Tag Archives: empathy

Cussing His Cancer Friend Out, It’s Sparked the Will to Live in Him

Helping someone who’s in the same predicament out, translated…

After my eldest uncle died of stomach cancer, I feared that there’s the inherited genes, I’d gone to the hospital for a check up, and, I was in the third stage of stomach cancer.  I’d thought, that after the surgeries, I will be fine, but, I’d started, retaining water, so I’d had to have a bag connected to my bladder at all times, and I’d become, a “backpacker” ever since, and, the will to live had, slipped away from me, little, by little, I’d really wanted to, just DIE.

Because I’m a Christian, other than having my faith to help carry me through, I’d relied on other members of my congregation, as well as my wife, to help me through, it’d made me realize, just how much luckier I am, compared to some of those who fell ill.  After I’d realized just how lucky I truly am, I’d decided, to turn what I’d weathered through thus far, into something greater, I’d gone to volunteer at the hospital, helped others to regain their health back again, sometimes, I’d gone to volunteer during the mornings, and, gone through my chemo treatments in the afternoons, and, even though, my body felt awful, I’d never complained, my coworker said, that I was working really hard.

Being a volunteer is very meaningful, you can share what you went through, with those who are still, fighting hard, sharing with them, let them know, “if I can, so can you.”  One time, I’d met a person who’s ill, he’d lost his will to live, and kept hollering nonstop how he’d wanted to die, I’d gotten angry, grilled him, “You think that you can give up, at any time you wish?  That you can lose your life at anytime you want to?”

Life, is all about, battling, ‘til that final drop of blood drips from your body, then, winning and losing, is decided, if you want to win, then, you need to keep a healthy mind and body, through exercising, to keep the cancer from coming back.  After that patient who’s diagnosed with cancer had heard me, he was originally, in a state of NOT eating ANYTHING, that day, he’d had a hearty meal, and, made the decisions, to live out his life fully, however long it may be, and that, was the biggest gain for volunteering for me.

Knowing that your stories can help someone out, to help the person have a brand new perspective, it’s a wonderful thing, isn’t it?  And that, just shows, how easily you can affect someone, to help change a life, and, this person didn’t even make ANY monetary donations too, imagine THAT!

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Filed under Attitude, Healing Process, Helping Behaviors, Life, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Wake Up Calls

My Son’s Sweeping Duties at Clean Time at School, the Restrooms, on Education of Children

Translated…

My fifth grade son, this semester, was assigned to the restrooms for his cleaning duties at school.

That day when I picked him up for school, the moment he’d gotten into the car, he’s mysteriously told me, “Mom, guess what important duties I have from my class today?”

I answered, “I can’t know, just give me the answer already.”

He’d excitedly stated, “I’m the cleaning official of my class, responsible for cleaning up the toilets.”

I’d asked him, “Did your teacher assign this duty to you?”, he’d replied, “No, I’d put myself up for it.”

I’d taken the advantage and asked him, “How, did you think about cleaning the toilets?”

“Because as I was younger in the school, the restrooms are so dirty, causing me to be afraid to go to the toilets in school, so I could only hold it in, and so, I’d thought, if one day, my class was assigned to clean the toilets, I am going to clean it up so, so no other student feel like I had.  The teacher told me, that grades aren’t everything, that I must be a student with good characters.”

Then, I’d heard my son told me on and on, “I’d stood at the entry of the bathrooms, reminding the students, to keep the bathrooms tidy, if someone disobeys the rules, I’d tell the teacher too.”

On the day of the parent-teacher conference, my son had even invited me, to “share” his “glory”, he didn’t let anybody down, the instructor also kept commending him on how mature and well-behaved he was.  At the end of the semester, my son received the award for “the Star of Moral Standards”.

In the age where everybody is pursuing high grades, actually, education of character is even MORE important.

So, this child had the empathy, because he once had the experiences of unable to use the toilets at his school because of how unclean it was, now that it’s his turn to help clean up the toilets, he didn’t want anybody to go through what he did as he was younger, and, this, is an amazing thing, that this fifth grade boy can use empathy, to keep up with the responsibilities of his cleaning duties.

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Filed under Education, Lessons, Observations, Socialization, Values

The Multiple Tastes of Life, the Stone Soup Project’s Plans to Keep the Homeless Fed

Story of hope here, translated…

Last year, the volunteer for the raw materials at the March 18th student movement, Wu, saw how the donated food got dumped out because it couldn’t be finished.  There were homeless people who’d come forth and asked, “if he could have some of the foods?”, and someone had turned the man away, using, “the food is for the students”, it’d made Wu empathic.

One evening, the resources group received a casing of steamy buns, Wu’s coworkers from Fair Trade Organization, Chu, Chang were able to sneak the buns to Longshan Temple.  That, was their very first encounter with homeless people, and, their views of the homeless were altered completely.

Wu said, that day at Longshan Temple, he’d met an older man, who’d handed out the steamed buns for them, at eight or nine in the evenings, as the homeless had returned home to sleep after working their odds and ends, the older man kindly placed the buns next to those who were already asleep, and it didn’t play out like how they thought it would, people fighting over the food items handed out.

After being in long-term contact with the homeless, they’d understood, that the homeless don’t just lay around all day, and do nothing, seventy percent of the homeless actually have jobs, and they’d gone out, early in the morn, to work, and, it may be working at the construction sites, or, holding up signs by the side of the roads.

Chu wanted to do something for these individuals, so, she’d called up Wu, Chang, plus her coworkers, “Uncle”, “Baby”, and became the team of “the Tastes of Life”.  The five youths averaging not yet 30, last July, put forth the “Stone Soup Project”, asked the online community to donate the foods that they can’t manage to finish, and the team found a chef, to cook the hot meals, so the homeless won’t go hungry.

“The Stone Soup Project” had gotten a ton of supports, and, there were local shops in Wanhua that had supplied the food sources, and they’d held over eight Stone Soup Food Sharing Activities.  Not only were they trying to get the food items donated, they are also looking for more volunteers to help out, so, more people can get in touch with the homeless population.

Chu said, a lot of people wouldn’t DARE stare straight into the eyes of the homeless or handicapped people on the streets, feared that it wouldn’t be polite, “turning their heads away, they were actually, refusing to deal with the issues”.  They’d hoped, that through sharing of the food, there would be more chances for people to have interactions with the people on the streets who were being ignored by the world, the next step they wished to take is toward the vendors on the streets, to get the public involved, to break the barriers, so people can understand, that even the smallest offerings can help take care of someone in need.

So, this, is how kindness starts small, and grows bigger and bigger, isn’t it?  The man first felt empathic over the situations he’d encountered, which initiated a response in him, to care, and, through helping, he got to know, that he was making a difference in the lives of those who are homeless, which then became the drive, for him, to keep doing what he was doing, and, he wanted to help others to get to understand the culture of the homeless, so they can be more aware like he himself had become too.

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Cause & Effect, Cost of Living, Helping Behaviors, Inspirational Tales, Interpersonal Relations, News Stories, Observations, Perspectives, Social Awareness, Social Issues, Stories of Hope, Story-Telling, White Picket Fence

“Rather than Shopping”, the Time is Better Spent, Helping Children From Less Fortunate Backgrounds Learn English, a Woman Who’s a Flight Attendant Chose to Help Children from Less Fortunate Backgrounds with Their Studies in English

Taking her time, to help children, from the Newspapers, translated…

“I’d much rather spend my time volunteering than shopping!”, at the start of the year, the Hsinbei City Libraries started the English reading programs, a passionate flight attendant who’s a mother, Chien, was the very first to sign up to help out, with two children of her own, she’d transferred the love she has for her kids to other child, set up a one-on-one tutoring session, free of charge, to help kids learn English better, just hoped, that the kids won’t get labeled for not performing well enough in school.

Started at age nineteen, Chien worked as a flight attendant, said that she’d traveled around the world, and had tons of fun, that although her youngest son was still in kindergarten, she’d contemplated on retiring, hoped, that she could start living her semi-retirement life, she’d scheduled less shifts, with an increase in her vacation time, last year, by a chance encounter, she’d found the volunteers online, and joined, became the very first English language helper in the city of Hsinbei.

A sixth grade boy, Cho, couldn’t manage to keep up with the levels of his other classmates, and, because his family economics couldn’t allow him, so, after he’d gone to middle school, before the challenges presented themselves to him, he was already, half given up, his grandmother worried about his school performances, right after the English camp was over, she’d run to the libraries, grabbed Chien’s arms and asked, “Can you help him out?”

“The grandmother believed that her grandson wanted to learn, just couldn’t find the directions”, Chien was moved by Grandma Cho’s serious attitude, and started her own tutoring in private, and started with the basics, free of charge, one on one with the child, and adjusted the curriculum, to help Cho the little boy get a first look at what he’ll be learning in school next semester, “hoped that he could excel right away in school, to find his self-confidence back again.”

When asked why she was willing to put so much more in her volunteering than the other moms, Chien said, volunteering made me realized how blessed I actually am, she’d found, that a lot of the kids from the less fortunate backgrounds who couldn’t afford tutors got labeled, “if we don’t help them lay down the foundations beforehand, then, in middle school or high school, they will, surely, fall behind, and, their lives would be denied.”  She’d recalled her own children, and, transferred the love she has for her own to the other kids too, she just couldn’t, let them all slide.

After she’d started volunteering, Chien often said, “rather than going shopping on the strip, I’d much rather volunteer at the libraries.”, it brings more joy, to help the kids.  She said, she knew a group of housewives who lived on easily, that other than taking care of their husbands and kids, they’d watched the soaps, and shopped, she hoped, that she could encourage this group of mothers to come out, to enter the field of volunteering alongside her too.

And so, this woman took the initiate to help out, because she saw that there was a need for her services, and, she did this so selflessly, without wanting, or asking for anything in return, because she has kids, and so, she can better understand what the kids are going through, and, she’s doing a wonderful thing here.

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Filed under Cause & Effect, Helping Behaviors, Life, Parenting/Parenthood, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Values

The Warm Bowl of Soup on a Freezing Wintry Night

Helping someone in need here, translated…

On a certain cold night, I’d gone to a shop close by, ordered a combo meal for $150 N.T.s, with ribs and rice, soup, and egg.

At which time, there was a boy who seemed handicapped, wearing a white baker’s uniform, he’d ordered a stewed meat rice that’s $30N.T.s, sat right next to me, he kept looking at what I’d ordered, seemed to not understand, how come my meal is so much better than his.

It was cold, he saw how warm I looked with my hot soup, he’d worked up a courage, to ask the owner for just some soup, but the owner of the shop wasn’t willing, stated that if he’d given it to him, then, everybody would want some too, and, who will buy the soup with the fish balls?

I watched from aside, thought that the owner lacked compassion, that the boy might be mentally retarded, and wouldn’t understand doing business, and wasn’t trying to scam the owner, and so, I’d told the owner, “Just give it to him, whatever I’m having, he’ll have too, I’ll pay for it”, the owner of the shop gave it to him.

It’s actually an amazing feeling, being able to help someone out, plus, maybe that boy was mentally retarded, he wouldn’t think as deep or as much, just wanted some warm soup and be fed.  With a little more compassion, seeing how the one you helped feel better, your heart will, also feel warm too.

So, a little empathy still goes a very long way here, because the person felt for the younger boy, and, wanted to help him out, and, he’d lent the boy a helping hand, and, he got pure joys out from knowing he’d helped made someone else’s life a little better.

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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Cost of Living, Helping Behaviors, Kindness Shown, Lending a Helping Hand, Life, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life

A Shop for the Families, So the Developmentally Slow Children Can Play without Being Hurried

From the Newspapers, translated…

“Don’t worry, you’re just a slower learner!”, the four-year-old, Kang, at age two, was diagnosed as having autistic symptoms, the parents poured out their hearts and souls in caring for this boy, other than his mother quitting her job, his father, Chen Kang quit his stable job last year too, he’d started a parent-child shop in the San-Chi District, with half the space in the shop set up as a play area, he said, “I wanted to give my son a safe place to make new friends, that, is the most important thing of all.”

At two years old, children should be learning to talk, but, back then, Kang could only practice making the noises with air, it’d made his father felt that something wasn’t right, he’d taken his son to ask around, in the end, the diagnosis of autism was given, he said, it took him an entire year to doubt, to know, then, to accept his son as autistic.

And Kang had also, consulted the gods, hoped, that the heavens could shine down on his child, so he could “become normal”.  He’d slowly understood, that his son is only a slow starter, so long as the condition is discovered early, through interactions, and rehabilitations, the child can still, soar high up to the skies.

Last year in November, Kang quit his designing job at the furniture shop, and after discussing with his wife, he’d spent nearly four million dollars, set up the Yun-Tien Cultural and Literary Center, and, the shop, in Kang’s insistence, half of the space was built, into a children’s area for the kids to play in.

And so, this father decided to do something, for his own son, he’d quit his job, and had, found the methods, to help his own son, by setting up this shop, where his son will be able to make friends, and play freely, and live as normal as he possibly can.

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Filed under Coping Mechanisms, Cost of Living, Helping Behaviors, Life, Perspectives, Properties of Life, Socialization

My Wife Who’s Way Too Nosy

On ordinary matter of every day living, translated…

On the weekends, we’d occasionally gone shopping at the wholesales mart, in the attires department, we’d seen the clothes that were tried on or flipped through in a huge pile of mess, at which time, my wife used her nosy spirit, walked toward the stand, and, started, folding the clothes, the pants, along with other things back up, and, stacked them up nicely.

“I folded the clothes very wonderfully, don’t I?  I part-timed at a clothing attire shop back then, and, I’m best at folding the clothes!”, my wife told me, with a gloat.

As we’d gone to the frozen sections, she’d started ordering the buns she’d found in the dumplings’ section, and the buns that were left at the seafood section too.  And, someone had stuffed an already weighed bag of seaweed and bean curd at the instant noodles section, and I saw my wife, with the bag of seaweed and bean curd in hand, walked toward the cooked section, and, handed it over to the worker.

Once, there were two children, horse playing around, and, managed, to knock over a glass of cooking oil, and the oil slowly, spread all over the ground, and the parents didn’t go and tell the custodians.  My wife saw this, she’d marched to the service counter, and told the customer service representative about it.

And, that’s not all, from time to time, when we’d gone out dining, when I was paying for the meals at the counter, I’d often seen her and my sons, wiping down the eating utensils, and, piling them up at the center of the tables, then, my wife would take out a piece of tissue, and, wiped the table down.

I’d often tell her, “why are you such a busybody?  People would mistake the mess as made by us, and, there are those at the shopping strips who are hired to do this, so long as we make ourselves into examples, not create troubles for them.”

“It’s because of people without the sense of cleanliness, that creates trouble, think about it, if your son or daughter works at a supermarket, would you misplace the items?  Would you leave the shirts and pants all over the places, messy?”  She does, have a point!

And so, whatever we do, we must also, consider others.

And so, the wife’s “nosiness” is actually her empathy, because she doesn’t want anybody to have to clean up the messes that someone else leaves behind, and it’s also because of her attitude, that’s taught her husband a lesson.

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Filed under Cause & Effect, Life, Observations, Socialization, Story-Telling, Values