Each Night, I’d Prayed for Death

Each night, I’d prayed for death, and yet, somehow (don’t ask H-O-W!!!), I’d always manage to make it ‘til morning light!!!  Each night, I’d prayed for death, because death had become my mercy, with the mercy of death, I no longer need to go through this never-ending vicious cycle of P-A-I-N, getting tortured, by my own GUILTY conscience, over, over, over, AND over again.

Each night, I’d prayed for death, but, does death grace me with ITS presence?  Of course N-O-T, I know that I will NOT die, until I’d suffered long AND hard, and live with the regret, of having done something E-V-I-L, I just wish, that someone, somewhere, can tell me, WHAT, exactly that I’d done, to earn this kind of suffering on my life………

Each night, I’d prayed for death, but, where is it?  Death had claimed everybody I loved, cared about, those who’d mattered to me, and I am still, the one who’s “spared”, the one who’d been CURSED, with this longevity………

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Filed under Connections, Coping Mechanisms, Expectations, Karma, Life, Moods, Emotions, & Feelings, Observations, Perspectives, Philosophies of Life, Properties of Life, Rationalization, Values, Writing

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