Tag Archives: Reconnecting

We’ve Never Met

On modern-day interactions, translated…

Some people whom I’d never met, and, don’t know if they have the chances of meeting one another in life, but had become, this light scent of nostalgia to me.

For instance, T, one of my friends on Facebook, a man with a warm smile, and deep eyes, the articles he’d posted are very well-written, and he’d lightly disclosed, how three years ago, he was diagnosed with a rare illness, that it’d turned his views of life upside down, and, since, his writings showed this brand new understanding, this new kind of clarity about life.

One day, I’d recalled how it’s been a very long time, since I saw anything from him, and I’d gone of Facebook, to check out his page, then, I’d gotten to know, through someone else’s posting, that he was currently engaged in a tug-of-war with death in the I.C.U.  Since then, I’d gone on his Facebook page to check on him, hoped to get the message, that he’d made a full recovery.  And I’d often prayed to God, to look out for T, he once had such passions for life!

Another friend, C, one day, he’d also vanished, and, he canceled his Facebook account too.  What happened?  Why did he close his account?  In reality, C and I had NO shared friends, and so, I couldn’t find out how he was, even if I wanted to.  C is one of those lowkey people, who used a piece of photography as his display picture, and, the name he used was his initials, I have NO idea what was going on with him in real life.  And still, in the psychological sense, he’s such an interesting person, would use his humorous, and unique way, to reply to all of my postings, and it’d become nostalgic to me.  Having lost a Face friend such as he, I felt very awful.

And, don’t remember how long ago afterwards it was, I’d picked up a book I’d ordered online from a bookstore, as I’d told the cashier my name, after I’d gotten the book, was about to walk out, a man called out to me.  He looked very handsome, with this clean aura about him, but, I was certain, we’d never met.  He said, he was, once my friend, on Facebook.

Once?  I’d inquired.  He said, yes, he’d not logged on Facebook anymore, because someone made an anonymous complain about his account, his account was canceled, and so, he’d stopped using Facebook altogether.  “Actually, it’s a good thing, it’d given me more time, to do other things, it’s just that I regretted saying goodbye to some of the friends I’d shared deep conversations with is all.”  And so, as he’d heard me say my name to the cashier, he was so happy, that he could tell all of this to me to my face.

And, all of a sudden, I’d said his initials which had been erased completely from my mind previously.  And, his smiles became more radiant, “You still remembered me?”

I smiled too, “Of course!  I’m really glad, that I ran into you.”  Thanks to this chance meeting, it’d resolved ALL the questions I have about his disappearing on Facebook.

Back then, we’d started chatting, carried on like we were old friends, recalled some of the interactions we’d shared on Facebook.  Then, without leaving ANY ways of getting into contact with one another, we’d parted ways again.  I still don’t know his real name, or anything else about him, but that was unimportant.  Being able to meet back up with him, was more than enough for me.

Facebook had gotten those who originally had nothing in common together, like how a cloud, bumped into another cloud, or how a duckweed, swam into another duckweed.  In the world online, we’re close, and we’re far apart, maybe we would get forgotten by the world, and, we may become one another’s questioning thoughts.  Turns out, that in our not being aware of it, some of the interactions already had feelings infiltrated into them, and when we don’t see one another, we’d start to care and concern, and also, miss, each other.

This, is how friendships continued AFTER you’d logged off, and that still just shows, how even though you are making a ton of friends online, you should still WORK on the interpersonal relationships you have offline, because you don’t want to have a ZILLION friends on your social networking sites, but, ZERO friends in reality, do you?  I wouldn’t think so.

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Filed under Cause & Effect, Connections, Facebook, Friendships, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, Online Relationships, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Socialization, Translated Work, Trends

A Birthday Party for a Group Ages Up to a Thousand Years Old

On the ins and outs of life here, translated…

We’d taken the advantage of the time that Mei-Yu who’d immigrated to Canada came back, we’d rounded everybody up, to head to Maokong on a weekday, to celebrate our sixtieth birthdays.

“Who celebrates their sixties?”, this, was a question, posed by not just those we are friends with her, but also, friends who had moved abroad too.

The leader of the group wrote a very long message, “the government had set up group weddings from time to time, we will also be hosting, a group birthday.  From being in the same classes as thirteen-year-olds, it’d already been forty-seven years since, and, most of the classmates are already sixty, whether or not you had met the ‘requirements’ or surpassed it, we’d hoped for all of us, with the combined age of at least a thousand, to head over to Maokong for a birthday celebration.”

And, immediately, a former classmate who’s retired wrote back, and, those who are still working tried to convince the group, that the gathering should be held on a weekend; and, those who’d become grandmothers had even asked, “Can I take along my two-year-old grandchild?”, and, the leader of our class said NO to all.  As for those classmates who are in the U.S. can only see how passionate those of us in Taiwan are discussing the matter.

That day, we’d found a group of ten members, although, we couldn’t add up to over a thousand years in age, but, this, was as perfect as it got.

We’d gone to the chicken shops to get fed, all the items were amazing in taste to us.  The Maokong Gondola looks out toward the 101 that shot straight into the clouds, Mei-Yu used her cell and took shots unstop, the beautiful scenes matched well with the savory foods.  And still, when the waiter brought in the specialty peaches for us, everybody exclaimed, turns out, this, was the set up, by the leader of our group, and everybody who was there appreciated her careful thought, and named her honorary leader.  We’d lifted our glasses, and wished everybody happy birthday, and gave hooray to our friendships, and made a date, to come up every year.

After the meal, the leader of the entertainments led us, walked from the hiking trails to the back mountains of the Politics University.  The trails was very easy, but, we can see, how those who failed to keep up with regular exercises had paled by comparisons to the rest.

At the moment, the group leader decided, that she will be gathering us all, for the activities regularly, and, Ding immediately said no, and, the rest of us also.  As we walked, we recalled the past, how fast the time flew, what we’d shared in the past had already become blurred out, and, everybody recalled differently, and so, we’d decided, that at least three members of the party must agree on an issue, for it to be valid, and, those of us who’d gotten into our first choice of schools are no longer bragging about our amazing memories.

We’d gone on this fun trip, holding hands, and, our friendships were just as it was from the day we met.  Everybody was celebrating our combined sixtieth birthday.

So, this, is how you can connect with your long-term lost-contact with friends, by hosting gatherings regularly, and, keeping up with everybody is truly very hard, but, this group still made the time, because they cherished one another’s friendships very much.

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Filed under Facebook, Friendships, Interpersonal Relations, Life, Observations, The Teenage Years, Translated Work

Sharing, the Biggest Kind of Blessings

How to successfully retire, translated…

Feng-Land was my classmate from teacher’s college, and we were both in the “language group”, but since we graduated and gotten to our separate schools, she’d gone to Taichung, while I’d gone into the armed services by accident, slowly, I’d drifted away from my classmates from teacher’s college, and lost contact with her as well.

Two decades later, once I’d gone, by the directions of the principal at the school I worked in, to visit a couple of the elementary schools’ principals in Kaohsiung, and I’d chatted with a principal named He, and, I’d learned, that he was, Feng-Lang’s husband.

By coincidence, awhile later, as I’d moved into a new community, I’d met Feng-Lang while she was out, strolling along with her husband, turns out, we lived only two blocks from each other, and, we, the original classmates, became neighbors.

After I’d learned, that Feng-Lang and her husband lived close by, I’d gone to their place to chit chat, to have some tea, to have some fruits, and, as I was about to leave their place each and every time, she’d had me bring along a bag of fruits and vegetables.  I feel so bad, about taking all the things from them, but, I couldn’t turn them down, after all, that was the kind of no agricultural insecticides, home-grown vegetable and fruits, hard as they were to buy on the marketplaces, and, even harder, to get them for free.

And just so, I’d gotten many calls since from Feng-Lang, wanted me to head over to her place, to pick up the vegetables, and, the assortment of produces were from their home in Menon, without the agricultural pesticides and fresh too.

Feng-Lang and her husband were both from Menon, a pair of childhood sweethearts.  They’d often taken the time, to head home, to visit their aging parents, and gone into the fields to work too, and when the timing was right, they’d brought the “fruits of their labors” home, to share.

Because we’re neighbors, and, when I’d met gotten invited to the teacher’s banquet or friends’ gathering, I’d always wanted to invite Hsiu-Lang and her husband to come with me, but, they’re too busy, and could only make the occasional appearances.

They’re both retired, what, would they have to busy themselves about on?  Other than household chores, there’s a TON for them to do!  Feng-Lang showed great interest in photograph, she’d poured her heart and soul into it, gone away to take shots of the sceneries, and, in order to capture the photos that she wanted to, she’d gone all over the island.

When Feng-Lang was out on her photography trips, her husband became her bodyguard and her driver, Feng-Lang had no worries then, and so, her skills in photography improved quickly, and, she’d gotten great remarks for her photographs.

Principal He went out with his wife on her photo shoots, and had “interned” from her, being exposed, he’d fallen in love with photography too, after he’d retired, he’d taken the leadership role, and poured his whole heart and soul into the hobby, and, the couple since then, shared this activity that they got to enjoy together.

Other than photography, they’d also did Chi-Gong, table tennis together, and, Principal He also volunteered, taught people to play the harmonica, tell the stories to the kids, they’re busy, jam-packing their retirement life, it’s no wonder, how hard it was, to get the two of them out for a meal with me.

But, no matter how busy they were, they’d always taken the time, to visit back home, to help out in the fields with the elderly, to accompany their parents, and that, is what I loved the most, because every time they’d gone back home, afterwards, I’d get a call from Feng-Lang, “Hey, come on over, to pick up some veggies!”

Being neighbors with my old classmate, it’s a very hard-to-come-by affinity, as for getting the homegrown, fresh produce without the agricultural poisons, that, is a blessing in itself.

And so, this, is what most people dream of here, to retire, and to have a patch of land, somewhere in the countryside, that they can plant fruits and vegetables on, and, this couple from above, are living out their retirement well, they have things they enjoyed separately, and things that they can enjoy together, and that, is the key, to making it work, after the two of you retired.

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Filed under Connections, Friendships, Interactions Shared with the World, Interpersonal Relations, Kindness Shown, Life, Observations, Planning for the Future, Retirement

A Mother and Daughter Date in the Springtime

On parent-child interactions here, translated…

On my daughter’s 21st, I gave her a heart-shaped puzzle, I’d written out my blessings for her in calligraphy, then, I’d mixed up the pieces, sent it out to her, and, after she receives, she’d had to put the puzzle back together on her own, to view my message.

Since my daughter was just a month of age, she’d be under the care of my mother-in-law, and my husband and I worked ninety kilometers away from her, and, only on the weekends, did I have the opportunity to go home to visit with her.  Not long thereafter, my son was born, we’d found a caretaker for him close by, and, on the weekends, the three of us would be together as a family.  And, my daughter who’s only one-and-a-half year older than my son felt that we didn’t love her anymore.

During the day time, I’d worked, in the nights, I’d cared for my son with my husband, and, I’d spent ALL of my spare moments, thinking, missing my daughter, that, was an unspeakable kind of sorrow for me.  On the weekends, I’d had to deal with my daughter’s unsettling nature, and I’d felt more defeated than ever.

Until my daughter turned seventeen, my husband and I had finally gotten the opportunity, to work closer to home.  At age eighteen, my daughter went to Taipei for university, I’d showed her my cares and concerns for her through phone calls, letters, e-mails, and Facebook.  The three years away from home made my daughter realized, that life is NOT at all easy on her own, and, whenever she’d come home, she’d said to me, “I’m so lucky, to be eating a home-cooked meal, made by you, mom!”, and, every word became so musical in my ears.

My daughter had slowly come to accept my love as a whole.  After the New Years, I wanted to go up north with her, and she’d agreed.  The two of us spent a day and a half together, we’d shopped, strolled the parks.  We both loved sweets, after supper, we’d shared a dessert together, and we were laughing and talking, and a surge of warmth and happiness filled up my entire heart.  That night, at her rental place, we’d lain together, and we’d talked a lot, “Back then I thought you only loved my younger brother, and so, I’d made my mind up, to THROW my temper tantrums whenever you’d come back to visit”, my daughter recalled.  Hearing how taken she’d felt as a kid, I’d come to understand, that her temper tantrums from younger year, and her bad attitude that made us worry back in her primary education years, were a way of a silent rebellion toward us.

And now, my daughter took me, strolled through the streets of Taipei; she’d steamed tea, put some coffee on, to allow me to savor; and prepared a warm bed for me to sleep in, etc., etc., etc.  I felt her love, and I knew, that she, is all grown up now.

That day, I’d seen a cherry tree outside a shop, with pinkish flowers, and the petals fall one by one.

And my emotions are JUST like the cherry tree, always looking toward to the springtime.  Even though, the wind is still form time to time, cold, but I really, really enjoy our mother-daughter shared time together.

And so, the daughter finally got OVER the feeling of unfairness from her childhood, and made nice with the mom, and, the mother’s love for her came, right in time, before it was too late, and that just shows you, that there is still a CHANCE, to re-connect with your children, but not always!!!

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Filed under Because of Love, Child Development/Education of Children, Childhood, Connections, Expectations, Family Dynamics, Family Matters, Life, Moods, Emotions, & Feelings, Observations, Parent-Child Interactions, Parenting/Parenthood, The Teenage Years, Translated Work, Values, Wake Up Calls

Give Each Other Another Chance

Why?  Because EVERYBODY D-E-S-E-R-V-E-S a second chance?  Well, let’s SEE about T-H-A-T!!!  Translated…

A few days ago, I’d gone out to dine with a group of my friends, in the midst of the happiness, my friend mentioned something that was unhappy to her, and, her tears overflowed, not only did she managed to use up ALL the napkins at our table in the restaurant, she’d also managed to use up ALL the tissues I’d carried with me, and still, her tears still fell nonstop.

Other than realizing the seriousness of the nature of the events she was telling me about, I’d asked the waiter to come over to help out.  Without knowing, that my friend, in an ease, pulled out a huge BOX of Kleenex from her bag, pulled a tissue out, wiped her own tears away, and said to us, “I’d come prepared, I just forgot that I’d packed a box.”  Everybody was stunned, and she’d started laughing out loud, right then and there.  Her!  She’d always be more than prepared, it’s an occupational hazard to herself.

This friend of mine had an amazing résumé, she was once the secretary of TWO big shots in the business world, is capable in everything, able-bodied, and intelligent too, the bosses had nothing but good things to say about her, even though she’d already left her two positions, her bosses would call her up and ask her how she’s doing from time to time, and from this, you can see, how she must’ve left an amazing impression with her post, that her bosses still missed her at work.

Back when I first met her, I was just a “freshman”, even though, I’d known about her pre-emptive tendencies, and that she is a hard-to-come by good friend, it’s just that back then, I was still very young, still wanted to enjoy my own life, I’d casted her, to the back of my mind, showed a lack of interest in her words and her behaviors, later, I’d blown her off rather than shared my innermost feelings, thoughts, and beliefs with her.  And, in a serious disagreement on our opinions, we’d split, gone separate ways, and, stopped speaking to one another for a total of TEN years.

I can’t say, that I didn’t hold a grudge against her, every time I’d talked to my other friends, I’d more or less, complained of her aloofness and her seriousness.  But in recent years, I’d grown to be more and more in awe toward her, and I was so fazed, as to how she managed to stay so simple hearted and truthful to herself, in this world of materialism.

At which time, I came to the shocking understanding, that she was more well-rounded and had more real-world experiences than I ever had, but, back when I first met her, that, was something I couldn’t have understood right away, and I’d wanted her to take me, the childish girl, underneath her wings without question, it must’ve been really hard on her too.  Later, after I’d gone through my own trials in the world, I’d finally come to appreciate her wisdom and her well-read nature, and this friendship had finally, started to bloom again.

Last year, I’d worked up the courage, to call her up, and I’d resolved this coldness between me and her instantaneously.  She’d treated me, with the trust, care and concerns, as if nothing had happened between us, the ten years of blank pages, got filled up in a few days of talking together, as if nothing EVER happened between me and her, and we’d become more in-tune than we once were too.

Making friends is like waiting for wine to ferment, when the taste is off, don’t judge right away, maybe, it’s the mindset that needed adjusting, maybe, it was because you didn’t allow it enough time to sink, or the sweetness hadn’t set in yet, allow time, to slowly make it into aromatic, give one another one more chance, to NOT leave any regrets in your own lives!

And so, back when we were younger, we are rash, that has more to do with our age, but, as we’d gotten older, we’d become more settled, and, what went wrong between us, neither one of us can really recall, because it WAS really unimportant, and that, is when we can pick up, right where we left off, before we got into that HUGE disagreement, and that, is the luckier of the cases, because sometimes, once you’d had a disagreement, that was IT, you don’t EVER reconnect again, and, you’d lost a good friend, without yourselves knowing it.

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Filed under Friendships, Translated Work