the good ol’ glory, while, the “great country” of the U.S. of A, is still, as opportunistic as ever.

And the government is still, just CLUELESS, believing, how wow, if U.S. is on our sides, we won’t have to worry about a coup de ’tat of China, I mean, look at what became of Hong Kong after its “lease terms” by England had been up, I mean, after the “Communist takeover” that island, sank, didn’t it?

To protect us from the same fates as Hong Kong, we must believe, that the U.S. would take our sides, if a war is in the future!

But, take a note of this: the “Good Ol’ Glory” had been opportunistic since the beginning of time (don’t ask when that was!), take for instance, the World Wars: if the Japs didn’t BOMB Pearl Harbor, would the U.S. head into the world war fronts?  HECK no.  And, don’t MENTION the Vietnam War in the sixties (right???), it was only a civil war in the country, but, the U.S. overinterpreted it as a COMMIE takeover, and thus, sent all those soldiers over there, to fight a war that they don’t have a place in in the first place.IN

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Filed under Awareness, Expectations, Government, Policies, & Politics, Issues of the Society, Life, Observations, Professional Opinions, Properties of Life, Stupidity, Wake Up Calls

The Mixture Drugs Rose Up to Second as More & More Students Get Addicted

The new “breeds” of drugs, even more addictive!  Off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The Zhongzhen University hosted its Prevention of Adolescent Drug Abuse seminar yesterday, the district attorney from Kaohsiung D.A.’s Office, Gu pointed out, that the mix-type of drugs in the coffee pouches was ranked third on the student addictions in 2017, two years ago and last, these rose up to second, right after ketamine, strongly recommended the schools and the police start collaborating together, to rid the drugs off of the campuses.

Gu stated, that the police confiscated over 100,000 drug coffee pouches, the highest since 2012, and that there were the level three, level four new age drugs mixed into the mixtures, based off of the estimates of the coroners’ office, there was a hike in drug-related deaths last year during fourth quarter, as many as forty-two cases, and in just first quarter this year, there’d been forty-two cases, and the number grew to fifty-six by second quarter, and in just July and August, there were, twenty-eight cases.

She’d pointed out, that the drug drip-coffee packs often had the second level controlled substances PMMA, third level controlled substances mephedrone, Erimin, taking one pack doesn’t do a thing, but if the user took multiple packs, and combined with ketamine, the users are more than likely to overdose and die, from January of last to September of this year, there are already 120 who’d died of overdose, of them, sixty-three were from twenty to twenty-nine years of age.

She said, that the age group of using level three to four controlled substances are mostly those between eighteen and twenty-four, thirty-five percent; and, there’s, a lowered age of first-time users, there were 1,878 persons who’d started abusing the drugs for the first time in the ages between eighteen and twenty-four.

Because the schools feared being labeled, it’s hard to crack down on the drugs infiltrating the campuses, Gu suggested, that the school should file the reports with the school safety committee, then, the committee then send the reports anonymously to the police departments locally.

And so, because you don’t want the reputations of your schools ruined, you are more than likely to under report the citing, and this is not good, because if you don’t report the right numbers, the numbers are just going to, increase by the day, because the law enforcement agencies can’t step in on time!

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Filed under Awareness, Cause & Effect, Drugs Infiltrating Campuses, Life, Lives Lost, News Stories, Nowhere Is Safe, Observations, Professional Opinions, Properties of Life, Substances Abuse, Wake Up Calls, White Picket Fence

Temporarily Escaping from the Volcanoes the Neighbors Became a Key Helper to Prevention of Domestic Violence

The ABSOLUTE necessary SAFETY net that needs to get set up that’s for sure!  Off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

The associate professor of Minchuan University’s Crime Prevention Major, Dai pointed out, that the American scholars conducted a survey of up to a thousand individuals who bore witness to child abuse, found that a-third of males are inclined to model after their fathers and become abusers themselves, two-thirds of females modeled after their mothers, became victim/enablers.  There’s a lacking of this sort of research data here in Taiwan, what’s worrisome is, that even though there’s more focus on women’s rights, the Taiwanese women still couldn’t break away from the traditions, and, the young children who bore witness to abuse still continued to hide behind their helpless mothers, trapped in fear.

Dai said, the American child neurologist, Perry discovered, that children as young as two years and nine months can feel the conflicts in the atmospheres, and this will affect their frontal lobes, which is in charge of focus and cognition the most, as well as the hippocampus, responsible for interpersonal relations and intimacy.

Dai found that for children who bore witness to violence develop that sense of shame, and as adolescents, they wanted to escape from home, and would act out by becoming truant.  The more the children bore witness to violence, once they get lost, it’s easy, that these children will join gangs.

photo from UDN.com

各縣市政府委託民間團體投入目睹兒關懷輔導服務,社工依據個案年紀等需求安排遊戲治療,引導年幼孩子表達內心感受,也撫平心中的傷。圖/善牧基金會高雄中心提供
the way the neighbors can help keep a child safe…

Two yeas ago the case that shocked the entire society in Chien-Zhen District, Kaohsiung, with the bodies on ice, the ignition point was the man, Ting’s long-term abuse on his wife and children, his wife got so furious, told their son, “you need to make him (her husband) disappear from our lives for good”, and in the end, the mother and son murdered the man together.  Dai stated, that in recent years, the cases of murder by children are mostly caused by domestic violence, the children saw their mother get abused by their father, and, accumulated the anger or in a moment of anger, crimes were, committed.

The Kaohsiung Teachers’ College associate professor, Wei told, that when parents used violence to control everything, the children will learn, that violence is the only way to resolve things, and some of children raised in such an environment become abusers.  The social workers needed to give counsel to those who bore witness to these acts of violence, but currently, there’s only, limited resources the government puts into this.

Dai suggested that the schools, the communities, the medical facilities can all work together, to have a stronger effect, to set up an attachment relationship of trust.  The teachers should NEVER carry the attitude of “once you’re out of school you’re not my responsibility!”, they are the keys to keep the children’s minds and bodies safe.

A lot of people would turn a blind eye to the neighbors’ business, but the protection of children exposed to abuse, the neighbors can step in at the right time, when the parents start fighting, the children can temporarily head over to the neighbors to work on the homework, and the neighbors would do a great job in protecting these children.

And so, because of the prevalence of these domestic violence cases, and children being raised under such an environment, it’s not healthy for the children, this is why the neighbors need to be a sort of a safety net, because if you don’t look out for someone who’s in need, when you’re in need, nobody’s going to care about you either, and it still, goes, both ways!

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Abuse, Awareness, Childhood, Domestic Violence, The Education of Children, Vicious Cycle

The Sixth Grader Ran on the Track Field, Became a Vegetable, the School Mandated to Pay the Families

Knowing this student’s heart condition, the instructor still made him run, that’s why the school is mandated to pay!  Off of the Front Page Sections, translated…

Four years ago, a sixth grade boy with a heart condition, ran around the school track, fell down, he was rushed to the hospital, and became a vegetable, the families filed a suit toward the country, the Taichung District Court found that school needed to pay the boy’s families until he turned twenty, the amount of over $40,000N.T. per month for the medical fees, and over $20,000N.T. per month extra until he’s sixty, that the amount of over $4.36 million N.T. needed to be paid to the boy and his mother for emotional distress.

The parents told, that filing the suit against the country is to get justice for their son who’s “growing up but never waking up”, and they hoped that their son will be the last victim of the negligence of the school campuses, the school already filed for an appeal.

The verdict stated, that the boy had a congenital heart condition, isn’t fitted for hard exercises, and all his teachers knew this.

On the morning of October 20th, 2016, the homeroom instructor told the whole class to get on the track field to practice running, and the instructor stayed in the class, not gone out to keep an eye on the students, allowed the boy to run two laps, the boy started swaying left and right, limping, and started panting, turning pale, along with other symptoms that he was not will.  The homeroom instructor saw, but didn’t call the ambulance immediately, the student was carried by another instructor to the nurse’s office, where the nurse performed CPR, until the paramedics arrived.

The judge believed, that the homeroom instructor wasn’t monitoring the boy when he was running, and not paid enough attention to how he was afterwards, and as the boy passed out, she’d not called the ambulance on time, that it all fitted into negligent in care, that the school should pay for the damages on behalf of the country.

And so, because you weren’t paying enough attention to this student with a HEART condition, and you made him run the laps, that’s why you’re, responsible, for his death, and the school got sued for it, because of the teacher’s not paying enough attention to the student’s health conditions.

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Filed under Awareness, Being Exposed, Carelessness of Adults, Cause & Effect, Children with Rare Conditions & Special Needs, Choices, Cost of Living, Death by Negligence, Excuses, Lives Lost, Negligence, Negligence Homicide, News Stories, Properties of Life, Tragedies in the World

Why Feel Loss, as Life Approaches its Dusk

A second life, the right attitude to take, toward aging here, translated…

Few years before I retired, every year I’d find some time, to travel around the island for a few days with my wife, or, work with the time schedules of the local celebrations, and it’d always, left those, memories so memorable to us.

As I retired, all of us, coworkers, good friends all regained our own freedoms of mind and body back, and, we no longer just, traveled as couples, but, hollered out to those who will join us, and, the group of us would tour everywhere, to hike up the mountains, and, the frequencies turned from once a month to weekly trips.

And, every time we’d gone out with different people, and, we had different habits, and, getting along with each other became, something we all had to, work on.  But thankfully, everybody is’ older, and we can, all learn, to tolerate each other, and find that delicate, balance, which made these trips, good experiences, very memorable.

Some say, the best assets as we entered into our elderly years, is to have friends with whom we can share things with.  Surely, in this aging community, the younger generations aren’t willing, or without the time, to stay close to the elders that they have, and, we, the aging need to have that understanding, to know, that having the company of old friends, so we won’t, lose the center of our lives.

And, looking on the world, there are, too many, disasters, and my friends were all touched by them, we couldn’t, predict, at what moment, these things can, befall onto us, and we’d, learned, that living in the moment is the most important; especially where we are in our lives, we should, take a hold onto, that colorful sunset, before the sun goes down, so we don’t, waste our lives.

Growing old is a process we must all face, but, no need to feel stressed.  The old saying stated it well, “knowing how beautiful the sunset is, no need to fear when the sun sets.”, how to keep life radiant, colorful, fulfilled, it’s all reliant on your selves; gather around with a group of friends, to go outdoors, to immerse yourselves in nature, it’s, not a bad idea!

And so, as life slows itself down, you’re, nearing the sunsets of your lives, and, instead of feeling worried over death, you should take this attitude of having been through everything, and start enjoying your life after retirement, because you never know when your lives are ending, so you should, take advantage, to live out the rest of your aging life better!

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Filed under Aging Gracefully, Awareness, Life, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Retirement

The Supper He Made

So glad that it’s NOT my day to cook today!!!  Translated…

Looking at the table’s worth of food he’d prepared, I was, moved, became, dumbfounded!  The steamed crab, the pepper shrimps, the pan-seared tofu, the ginseng black-boned chicken…………all of which are, my favorites.

But three months ago before, from when my husband started, cooking the suppers on the weekends, it wasn’t, that wonderful scent of food that made my mouth watered that came out of the kitchen, and, what he’d made then, tasted, exactly like what I would take out to throw as trash, what’s worse was, he would NOT allow anybody, to criticize his, cooking skills.

To fight to my right to NOT cook on the weekends, I’d fought with him, for almost five years, him being, too macho, and no matter what, he just couldn’t accept the fact, that I do NOT want to cook on the weekends.  Back then he’d stated it too clearly, that we can go out to eat every now and then, but not every weekend.

Being raised by the feminist era, I naturally could NOT accept the time that women are allowed to have off from being a wife and/or a mother.  Taking care of the family during the week, I know I’m reasonable, for NOT wanting to make the meals on the weekends.  Should the mothers shoulder everything?

圖/Dofa
illustration from UDN.com

And, we’d disagreed, more and more, and the meals on the weekends became, a war zone, the stresses was, building, I just, wanted to, get away from the warzone, and every time weekend rolled around, I’d, wanted to, not go home for supper, and not wanted my own families to worry, in the end, I can only, wander alone on the streets.  Then, my husband got into a silent treatment war, and I felt, defeated, over my own marriage.

One day, at supper, my child asked me abruptly, what his grandma liked to eat from what I cooked?  I was stumped, then, said, “tell the truth, I’d never cooked anything for your grandmother ever!”

My child was surprised, “What?  Grandma had never had anything you cooked?”

My husband who was already finished, looked at me instantly, then, lowered his head back to his cell phone.

I told my son, “before I wed, I was my mother’s baby girl, she’d never made me cook, told me that cooking was hard and hot, and even as we go home to visit her, she still wouldn’t allow me to cook.”

“So, is that why you cook so much right now, because you love it?”, he continued asking.  “I don’t like to cook, actually, I HATE it!”

“Then why are you cooking every day?”, my son actually hoped that he could have burgers every day.

“because nobody will cook for me, because I need to watch out for your health!  That’s why I’d, grit my teeth, and no matter how I hated it, I still, cooked every single day!”

his turn to cook!

photo from online

At this time, my husband’s cell phone had, turned black and he’d, failed to notice, because he was too focused, “eavesdropping” on my son and I.  And, this conversation may have, touched some part of him, and, he’d, turned that into the table’s worth of meal three months later, on this, very day.

And so, all it took, was for you, to LET your husband KNOW, that you got tired of having to make every single meal, but, he’d not understood, because you NEVER told him verbally, because you probably thought, that he should, already KNOW it, but he didn’t, NOT until he’d eavesdropped into that conversation you had with your son.

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Filed under Awareness, Choices, Gender Roles, Life, Marriages, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life