Category Archives: Behavior Modifications

The Biggest Fear of the Elderly, Tripping & Falling Down, Use Exercise, as Well as Looking After Coronary Health to Resolve the Problem

Watch out!!!  From the Front Page Sections, translated…

The former whip of the KMT, Bo-Hsiung Wu accidentally broke his ribs from a fall, causing him to need emergency surgery because the fluids accumulated in his lungs, it’d reminded those with an elderly person at home, to prevent tripping and falling down.

As Taiwan marched into the elderly population exceeding the younger, in order for the elders to live on healthy, with a good quality of life, the worst that could happens is tripping and falling down, it may break the bones, and cause immobility.  Because once the ability to move is lost, the elderly would become long-term bedridden, not only would this cause stresses on the families, a lot of the elderly also deteriorated quickly.

My own father is quick-tempered, he’d hurt his ankle from a car accident many years ago.  And, he’d thought, that he was an athlete when he was younger, so he didn’t pay any attention to the injury, in the end, he’d had to undergo surgery.

Before the screws on his joints healed back up, and because he couldn’t stay still, lying down, he’d walked around using his cane, visiting his friends.  And, one rainy day, he’d slipped, and had to have another surgery.  And this time, the doctor only managed to stable his legs from the outside, and, screwed the screw on outside his body.  After the screws were removed, he’d lost function in his ankle, and, his legs became uneven too.  And because he’d relied on his healthy leg long-term, it’d caused a grown inside the bones.  I his elderly years, maybe it was because of how his legs wasn’t strong enough to carry his body weight, he’d fallen from the stairs,  hurt his brains, and died.

We’re advocating that the elderly, to move around if you want to stay healthy, if you want a high quality of life, you must establish the habits of exercising regularly.  But, we must remind the elders, to NOT be too hurried, to take things easy.

And so, the elderly should prevent from tripping and falling, because, a LOT of complications would come after tripping and falling, not only physically, the broken bones, being in a cast, the immobility, etc., etc., etc., there’s also the mental state to consider, when the elders are injured, so, keep watch over your older adults, and, have them use a CANE, whether or NOT they want to, it’s for their own benefits!

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That Day, with My Back Turned, on the Bus

Translated…

I am without a motorcycle, so, no matter where I go, to class, or work, to shop, shopping for groceries, I’d taken the free bus that runs eight kilometers locally.  But, one day, everything that was familiar, became, kinda odd………

First, it was the driver’s look switched between shocked, pity, and showing concern, it’d flattered me so.  And, there’s the normally rowdy bus that’s gone silent all of a sudden.  For this time frame, and this bus, it’s, quite weird.  In the end, being young as I am, able-bodied too, was given a seat, by a student.

What the heck just happened?  I can’t understand it, until I saw my own reflections on the windows—with a backpack on my left, with a home computer on my right, with a suitcase in hand, plus, a huge bag of quilt………it’d made me, who had to move all my things out, looked like I’d just gotten KICKED out of my place of residence.

Maybe, in those passersby’s mind, my backside was like Tzi-Ching Chu’s “The Backside”, causing people to tear up.

Funny, how when you’d become aware of your surrounding environments that everything just made a difference, isn’t it???  like for this person, who was probably just moving her/his stuff from the dormitories, as the semester ended, looked like someone who’d become homeless in other people’s points of views, that, just shows, that interactions are still happening in the world, without verbal exchanges………

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Is the Child’s Oversensitivity a Behavior Problem?

So this, is what the parents have to cope with, with a way-too-sensitive child at home, huh???  Translated…

“Your daughter is so very quiet—have you ever considered, taking her to the doctors?”

“Jody is so easily hurt.  If she sees that other children were picked on, she’d cried too.  When she’d heard sad stories, she’d cry.  We don’t know what to do with her.”

“Everybody in the kindergarten is eager to participate in group activities, but, your son just refused.  Is he also this stubborn at home too?”

Do these lines sound familiar?  Of course, these words can get to you, as if, your kid’s the one with the problems, but, your child has a keen sense of observation, shows a lot of care and concerns toward others, and is very sensitive.  You knew real well, that if you heed these words, forced him to get socialized, the child would be in a whole lot of pain.  And, if you go with the flow of your child’s personality characteristics, s/he might be well-off.  And still, as the same words keep coming up, you’d started doubting, whether or not you’re fitting as a parent, and that you might be responsible, for your child, behaving the way s/he does.

How to Education Children Who are Too Sensitive?

You feared, that you may be doing things wrong, worried that no one can help you.  You might have already realized, that most of the parenting books all talked about “behavioral problems”, such as getting agitated easily, distracted, rough, attacking.  From this angle, there’s NOTHING wrong with your child.  There were NO mentions of the problems you’d encountered, eating problems, being too shy, nightmares, worries, and, strong emotional outburst, for no apparent reasons at all.  And, you couldn’t discipline your child using normal methods, even IF you’d just criticized her/him lightly, your child would have a complete meltdown.

The Words of Advice from the Experts:

When people tell you, that something IS wrong with your child, don’t believe them, and don’t LET your child believe them either.  Your child is UNIQUE, that, is not your fault.  Naturally, there would be room for improvement in parent-child interaction techniques, but, don’t ever believe that something IS wrong with you, or your offspring.

Based off of studies, fifteen to twenty percent of the children in the population are born naturally sensitive.  And, with this great number, it’s hardly “abnormal”.  Besides, in ALL the species that’s been studied, there are JUST as high records of individuals in the population that are this sensitive.  And, IF that, is the result of evolution, then, there MUST be a reason for it, we just can’t see it is all.

There are many evidence that suggests, that people who are highly sensitive are NOT necessarily shy, nor are they all neurotic OR anxious all the time, or even, depressed.  For some of the more sensitive members of the population, these emotional responses are caused by environmental stimuli, NOT inborn traits.

What, is a Heightened Level of Sensitivity?

People who have a heightened level of sensitivity are more aware of the details in their surrounding environment, and, before they acted, they’d think, thoroughly first before they took the actions.  Whether it be adults or children, those who are sensitive usually have a higher level of empathy, more intelligent, has strong instincts, with creativity, more careful, with a lot of conscience.

They understood better, the result of their own actions, and so, they’re less willing, to do the wrong things.  They couldn’t cope well with higher volumes of sounds, or an influx of information coming to them at any given time.  They would avoid these stimuli, which makes them appear shy or distant from others.  If they couldn’t avoid the circumstances of being under too many stimuli, then, they’d become “difficult to deal with”, or “way too sensitive”.

Although those who are deemed more sensitive pay attention to the details more, but, they may not have a better sense of sight, hearing, taste, or smell.  But, there are those with a better ability in one of their sensory organs.  The key point here, is that when their brains processed the information, they do it more thoroughly.  Not just their brains, those who are deemed more sensitive also have a stronger spinal reflex too.  Their immune systems are more active, they are prone to develop allergic reactions to things.  Which means, that their bodies are designed, to understand and observe this world even MORE thoroughly.

So, just because your kid cries a lot, or wouldn’t play in groups, PARENTS and TEACHERS, that still doesn’t mean that there IS something wrong with the kid, something IS wrong, with Y-O-U, stupid adult, who work so totally FUCKING (oopsy!!!) hard, to FIT all those little ones, inside just ONE square, but hey, some of us are rectangles, triangles, rhombi, circles, along with an ASSORTMENT of shapes AND sizes, and, we still DON’T just FIT properly to the “norm” (whatever THAT is!!!), so STOP trying to FIT your young INTO certain boxes, and just love them for the way that they are, after all, they still did NOT ask to be BROUGHT to the “outside world”, you two ADULTS are the ones to have FUCKED, and, out still popped???  Oh yeah, those “pretty little MISTAKES” of yours, remember?  Uh, YEAH, and, D-U-H!!!

 

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Those Who Take the M.R.T. Continued Sliding on the Cell Phones, and, the Patrolling Police Were Reduced

The aftermath of the shooting awhile back, from the Front Page Sections, translated…

The murder cases of the random shooting that occurred on the MRT in Taipei, the crowd had returned to its usual rates since the shooting awhile ago, and, most of the passengers had already, put this tragedy behind them, and, the Hsinbei MRT station police force was also, reduced, from the originally 700 officers per day, to just one officer, watching the platforms, during the afternoon rush hours.

There were those passenger riding on the MRT who lowered their heads, to catch up on their sleep now, and, more are zoomed in on their cells, to play, and, most of the passengers sat quietly, watching the scene outside roll on by, to carry on in conversation, the tense atmosphere from before can no longer be felt.  The regular office worker, Gang-Yu Hsieh said, that he would NOT change his habits of sliding his cell phone while riding on the MRT, “there’s just no need, to be on high guards all the time.”

The eighth grader, from Jiang-Tsuei Middle School, Huang said, that the two weeks right after the random shooting, he was very scared, but after the police were sent, to patrol the MRT stations, he felt safer, and slowly, he no longer felt anxious.

Mr. Liu who saw the victims using their hands, to cover their wounds that day said, two weeks after the shooting, he’d made sure that his daughter rode the bus, later on, because there were police force, standing guard at the MRT stations, he’d allowed his daughter to ride on the MRT during the rush hours, but now, his worries are totally gone.

The twenty-two year-old college student who bore witness to someone getting murdered by Jie Cheng that day on the MRT still can’t wipe the images of the passengers, scattering out in a panic off of his mind, but she said, now, the passengers are no longer on heightened alert with one another, “those who are dozing off, are dozing off, those who are sliding on their cell phones, are sliding on their cells”, it’s like, the shooting had, never even happened at all.

The Taipei MRT offices estimated, that a month after the shooting rampage, the flow of “traffic” had dropped by 60,000 compared to the previous month, and now, it’d rose up to 194,000 per day, and, the events are no longer, affecting the operations of the Taipei MRT systems.

The sixth train where the shooting occurred is still parked in the garage in Tucheng, Hsinbei City, the officials planned to change the seats, and will see if there’s the need, to decide, if the train sections where the murders occurred should be placed back on the systems.

And so, this, is what happens AFTERWARDS, and, see how quickly people can toss the badness to the BACK of their minds?  And, until something like the shooting by Jie Cheng occurred again, will people start getting scared, and, shortly thereafter, the public, once again, toss all of that, to the BACK of their minds, that, is how SHORT the attention span of the public is…and, everything will, still, BLOW over, and, people will, eventually forget!

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The Day Before the Rampage

This, is still the CALM before the storms!!!

On the day before the rampage, the perpetrator (shooter???) went to school, attended her/his classes as s/he had always done, and kept to her/himself as s/he had done, for ever since s/he’d started going to school.

The day before the rampage, nobody noticed anything wrong with the shooter, because the shooter wears her/his mask well, and because of how well s/he covered her/himself up, nobody knew, until the next day they all came to school, and GOT shot!

The day before the rampage, you may feel that chill, because how calm things appeared to be, on the surface, while feeling, that something’s building up, you just don’t know WHAT it could be, because it still hasn’t happened Y-E-T.

The day before the rampage, everybody still went about their business, like they all did, the parents dropped their kids off at school, then, headed off to work, like ANY given workday, and, NONE of them still has a SINGLE clue, of what, was about to happen, the very next day…………

The day before the rampage, that boy who shot a TON of people, was still his antisocial self, and because he’d been antisocial ALL along, ever since he’d started school here, everybody took the day before the rampage as any regular school day.

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Because He’d Wanted a Day Off From Work, He’d Lied About His Son Having Passed Away

If this is the ONLY excuse you can come up with for NOT wanting to go to work, then, you are in BIG trouble here!!!  From the Front Page Sections, translated…

The manager of a restaurant, Hsiao, had only worked for four days and wanted to take a break, and so, he’d lied to his coworkers, that his son had an accident, and is now, hospitalized, the general manager of the restaurant even wired fifty thousand dollars to him, and his coworkers saw how he didn’t show up for work for a long time, and asked him how his son was, he’d replied, “He’s gone now”, the colleagues sent flowers to offer their condolences, the mother-in-law picked up the calls and the man’s lies busted; because Hsiao felt ashamed, he quit his job, and he was also found guilty for fraud and taken into custody for fifty-five days, and he could pay a $55,000N.T. fine, to not serve his time in jail.

The verdict stated, that the forty-four year old man, Hsiao, at the beginning of February, went to work as a manager of a restaurant, the fourth day since he’d started working, he’d asked for a leave of absence from the general manager of the restaurant, said that his wife told him, that his son was involved in a car wreck and is now, being resuscitated at the hospital, that he must be there, at the hospital too.

That same evening at around eleven, the general manager of where he worked texted him a message of concern, Hsiao had lied to the person then, that his son had subdural hematoma, and needed a surgery, that he will need to borrow $50,000N.T. for the procedures, the manager didn’t say a word, and had his secretary wired the amount to Hsiao’s bank account, and told him to look on the bright side, to not worry so much.

Several days later, Hsiao still didn’t show up for work, the female accountant texted her concerns to him, and transferred all the coworkers’ well wishes for his son, Hsiao replied, “My son died yesterday, after I’d handled his final affairs, I shall return to work.”

The female accountant along with his coworkers were shocked, thought that the son had died, and immediately told what had happened to Hsiao to their superiors.  The general manager told the female accountant, to call up his family, to offer their condolences, and asked about when they should send the flower rings and the floral baskets.  As Hsiao’s mother-in-law picked up the call, she felt that it was weird, and learned that Hsiao had told such a huge lie, and grilled him about it, and apologized to the restaurant he worked in profusely too.

Hsiao apologized to the general manager, and sent in his resignation, and spoke of an amount for settlement, but, it wasn’t agreed on, he claimed that he needed to pay his rent, and could only pay the general manager $10,000N.T. per month, but the general manager didn’t agree with this, insisted on suing him, so he could learn this lesson, the hard way.

And all of this was for?  A few EXTRA days off from work?  Are you FUCKING (my B-A-D!!!) kidding me?  Couldn’t you have just told your manager, that you wanted a few days off?  Or, did you already guess, that because of your work performance, showing up late, leaving early, NOT working hard enough, that the manager will NOT approve on your leave of absence, so you’d come UP with this L-I-E, and, you still got caught, didn’t you?

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The Best Gift My Mother-in-Law Had Given to Me

Wisdom, from an older generation, so, did you learn anything here??? Translated…

Shortly after I wed, I’d stepped into my husband’s household, and, looking at this house I’d lived in for over thirty years, from the living room, to the dining area, into the kitchen, there’s NO clutter, and, NOT a speck of dust.

Every storage space, the pots, pans, along with the smaller items, the stationeries, the daily routine things, an assortment of receipts, along with other sorts of paperwork, they’re all sorted, very orderly. Even the plastic bags we got from our shopping trips, are all folded neatly, so the next time we can reuse them again, it’s neat and environmental too.

Because I lacked the ability to put things into order, and so, my original living space became packed with items that are useless. As I’d opened up the drawers in my bedroom, man assortment of things: receipts, pens, scrunchies, along with the thank-you notes I’d gotten from attending someone’s wedding, all got clamped together, and, whenever I needed to find something, I’d had to rummage, and, if I couldn’t find it, then, I simply buy new ones.  Not only did I waste money using this method, I’d also bought a TON of the same things too.

And so, I’d started following my mother-in-law’s rules, learned to classify different things. In order to achieve some task, you must make sure you have the right tools, I’d gone to the 99¢ stores, to pick up storage bins of all sizes, and, reordered my kitchen and bedroom.

Other than the classifications of the pots and pans in the kitchens, I’d stored the similar kinds of foods, instant coffees, soups, into one drawer cabinet; rice, noodles, rice noodles; and the stuff I’d used often, the coffee makers, the tea steamers, into a cabinet that I can access easily; the rarely used ice water jug, thermo mugs, I’d placed them in higher up places.

In the bedrooms, I’d placed various bins too, separated the stationeries, the accessories, along with important documents and hi-tech products; the bills, the receipts, along with an assortment of papers, I’d gotten into the habits, or sorting them when I got home, and, everything became orderly now, no longer are the things all over the places. By this way, not only was I able to save the time on searching for what I needed, I no longer needed to buy the same things repeatedly anymore either.

Classifications of items and putting things in their right places, is a mental taxing and physically challenging activity, not only would I have to consider the properties of the items I’m sorting through, I’d also have to consider the shapes, the sizes, and the frequency of usage, and I’d have to keep in mind, the sizes of the cabinets and the items, and would they fit right in it. But, as I’d managed this skill, my life became orderly now, I’d gotten a TON of things from it.  I believe, that this priceless wisdom of life, is the BEST present that my mother-in-law has ever given to me!

So, she’d rubbed off on you, and, you’d learned, how to keep your life in order, because of your mother-in-law’s influence, that’s a good interaction, isn’t it??? Sure it is!

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Filed under Behavior Modifications, Lending a Helping Hand, Lessons, Life, Observations, Translated Work, Values

My Daughter is Bad at Math

On parent-child interactions, translated…

My daughter is extremely careless, and her careless nature had given me a TON of headaches.  Since she’d started in the third grade, I realized how bad the situation’s getting, all the other subjects, she’d done fine on, but on the quizzes she has in math, her grades are like a rollercoaster ride, one time, she’d scored very high, the next, very low, and it’s all because of her carelessness.

I’d often warned her about the importance of being careful, that her carelessness can change all her hard work to naught.  And, I thought, that maybe she didn’t get enough practice regularly, so, I’d bought her a practice book, and, my daughter finishes them on schedule too.

The grades of her finals this time, her mathematics is right ‘round the bottom, and, I saw, that it is, once again, caused by carelessness.  I don’t know why, but this rage started coming up my system, I’d grabbed onto her backpack, her water bottle, her lunch box, and threw it all outside my house, and screamed at her, “You’re HOPELESS!”

And, I saw my daughter, with tears in her eyes, picked up what I threw out.  I felt regretful, for being so rash, but I was still too angry with her, and so, I didn’t speak a word to her the entire day.

After supper, I’d gone out for a brisk walk, to get rid of my fuming anger.  At the riverside park, I’d met up with Wan-Ting’s mom, her daughter is now in her first year of middle school, she was never studious, and she’d forced her daughter to study, or sent her to cram school, and now, she’d applied the methods of laissez-faire.  Wan-Ting’s mom told me, “I’d understood, that studying is her own business, that she should have it her way, and, after that change of thought, my heart was lifted, and the atmosphere at home also improved.” “Let her slide, is the same as letting myself slide.”  That, was the words of wisdom that Wan-Ting’s mom left for me, it’d benefited me a lot.  Yes, why must I give myself a hard time, because my daughter couldn’t do well in mathematics?  My rash behaviors may imprint on my daughter, and then, I would’ve lost more, I really shouldn’t have!  My daughter can keep on being happy, active and healthy, that, would be the most important goal I should have!

And so, you can see, how the attitude of this mother had changed, from beginning to end, because another mother shared with her, her own experiences in dealing with her own daughter, and so, this mother let go.

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Lashing Out on a Canvas

I took my anger, off the pallets, and I dipped my paintbrush in it, and then, I’d LASHED out on a canvas, I just let my anger run wild AND free, unrestrained, because it needed to be “let out” for a “breather”…

I’d found a way, to lash out now, by painting this mural, using ALL the pains I’d experienced, and, the pieces are finally coming together, instead of being fragmented like they were.  Lashing out on a canvas, that, would be the BEST way, I can possibly, put my ANGER to better use, otherwise, my anger is born to D-E-S-T-R-O-Y, it nearly destroyed me, in coming OUT of me.

Lashing out on a canvas, I started painting, like that kid who didn’t want to color her color books the RIGHT way, I’d started going wild, and just lashed out, and, it took me, years, to finally get everything “painted”, and now I had, I’m hosting my first “art show”…uh, yeah right, I still don’t D-R-A-W!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Awareness, Behavior Modifications, Being Exposed, Coping Mechanisms, Downward Spiral, Letting Go, Life, Observations

My Aunt Took the Hard Road in Love

Some people are just UNLUCKY in love, I suppose, translated…

On my younger cousin’s wedding, I’d met people from my mother’s side of the family whom I rarely got to see, some of whom I hadn’t seen for many years already, like my older cousin’s two sons, I’d still carried the images of them being seven or eight, and now, they’re teens, breaking out already.

“Pearl my older sister!”, a long-haired, plain but beautiful looking woman hollered out at me, “You are…”, before I had the chance to react, my mother’s youngest sister standing behind this beautiful woman stated, “Don’t you remember, she’s Snow.”

What a change!  Standing behind her, were three boys, one, her wild younger brother, another, the youngest brother who’d just entered into middle school, but, there was yet, another boy who was seemingly between my younger and youngest boy cousin’s age, who is he, how come I don’t remember him at all?

Toward my face of questions, the boy didn’t know how to speak up.  My youngest aunt started, “He too, is your younger cousin, the son from your Uncle Chiao who lives in Guanshi.”, then, I started to remember.  When I was in high school, once, my youngest aunt who was pregnant, took me to Uncle Chiao’s to visit, said that Uncle Chiao had been nothing BUT kind to her and her family.  Back then, I was real glad, that my aunt had found someone she could share her life with, someone who’s going to take good care of her.

On the romance history of this youngest aunt of mine, she could write a five-thousand page novel about her own romance.  But, each and every time, the cruel reality always kicks in.

Snow was from the marriage with her first husband, without knowing, that very shortly after Snow was born, the marriage ended, because my aunt couldn’t put up with her husband’s abuse; later, my aunt privately told us, that Snow’s father wasn’t even her first husband.

Not long thereafter, my youngest aunt met another man, and had Snow’s younger brother.  Don’t know if it’s her luck with men, my youngest aunt spent the most part of her life, between the men, and, as a result, all four of her sons had the same mother, but different fathers.

Toward my youngest aunt’s four kids, I truly hope, that they can manage to live their lives to the best of their abilities.

And here, we’re still NOT told W-H-Y, the person’s aunt had so many FAILED marriages, and, we can only hope, that this woman will NOT make the mistakes over, over, and over again, after all, you do NOT want to have a TON of half-siblings, that’s just TOO messed up!

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