Tag Archives: Impositions

Because You Don’t Want to Die Alone…

Because you don’t want to die alone, seeing how, nobody WANTS to be alone, when they’re, still alive, why would anybody want to die, all alone on her/his own?  Because you don’t want to die alone, you’d started, imposing your imminent death onto someone you knew from long ago, and that person, was the only one, that you’d known, who’d, come to, your beck and call.

And because s/he allows you to control her/him like that, you’d, started taking advantage of the fact of how s/he couldn’t, turn you down or away.  Unbeknownst, you’d, started, using manipulative ways, to control the other person.  Because you don’t want to die alone, but, you know what, EVERYBODY dies alone, nobody (not even G-O-D) can help you through the passage from life TO death!

Because you don’t want to die alone, such, a selfish motive, still, you’d, used it, as a VALID excuse, a form of, rationalization, of how and why people, should treat you kind, because you’re dying, therefore, you DESERVED to be shown, some extra kindness, right???  WRONG!!!

Because you don’t want to die alone, well, when I die, I’d much rather be, alone, on my own, and, someone will find me, a little while, AFTER I’m dead and gone, and follow everything I would’ve, specified, in my will, to handle MY final affairs…

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Filed under Abuse, Abuser/Enabler Interaction Style, Bad Behaviors, Codependence, Excuses, Letting Go, Life, On Death & Dying

Holding Her Fractured World Together, with Her Tiny Hands

Holding her fractured world together, with her tiny hands, although she wasn’t the one who broke it, but, it’d become, her responsibility to hold the world that is fractured, with her tiny hands.

Holding her fractured world together, with her tiny hands, she doesn’t know what she was doing, as the adults in her life, just handed her, a fractured world to hold onto.  Holding her fractured world together, with her tiny hands, and, as she grew, the fractured pieces of that world got big too, and, soon, they’d become, too heavy for her.

But, because she’d once promised someone, that that, is what she’ll do, she’d still kept doing it, until, she’d had her own child, and, gave the fractured world that was given to her, to her own offspring too.

Holding her fractured world together, with her tiny hands, she felt the broken shards, cutting into her skin, she saw herself, bleed, and yet, she didn’t, and couldn’t let go, because that, was a promise, she intended to keep, even IF it meant losing her own life…

Holding her fractured world together, with her tiny hands, but, how can she, she can barely stand up right, and yet, so much burdens were, placed upon her two tiny shoulders, whether or not she likes it, and, although she felt that it was, an imposition, what, can she do???

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Filed under Bad Parenting Behaviors, Cost of Living, Family Matters, Innocence Lost, Life, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Scapegoating, Socialization, Values

Stop “Helping” the Younger Generations

From the Front Page Sections, translated…

The younger generations, faced with low salaries and high employment rates, and so, the older generations always commented, “We must help the younger generations fulfill their dreams”, “We must build a stage, for the younger generations to shine on”, “We need to help the younger generations, gain a world view”………

Both the private AND the public agencies had poured a TON of resources into “helping the younger generations”, but, the younger generations are still, dissatisfied with life, and, the digits of the wages, of the employment rates, is still red, so, WHAT is the problem?

There are a ton of problems, that, is what I know for certain.  When we’re “helping” the younger generations, we’d often forced our own values systems onto them.  So, in helping the younger generations, we’re actually, trying to TURN them into us.

I too once, “helped” the younger generations in this way too, but, they’d not taken my assistance graciously.  No matter how noble my cause was, it just didn’t get the desired results.  I’d introspected again, realized, that the primary reason was that the values of the younger generations, had become too different, compared to the older generations who are in control of the bigger enterprises right now.

The value systems those from the fifties or sixties had “worshipped”, had caused Taiwan to become prosperous, sure.  And so, we naturally believed, that the younger generations must carry the torches of this excellent tradition, and keep working hard.  We’d all heard sentences like this, “Back then, so-and-so had traveled around a world, with a 007 briefcase, and, all you want is to get satisfied with the little things in life…”, and the purpose of statements such as this one is to pass on the torch, but the results of it is that these lines would usually receive the trash talks online.

Take for instance, the values of “being active in pursuit”, the two generations have people who are active in pursuit, it’s just, that they’d taken different directions to this pursuit, and used different ways to achieve it.  We believe, that being active in sales is making a hundred calls a day, but, the younger generations may only be willing to make just ten calls on their own.  Although they still worked hard, but they’d wanted a life of their own, after work hours.

Seeing the younger generations behaved like so, the classical reaction of the middle generations is, “ahhhhhhhhhh, these young ones today…”

After the start of that, then, the middle generation would lecture about how from when they were younger, they’d taken up the active approach to whatever, and that we should help the younger generations do this or that now.  But, the prerequisite of those “helpful behaviors” is” I help you, but you MUST follow my systems of value!  You must “get yourselves together”, and make those hundred calls a day!

But, the middle generations may not have thought about this, making a hundred calls a day, in those days where the fax machines still worked is okay, but, in this mobile networking current day, the system had become, outdated.  And, the economic atmosphere was natural back then, and, at this day and age, it’d become, a waste of time.

The differences in politics, in economy, as well as the technological advances, can and will create different behaviors.  Yesterday, the mindset we’d carried when we were younger, can no longer be duplicated in today’s world.  Can the older generation simply, just accept that: the younger generations don’t care that much about GDP?  Nor do they carry the beliefs, of, working hard, and it will, pay off?

However, it doesn’t mean, that the younger generations aren’t ambitious, when they’d come across things that matched up with the systems of values, they are, even MORE active, than the older generations.  They would take nothing more than a suitcase, trek across the globe, but not to get the sales slips in the States, but instead, to enter into International competitions on Designs, or to volunteer, in countries such as Tanzania.

And, the older generations who are worrywarts started worrying, “If all members of the younger generations are like this, what, will happen, to Taiwan?”, and, at the CORE of this worry is: Taiwan is no longer developing in the direction we expected or wanted it to anymore.

But, isn’t it the handing off the batons from one generation to the next?  Allowing each and every generation to take its own roads!  The younger generations are just like us, seeking out success, and bliss too.  It’s just, that they hold a differences in value in how success, and bliss is defined, compared to us.  We’d dealt already, and now, it’s their turns.  When we’re dealing, perhaps, the last generations are also, clenching, and grinding their teeth.  Just like how those die thrown by the younger generations right now, we don’t necessarily approve of.

Naturally, we should help them out, but, not wanting, or hoping, that they turn into us, but hoping, that they become the best themselves they can possibly be.

And so, I’d silently, changed the way I offered assistance to the younger generations.  Now, I’d helped them see ALL of their possibilities, then, make their decisions by themselves.  Accepting, that they’re using the attitudes or ways we don’t see fitting, to try on the lives that we don’t necessarily approve of.  And, after their trials, they may feel painful, or, they may have gained the sweet fruits of labor.  And who knows, maybe, they’ll come find us, and share their life experiences with us, or maybe even, they’d all, forgotten about us.  But, all of this, were once the rights we were endowed, and what is rightfully theirs right now.  And, unless, we can show complete respect toward these rights, otherwise, let’s just now, offer ANY assistance, to the younger generations then!

This, is from someone in the “older generations”, like in his fifties, maybe?  And, this writer made the important point of how every generation has different things they are carrying, so, do NOT force your GOD damn OLD-SCHOOL values onto your younger generation, even IF it’s with the BEST of intentions, because you don’t want them to travel so many wrong roads as you’d done in life, but hey, IF you don’t allow your young to make their own mistakes, how the HELL are they supposed to learn from their own life experiences, and learn the important lessons, from making mistakes you once had???

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Filed under Awareness, Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Issues of the Society, Lessons, Letting Go, Life, Observations, Socialization, Values, Wake Up Calls