And you’d dated how long before you were wed again? And he’d managed to keep this BAD habit from you all these years??? A Q&A, translated…
Q: Madam C who’d dated her husband for a long time before getting married, in order to stop her husband from gambling, she’d walked on eggshells.
After she was wed, she’d learned that her husband had taken out a loan of one million dollars because of his gambling debts, later on, the amount was paid up by her mother-in-law, and, no one else in her husband’s house, and she didn’t even know about it. Five years after they’d been married, the husband had another one million dollars’ worth of gambling debts, he’d blamed it on how they’d fight a lot, that it’d caused him to be in a bad mood, that, was why he’d gambled; and used the excuse of how he’d handed over his pays to her, to have her pay for his debts. C had paid the money up for him, and since, she’d taken on the managing of his wages, along with the insurances payments too.
In the three years’ time, the husband promised he was not gambling again, but he didn’t have any sense of using less than he’d spent, C kept telling him that they don’t have that much money in the bank accounts, and he just ranted on how he needed a new set of wheels, said that if they didn’t have enough in savings, to take out a loan, C, who’d been managing their finances felt beaten, didn’t know what she should do.
A My Advice
It would be hard, to cure a gambling habit, to tell the truth, if your husband hadn’t gambled in three years, it’s something worth celebrating, but that bug that’s been suppressed too long is now, coming back out, and it’d worried the wife next to him. C told her husband, that if he’d gambled again, then, she will tell her mother-in-law, and that she would not pay a cent of his debts for him, and would certainly divorce him. But I believe, that her threats are huffle and puff, and plus, if it really got to the point of divorce, with three kids, C would surely have a ton of challenges coming her way.
After the harsh words were spoken, it’s probably C, taking a stand too, and, it is right, for her to stand strong behind her beliefs, but, she must also show some cares and concerns for her husband too. and on top of that, because her husband has property under his name, C can ask him to transfer the deeds to under her name, and asked for the separation of both their assets, and ask assistance from certified accountant and attorneys too.
Of course, I hope that they don’t get to that, but, you must prepare for the worst, if the marriage ended up as such, at least, C and her kids would have some form of security.
It is sound, to have money set aside, especially when the husband has this bad a habit, and, even IF he promises not to gamble again, but, based off of his long track records, there’s really no need to trust the man, and this would NOT be due to transference either.