From Being Under a High-Pressured Academic Performance Distress at Home, to Being Allowed to Slide to the Bottom, Liang-Je Recalled How Helpless His Mother Was in the Middle of the Nights

From a rebellious son, to now, a father, sharing his experiences, translated…

The television host who was popularized by the show, “The All Time Adventurist”, he looked sunny on the outside all the time, and it’s hard to imagine, that he once lived under his father’s military, high-pressure disciplinary environments, when his father finally let go, this sudden onset of freedom had, made him become a wild mustang, and, he rammed, and ran, lost his way.

Strayed So Far from the Paths, Gladly, His Mother Gave Him a Wakeup Call

“I was the king of all children when I was younger, and would often throw firecrackers into my neighbors’ yards, and, when they’d tattle told on me, I’d gotten punished, to stand up straight, into the middle of the nights.”  Liang-Je’s father is a military man, worked his way up into military school, was the archery representative of the nation, and used the tactics he’d picked up in the military, as the way to educate his own children, strictly followed the corporal punishment rules, to make Liang-Je stay at the top three scorers of his class, when he made below a ninety on exams, he’d still gotten punished to stand outside his home.

“In the elementary years, I was always the top three scorers, in middle school, the top ten, in high school, I’d dropped to the second to last.”  Because he was living under so much pressure for such a long time, when his father finally decided to let go, it’d deterred Liang-Je from wanting to re-experience the pains of his early educational careers, he’d started having a ton of fun, lied, gone home late a lot, “I loved sports too much, I’d often skipped school to play sports, after I was out of school, I’d stayed on the ball courts until nine in the evening, and as I’d gone home, I’d fall asleep, and, my grades were right around where I’m about to be kept in the same grade levels again.”

Because of his father’s education, Liang-Je still kept the bottom line of his morality standards, but he’d admitted, that back then, he felt that his sense of responsibility was dropping lower, and lower still.

What pulled Liang-Je back was not his authoritarian father, but his mother who is gentler and more understanding.  “Once in the middle of the nights, my mom woke me up, told me, ‘you don’t even know if you’ll have a college to attend yet, and this, is merely a small step in life, you hadn’t even taken it, your life is already half-flunked.  If you insisted, we still love you very much, but, you MUST make your choices.’  Back then, I’d made up my mind to stay away from playing sports, I’d signed up for the cram school sessions, and, on the mock exams, my scores went from 120 to 280, and I was finally into college.”  The sense of helplessness in his mother’s voice, her disappointment toward him, was, that wakeup call he’d needed.

No Longer Rebelling, Instead, He’s Used His Heart, to Educate His Own Young Daughter

After being free from the high-stress environment he was raised in, and having gone through his teenage rebellion phase, now, as a father, Liang-Je chose NOT to use the same way that his father educated him to educate his own daughter.  His two little girls are three and one year old, when he wasn’t filming the shows, he’d take the whole family out, “I’d exposed my children to the slides, to the flowers, then, I’d told them their Chinese and English names, a little at a time, to make learning about these things fun for them.”

The older daughter felt a bit neglected after her baby sister was born, and would sometimes, tip over the glasses of water, throw her toys, to get the attention of adults, “Once she’d asked my wife, ‘how come nobody likes me?’ she looked so sad and loss, and so, we’d held a family meeting, and, examined one another’s, as well as our own behaviors.”  So, when his wife carried up their younger child, Liang-Je would carry up the older daughter, “from before when her baby sister would try to crawl into her bedroom, she’d slammed the door shut, we told her, ‘You must help us protect your baby sister’, and now, she’d become the one who is the most capable of making her baby sister smile.”

So, this father was raised in an authoritarian household, and, he’d strayed, so, when he’d become a parent himself, he refused to make the same mistakes in education that his father made with him, because he was raised with such strict manners, and grew up under such duress and pressure, and gotten the taste of consequences of it, he’d changed his ways around education his own young, and that, is learning from one’s own parents’ mistakes, a good father here!

 

 

 

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Filed under Child Development/Education of Children, Childhood, Early Exposures, Lessons, Parenting/Parenthood

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