Tag Archives: An Inheritance of Wisdom

Leaving One Last Play Behind

An example of how to set up, one’s own, final assets, regarding the divisions of inheritances, and one’s own, final care too!  Translated…

In the past, we were, coworkers, AND rivals too.  I’d, hated how she’d, talked trash about me in her conversations, but I couldn’t, help but feel in awe at how swiftly she’d, handled the matters at work, or how she was able to, realize something way before the rest of us had.  I’ll admit, I’m, a bit jealous of her.  After I’d, left my former place of work, I’d heard, that she’d, switched to working in another company too, and had even, gotten promoted to a manager.  Thanks to the internet, it’d, connected us again, and we’d, started, talking sporadically, about the things that are of, no important, matters.

Not long ago, she’d asked me out for coffee, out of curiosity, I’d, agreed.  The day we met up, she’d, lost a ton of weight, and, her eyes were, a whole lot, softer too.  She’d told me she was now, retired, I’d, prodded, “Would your boss let you go?  Wasn’t he the least bit afraid, that nobody will, fill your shoes?”, she’d smiled and told me, “he had to, because, which business owner wanted, to keep a cancer patient on the payroll?”, I felt that shock inside.  Turned out, she’s been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, the third stage.  She’d told her oncologist, that she won’t be going through the extensive treatment measures, only keeping her pain controlled, during this time period, she’d first shown gratitude toward her older brother and sister-in-law, to tell her only daughter that she loves her, that on the road of single parenthood, her daughter, was her one and only, biggest console; and lastly, she thought, of me, wanted to apologize to me, that from when we’d worked together, she’d always, talked trash because she’d, envied how perfect my family is, and how everybody in the office got along with me so well………..

I didn’t know what to say to her, and, all the encouragements, and words of console seemed, excess and unnecessary.  So I’d asked her, if she’d, set up her final affairs?  For instance, the most practical, transferring her assets, the properties and the cash too, I was so certain, that it was to dodge the inheritance taxes, she’d, totally have, already, transferred the money to her daughter’s accounts, but that was, not what, she’d done.  Other than giving partial of her assets to her daughter, she’d, donated some to charitable causes, and, saved some for herself, including the property she now, lives in.  I was so curious, as to why she’d, saved some for herself?  She’d told me she wasn’t, a stingy person, although she’s, dying, but how much longer will she be, around?  The doctor’s verdicts may not be, absolute, she’d hoped, that she could, walk her final mile in someplace familiar, her own, home, and, during this time, she would, need to, spend the money to care for her self, she’d, needed, to hire a nurse to take care of her, that she’d, needed, to take good care of herself in illness.  If she didn’t die, she’d not wanted to, rely on her daughter to help her live, although, the money her daughter has, were once, from her too, but she’d, transferred the money to her daughter’s name, and, it’s, no longer, owned by her.  She’d also told me, “I’d given my child so much, what’s a little inheritance tax on her part?”, it’d, made my heart shocked, such a different sort of parent, this was, the way, for a win-win.

As the shop was, about to close, we’d, asked the waiter to take a photo of us together, we’d said goodbye.  She’d told me, to not ask around about her then, she wouldn’t have any final rites, that tonight, was the last time we’ll, ever meet up.  She’d told me, “I want you, to remember me as right now!”

On the MRT, I’d, looked, at that photo of us, I’d, thought about what she’d said about her “saving a part of her own assets for herself”, I’d felt, that she was, a role model, for how all parents should, set up the inheritances to give to their young, she’d been, an, amazing competitor, whom I’d, learned, a whole lot from that’s for sure!

And so, this, was how well-thought-out this woman was, of planning her own final affairs, she’d, made sure that her daughter will be, taken care of, and, used the amount after she’d set aside for her own daughter’s sake, to donate to charity, and, saved another portion for herself for her own, final care, that way, she wouldn’t become a burden to her own young, and she’d, still, managed, to leave her daughter with something, as well as, help those in need too.

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Filed under Cost of Living, Decision-Making, Expectations, Lessons, Letting Go, Life, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, the Finality of Life, Values

My Father’s Wisdom of Knowing When to Hold ‘Em and When to Fold ‘Em

On parent-child interactions, what the child took away from the father’s wisdoms, passing down the legacy, an ideal, translated…

My father is an experienced, older generation farmer, he’s elderly now, immobilized these days, and had stopped working the fields for over a decade, but his wisdom and experience were my consultant, as a farmer.

Recently when I’d asked him, if I needed to irrigate the land as the rice was about to become ripe, he’d told me the story of “knowing when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em”, it was an enlightening lesson.

He said, that over two decades ago, there was a family, Cheng, his rice grains are already ripened and ready for harvest, and, the machines were sent into the fields.  The operator of the machinery told Cheng that it would be best to harvest when the weather got better, then, a week’s worth of rain followed, causing him unable to go out and harvest, and, the plants all got blown over, soaked in water, and started budding, the four months worth of hard work was lost overnight.

My father told me, actually, the rain was still manageable, he couldn’t started the harvesting.  Later on, a lot of the villagers used this tale as a lesson to teach their children, as soon as the grains are ready for harvest, start harvesting.  But, this still relies on the conditions, like awhile ago, when the weather forecast foretold of strong rains, this caused panic in the older generations of farmers, and so, they’d harvested before the grains are fully grown, and they couldn’t get high enough prices for them, and the rice that got made, were easily crushed, and it didn’t taste that great either, the farmers lost a lot.

My father told me, that the weather in June and July is unpredictable, so, we should know when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em, without any hesitation.  He said, “The grains from the first planting season would be mature from the center to the side of the field, the second season’s, from the side to the center, and, it would be no problem, for the grains to grow completely, so, so long as the husks are hard when you bite down, that means that in three to four days, they would be ready.”

When I stood in front of the first season’s planting, with the golden field before me, all the hardships we’d had for the past couple of months had been forgotten, and, all the hard work paid off, I was filled with a sense of achievement.

When I sat in the living room, discussing with how the harvest will e ready with my father, both our hearts were filled with joy, he rarely went out to the fields to check anymore, but, as he’d talked of the business of planting, you’d see his eyes light up, as if he was returned to his younger days, when he was still able-bodied and working in the fields.

I will carry forth my father’s spirit in planting, to keep watch over my family’s farm, this, is my responsibility as his son.  And, this, made me, really proud, to call myself a “farmer” too.

And so, the son is affected by the father’s attitude, and the father managed to instill the right kinds of values in the son, which the son will carry forth in other aspects of his own life, not just in planting the rice grains too, I’m sure.

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A Seed of Wisdom

I am, unusually, B-L-E-S-S-E-D, to be given a (just O-N-E!!!) seed of wisdom, and, I’d taken care of that hard-to-come-by seed, planted it into the ground, watched over it, gave it water, sunlight, along with fertilizers, to make sure that it becomes what it’s supposed to become…

A seed of wisdom, as I’d planted it, I didn’t know what it would turn out as?  A fruit tree that produced the sweetest, the juiciest fruit?  Or, one of those trees that gives shade, and home to a TON of critters in the forest?  All I knew, was that I needed to watch over this seed of wisdom, because I was the one, planting it, and so, I MUST take full responsibilities for it, when it is still a young sapling, but, as it grew bigger, and bigger, I shall take those “training wheels” off of it, allow it to grow whichever way it wants to.

A seed of wisdom, I hold it, in my hand, it’s the fifth generation now, as that first seed was planted, by my great, great, great, great, grandparent, and, they’d ALL plucked a seed from the tree that’s been planted by the previous generation, and passed that down, and now, I’m going to pass this seed of wisdom, with EVERYTHING I’d learned, from ALL the previous generations, to my own…………









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Filed under A Cycle of Kindness, Expectations, Karma, Parenting/Parenthood, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Writing