Let’s Go Back to Before, Interactions with Demented Elderly

“I don’t know what I’d said, to anger you so.  Sis, you must take care of dad!”  My father pulled on my hand which held to my luggage tightly, that, was the very first time, he’d seen him shaken up and choked.

My dad, smart, funny, gentle and kind, was diagnosed with dementia.  On the ceiling of his bedroom walls, I’d decorated it to appear like the starry night skies, with dolphins, so my dad won’t feel alone when he wakes up; the rays of the sun took him to that sentiment of missing us inside; the tail of the comet, took my dad into the home of his sweet dreams.

I’d blown up a couple of photographs, in my dad’s living space, and I’d grabbed a few, to reminisce the old days with him.  “Dad, you’re so handsome!” next to Chenching Lake, he had me in his arms, I was just three years old.  I’d gotten another photo of us by the lake just three years ago, I had my head, against his, with my arms around him, he was so shy he didn’t know how to react to my gesture, because I’d told him, “Dad, I love you so!”  “Daddy, I want water”, “Daddy is my furnace when it gets too cold under the quilts,” my fourth aunt said once, “older brother would smile when he sees his baby girl.”, my youngest aunt stated, “the lovers of a past life”.  Listening to the recordings of our old dreams, “come, baby girl!”, my father annunciated every word.

But he couldn’t now, as he’d become demented, and, all you will have, are the memories of your shared past, and, this just shows how a father loved his daughter so, even IF he doesn’t remember who she is.

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Filed under Coping Mechanisms, Dementia/Deterioration of the Mind, Expectations, Family Dynamics, Family Matters, Life, Old Age

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