Tag Archives: Fairytales

The Legend of the White Snake

Based off of a story from a very long time ago, translated…

The green snake was crying her eyes out, the man, lying, unconscious on the ground.  A gentle breeze came by, at the base of the Lei-Feng Tower, the white snake lost ITS thousand years’ worth of concentration.  In the small village in this hot summer season, in the front yard, the boy and the girl, both sweating like crazy, saying their lines, as they’d rehearsed the skit of the Summer’s Day.  Turning on the fans, they’d gone to check, to see if the earthworms underneath the metal pot, had they both, passed out because of the heat?

And, this, is still child’s play, and, they’re re-enacting a scene for the fairytales, learning to socialize in their genders.

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Filed under Gender Roles, Issues on Gender, Observations, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Relationship, Socialization, The Doll Corner, Translated Work

Given Up Her Voice

voice, as that, was the LAST thing he’d heard, before HE passed out, C-O-L-D!!!  And so, that, was how Little Mermaid, got PASSED over, by her supposedly true love.

And, the MORAL of the story is??? (yeah, there is still O-N-E!!!), don’t give anything that belonged to you away, because you don’t know when you just might want it back again, and, if you’d given it away, how the HELL you ever going to get it back?  Exactly.

Given up her voice, she underestimated the importance of her voice, and, when time came she needed it, she couldn’t find it, because she’d given up on it, what makes you think, that something you’d given UP is something that will be VITAL to your lives?  Of course N-O-T, because NOBODY can FORESEE the future, unless you know yourselves well.










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You Must Live Happily Ever After…

This, I guess, would be the Queens’ wish for her daughters, perhaps???  So, let’s begin, shall we???

Snow White’s birth mother, before she died…

Snow, you MUST live happily ever after, and NOT leave your own child, the way I must leave you, you mustn’t fall ill as I’d done, and leave your own daughter all alone in this world, with NO love at all.  You must live happily ever after, and marry that Prince Charming that woke you up out of that coma!!!  You must live happily ever after, and enjoy the life I was meant to have, but never got the chance of living out, child.

And now comes Beauty & the Beast…

You must live happily ever after, Belle, because you’d chosen to give yourself to the B-E-A-S-T, so your father would be saved, even though you felt NOTHING toward the beast, love will grow, I promise you, just give him time.

You must live happily ever after, for your father’s sake, because if he knew how unhappy you were, being kept captive by the Beast, he would’ve beaten himself up over letting you take his place.  So, for your father’s sakes, and your dead mother’s too, you MUST live happily ever after, and know, that you will NEVER get to bury your own father after he’d gone, because you’d still be “doing time”, for his sins, hunting on the Beast’s properties.

And, here’s that COMATOSE princess…

You must live happily ever after, even AS a vegetable, because you will NEVER be awakened again, NOT by Philip (that’s the name of the prince, right???), like you’d wished to, because he got DEVOURED by the dragon that was H-I-R-E-D (don’t know by whom!!!), to keep you guarded and safe, and, nobody will EVER dare venture anywhere N-E-A-R your bed after that.

You must live happily ever after, even IF nobody ever comes to wake you back up, after a million years of slumber, and, because you’re under that spell (by that last fairy godmother???), you will be FROZEN by time, and, your kinfolk, will fall asleep, alongside you, and, because you never got waken up again, neither will they.  Look at it this way, at least, you will ALWAYS BE beside your parents, the king AND the queen, sleeping in a COMA in the same building, that way, none of you will EVER feel lonely.
And, Rapunzel, who ACCIDENTALLY (yeah right!!!) cut her hair off, well, look at it this way, you’re still HIGH up, above everything else (it’s got a great view, you must admit!!!), and, nobody will EVER be able to climb to the HEIGHTS of your windows, and, you have EVERYTHING you’ll EVER need, inside that small confine of your tower, so, you got NOTHING to worry about.

You MUST live happily ever after, and have the life that I’d wanted for myself, but never had the chance of living out, because I met up with your father, darling daughter.  You must live out the rest of your lives in my wildest fantasies, and, you MUST live the life that I had wanted for myself, because you are my baby, and, I am your mother, and, you MUST help me accomplish all the dreams I’d dreamed up, but never had the chance of achieving, for whatever reasons there may be.

And that, would be exactly H-O-W, a happily ever after became so FUCKING (oopsy!!!) heavy on the shoulders of ALL those aforementioned “princesses” out there.


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Every Kingdom Needs a Tragic Character

From your “Once upon a time” fairytales, to the modern day monarchies out there…

Every kingdom needs a tragic character, like in those stories, such as Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Little Mermaid, Little Red Riding Hood, even Beauty & the Beast too.

And, this can be found, in modern day world still, like the tragic death of Princess Di from a very long time ago, leading to the BIRTH of the FUTURE king of England, who will BE ruling, after the current Prince William.

And, because the PUBLIC needs to see that they (the people from the higher ends???) are JUST like us, when they were STRUCK hard with tragedies in their lives, people have the tendency, to put that MAGNIFYING glass to observe the daily goings-on of those in high-up places.

Every kingdom needs a tragic character, whether it be Little Red, getting swallowed WHOLE by the Big Bad Wolf, Sleeping Beauty, getting PRICKED by that spinning jenny, and falling into a STATE of comatose, or Belle, going in her father’s place, to be “sacrificed” to the Beast, or even, the Little Mermaid, giving UP her life in the end, for the sake of her Prince Charming.

It’s those tragic characters in those stories, along with in reality, that make those fairytales so popular, after all, we need to know, that we are NOT the only ones who are suffering through our lives, and, those stories radiate of hopes of a better life, after all our hardships, don’t they???  They sure DO!!!

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How Many Toads Would YOU Kiss?

How many toads would you kiss, to find that one PRINCE charming?  Are you willing to BET your lives and the rest of your youths to boot too, that you will BE able to find that toad that WILL eventually turn into a P-R-I-N-C-E, and ride you OFF into the sunset on his white stallion?

How many toads would you kiss???  Me?  My “number” would be Z-E-R-O, because why bother, even IF that toad that I kiss (if I’m lucky enough, which I KNOW that I’m NOT!!!) gets turned INTO a prince, who’s to say, that he’s not going to make ME into Cinderella, and who’s to say, that his NOT going to IMPREGNATE me with his FUCKING tadpoles, and I end up being his “baby machine”?

How many toads would you kiss???  That’s still Z-I-L-C-H, because I’m NOT stupid, I’m still YOUNG (compared to a LOT of you out there, that is!!!), and I’m still NOWHERE N-E-A-R the “neighborhood” of being N-A-I-V-E, so, NO kissing them yucky, slimy, gross T-O-A-D-S for the Queen, besides, I AM already a Q-U-E-E-N, and so, why the HECK would I want to be “downgraded” into a “princess”?  Oh yeah, I wouldn’t!!!

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Hiding Behind Her Red Cloak

That, was Granny Red’s purpose, of giving Little Red the red cloak, without realizing, that Little would become too comfortable, hiding behind it, and so, one day, Granny Red decided that it’s time, to WEAN Little Red, because the world is horrible, and, it was simply too hard, for her to protect her granddaughter.

Hiding behind her red cloak, Little Red had done, since she was given the cloak, she’d been hugging on to the red cloak, like it was a protective blanket, she’d even named it “blankie”, and, after Little Red got older, she realized, that she could NOT drag her Red Cloak everywhere the way that Linus (from the Peanuts Gallery???) does.

Hiding behind her red cloak, she won’t be able to do, NOT since that night in the Woods, the Big Bad Wolf RIPPED off her red cloak, leaving her, ALL exposed and unprotected, and, as she lay dying in the forest, things flashed across her mind, and, she NEVER arrived AT Granny Red’s house again.

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Life on Land Isn’t as Good as I Thought It’d Be, The Little Mermaid is Having Some “Hindsight” Troubles Now

Yeah, once you’d become a part of something, something you weren’t a part of, you realized, hey, it isn’t that good, from the inside, looking O-U-T, but, back when you were on the outside looking IN, it looked amazing, and WHY would that be?  It’s still ALL due to the wonderful thing (yeah, another SARCASTIC remark!!!) called H-I-N-D-S-I-G-H-T!!!
Life on land isn’t as good as I thought it would be, Little Mermaid, after she was “granted” her pair of legs, slowly started to realize.  I’m away from my family who LOVED me unconditionally, and, why did I give that up?  Oh yeah, for L-O-V-E, and, I’m still UNSURE of myself (B/c it IS still TRANSFERENCE, hello, hello, hello???), and so, I’m questioning P.C.’s (Prince Charming???) loyalty to me, after all, he had been around the BLOCK, and I hadn’t even begun DATING back in the oceans yet, my father had keep me too tight on that leash.

And so, the Little Mermaid sits by the tall, tall edifice window each and every night, looking OUT at the vast ocean, wondering IF she’d made the right decision, in coming to SHORE, and, she will ALWAYS BE in doubt of her choice, because she followed her feelings, when she decided that she wanted to become human…

Moral of the story???  NEVER let feelings RULE your decision, like that former M**** F***ER told me, “FOLLOW YOUR HEAR, RUN IT OVER YOUR HEAD THREE TIMES!!!”, and yet, he still didn’t LISTEN to himself, are you FUCKING kidding me here???

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The Fragility of Fairytales

Let’s see, shall we???

Thumbelina’s fairy prince dude was EATEN by that little bird that the little boy set free awhile back on this space of mine, which means, that Thumbelina still doesn’t get HER fairy wings.

And, Little Mermaid?  We already K-N-O-W, what became of that once-immortal half human half FISH being already, she became bubbles on the surface of the sea.

And, Snow was put to sleep, well, she NEVER actually got OUT of her coma, waiting for HER LOSER to come give her HER “true love’s kiss”.  The Beauty, she still ended up with a B-E-A-S-T, except that he is NOT in the form of a ferocious animal, oh no, he is actually an UPRIGHT man.

And Pinocchio was turned into a PIECE of W-O-O-D that his “father” carved him out of, because of ALL the lies he’d told, seeing how susceptible he was, to peer pressure, he wanted to be accepted by other normal kids and all.

So, fairytales are quite fragile, and this time, Tinkerbelle got her way, because that arrow from Captain Hook SHOT STRAIGHT into Wendy’s heart…

Oh, and after Cinderella got KNOCKED UP by that Prince of hers, well, she gained weight like C-R-A-Z-Y and ended up, CRACKING both the heels of HER glass slippers, and, after Cindy had lost HER good looks, well, the Prince simply “tossed” her back where he found her, inside her stepmother’s home.

And, Sleeping Beauty’s fate is similar to Snow’s, except that she did NOT have the Seven Dwarfs like Snow, to give HER a “proper burial”, which is really very B-A-D…

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Be My Princess

Who, in this “room” wants to be a PRINCESS, waiting UP in that ivory tower, protected by those fire-breathing dragons (which makes great pets by the way…), asleep, waiting for THEIR true love’s K-I-S-S (and frankly, I would still RATHER kiss my D-O-G-S, and, they still have DOGGY BREATH too!!!).

Be my princess, because I want to be your Prince Charming, to come to your rescue.  Be my princess, let me feel like a REAL man, and, I will take out the GARBAGE (sure you will!!!) each and every night, for the rest of our lives on earth (just SHOOT me dead, RIGHT now!!!).

Be my princess, and carry my babies for me, and, after you’d gained over 500 pounds, I will leave you hanging out on that clothes line out back.  Be my princess, and, fulfill the desires of my EGO (still talkin’ ‘bout PRIDE here, ‘k???), and, because my coat of armor had become rusty somewhat over the years, I will also need that shined, and, who to do it but you, my darling… and that, would be how, ALL you freakin’ princesses out there still dreamy-eyed, end up as the M-A-I-D-S, as for me, I’m NOT hiring (for anything, including M-A-I-D-S, mechanics, lawn mowers, electricians, or whatever HELL else you can possibly think of…).

So, the next time you hear, “be my princess”, what are you going to do?  EMPLOY that D.A.R.E RULE: JUST SAY NO!!!  Otherwise, you will be so freakin’ sorry that you ladies got PULLED OUT of your mother’s VAGINAS (yeah, still using THAT word too, okay???)

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Once a Princess, ALWAYS a Princess

The L-A-W of once AND always still “fits”, just like Cindy’s glass slippers…

Once a princess, always a princess, and, ALL you princesses out there are still in a STEADY C-O-M-A-T-O-S-E, and, your “vital signs” are stable, but, there’s simply NO brain activity, and yet, you’re just “kept alive” by that machine that goes “beep, beep, beep”!!!

Once a princess, always a princess, because you can’t TEACH an “old dog” new tricks, unless you ARE a dog.  Once a princess, always a princess because those princesses are still STUCK in the mindset of “oh my god, that dragon guards my high IVORY tower, I got NO way of getting myself D-O-W-N!!!”, and so, those “princesses” will stay in THEIR separate C-O-M-A-S, and, even if a “true love’s kiss” (yeah right!!!) can’t wake those ladies UP.

Once a princess, always a princess, and, you guys have to know, that when you marry someone with the Princess Syndrome, you will become the M-A-I-D, and that glass slipper, well, it does NOT fit your separate HUGE more than size 9 (b/c that’s the smallest for guys, right???) feet, and, the heels on that glass slipper CRACKED, as glass is NOT a sturdy enough material to carry those over TWO-HUNDRED pounds of weight that you’d managed to “put on”, so, congratulations, on your S-E-P-A-R-A-T-E marriages, and, remember, you MUST serve all of your princesses or else, they will FIRE you from their ivory towers by THROWING you O-F-F!!!

False promises, out of the LIPS of a LOSER still…

Making you my queen, I promise to do, after all, it’s NOT every day that I get to FUCK a sexual, hot, arousing woman like you.  Making you my queen, after you’d allowed me to take away YOUR virginity, and now, the decision will be yours: your virginity for the “crown”, or, you can KEEP your virginity, and, be a NOBODY.

Making you my queen, because I love you right now, and, I focus on what my DICK tells me to do, right this moment, and, it’s telling me that I need to FUCK you.  Making you my queen, with a complete and total disregard of your feelings into my considerations, because I’m just SELFISH like that, and, I had never been told “no” by anybody, including my own parents.

Making you my queen, I’d love nothing LESS, but, will you be my queen?  I mean, why not?  Look at me, I am a hot man, that every single woman dreams of having a “donation” from, so, why not you?  Making you my queen, I will eventually, because I will always get what I want, and, I don’t care if I have to find a way to eliminate the man you’re currently in a relationship, because whatever I want, I G-E-T, because that, is the way I was raised!!!

Making you my queen, and I will be your king, and, I omitted the fact that a king is able to take up with a LOT of other women, because it IS accustomed, that the king has his separate sets of C-O-N-C-U-B-I-N-E-S, and, when I’m making you my queen, I won’t tell you everything there is to K-N-O-W about me, because I’m an “omitter”, but NO liar still…

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